Confined to Seperate Sides

Alis didn't know what to make out of Adalyn's behavior and actions. She was an enigma to him, he didn't expect what it was that she would do, or what is what that she would say. She's like a puzzle that no matter how hard he tried to solve, he still can't. But nevertheless, Alois is not one to give up, and he knew that someday, he'll be able to understand her, it might be too far out in the future, but he's definitely not going to loose hope.

He had just listened without nay word as she had once again started singing, there were just too much things that he can't seem to figure out about her, the lyrics of her songs, the way she dresses, the way she retorts back to what he was saying, even the way she would move, everything just don't make a lot of sense. "Adalyn, you're weird." He commented as she had finished singing, that was after all, the only thing that he could really say about her, she was weird, not the bad kind of weird, but well, something like a riddle or a maze, like, when he had had thought that he had understood her, more questions would follow.
 
Adalyn smiled as she paused for the guitar break she wanted to put into the song. Of course there was no guitar and he thought she was done, but he was jsut confused. Confused like her, about everything, life and it's meaning, people. She looked away to the left and stared at the pine tree that was there.
"Do you understandwho I am
Do you wanna know
Can you really see through me now
I am about to go

Just tonight I won’t leave
And I’ll lie and you’ll believe
Just tonight I will see
It’s all because of me

Just tonight I will stay
And we’ll throw it all away
When the light hits your eyes
It’s telling me I’m right
And if I, I am through
It’s all because of you
Just tonight

(Do you understand who I am)
It’s all because of you
Just tonight

(Do you understand who I am)
It’s all because of you
Just tonight

(Do you understand who I am)
It’s all because of you
Just tonight."
Adalyn waited, she had finished her song. It was over now and she had nothing else to say, her song was a question for him but if he was as confused as she figured he was, he wouldn't know it was. "I'm done, and I know," she whisphered to him looking back to him to gauge his reaction to the song she and her band wrote. It wasn't the happiest but never was she, that much was obvious. He said she was weird, she knew that already but atleast she wanted to feel something unlike him who was pulling away because he loved his best friend.
 
Alois flushed a bit when he had realized that his conjecture was once again wrong, Adalyn wasn't finished singing yet. Mentally kicking himself for being not knowledgeable about the said song, he had just listened once again, the song was indeed pretty emotional, some lyrics, he can't even understand. It seems like it was about some sort of a messed up relationship, yet he wasn't really sure about that. It's kind of irritating really, how he can't figure anything out.

"Honestly speaking, I don't really understand anything Adalyn, but there was something about your song that's telling me that it's kind of like.. a one sided relationship or something? Like, there was this girl who was actually in pain seeing that not everything seemed to be working just fine." He paused, thinking whether he was actually making sense or not, for he himself cannot really understand whether what he was saying was indeed correct.

"Here I am and I can't seem to see straight I'm too numb to feel right now, I think, it implies that she's staying because she doesn't have enough strength to leave yet. She's numb because it's a cruel cycle that continues to happen, after being subjected to it time and time again, she has shut off that part of her that responds to the things that are happening.And here I am watching the clock that's ticking away my time I'm too numb to feel right now, I guess, She knows its over and that there isn't any chance of a change for him, and she was just wasting her time, yet, she'll still stay because she loves him." He added, his tone actually a bit unsure, he had actually just stated what it was that he was thinking, no real idea whether his interpretation of the song was correct, nevertheless, he had decided to give it a try, "Adalyn, what's the real meaning behind that song?"
 
Adalyn rolled her eyes when he started analyzing the song, that wasn't the point of music. "Does everything have to make sense? Does it have to have a meaning?" She asked him as he asked her what is meant, what the real meaning behind the song was. He got it all wrong of course, he didn't put two and two together is seemed. It was just one song all meaning the same one thing, yet he couldn't even piece it all together.

"The girl is high, from drugs of course. She's with a guy, she shouldn't be with, maybe she's already taken or he is, whatever, but they are together for the night. She feels its alright to be with him because she does love him. She knows that its wrong, hence why she's numb...the clock is meaning her time with him and before she has to face punishment for what's she done, or the time she has before she gets overdosed and dies your choice," she said with a laugh though it really shouldn't be considered funny. "She can't see straight because she's high and everything goes crazy when that happens, which is the only reason why she's even there because drugs and alcohol brings about the ugly in everyone, the truth being what's ugly. And ugh now i'm tired from all this talking," she said as she laid down to one side of him.
 
Alois cannot help but to smirk when he saw Adalyn roll her eyes, really, it reminded him of Adrie when she does that, Adrie, after all, had that tendency to roll her eyes to everything that he would say. "Probably, I mean, it would be really better to have sense in everything, that way, you'll be able to understand things fully." He said with a shrug, trying to justify why he had even asked such a question in the first place. "But it's actually up to you, whether you'll accept what I had just said or not, but you know, I think every lyrics of a music has a real meaning behind it, not just the literal meaning of the words being stated, but rather, the emotions and feelings of the writer while he was writing that song."

He then listened as Adalyn started explaining what the song really meant, well, actually, his interpretation was really far fetched from hers. The only thing that's in common was that, it was indeed some kind of a one sided relationship, where the girl was actually not supposed to have any relationship with the boy at all. "I didn't think that the pills in the lyrics would mean literally that she was high on drugs." He said honestly, chuckling a little as she laughed. It was amusing really, it was like, it's the first time that he had seen her laugh then and there. "That's the first time that you had talked to me using too many sentences Adalyn.." He remarked, laughing harder this time as he copied what she had just done, lying down in the ground just next to her.
 
Adalyn looked away as he kept talking she wasn't paying attention to what he said, it didn't matter anyways. His words were already important to other people, Adalyn never listened to anyone. "Of course, I won't, you were wrong," she told him at the end of his speech. She didn't look back at him then not wanting to see his emotions that always seemed to play across his face.

The shade he had been casting on her face disappeared as he laid down next to her and she waited to talk till she could focus on one answer and not five with four of them telling him he was stupid. "That's rock and roll, it's there in front of you, not hidden behind context," she told him. Adalyn glanced over at him, his head near hers and she watched as he laughed. "And it hurt," she explained back her face blank of emotion like it had been when he first approached her.
 
Alois frowned yet at the same time, he knew that he should have expected that answer from her. He should have known that she will not really listen to everything that he had just said, yet, here he was, being talkative not even minding if there was actually a point in his rambling. "Fine, I'm wrong, it's what you think anyways. " He said, deciding to not push the topic any further, it would just cause some irritation in the girl's side after all, and just like what Adrie would say, respect her choice.

"It's your song, you know it better than I do.." He then said, his eyes now locked to hers as he tried to solve this puzzle who was currently talking to him. He was taken back by what she had stated, he didn't exactly know why she had said that it hurt, it's kind of confusing really. "It hurts for you to talk that much? , you're confusing" He questioned, now feeling a bit guilty for not even thinking that when he was enjoying the conversation, Adalyn probably wasn't. That makes him a lot selfish and unfair then. And now that he had actually think about it, Adalyn was not just one puzzle that he needed to solve, for just when he had thought that he had understood her from her songs, here he was faced with another challenge, thinking whether he would be able to really understand this girl sooner.
 
Adalyn laughed once with her mouth still closed and a smirk on her face as he gave up his pursuit in a conversation on her song. She hadn't though the was going too but he did which was nice she had to many words flowing through her brain already. She let it drop as he did.

Adalyn turned to her side so she was facing him her arm above her head so she could use it to rest on. She looked over him again observing him but didn't try to hide that she was. "You try to understand everything...including me. But it's not making sense... but it isn't you. I don't make sense. I'm weird," she said back using more words then she had planned to and she lost the phrase she had been working out in her head for a new song. Adalyn wanted her writing pad but decided to give up working on the song for now, Alois wasn't going to go away anytime soon and she would just frustrate herself.
 
Alois just sighed in frustration as Adalyn began talking, honestly, he can't understand her. But being him as well, it's not like he would give up that easily on that, right? "That sounds like a song now Adalyn." He commented, still frowning. He didn't really realized how expressive he was, when he's annoyed, he frowns, when he's happy, he smiles, that's probably why it was so easy to read him.

"I try to give sense to everything, I want to understand..." He then added knowing full well that she'll have some retort to what he had just said, actually, it's kind of frustrating in his part, not because she was annoying, but rather, it was because she was just a mystery, and it seemed like he won't be able to solve her anytime soon. "You're weird..that's for sure." He then muttered, sulking to himself.
 
Now Alois was just as unhappy as she was, but it was completely different unhappiness. He was upset with her and she upset with the world. It didn't sound like a song she would sing but she didn't retort back to him, instead she looked at the wall looming up near their heads. Looking back to him she blinked slowly a light smile coming to her face, he was unhappy with alot of things it seemed.

Using her elbow she moved her arm down and moved herself up so her upper half was off the ground. Her free arm move to the other side of him and she looked down at him, hair hair covering his sight, he wouldn't have any choice but to look at her or her cross which dangled down almost his chest. "Well Don't. Stop caring, you only get youself hurt. Though you already are, and... just move on Alois...god. If she doesn't want you, you can't change her mind...... I'm sorry," she added feeling bad for having to tell him such a thing and trapping him again. The time she had been mad, now she pitied him but she didn't want too. Looking down at him she could see more of the emotion he was going through but she didn't comment on it, if he was already hurt she'd just make it worse by telling him more.
 
The truth hurts, but no matter how one tries to deny it, it still is the truth, no doubt. One cannot change what's there already, no matter how hard one tries to deny it, nothing will change. And that thing, though it was really painful and hard, Alois knew that he should accept that. Just like what Adalyn had said, he can't change Adrie's mind. Yet, be it crazy as it was, even though he had wanted to accept Adrie's choice, there was still a part of him that didn't want to do that. He's just.. stubborn probably.

Closing his eyes as he tried to not look at Adalyn when she had once again cornered him, Alois had tried to sort everything out. What she was saying hurts, yet, she was only stating the fact, he can't really blame her, can he? "I can't stop caring. . I don't care if I'll be hurt.." He said, his heart beating faster at everything that he had said. He hated it, he didn't like being emotional, and most of all, he actually didn't want to be reminded of everything that Adalyn was saying. "I'm selfish, I know that." He added, trying to get up, but can't. After all, if he did get up, then, chances are, Adalyn would fall off, seeing that she was not making any move to set him free from her then. "Don't be sorry." this time, he was looking at her, really, it was the first time someone had actually told him the exact things that Adalyn was saying, she's way too honest it seems, whichis probably good if only they were not on the situation that they are now.
 
Adalyn watched as he closed his eyes, behind them emotions were running through him but she couldn't help. She couldn't make him angry and she doubted if she said she'd listen to his problems be a shoulder for him she actually would, and she figured he knew that as well. "You do, no one wants to hurt," said the girl who had been in relationships with most of the upperclass besides her own band mates, of course nothing ever lasted. She saved herself for marriage and the guys didn't like that or believed her so she ended it.

When he tried to move she didn't move herself to let him he needed to stay put for once and not talk his way out of things. "She's the selfish one," she told him shaking her head as he told her differently. Her hair lightly hit either side of his face and she cracked a smile at the image. It had taken him awhile to break and actually look at her but she stil had a smile on her face when he did. Her head tilted at his statement curious why he didn't want her sympathy. "Fine..." Her voice leading off ready to start another sentence but it just blanked as she looked down at him, he was the puzzle now.
 
Alois can't really understand why, why it was him who was now trying to run away when he himself had told Adrie to not run away from him, to actually learn how to accept thing. It's quite ironic isn't it? How he was now appearing weak in front of Adalyn, and how he wanted to blame himself for being like that. He can't possibly run away, he just can't. "If it's what it takes to preserve the relationship that you have, then it's fine." He answered back to her, his voice gentle with a hint of regret in it. Really, there would be times when he would think about what would actually happen if he had meet Adrie first before Jack, or if he had actually meet this girl then. "And the time will come that I'll be able to move on then, but at this moment, I don't really care if I'm hurt at all."

Alois frowned when Adalyn said that Adrie was the selfish one, really, he didn't like hearing that at all, not because he was being biased, but because he knew that Adalyn didn't really have to say that at all, she haven't even met Adrie yet for her to say that. "She's not selfish, alright?" He said his voice firm yet it still had this gentleness in it. He had had smiled then when she started smiling to, really, it's really great to see someone smile, even when he's already feeling down, just seeing someone smile for him could actually make him a little better.
 
Adalyn sighed and looked down to her cross he wasn't doing a good job of understanding but she wasn't doing a good job with understanding him it seemed. He was hooked on this one girl he wasn't even going to open his eyes. He'd rather be in pain then give this girl up and Adalyn couldn't understand. "You shouldn't have to be hurt," she told him looking back to his eyes before glancing away towards her bright white-blonde hair.

He shot her statement down almost immediantly after she said it. He didn't sound harsh but this girl was a touchy subject for him and she understood that. Adalyn actually understood alot about him, at home surrounded by her people she was always talking, never able to shut-up. It was when she was out off that zone she couldn't find the words to say, but then again she never had been a genius at English most of the songs were translated into english from her writing by her brother and he managed to have them make sense in the weird phrasing that English people called normal. "Alright.." her voice said leading off again as she looked back to his face and seeing the smile there. Her smile was still in place on her face but she didn't have a clue why he smiled but it propelled her to lean down towards his face. Her lips landed on his, not in a hungry passionate 'I'm-about-to-die' kiss and neither was is just a peck. She stayed there for a few seconds her eyes had closed on contact before she pulled away. A hint of her smile was still in the corners of her mouth and her outward apperance was calm but inside she was afraid he'd push her away even though he hadn't before. Alois loved someone else, it was the story of her life, it always happened to her.
 
Alois smiled, it seemed like Adalyn was actually concerned about him now, at least that's how it looked like to him, and just knowing that, he felt that he had at least triumph over something. "Thank you Adalyn, but. . it's my choice, I decided to put up with the pain, to feel hurt is a part of the learning process in life after all. And as long as I can keep up with that, I'm fine. I'm just a common person, but in one respect, I think that I had succeeded as gloriously as any man could ever had, I have loved, and I had felt pain, that thing is enough for me." He said, realizing that once again, he spoke too much. He wasn't even sure if the girl had actually listened to what it was that he had said, and he himself, he wasn't sure if he had expressed what he was thinking properly.

Alois' eyes widened when he felt Adalyn's lips on his. He was frozen in place for once again, he had been caught off guard, that had happened twice already, and this time, just like before, he didn't exactly know what he would do. That kiss wasn't passionate nor was it just a casual one, nevertheless, he wasn't able to react at all. There was this turmoil of emotions once again, confused, surprised. . . yet, he can't push her away. He had this thought that she wasn't really that aware of what she had done, and at that, he can't really be angry, can he? When she pulled away with that smile still on her face, Alois had just stared his eyes fixed on hers. Really, that kiss had effectively shut him up. "What-why did you do that?" He then asked, his heart beating faster and his eyes wavering a bit, he needed to find answer, that's all.
 
Adalyn watched as he mouth moved with words flowing out of them, it didn't seem he was actually listening to her now. He wanted to be close to that girl even if it meant he was in pain all the time. She didn't understand why he kept talking it seemed obvious that she wasn't going to listen to his stupid rambling, Adalyn didn't agree with what he was saying and choice not to listen anymore.

Adallyn felt him freeze underneath her, it wasn't a suprise he had just came off of a big speech and she was suprising him. It only took him a moment before he started talking again but this time it was less and she actually wanted to know what he was going to say. She didn't have an answer to his question so she just looked down at him at his eyes. His lips were slightly darker now from her lipstick but no one would notice the change. Finally after about half a minute that seemed to be forever, she looked away as pain overtook her. "It just...felt..right," she admitted to him looking at the blonde hair of hers that was next to his face instead of looking at him. She knew she'd do it again, he needed to be proven that being hooked on one girl wasn't a good idea.
 
Alois was at a lost. He didn't have any idea of what it was that he should do. Even the stillness and the silence that had passed between them when she had tried to think of an answer was actually starting to feel like an eternity, like, time was moving too slow, and there were thousand of thoughts going through his mind, and that's actually not good. He can't think straight, and actually, he hated it when he can't understand a thing, it makes him feel uneasy.

Alois was snapped out of his thoughts when Adalyn had started to say something. It just felt right was what she had said, yet, he can't quite accept that. those words were not enough to actually justify what it was that she had done. "Stop Adalyn, I know that you didn't mean it." He then muttered after thinking of an appropriate response to what she had just said, he didn't want to hurt the girl's feelings, and he surely didn't want to use her as well.
 
Adalyn glanced back at him when he denied her answer. It was a true answer and yet he couldn't accept it and that frustrated her. Stomach was in knots and she didn't know what to do, leaning on her arm on the far side of him she used her other one to move his back like she had done before. "It did. I'd do it again, like I said you shouldn't have to hurt," she told him looking back to his eyes. Her's were narrowed with hurt written on them though she tried to make the emotion go away.

Alois' response stung her hitting her right in the gut. She had known better then to let someone in, especially someone so close to her age. Older guys were always wanting just one thing and she wouldn't give it to them. They never were around for much longer, but Alois seemed the clingy type. Her face was looming over him on the verge of kissing him again but she wanted it to be his choice, either puch her away or pull her in. It was his desicion now.
 
Alois was silenced with Adalyn's response. He can't quite think of an appropriate answer for that. She's really unpredictable it seems. Just earlier, it was her who was pushing him away, not wanting him to get involve with her. Yet, now, the table was turned, it looks as if he was the one who was pushing her away now. He didn't mean it, but it had happened. Looking at her eyes, Alois had instantly known that he had hurt her, there was pain written all over them, and it made hem feel really guilty. "Sorry Adalyn." He said. He was well aware that Adalyn would probably get annoyed now, seeing that that is how she reacted when he had apologized to her before.

He wasn't sure of what to do now, feeling her close next to him was actually sending butterflies in his stomach. With one hand, he pushed himself up, the other, on her shoulder, and without further ado, he had hugged her. "Thank you for bearing with me now." He said. He didn't quite get what had occurred to him, or why he had hugged her. Yet, that was the only thing that he could do now. He was on appearing to be rather weak at the moment, and he didn't like it. But nevertheless, this concern that Adalyn was showing, though she wouldn't admit it to him, it actually felt nice, and he had no other way to show his gratitude than his simple gesture that he had done.
 
Adalyn smiled he couldn't even talk, there wasn't a right answer for her statement. They both were confused and Adalyn was tired of not feeling but she knew she picked the wrong person to have feelings for. When he told her he was sorry she wasn't sure what he was sorry for. "I'm not," she answered back automatically. It was true, it was nice to kiss someone for once who didn't just want to get in her pants, of course she was only 14 she never thought about doing anything. Adalyn didn't have anything else to say to him he was still wrapped up in the other girl and he wasn't going to grow out of it, it would seem.

When he hugged her Adalyn stayed still, she didn't know what it meant. She was used to the one arm over her shoulders as she and the guy walked down the hall but this was different. Her stomach tightened more but she realized it was just butterflies, she was nervous about what he was going to do. It was nice, though it had the potential to be awkward but it only would be if he made it so. "You're...welcome," she told him unsure how to respond to his statement.
 
Adalyn's smile was different than that of Adrie's, that, Alois was sure of. Adrie's was much more easier to understand, she smiles when she's happy, and he love seeing that, but in Adalyn's case, her smile hold mystery in it. It's like, he wasn't sure whether she was smiling because she was happy, or she was smiling to put up a mask to whatever pain it was that she was feeling inside. "I can't really understand you..you're probably the only puzzle that I can't solve." He said, this time, smiling gently at the younger girl. Though she had just kissed him earlier, he was starting not to get quite awkward with her, cause honestly, she seemed like she could be a really great friend, one who'll be able to scold him when he's doing something wrong, and one who could bluntly tell him the truth.

He didn't let go of Adalyn though she had seemed to be quite surprise with his gesture. On the outside, once someone sees them, they'll probably think that something was going on, but he can't give any care about that now. "You sure are weird you know.." He whispered to her as he moved back, finally releasing her with a laugh. He didn't want to have the awkward atmosphere to return once again, it felt quite better now, he was starting to return to his normal self. hopefully though, she wouldn't bring out the topic about him being in pain once again.
 
Adalyn raised her eyebrows at his statement, she had been thinking the same thing about him in all honestly. Looking away from him for a second she tilted her head as she thought her mind going everywhere before looking back up to his eyes. "I know. But if you would just...hmm...just open yourself and forget your pain you'd be able to solve who I was," she said knowing he'd never be invited to see the band play in the dungeon unless she said it was okay. But Adalyn didn't have any plans of letting him come down into her world till he forgot about the other girl, even if it was just for one night.

Adalyn listened to him as he whisphered to her, finally letting her go. She had the urge to kiss him once again but knew it wouldn't be right. Instead she nodded and pulled herself back lying down next to him again, only this time her head was by his feet and his head by her feet. They were the opposite type of people it just seemed to fit the moment to move away from him. She had a hand on her stomach trying to make the strange sensations go away. Looking up the blue sky she wondered when it was going to snow, when would winter come and freeze her again.
 
Aloised sighed when Adalyn had brought the topic about him forgetting his pain once again, about him to let go of the feeling that he was holding on to. He knew that she had a point, he should move one, yet, he also knew that moving on and forgetting was not that easy. "It takes time Adalyn, someday, for sure, I can show myself to you and say that I have let go, and that I had move on. . "[/b ]He said, his voice serious and sure though deep inside, he wasn't quite sure when that day would happen, or, if it would ever happen at all.

Lying down once again, Alois cannot help but to have his mind wander about. He seemed to have that tendency nowadays, whenever he was alone, or whenever he wasn't really doing anything, he would start to think about things and questions that he can't seem to find any answer to. "If you could turn back time, or if you could just... do everything all over again, would you change anything? " He questioned her, wanting to know her opinion about the said matter. He had heard others say that they wouldn't change anything, that everything had happened for a reason, yet, he can't really believe what it was that they had just said.
Adalyn was blunt and she's honest, thus, he knew that she would answer him truthfully too.
 
Adalyn shook her head at him she was about ready to scream at him but instead she just let out her breath and counted to ten and then back down. He didn't understand how easy it would be to move on, he could always come back if she decided she liked him but now he was just hurting himself by holding onto her so much. He wouldn't do teh one thing she did everyday, forget pain and move on. He wanted to be in pain and suddenly she realized she knew who he was and it made sense to her.

Adalyn heard him question her and she thought about it and realized he didn't give her enough details to answer. "Start from when we first met, or do you mean turn back a few years?" She asked him already knowing the answer to both but she wasn't sure which one she wanted him to actually hear, the first was embarrasing the second was just plain stupid and would probably lead her into being seductive and kiss him again as she remembered seeing same thing happen in a movie one time.
 
Alois had had to laugh when he had realized that he had actually confused Adalyn with his question, he had guessed that he wasn't really able to explain things out properly. "What I mean is, if you will have the chance to redo or change something, what it is that you will change?" Alois said, restating his question, this time, he hoped that he was able to communicate it properly. He really wanted to hear what it was that Adalyn would say, he, after all, would probably be able to understand her better if she did. Cause right at the moment, it seemed like she was the one who had intruded into his world and that she was now the one who was reading him like an open book. It was supposed to be the other way around, he was the one who was trying to understand her, yet, what was happening now was that it was her who's able to understand him.
 
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