Flashback Time

Toni simply nodded when Sam said it was a good day. When was it ever a bad day when she was with Sam? Her mind flashed to a few days where Toni had a fight with Sam that made the day completely awful. All those days were her fault. This is why you can't get into that again Toni thought knowing how awful she would feel if things turned out the same way between them again, even if it would be completely worth it. Forget it She thought again still not forgetting the topic that was spinning in her mind.

He doesn't want to go in now Toni thought happily when Sam said he would stay a bit longer with her He probably doesn't care either way though Toni thought this time not as happy. As Sam spoke, Toni was pushed out of her thoughts. "Oh classes and stuff" Toni said feeling like an idiot for repeating what Sam had just said, but it was her first reaction. "Yeah they are cool and all that. Classes I mean yeah there okay" Toni said knowing that she was babbling but really at the time she was unable to stop. Rarely something that happened. "How is everything with you class wise and such" She said looking over at Sam flashing him a small smile. She really couldn't help but smile when she looked at him, his wonderful smile, eyes, just perfect.
 
Sam noticed that Toni was babbling but he didn't dare stop her. He loved her voice and could always listen to it. He was so absorbed with her that he didn't realise that she had asked the question. It was a few seconds before he answered, "Oh they're alright I guess. I don't have Astronomy or Herbology this term so thats all good. Though next term is going to be hell!" He said with a laugh and looked over at Toni. Something which he shouldn't have done, because she looked exceptionally beautiful. Sam wasn't thinking too much and he automatically leaned his head towards her a tiny bit, only an inch before he realised what he was doing. He looked down at the grass and then leaned back that inch hoping that she didn't notice.

He couldn't believe it, he had leaned in to kiss her! Oh you idiot! That could have wrecked everything. Sam drummed his fingers against his thigh just to pass the awkwardness of it all. "Do you have them this term?" He asked knowing it was a stupid question, but it was better than leaning in to kiss her as much as he wanted to he wouldn't allow it. Just like he wouldn't allow himself to think of her that way though that didn't always work.
 
Toni was glad that Sam said nothing of her babbling. Why was she babbling all of a sudden. Something was up and really Toni didn't know how she was going to solve it. Either forget about Sam or do something about what you're feeling She thought not knowing if she could do either thing. Looking over at Sam when he spoke about Herbology and Astronomy. Toni secretly loved Astronomy but she hated Herbology with a passion it was so gross and disgusting.

Though before she could say another she caught Sam moving in slightly closer, not too close but enough that Toni's heart began to beat almost out of her chest. Not taking her eyes off of him she was more than saddened when he once more moved to his orginal sitting position. What did you think he was going to do? God get your head back on The voice in Toni's head seemed to yell at her. "so close" She whispered softly not meaning to say it aloud. Leaning her head once more against the tree she closed her eyes. Only then was she safe from making glances over at Sam.

Calm down calm down She said bringing her hand to her heart the beating was so fast it felt like her heart was going to jump out of her chest. "Sam maybe we should head in now" She said suddenly passing off his question. Before Toni did something stupid she needed to get out of there and clear her head. Opening her eyes she glanced over at Sam wondering if Sam would find it odd her sudden change to want to actually go inside now. Just go clear your head. That's all you need She thought looking away from Sam once more.
 
Sam looked over to Toni as she whispered something, though he ddidn't actually get what she said. If she whispered it she most likely didn't want it to be heard, still he couldn't help but wonder what it was she said. Did she notice him leaning in towards her? Oh god I hope not. Sam thought desperately.

Sam looked away letting his mind trying to work out what she just said, it beat thinking about her and letting his heart run riot. Though what Toni said next caught him off guard, it wasn't the answer to his question anyway. "Oh, okay sure." Sam said to her as kindly as he could, he didn't know why the sudden change of mind but maybe it was best. He could really think about stuff..well Toni.

"Are you okay?" Sam asked her cautiously as he leaned forward from the tree and looked at Toni, maybe she was feeling unwell? Or she could just want to leave. The second thought was more realistic he thought, why would she want to spend more time outside freezing, with him? He gave her a small smile though his heart was bouncing in his chest and all he wanted to do was to wrap his arms around her. For now a smile would have to do. He wasn't even going to tell himself off for thinking like that, he would leave that for later on that night.
 
Toni hated the idea of going inside now, when they had at least a few more minutes left together. So much could happen in a few minutes. That's what I'm scared of something happening Toni thought not sure as to why she didn't want something to happen or maybe it was more that she wanted something to happen yet feared the friendship that was at risk. Either answer would work or was it something more some other part of the puzzle that Toni had not even realized herself.

Are you Okay? Sam's voice rang through her mind. How could she seriously answer that question honestly. 'well my heart is pounding out of my chest just looking at you and the butterflies in my stomach are going crazy wild. I can't think straight cause all my thoughts are about you.' she wanted to say. How much she really wanted to say that, but she couldn't. She couldn't risk everything for Sam to tell her that he didn't feel that way towards her anymore.

"I'm... fine" Toni said pausing slightly between the two words. Fine was probably the worse word to use ever. Whenever someone used the word fine they really meant that they were quite the opposite. "I think I'm getting too much fresh air. Maybe coming down with pond water disease" Toni said making one last attempt at a joke as she tried to tear her eyes off Sam. It wasn't going to work, it was almost impossible for her to do. Look away look away Her mind shouted yet her eyes didn't want to follow this simple task.
 
Sam raised one of his eyebrows her 'I'm... fine' was very unconvincing. "Okay..? Are you sure?" Sam asked her. If she wants to go in, just go in. Don't ask questions. Sam told himself. He then pushed himself off the grass. He couldn't help but laugh at her joke, "Yeah I here that Pond Diease is vital." He winked.

Sam didn't know wheter to hold out his hand to help her up or to just let get up herself. It was rude not to hold out his hand, but he knew that his heart would go crazy and his stomach may burst literally with the amount of butterflies in his stomach. He looked down at her Toni, his supposedly friend, he then held out his hand for her. "Here." He said softly. So far his heart was beating wildly and she hadn't even taken it yet.
 
Toni could tell that Sam didn't believe her that she was fine. "I'm sure." She said hopefully with a more convincing tone. This Slytherin tried to keep her gaze on Sam not wanting to make it obvious that she was nothing but fine, that she was confused beyond belief. Though as Sam got up Toni was glad she heard a laugh come out of his mouth. The air seemed to lighten a bit around them, but still Toni was not sure how much of this odd aura she was going to be able to take. This isn't just going away. She thought knowing that at this time she couldn't go indepth with what 'this' really was. Back in her dorm on the other hand she would have plenty of time to think, that was if Ava and Daisy weren't there.

Looking at Sam's hand, Toni reached out hoping this wouldn't make her just lose her cool completely and took his hand. Her heart began to beat so loud she could hear it all the way up in her ears. Sam can't hear that right? Toni thought and hoped that he couldn't. How awful would that be. Toni probably already seemed insane all she needed was Sam to point out how loud and fast her heart beat was going. That would make her look even more insane.

Standing up, with the help of Sam she let go of his hand. "Thanks" She said looking down at her outfit which was still rather wet. Not that Toni at this moment cared but her outfit looked like. It was more to just keep her eyes focused on something other than Sam. The fact that Toni was still wearing Sam's shirt was obvious though she wasn't sure what to do. Did she take it off now? Did she wait until she got it all washed up before she gave it back? What would people think about Toni walking into the school soaked wearing Sam's shirt? What would people think of Sam walking in wet and without a shirt? Why did Toni care so much about what other people thought? Looking back up at Sam, she didn't look away nor did she speak for a moment. "Umm I should probably give your shirt back" She said with a small smile though really she made no movement to do so.
 
Sam wanted to hold Toni's hand and not let it go but she pulled hers away from his. Just shows she is not having these feelings. Sam thought to himself, what was he expecting? Because he had these feelings she was supposed to too? Sam let his hand drop to his side were it fidgeted with the pocket of his jeans.

He was in someway glad that Toni looked down at her outfit it mean't he didn't have to avoid eye contact with her. He watched her with his calm ocean blue eyes, his heart thumped so loud and heavily that he thought it would burst from his ribcage. Once Toni looked up Sam's eyes darted to the side.

As Toni offered to give his shirt back Sam nodded slowly, "Right...yeah.." He couldn't walk into the castle and up to the fourth floor bare chested. He didn't make a move nor did Toni and his eyes caught her beautiful brown ones. They locked and he didn't dare break the gaze. Silence filled the air and he was almost glad that it was there, though for once this night the silence wasn't awkward. In fact it was quite comfortable. Though a large owl from a nearby tree fluttered away it broke the silence and his gaze with Toni. Sam watched the owl fly off and then looked back to Toni and gave her a small smile.
 
Toni keep her gaze on Sam even after the shirt comment was made. Yes she would have to hand over his shirt yet her eyes didn't want to look away. Look aside, Look away, Look anywhere but she thought but her thoughts were interupted by a sound. The slytherin looked to see what had made the sound when she noticed an owl. Smiling as she watched the owl for a moment, then Toni carefully took off Sam's now rather wet shirt. Bringing her gaze to him, for the first time in almost forever, Toni did not reach up to fix her hair. Instead she held the shirt in her right hand and her gaze on Sam.

"Here you are" She said finally as she handed the shirt back, her held tilted backwards to look at the darkening sky. once you are inside you can think about all this Toni thought not knowing if thinking was going to help or if it was just going to confuse this blonde girl more.

Bringing her gaze back to Sam she smiled softly. "So shall we" She said motioning her arm towards the castle as she took once step closer to it as well as one step closer in Sam's direction. Her heart was still pounding in her ears and Toni had basically given up trying to stop the noise. There was just no hope.
 
[Apoligies for the slight godmodding]

"Thanks..." Sam said slowly taking the shirt from her. He held it in his hand and didn't put it on instantly, when they were at the doors he would. But for now it would stay in his hand.

He nodded his head as Toni suggested that they go in. As she took a step towards him his heart thumped louder then it was originally, how could she not hear that? He asked himself. He then turned around to the castle and began to walk at first slowly so he could fall in line with Toni. He walked up to the castle wtih his hands in his pocket. If anyone saw him they would think he was very calm at the moment. When inside his stomach was feeling all fluttery and his heart was about to burst from his ribs.

Once they were at the castle he turned to Toni and smiled, just so there wouldn't be an awkward stare at each other. Sam then put his shirt on and while buttoning the buttons he said simply, "I'm glad I found you today." Sam wasn't sure if he was or not. If he didn't would these feelings still be there? Probably.. It was easier to tell her this as he was looking down but he knew that once he looked up again he would be back to his lameness, back to random-fish- comment-person.
 
((it's not a problem at all =) ))

Toni continued to walk side by side with Sam, her eyes flickering in his direction every now and then but for the most part she was able to keep her gaze right ahead of her. Her thoughts swirling and grasping around what this whole thing was. What she was feeling and more importantly why. This Slytherin began to twist the bracelet that was on her wrist memories coming back with a pang. How could she be over Beau so easily? Was it that she was over him or was it that she was never completely over Sam? Either way the answers didn't seem to matter. Toni knew how she was feeling. The worst part was that she didn't and was almost positive that Sam wasn't feeling the same way.

As they both reached the castle, Toni faced Sam making eye contact, which was probably the worst move this young girl could have done. Those butterflies fluttered about so much, Toni almost wondered if she was going to be physical sick. Keep yourself together She thought forcefully as a smile appeared on her face matching that of Sam's.

At Sam's comment a small touch of hope seemed to find it's way to Toni. Why was she hopeful. Maybe she believed that Sam actually liked her more than a friend. Don't be stupid She thought to herself reasoning that Sam was just glad that they met up so that they could catch up and hang out, as friends. "Yeah me too" Toni said wishing she had more to say. Why couldn't she think of something else something more intelligent.

"So umm" She paused the words not coming freely out of her mouth at first. Her eyes darting around the castle. "I should umm go" She said her eyes finally focusing on Sam once more. Why did she have to go? To clear her head and figure this all out would be the first reason. The second reason was she didn't want to make a complete fool of herself by saying something dumb. That would happen and Toni could feel the airness of her thoughtless thoughts coming to the surface ready to bubble over and make her look like a complete fool.
 
Sam couldn't wipe the smile off his face, especially as she said simply 'Yeah me too'. Those three words gave him a little bit of hope, maybe she was having these feelings too? But wouldn't that be a bad thing? He asked himself, Nothing can happen.

Sam nodded slowly, "Yeah.. okay." He didn't make a move to join her up to the castle. She didn't make a move either. Should he hug her? Yes, shes your friend act like it. He stepped forward closer to her, his heart thumping harder and faster with the step. He then moved his arms towards her and hugged her. His heart was thumping so hard that he hoped she wouldn't hear it, he doubted she could hear it though. People couldn't hear heartbeats..right?

He knew it was a bad mistake hugging her. He now didn't want to let her go. He could stay like this forever. Let her go! He reminded himself and he pulled away quickly. He looked at the ground below him, "I guess...I'll see you around?" He said slowly and quietly, then looked up to her beautiful eyes.
 
Toni wished her legs would just move. That would make things so much easier yet for some reason her legs didn't want to move. Was it that Toni didn't really want to go? She had to though, Toni knew this. Though as Sam stepped closer, Toni's head went completely out of control, beating so fast, she wasn't sure what to do about it. Reaching her arms around Sam in a hug that was supposed to be nothing but friendly. Relax Toni thought hoping her mind would listen.

As Sam let go, Toni always wished her hadn't. Looking down at the ground, she couldn't wipe the smile on her face. Though her eyes could not linger on the ground for long, Toni looked up seeing that Sam himself was also looking at the ground only for a second. Before long their eyes met as well. "Yeah I'll see you later" Toni said smiling as she turned around taking a deep breath, she walked off not daring to look back at Sam.
 
"See you later." He repeated slowly and quietly as she turned around to return to the castle. Once she was gone inside, Sam didn't know where to even begin on todays events. So he had 'feelings' for Toni? That may or may not be true. He thought, these 'feelings' could all just go away the next time he saw her.

Sam was beginning to feel a chill up his back which reminded him that he was still outside. He quickly shook his head and walked up the stone steps into the castle. He knew that he would not get an ounce of sleep tonight, that tonight would revolve around Toni. That thought excited him a little and a small smile crept on his face. Sam quitely closed the large doors behind him and headed up to the fourth floor corridor.


END OF THREAD
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Users who are viewing this thread

Total: 1 (members: 0, guests: 1)
Back
Top