Closed Casually Hanging Out

Jasper Night

Auror | Funny | Chaotic | 2054 Grad
 
Messages
1,285
OOC First Name
Daphne
Blood Status
Mixed Blood
Relationship Status
Married
Sexual Orientation
Straight (Nell)
Age
12/2035 (25)
Jasper was confused, pretty much constantly these days. He was trying his best to focus on other things than girls, but both Lily and Nell popped up in his head almost constantly. He'd kissed them both and he'd been at the dances with them as well. Did he like one of them? Both? Neither? Jasper didn't really know how to make sense of everything. Nell had told him that kissing was not a big deal, that it didn't have to mean anything special. It was similar to Sierra's attitude, but Jasper never really understood it. If it was no big deal, why did he keep thinking about it? The kiss with Nell had been strange, but nice. The one with Lily had felt nice too, the moment on top of the tower with the fireworks definitely more romantic. But did that mean he liked Lily more? Not necessarily. It was a mess.

Jasper decided to talk to Nell, as she seemed to be a sort of expert in this area. Apparently she had been kissing a lot of people, Jasper tried not to focus on how that made him feel, and would probably know how to tell if you actually liked someone. Especially since she had dated Selene before too, she would know the difference. He headed to the Hogwarts Monthly room and poked his head in. "Nell? fancy Miss editor?" He called out.
 
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Nell had never been more grateful for the Monthly before. The amount of work that went into putting together a paper was immense, but it was a good distraction from the troubles in her everyday life. She couldn't stress about her mixed feelings for Jasper when she was proofreading articles and rearranging photo layouts.

Or so she had thought, at least. She was in the middle of sorting through a fresh pile of photos when the door opened, face snapping into a nervous smile at the sight of the very person she had hoped to avoid thinking about. "Oh, hey!" Nell said a little too brightly. "What's up?"
 
Jasper was glad that Nell was there and also alone. It would be kind of awkward if some kid was hanging around when he wanted to have a serious conversation. Or, well, semi-serious. It was always easiest to joke around with Nell. Jasper walked over to her and sat down on her desk, looking at the photos she was sorting curiously as he swung his legs back and forth. "I was just bored." He lied. "And I figured you were being busy and nerdy and it was a good time to come interrupt you."
 
Nell snorted softly at Jasper's comment, pretending her heart hadn't skipped. "I'm being busy and cool, thank you very much." She said primly, shuffling all the photos back into one big pile and undoing all her work from the last ten minutes. "If you're looking to get an interview in the Monthly you're too late, the proposal would have had to be submitted to me weeks ago." She added with a small smile. "What's up?"
 
Jasper laughed. "You definitely look busy." He said, teasing her lightly. Jasper then laughed again as she joked about an interview, giving her a faux hurt look. "Please, Nell. You know you want an interview with the star of the Slytherin team." He told her, putting a hand on his heart dramatically. "Not much." He then said when she asked what was up, though he started fidgeting a little. "Just... uh, you know... you're pretty good at like, girl advice, right?"
 
Nell rolled her eyes at Jasper's teasing, but decided to leave it. She snorted with laughter at his next comment, raising one eyebrow. "I mean, it'd probably be good for the paper, but I'd rather eat rocks than interview Blake." She quipped back, hands still fidgeting with the now unorganised pile of photos. She glanced up at Jasper when he started to fidget too, raising one eyebrow. "Girl advice?" Nell thought she did a pretty good job of keeping her voice even, as her heart started to panic unbidden. Was he going to ask about the Yule Ball? They hadn't spoken about it since, but if Jasper had the same thoughts she did...
 
Jasper gasped at Nell's joke and kicked her lightly. "How dare you!" He said, though he then laughed as well. It was funny, he could admit. He wished he hadn't brought up girl advice, as it suddenly sounded kind of dumb to ask it like that, but... it's what he needed. "Yeah." He said, hesitating. "Like. The yule ball, right? You said kissing was not a big deal, right?" He asked her, annoyed at how uncertain his voice sounded. "So... how do you know when it is a big deal?" He asked, trying to sound casual.
 
Nell tried very hard to keep her face straight when Jasper mentioned the Yule Ball, but she wasn't sure she was doing a great job. "If you want to kiss me again you can just ask." She joked, though the second half of Jasper's question made her feel silly for joking. "Oh." Nell hesitated, desperately ignoring the thump of her own heart. "I mean, it's... a lot of stuff. Like... the way you think about the person, I guess. I don't have... Clifton or Syd swimming around my head the way.... Selene did, you know." Nell said hesitantly, hoping Jasper wouldn't pick up on how she sidestepped mentioning his own name.
 
Jasper pulled a face, though there was a part of him that really did want to kiss her again. That same part of him wasn't very pleased to hear her talk about kissing Clifton and someone named Syd, who he guessed was Sydney. That made him feel a little weird, knowing they'd kissed the same girl. "Right." Jasper said. And suddenly it felt very important that she knew he also kissed someone else. "I kissed Lily, and I guess you're right." He said with a shrug. "You can kiss friends without it being all weird."
 
Nell didn't know what she expected to hear, what she wanted to hear, but it... wasn't this. "Oh." She said softly, trying very hard not to imagine Jasper and Lily kissing. She supposed she shouldn't care. No. She shouldn't care. And Nell very much didn't think about why she did. "Well... yeah. That's how it works." She said slowly, looking down at the photos she was now shuffling idly in her hands. "So... yeah."
 
Jasper nodded, trying his best to feel relieved by her words. But he didn't. "Yeah, I guess so." He said, looking away. "So uh, Clifton and Sydney?" He asked her, unable not to prod a little, even though it hurt. "How'd that happen?"
 
Nell couldn't help a soft snort at Jasper's question, finally looking up slightly from her photos with an easier subject to talk about. "Oh Merlin... Clifton was a mistake, we were both just... bummed out. The less said about him the better." Nell rolled her eyes, flushing a little at the mention of Sydney. "Syd was just curious, it wasn't a big deal." She added, shifting a bit. "You know, we're friends, so why not?"
 
There was an awkwardness between them now, which frustrated Jasper. Though he couldn't help a laugh at Clifton's expense. "Never liked the guy." He said, feeling vindicated. He wrinkled his nose. "Sydney's my friend too, it's kind of weird." He admitted. "Do you kiss all your friends, then?"
 
Nell glanced at Jasper in surprise. "Oh, I didn't realise you knew Syd." She said, feeling a little guilty for talking about their kiss now. She didn't really mind talking about Clifton behind his back, but Nell didn't want to spread around information Syd wasn't comfortable with. She shrugged in response to his question, leaning back in her chair slightly. "I mean, the ones who want to kiss me, why not?" She said casually, unable to help a quick glance at Jasper's lips.
 
Jasper shrugged. "She's like one of the few cool Slytherins I know." He said, then paused. "Cool-ish." He added with a shrug. He frowned a bit. "I mean. I guess..." He said, not sure what to make of her statement. "But I don't think I want to kiss all my friends. Not even if they wanted to kiss me." He said, even though he'd kissed two of his closest friends so he wasn't sure if that was entirely true.
 
Nell snorted. "Glad you admit Slytherins are dorks." She teased. This agonising conversation just kept going though, and Nell shrugged slightly. "Well, you don't have to." She said casually, looking away from Jasper and trying to hide her disappointment. "Not everyone wants the same stuff."
 
Jasper sighed. "They're just dorks when compared to me, honestly." He teased back, trying to get back to their normal way of talking. But he could see there was something wrong, and he could feel it too. "Yeah, I guess." He said. "And if I do want to kiss... one or two, casually, that's fine. Right?"
 
Nell snorted and rolled her eyes at Jasper. "Like you're not the biggest dorkus in that house." She teased, relieved to be almost closer to their normal conversation. Almost. Her heart sank as Jasper continued the subject though, and she shrugged warily at his question. "It depends." Nell said slowly. "If it's an ongoing thing, you've got to make sure they know it's... you know, that you're not looking for a relationship, and they definitely need to know if there's more than one person. You know, there's a line between just being casual and... leading someone on, or cheating on someone who thought you were exclusive. Long as everyone wants the same thing and they're all on board, it's fine."
 
Jasper frowned at Nell. "You're friends with Sydney, you know I'm not the biggest dorkus in that house." As Nell went on, he nodded but felt a little uncomfortable. it sounded tricky, having to... talk about that stuff. As far as he knew, Lily was fine with just kissing. But should he bring up that he kissed Nell too? But he kissed Nell before Lily, so surely not. He had no idea, but he also didn't want to ask Nell. So he shrugged. "Yeah, sure. I guess you're the expert."
 
Nell snorted at Jasper's comment. "Syd's definitely cooler than you, sorry." She teased, relieved at least part of the conversation wasn't so heavy. She tried to lighten the tone, looking at Jasper again and wiggling her eyebrows. "So, you got two girls on the go?" Nell asked cheekily, though she really didn't want the answer. This was all much too difficult.
 
Jasper groaned. "She's not and you know it!" He said, a little annoyed but also trying not to smile. He flushed when Nell asked him, then shook his head. "I don't ... think so." He admitted. "I kissed you. I kissed Lily, and then kissed Lily a bit more and that's it." He said. "It's not nearly as uh, varied as with you." Thankfully, because this was confusing enough.
 
This whole conversation Jasper had been confusing Nell more and more, and her heart sank as he finally actually explained the situation. "Right..." She said slowly, trying to keep her voice steady. "So... you like Lily but you're... feeling guilty about it because we kissed?" She asked slowly, staring at the photos in her hand again. Tyler Lee's face looped in front of her, silently mouthing some ascerbic remark about trampolines. How had things gone so wrong? The whole point had been to protect herself, to avoid getting into a situation like she had been in with Selene, where her heart was exposed to be broken. How had Jasper managed to stumble his way past her defenses to let Nell down yet again?
 
Jasper faltered and rubbed his face. "Well, no." He said. "You said you can want to kiss people without liking them. I like Lily like... the same as I like you. We're friends who have kissed." He said, nodding to himself. "I don't feel guilty. You said it's not a big deal, so why should I?" He asked, looking confused.
 
Nell's face twisted in discontent as Jasper spoke. It was true, Nell's whole goal was not to get attached. Keep things casual. She really didn't want to think about why this conversation was upsetting her so much, why hearing Jasper say he liked her and Lily the same stung. "You asked me about this!" She protested, trying to keep her feelings off her face. "You asked me how you tell if you like someone as more than just... a casual thing. I thought you were saying it was serious!"
 
Jasper frowned at Nell. "Yeah, because you're like the expert of kissing people you're friends with without it getting weird." He said quickly. "I asked so I could make sure I wasn't serious, and I'm not. I think about kissing Lily about as much as I think about, well, kissing you." He said with a shrug. "So it's clearly no big deal."
 

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