Closed In This World It’s Hard to Get It Right

[Harper Alston]

When Harper was younger, her oldest brother had once jokingly compared her to a shark. Like a great white, she needed to constantly be on the move in order to survive, he had claimed. He wasn't entirely wrong. Harper often had an excess amount of energy she needed to burn, and she did feel better when she was active. Plus, keeping busy was a good way to take her mind off of things. Or, in today's case, a person.

Harper's restlessness had taken her to the edge of the lake, and she almost laughed when she realized where she was. What better place to brood than the lake? Except she wasn't really the brooding type, and the whole point of her "keep busy" mantra was to stop herself from doing that. Harper considered her options. It was still a bit too cold to go swimming, and she wasn't really dressed for a run. Instead, she decided to continue her walk along the lake, occasionally stopping to pick up flat, smooth stones. She'd accumulated a small handful when she spotted a familiar figure in the distance. Grinning, Harper waved at the girl with her free hand.

 

[Chloe Thompson]

Being as busy as ever Chloë had found out that she felt the need to get out of the castle and take in the fresh air much more than she used to. She wasn't exactly sure what it was that caused it but that didn't matter as long as it helped. Glancing at the pitch from where she was walking she wondered if she should head up and grab her room, get some laps in, but she was certain that if she did head back inside there would a thing or two coming her way that she'd feel obliged to get done first. Which was exactly why she was outside. To do absolutely nothing for a while. Chloë's feet lead the way without her even thinking too much of where her walk was taking her, squinting when she noticed someone waving further down. Realizing who it was her mind took over again as she headed up to the younger girl who, by now, she pretty much considered her little sister. "Hey! Watcha doin'?"

 

[Harper Alston]

Harper's smile widened when Chloë joined her. She could definitely use the distraction, and besides, she always enjoyed hanging out with the older girl. It struck her that this was the last year they would get to hang out — in the castle, at least — and she tried to push that sad thought away. "Skipping stones, apparently," she said, opening her hand to reveal the rocks she'd collected. "I decided to go on a walk to take my mind off of things, and kind of just ended up here," she explained with a shrug. She wasn't going to spend too much time trying to figure out why her subconscious had led her to the lake. "Wanna join me?" she asked, holding out the stones. Harper wasn't sure why the other girl was out here, but Chloë wasn't carrying a broom so Harper assumed she wasn't on her way to Quidditch practice.

 

[Chloe Thompson]

Chloë laughed softly at Harper's answer, although part of it seemed to give away that the girl wasn't entirely sure why she was doing what she was doing. What Harper said next only confirmed that and she couldn't help but notice something was up with her. "Sure." She grinned when Harper offered her some of the stones, taking a few and flicking the first one at the water as best as she could. The stone calmly moved over the water's surface before eventually disappearing with a small splash. "So, what's up? What kind of things do you need your mind taken off of..?" Chloë asked carefully as she glanced at the younger girl from the corner of her eye. Being a teenager at the school there was a multitude of things Harper could be dealing with and guessing what might be going on would be a waste of time. Asking without trying to pry was the best option. She focussed her attention back on the lake as she tossed a second stone, hoping to make it skip more times than the first had done as she waited for the girl's reply.

 

[Harper Alston]

Harper watched as Chloë's stone leapt across the surface of the lake before sinking below. She sent her own rock skipping through the water, taking comfort in the familiarity of the action. It reminded her of all the times she and her brothers had hung out at the pond near their house when they were younger. Her reminiscing was cut short by Chloë's question, and she took a few moments trying to decide how honestly she wanted to answer. "Just the usual stuff, like classes and OWLs." Harper hesitated for a second before adding, "And a guy." It wasn't that she didn't trust Chloë or that she was embarrassed, but rather that she had convinced herself that her best shot at getting over her unfortunate crush on Nikko was not dwelling on the fact that she had an unfortunate crush on him. But as Harper tossed another stone into the lake, it occurred to her that if anyone could give advice about crushing on a friend, it was probably Chloë. "Can I ask you a kind of personal question?" she asked, glancing at the other girl.

 

[Chloe Thompson]

Chloë had to admit it had been a while since she had been skipping rocks, which was strange since she remembered how calming she had often found it. Maybe it had been because she had found other ways to clear her head, like flying laps around the pitch. She nodded when Harper mentioned classes and OWLs. That alone was enough to get a kid's head spinning during fifth year, she had been well aware of that herself. Her lips formed an 'O' when the girl added something else. A guy. Which was also something she knew would get a girl's head spinning. Especially if it was someone close to Harper. Then again, having a crush on someone a little less reachable might just be as confusing. "Any time." Chloë smiled when Harper asked if she could ask her a personal question, curious what it would be and how it would relate to her just revealing she had a crush.

 

[Harper Alston]

Harper shot Chloë a grateful smile. It didn't matter if the older girl later changed her mind. The fact that she had immediately answered "any time" when any other person would have hesitated or waited to hear the actual question meant a lot. "You and Sully were friends before you started dating, right?" She was pretty sure she had seen the two of them hanging out in the common room, but maybe that had been after they started dating. Time was strange. Harper still couldn't quite believe that she was a fifth year and that Chloë was in her last year. She turned back to the lake, finding that it made it easier to ask her next question. "Were you ever worried that telling him about your feelings would ruin your friendship?" It was as much a confession of Harper's own personal worries as it was a question for the older girl.

 

[Chloe Thompson]

Chloë tossed another stone at the lake as she waited for Harper's question, not really trying to skip it but instead watching on as it broke the water's surface with a soft splash. She looked back at the other girl when the question left her lips, giving a small nod in response. "Yeah, we were. Really good friends too." She told her with a small smile, silently connecting the dots about where this conversation might be going. Having a crush on someone was nerve-wrecking enough, but having a crush on a friend had always seemed worse. Like there was so much more at stake. "Honestly? I was nervous, yes, but the way things went between us I had a hunch that he possibly liked me too quite early on. So I guess things for me were.. easy." She admitted, hoping Harper wouldn't be disappointed since it might not be the answer she was looking for. It also made her realize how lucky she had been in not having to spend a great deal of time worrying about having a crush on one of her best friends. "I reckon it's nothing short of normal to be worried about that though." Chloë added calmly, turning her body to face Harper rather than straining her neck looking sideways. "It means you value your friendship enough to not want to hurt it."

 

[Harper Alston]

Harper could feel her heartbeat pick up at Chloë's confirmation. She turned to face the older girl, hoping that just hearing about Chloë's experiences would help her find a path out of her own predicament. But as the older girl spoke, Harper's heart sank like one of the stones she had tossed in the lake. It seemed their circumstances were very different. Harper was pretty sure Nikko didn't like her that way.

"I know," Harper said quietly when Chloë tried to reassure her that her feelings were normal. "I just..." She sighed and looked back out at the lake, turning a stone over in her hand as she tried to figure out how to untangle her thoughts into something comprehensible. "I don't think he likes me that way. But there's still that question of 'what if,' you know?" It certainly didn't help that Harper had a natural disposition towards hope even in cases where it was irrational. "And sometimes I wish I could just tell him so I can put it out there, get rid of the 'what if,' and get over this crush for good." She wasn't afraid of rejection; she expected it, even. She was afraid of getting rejected and then losing a friend. "So I guess what I really need is advice on how to get over a crush," she said with a humorless laugh.