Dear People,
Have you ever had one of those moments when you've really, really, hideously messed something up with someone you like and it's all gone wrong because you've been an !rseburger? Yeah. I'm having one of those moments.
Cause you know, it's been a while since that thing'd ever happened. Since then, there's been numerous fights that have spilled over into other people's relationships with me. Fortunately I've managed to clumsily patch them up with a really cr!ppy cross stitch, but that one blow up is the big black un-darned hole in my cushion of life. It's never going to be okay again unless I fix it.
BUT. HOW.
There are no opportunities ... no words I can say to fix it up, no amount of sorry's enough and absolutely no chance of it being the way it was. There's no trust for me, anymore. Do I blame 'em? A little, but that's just conceit speaking.
G!ddamn, I would give anything to make it right again. Anything at all. Just please ... please give me another chance. I ain't no begger, so this is getting pretty damn low for me, but hey ... I wouldn't be going this far if it wasn't eating me alive, anyway. I can't not fix this. It's my mistake, and it must. be. fixed.
But how.
From KR.