What Happened To You?

[Sara Moon]

Sara ran, her heels weren't exactly the proper attire, but she wanted to get away from the castle. She had no homework, and no study to do. Everyone was leaving, everyone. Stefan was gone, and she missed him. He was one of her closest friends, and he's disappeared. He'd gone, left them, and she knew he had his reasons, but it hurt. She had no idea how it must feel for Kate. Then Jake had disappeared, she hadn't seen him in months and she missed him. She hadn't seen Dante or Willow in months. Her friends were her family now, since her and Kate had fallen apart. She'd never been particularly close to Star-she loved her sister, but Star was quiet and couldn't really handle Sara. She'd always been close to Ryan, he'd been her partner in crime. She was very close to her parents, and things between her and Kate were good now. Though Ryan had cut himself off completely. He barely spoke to any of them anymore. she'd seen him around the school. He'd changed completely. his hair had grown lighter, and he'd grown taller. He used to look like Sara, but now him and Star actually looked like twins. The same was true with Sara herself. She looked much more like Kate than she used to. Her hair had darkened, and her tan had evened out a bit, rather than changing completely every season. It was disconcerting, changing, looking different. She looked in the mirror now, and sometimes wished she could see the little girl who had come to Hogwarts originally. The girl who had her future in front of her, who had new friends to make. The girl who was close to her family, who knew what her place in the world. Why did everything have to change?

Then, at other times, she was glad, glad that her life had changed. She didn't really miss the closeness with her sister-they'd smothered each other. Their personailities just didn't suit, but Ryan...Ryan was different. He'd been her brother, her friend, and she really missed him. she missed the old him, the one who she'd been protective of, the boy who's played guitar, annd had one of the purest hearts she knew. She knew that he sometimes resented being put in Slytherin. She often wondered if things would've been different if he'd been in one of the other three houses. She was walking along the lawn, and her heels were sinking into the grass. It was extremely irritating, so she leant down and pulled them off. They were nice shoes, she'd bought them over the Summer. The sun was high in the sky, and there was a pleasant breeze blowing. The sun was extremely hot, and she was glad she'd worn a light skirt. Her hair was down, and straightened. She felt light and airy, perfectly content, with the weather at least. Once she reached the cliffs, she placed her shoes about a metre away from the cliffs, and took a seat, with her legs hanging over the egde, and she kicked out into the sun. She rocked forward and back,not worried at all, there would be enchantments on the cliffs so that she could not fall and die. The day made her feel like singing, and she began. She hadn't practiced as she should, and her singer teacher would be annoyed. It was one of her favourite songs;

Looking into your eyes
Is like watching the night sky,
Or a beautiful sunrise.
There's so much they hold.

And you're just like them old stars.
I can see that you've come so far,
To be right where you are.
How old is your soul?

................
​

 

[Ryan Moon]

Ryan was lurking down at the dungeons.It's what he did most days unless he was playing his music.He had his guitar with him though.He couldn't bring his electric one with him as the speakers never worked so it was never good trying to practice.He couldn't really take all his anger out on his favorite guitar though,that would be unfair to his guitar though sometimes he felt like smashing it into a wall.He always had this anger running through him deep under the surface.At times he just felt like screaming at everyone to just leave him alone.It did work though he didn't talk to anyone except for that Jenette girl.When Danielle had come back things had gone a bit better for him,he had remembered what his old life had been like.How happy he had been but then Danielle was taken from him,left him and now he was all alone again and even more angry at the world for taking one of the only people who could help him away from him.He didn't talk to his family anymore.there constant worrying drove him up the wall,he saw why Kate starved herself and ignored them back when he was in first year.Sometimes he felt like starving himself or just doing something more radical.It was a dangerous way of living but so what?Not like anyone gave a damn.Well maybe Star would,she had tried talking to him a few times as had Sara,he hadn't seen Kate much but he knew she had enough on her plate.But he didn't care what they wanted.He just wished they would get it through their thick heads that he didn't want help,this was who he was.The hat had put him in Slytherin for a reason and he was just being what the hat had predicted her'd be.They would just have to learn that this was the way life was going to be.He wasn't going to go to any of the stupid classes,if he could run away like that Stefan fella did he would do it any day but he knew he wasn't up for it.They'd find him anyways,his parents were rich and he was sure if worst came to worst they would take down the whole of New Zealand to find him.He wouldn't be bothered going to that much effort anyways.He was fine her,skipping classes,playing his guitar and drums and lurking.It wasn't such a bad way to live,the only problem was the constant anger inside him.Anger at the stupid jerks who had caused him to turn like this.Sometimes he felt like finding them and beating them up like they did to him.

Ryan shook his head and walked out of the dungeons.He wasn't cold,he hadn't gotten used to the permanent chill down there.When he waslked outside the sun was shinning but it made no difference to him.He had changed a lot over the past three years,he was now towering over his three sisters,his hair had gotten fairer and for once he and Star actually looked like twins but Ryan didn't consider her his twin,he didn't consider any of them family.They were just the annoying people he lived with.Nothing to be done about them really he just wished Star would stop trying to talk to him.Deep down it hurt him so much to see her hurting like that.But he was too selfish and stubborn to go back on what he had done over the past three years.It would take a lot more then his sister crying to get him to change.Ryan sighed and continued walking.His head was really missed up he didn't know how he was feeling most days.Sometimes he missed his family and other days he hated them so much.It was confusing but there was one thing that he always felt and that was anger.Anger at everything in the world.It was almost draining being so angry all the time.But it was there all the time none the less.It was why he locked himself in his room and playing his music.It helped him release some of the anger inside him.

As he walked closer to the cliffs he thought about the sister who he was most like.Sara and he had always gotten into mischief together.It had been Star and Kate who had prevented them from taking the whole place down around them.They had been good times but of course things could never go back to the way they were.Too much had happened to the Moon family for things to ever go back as they were.It was simply impossible.First of all they were living in England,they were magical,Kate and Sara aren't as close,Kate looks like a branch,he himself is just cut himself off and Star and Sara are upset with him.He wondered how his parents did it and what they thought of everything.He was surprised that they hadn't taken all the Moon's out of Hogwarts yet.Ryan was almost at the cliff,he walked the steep slope up to the cliff slowly.One thing that really bothered Ryan was that he didn't know how he was.He had once been protective,kind,funny and a cool brother now he was completely different.As much as he would like to think that how he was acting now was the real him,he just wasn't sure if it was because of the bullying or the fact he had been put in the Slytherin house that had made him change.It was a complicated question and one he didn't want to answer at the moment.He sat down by the tree and leaned against it,holding his guitar on top of him.He was quiet for a while,just listening to the sea and trying to calm down the anger rumbling inside him.As he sat there he heard someone singing.The voice sounded vaguely familiar but Ryan wasn't sure,he did recognize the song though.His fingers absent-mindedly began strumming the chords to the song and he began to sing quietly,

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up

And when you're needing your space
To do some navigating
I'll be here patiently waiting
To see what you find

'Cause even the stars they burn
Some even fall to the earth
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it
No, I won't give up

 

[Sara Moon]

Sara knew that running and hiding from the world wasn't exactly the most mature option, but it sure felt good. The breeze against her face, the cool air drawing ehr in. The sun, tickling her skin, golden under its light. It was when she was alone that she allowed herself to ponder. sometimes it helped, sometimes it didn't. She didn't really miss her past, it had happened, and now it was over, still she liked to think about it. She loved remembering their old house, the way she used to curl up in front of the fire, and read a book. the way, when they were small, their Father used to let them crawl all over him, and tickle him. He never complained, and laughed along with them. Her Mother used to worry, saying "Thomas-make sure they don't fall!" she cared about them so much, and though she could be over-protective, and old-fashioned, Sara loved her. She missed them both so much when she was at school, and with her Father's business, her schoolwork, and her Mother's constant activity-they rarely wrote. She didn't know about the others, though she was sure that Ryan didn't contact their parents. She frowned at the thought of Ryan. That idiot could do with a right talking to! Star was out of her mind with worry, and Sara had tried to talk sense to him, it was at times like this that all she wanted to do was let loose her temper, explode the way she used to....but was it right? Would it really help? It hadn't helped with Stefan, but Stefan and Ryan were very different people. Maybe it would work with him?


She just didn't know what to do with herself anymore. when she was younger, her role had been the defender. She'd have defended her family, or her friends until she died. She still would, but she felt as though she'd changed, and she didn't know if it was for the best. Sure, she was more confident now, but had she lost her spark, her bang, the thing that made her who she was? Her mind was in turmoil, and she didn't know who to turn to. She'd lost her circle, those people in her life who made it worth living. It was all her own fault. She'd become so absorbed in studying and exams, and she'd lost sight of them. It was as though she'd been blind in some way, but now that she could see, there was nothing to look at.
She was letting herself get melancholy, and she blamed her brother. He'd left her, she'd talked to him, she'd pleaded with him! She'd begged, and God only knew how she could lower herself to begging! How dare he? He knew how concerned everyone was with Kate's illness, and yeah, that had taken some attention away from him, and his precious problems over being in Slytherin, but he should've dealt with it! Why had he changed, it was as though it had happened overnight, and it wasn't good enough. They had no reason, no understanding why he'd changed. He just had.

She heard another voice join hers. whoever it was, was a good guitarist. She rose to look for them, singing along with them, it was a male voie. Perhaps someone she could recruit to Glee Club? They needed more guys. She smiled at the thought. She'd neglected Glee slightly this year, becaus eof exams, but she was hell bent on making it better next year. She turned a corner, and saw the other singer. She froze, continuing to sing, but more quietly. It was her brother. Well, he wasn't going to make her stop this song halfway through. Her voice grew more angry, loud toward the end of the section she sang as she glared at the boy who had changed everything. the boy, who even as she was hating him, she loved him more than anyone. He was her brother. It was her job to help him, and she'd failed;
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I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend
For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not
And who I am

<FONT font="Comic Sans MS">She held the last note, and walked forward toward Ryan, sitting beside him and avoiding his gaze. she would finish the song, it would give her time to figure out how to deal with him. the next few lines applied to him, so she sang them loud and clear;


I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
Still looking up.

 

[Ryan Moon]

Ryan had nearly always been the peacemaker at home.Three girls are not easy to live with especially with such different personalities there was some clashes between them all,that always needed someone neutral to help sort things out.Since Ryan was the only boy that usually meant he was the only one not fighting and the one who would have to figure it out.He hadn't minded doing that,he was just glad when they would finally forgive each other and everything would be back to normal.He hadn't liked conflict when he was younger.Everyone would be fighting and angry and he would just hate it all.It was so annoying and loud and down right frustrating.Family was supposed to get along and not fight and love each other everyday and not fight over stupid things like who did this and that.Ryan didn't really see it that way anymore.He found family more of a hindrance then anything else.Always so nosy,wanting to know everything and anything .Never giving anyone a chance to have anything private.Ever since Kate got sick the Thomas and Sophie Moon had been even more inquisitive as to what was happening in the Moon's life.Ryan's change happened the year after Kate's first sickness,his parents had practically held an inquisition as to why he was acting the way he was.That hadn't been a good idea because it had made Ryan even more angry and strengthened his resolve not to say anything.At first he had been depressed and upset because he was bullied,naturally you aren't going to feel peachy but when the bullies had left,his hurt and sadness had turned to anger with the help of his parents and annoying twin.Sara and Kate had been fighting at that time so they had been a bit busy but once things leveled out between the two,they had started also and it had just driven him mad.He could almost feel Star's despair that he wouldn't talk to her,left her alone with no friends.Wasn't his fault she couldn't make any friends,he wasn't going to be there always.Then Kate had gotten sick again and attention had been taken off him which had given him a chance to breath.

The only time Ryan's resolve wavered a bit was when Sara or Star came to him.That was when he would have to be his most selfish and stubborn because ,seeing them so upset had stirred something inside him but he had been quick to forget about it.Pretend that it hadn't happened but it came back to him sometimes.He didn't like it when it did,so he usual started banging on his drums,trying not to think.He heard the other voice join in and he hoped they didn't come over and talk to him.He would just get up and walk away if they did.Ryan was in no mood to talk,he hated everyone in the school anyways.He continued strumming the chords and he didn't notice the voice get quieter.When it came to music Ryan didn't notice anything but the music.It was only when someone sat beside him did he notice the fact they had steadily got closer.He almost jumped because he hadn't realize how close the person had gotten and he was about to get up and leave when he notice who it was.She had changed a lot,almost looked like Kate now.When she sang the last words he guessed they applied to him.Ryan felt a surge of anger.He wanted her to just give up and leave him alone.He didn't need anyones help,this was the way he was living.It was his life his choice,none of theirs.Ryan stood up angrily,taking the guitar with him and started walking down from the cliff

 

[Sara Moon]

Sara knew Ryan had his reasons, she just wished she new what they were. Why couldn't he talk to her. when he was a kid, she'd adored him, as a toddler, she used to follow her Mam around when she was feeding him or looking after him. She'd always wantedd a brother. They'd caused mishief together, and hidden in the garden from thei parents. When she was teased by other kids for being different, she used to play with Ryan, playstation, card-whatever he wanted. Being around him made her feel better. It hurt that he didn't think he could turn to her. She couldn't look after him any more, he was tall and strong, and grown up, but he needed his famiy, now more than ever, and yes, she should've been there when it started. It had been a mistake to focus on that rubbish with Kate, but he'd never even given them a clue as to what was going on. She longed for the days when they'd watched movie's together-all four of them. She used to try and tie up Ryan's hair when they were little kids, and her and Kate ha dplayed make-up with him-which he had anjoyed immensely. He'd looked like a clown by the end, but he was smiling and clapping. She just wished she could go back. Seeing him now, was killing her. She cared about her brother, and he'd destroyed himself, destroyed the loving, caring boy he'd been and repaced it with this stone.

As she stood behind him, she wondered whether she realised who it was, whether he even recognised his own sister's voice. She remembered him learning to play guitar, remembered how he used to sing around the house, along with the rest of them, often Star didn't join in, though she had quite a nice voice. The boy in front of her wasn't her brother. He wasn't the person she loved nd cared about. He was a shell, a shell of his former self. She wasn't going to let him do it, she wasn't going to let him continue. She worked ehrsef up to a suitable level of anger, before she sat beside him. Her eyes were burning, and part of the old Sara had returned. As she finished the song she watched him stand and walk away, as quick as a flash she was up afer him, and grabbed his arm, whirling him around. "Don't you dare Ryan Moon-don't you bl00dy dare!" she threatened, tiny beside him, but she felt powerful, her anger fuelling her resolve; "I am so sick of your Sh!t!" she cursed, she didn't usualy, but the occasion seemed to suit it; "And you are not going to walk away from me Rayn, or I swear you will regret it." she growled, completely serious. "Why did this happen-why did you change and don't give me and rubbish about Not wanting to talk to me, because you don't have a choice in the matter." she was breathing heavily, and fire burned in her eyes, fire that she'd tried so hard to put out.

 

[Ryan Moon]

Ryan hadn't told a soul about what happened during his second year.No one but himself and the three Slytherins who had no left the school knew fully what happened.Sure some Slytherins had seen the bullying but had they done anything?No,he would have been surprised if someone had helped him and maybe if they had he wouldn't be the way he was now.It was during the bullying that Ryan had lost contact with most of his new friends and his family.He had made quite a bunch of friends before entering Hogwarts.Though there still had been some drama between them all he had still made a group of friends and he had had an amazing girlfriend.But he hadn't had the guts to tell them during second year what was wrong.He was too embarrassed.He had seen the look of shock on their faces when he was put into Slytherin and the smirk on Isobel's face.His face most have been shocked also because that was the last house he would have ever expected to get into.If anyone had known Ryan before hand they would know,how Slytherin would have been the most unlikely house for him.But the hat had made it's decision and it had proved right.Ryan was selfish,stubborn,rude and a total @ss.Aspects that came to mind when he thought of a Slytherin.He knew that wasn't being fair because not everyone in Slytherin was that way and there were some rude,stubborn and selfish people in other houses but Ryan just assosiated those characteristics with a Slytherin because that was what his bullies had been and what he himself was now.

Ryan could sense Sara's anger building.He had always known this confrontation would be one of the ugliest.Lately he begun to think Star may shriek and attempt to throw a punch at him because of the way he treated her.But he could easily over power her.He had grown very tall over the past three years.He was nearly the same size as his dad.You wouldn't think he was fourteen but he was none the less.Even as he was sitting his was much taller then Sara.She had always been the smallest in the family.The three girls were much smaller then him but Kate was the tallest of the three.Star and Sara were around the same size.When Ryan and Star were beside each other you would think he was her older brother by much more years.Even though they had grown more alike.the size difference was a big put off.When Ryan felt him being pulled back,a new surge of energy overcome her.He towered over Sara and he knew if he wanted he could crush her but the rational side of him knew that that would be way too far and there would be no going back if he even attempted to crush Sara.He would be no better then his bullies either who had chosen him because he was a muggle-born and small. Ryan watched as she had her angry out burst,his anger was building every moment "Are you now,well frankly I don't care"He said sarcastically glaring at his older sister.Who did she think she was,the way she was acting "It's none of your damn business and I do have a choice because you can't make me tell you"He said his temper matching hers. "Just watch me walk away"He said turning and storming down the hill.He needed to control his anger or he was going to do something he would regret.He clenched his fists and continued walking down the hill

 

[Sara Moon]

Sara knew Ryan hated being in Slytherin. She'd have thought he'd be a Gryffindor, but somehow it had turned out different. She still loved Ryan, but she didn't particularly like him at the moment. He was trying to pretend he didn't care, but it was a poor facade. She knew Ryan, and she knew he didn't really want to be alone. He'd never been like this before. What had happened to his friends-to Danielle? He used to be so popular, so happy, and now he was empty and sad. She missed him. She hated what he had become, and she thought he hated it too. She knew that she could help him, but to do that-she had to hurt him. She really didn't want to do that, and it hurt her to imagine hurting him, saying the things that needed to be said. Kate wouldn't do it, and Star couldn't, so once more she had to shout and get angry. Tears formed at the edges of her eyes as she realised what she had to do, and as Ryan spoke to her, sarcastic and cold, she became determined.

"You don't know what you've done." she replied, coldly as he began to walk away. She pulled out her wand, and ran after him, jumping up on his back and tackling him to the ground, where she sat on him, and pointed her wand in his face; "Think carefully before you act Ryan-you're up against a powerful witch, who is older than you-you can't reach your wand, so you'd better start talking." she snarled, every word hurting her to the core; "You are my brother, whether you like it or not, and I am not going to stand by and watch you turn into a rock, I don't like it, and I'm not going to let it happen." she continued,he was much stronger than her, but she had him under her thumb, a few well-chosen words from her and he wouldn't be able to move; "Now, we are either going to have a mature, adult conversation about this, or I'm going to be forced to hex you." she threatened; "Your choice." She stared straight into his eyes and said; "Your move....bro."

 

[Ryan Moon]

Ryan wasn't a very lovable person which was the whole point.He didn't want to seem aproachable but yet some people ignored his cold exterior and still tried to talk to him like that Sammy kid.Kaster seemed to have managed to meet all the Moon's which was quite impressive.Soon his sisters would be inviting him over to England for the holidays or something like that.Ryan just hoped that never happened the kid was practically the opposite of him.Ryan always looked ta the negatives while Kaster seemed to look at all the positives.It was annoying and Ryan was afraid the positiveness would rub off on him which he didn't want.He liked the fact his current behavior was annoying and worrying his family.He didn't liked them and he loved seeing them at a loss with him.Even though he hated who he ws it did give him satisfaction.Ryan had finished his first song the other day.The song was basically his life story since second year.He was proud of it since it had taken him three years to get fully right.It was his way of expressing how he felt and even though he probably wouldn't sing it for his family for a long time,he still had the option with out getting tongue tied.

Really Ryan should have expected that she wouldn't give up.It was Sara for God's sake but he had been out of the picture he had forgotten how stubborn she could be and how angry she could get.When she tackled him to the ground she had the element of surprise s he couldn't get his wand out and when he was about to protect himself and throw her off she had her wand pointed at him.He hoped his guitar was okay because if she had broken it,he was going to get angry.At the moment he could feel it digging into his back.Ryan's anger was building because he was trapped and couldn't do anything.How he hated his sister. "Get off me"He snarled trying to push her off.He was tempted to say Hex me so because he still had the power,he could be very stubborn when he wanted to and all he had to do was not say a thing and he would win.He didn't want to admit to his weakness.He glared at her and hate was pouring out of her.He just lay there not doing anything.Waiting to see what she would do.

 

[Sara Moon]

Sara had never felt the need toprove herself within her family. She did well, and made them proud, but she'd never felt she had to stand up to her siblings. She'd never thought she have to stand up to Ryan of all people. She'd always thought she'd have to look after him, never hurt him. She frowned to herself at the thought. She'd always needed to prove herself to other people. She'd always needed to seem alright, settled, but had never really felt it. She'd wanted to seem as though she had everything together, but she didn't. However, she'd come to be more confident. She trusted herself, even liked herself now. She had to force herself not to smile at the thought. It was an inappropriate time, but she felt good in herself. This whole problem with Ryan just messed everything up.

She continued to sit on him, smirking as he told her to move; "We couldn't have that now could we, I've finally caught your attention after months of trying to make you feel better." she growled, still holding her wand firmly. "Ryan-I promise that I won't try to force you to change back-we've all changed, Kate changed because of her illness, I changed because I sort of...drifted for a while, Star changed because her twin abandoned her." she stated simply; "I'm not going to try and get back the brother I had, even though I fully believe he's still in there somewhere, I just want to understand why he changed, and that's all." she added; "I just want to know why this has happened." she finished, speaking very clearly, and calmly, a good siguise for the anger bubbling inside her. "Dammit Ryan-this whole thing is so messed up!" she burst, belting the ground beside him. She resisted his struggling, and just pointed her wand at him, his arms were pinned to his sides by her weight.

 

[Ryan Moon]

Ryan had always been comfortable around people.He had always been the cool dude.He had found it easy to make friends,be sociable and be good around people.He found it easy to make small chat and was great at parties because he could talk to anyone and he would generally get the room to start talking and start getting people to talk to each other so there was a genuinely comfortable and had a relaxed feeling but those skills were long gone.He was quiet the opposite now.It's not that he had lost the skills,he just didn't want to use them and he didn't see the need to use them.He would probably be great at taking over his Dad's business,in terms of socializing with clients or what ever the hell he did.Ryan hadn't really gone into the details.Pursuing his Father's career was not something Ryan had in mind.What ever his profession was going to be,it was going to be something involved in music.Maybe he would start up a band.The idea had occured to him a few times.He had never been one to think about his future but now as he got older,the notion did pop into his head a lot more.

Ryan wanted to snarl at her and hurl abuse at her but he knew he was cornered.The wind started to get stronger and he felt the paper in his pocket begin to fall out of his pocket.Ryan tried to keep his calm.If that piece of paper blew away he could actually lose it but he didn't want to say anything as then Sara would get it and read it and she would know the reasons to his change.See he didn't want them to understand.He didn't want their pity,their sympathy.He almost flinched when she belted the ground beside him.She pointed her wand back at him again.He had decided silence was the best policy in this situation.Suddenly a burst a wind,caught the paper in his pocket and it blew out "Sh!t"He said as he struggled to move his hand so he could catch it

 

[Sara Moon]

Sara frowned down at her brother, she felt like she barely knew him anymore. He'd never been interested in money, or wealth, Ryan had always been more of a people person, but obviously he wasn't now. "Oh Ryan, you're so stubborn!" she sighed, a small smile playing on her lips; "I know that's kind of a case of the pot calling the kettle black, but still...." she continued, still pointing her wand at him. It felt wrong to be holding her brother at ransom like this, but in a way, it was a type of preparation for being an auror, even if the Dark Wizards he faced would be far more dangerous. She looked into his eyes, they were exactly the same. It didn't make sense, surely they'd be different if he was different.

His exclamation caught her attention, and she twisted her head, slightly, keeping one eye on him. A piece of paper. "Accio Paper." she whispered, the summoning spell was one of her specialities. The paper flew over to her, and she caught it in her left hand, reading it quickly, while keeping her wand pointed at Ryan. What she read turned her face an ashen grey colour. "You were bullied." she stated sadly, she knew what it felt like. She'd been bullie din muggle school. She slapped him on the arm; "Why didn't you tell someone Ryan?" she demanded, growing upset, tears were forming in her eyes. "All this time, you've just bottled it up!" She'd done the exact same thing when she was bullied, she'd craved their approval. She took her wand away from Ryan's face, to wipe the tears from her eyes.

 

[Ryan Moon]

"I learned from the best"He said between gritted teeth.His patience was on it's last straw.He was going to explode soon even with the wand pointed at his face.His anger tolerance had grown thin after the past years.He was not the calm man he used to be.He would be the one to start arguments these days.He was just so bitter all the time.He was just fed up with his life,he wanted it to be over and done with.He wanted all these people out of his life.He hated not being able to move his arm.It gave him an uncomfortable feeling and he felt trapped and he felt panic rising inside him.His movements were more jerky and more urgent.He really did not like being able to move his hands "Get off me Sara,please"He even added at the end of his sentence,real urgency in his voice this time.

Ryan watched in almost slow motion as he saw Sara get the page and begin reading.How different things were going to be from now on now that Sara knew.Of course she was going to tell his parents and his life was going to be hell for the next few weeks.He felt like crying,all his coldness and everything for nothing.Why did he have to bring that song with him this morning. "Well done Sara"He said sarcastically,his voice laced with venom.Why did she had to be so noise.Why couldn't they have left him along. "Because I didn't want to and I didn't want your sympathy"He shouted " "I've always been the cool person,the one who makes friends easily and I didn't want you to know I was bullied because I was embarrassed"He said his voice getting louder as he talked.Everything else was coming out now that she knew about the bulling. "Why are you crying?"He asked angrily.If anyone should be crying it should be him. "Sorry for hurting your precious feelings"He said sarcastically again trying once more to get her off him.

 

[Sara Moon]

Sara laughed at his reply; "That's more like it Ryan!" she laughed, glad to see ome fire bck in him. He'd been so cold and distant, but that kind of comment didn't hurt her, it reminded her of all the petty arguments they had, all of them, and how they'd tease each ther. It was odd, but she really missed that. She considered his plea for a moment, tapping her finger against her chin; "Promise you won't run off?" she asked, grinning, but she got off him anyway. If she didn't trust him, he'd never trust her again, and more than anything she wanted her brother back. She'd become more confident with who she was in the last year, but she was starting to doubt herself again. She didn't know if she was the same person she used to be, and she didn't know how to act any differently. Ryan's distance had just confused her more, and she needed to fix this if she could ever get ahead with her own life. sometimes she just wished she could back off, and leave everyone alone, she could if he wanted to, but she cared too much.

Sara frowned as she read the page, and looked back up at Ryan, who used her signature phrase; "Hey! I taught you that phrase-you cannot use it against me." she replied, trying to ease the tension; "On another note-this song is good." she commented, reading through it again. She then handed it back to Ryan. She wiped her eyes and looked up at him again, a frown creasing her forehead. "I'm crying, because my little brother has been going through all this alone, my little brother who is supposed to be able to talk to us, who I love and care about it-even if he hasn't been acting like himself recently!" she answered, and she continued; "Do you really think I don't know what it feels like? I've been there Ryan, I was younger, yes, and the bullies weren't as cruel, but I know what it feels like to feel inadequate and empty. I know what it's like to crave someone's approval, even though they make you feel like sh!t!" All of this came out in a rush, and she beat the ground, angry now, rather than upset. "And this is why you've been acting weird, this is why you've been a different person." she whispered. "We were all so caught up in ourselves we didn't notice." she continued, but that wasn't true. Kate had been ill, and Star had noticed, but hadn't known what to do. It was her fault, she should've noticed, but she was so caught up in herself that she'd pushed him away, just as he'd pushed her. "It was me." she whispered, almost silently, as she realised this.

 

[Ryan Moon]

Sara's laughing nearly threw him over the edge.He was doing his best to get his cold distant self back but he was too panicked about the fact he couldn't move.He almost felt as everything was closing in on him and it was making him uncomfortable.It was also making it harder for him be his new self.His old self was coming to the surface and he could see Sara had noticed it too. "I promise,just get off me"He said and got up quickly when sh got off him.He breathed for a few moments and swung his hands around,glad that he could now move them. He just stood there for a few moments,making sure the uncomfortable feeling was gone and that he no longer felt as if everything was going to crush into him.He wasn't sure what he was going to do now,he wanted to be as far away as possible from here but he couldn't just leave things like this,plus she had that blasted song which he was tempted to throw over the cliffs so he would never have to see it again.But that was all his life over the past three years,all his feelings in one song and he knew he would never be able to write something like that again.No matter how much he hated it,it still meant everything to him and he would always keep it.

Ryan took the page,folded it and put it back into his pocket,pushing it down to the end so the wind wouldn't pull it back out again and ruin his life again. "Well it looks like I just did"He said the smallest of smiles on his lips but it soon changed to his usual sullen look.Just because she knew what had happened to him,didn't mean he had to change,he could still live this way of life even though he knew his parents were gonna be down on him like a tonne of bricks.No matter how hard he tried things were going to change and his parents were going to make sure of it.Ryan looked down at his feet as she talked,,he had never really wanted approval off the bullies because he had hated them so much but he had felt everything else,it brought back unpleasant memories,memories he wanted to forget.Ryan shook his head,trying to almost shake the memories from his mind,he never wanted to see them or relive them again.Ryan looked up when she finally came to her conclusion.It wasn't totally her fault-his family had been all thinking about themselves that year,well Sara and Kate had been in the limelight.Kate being ill and everything and then Sara and Kate not getting on and what not.Star had tried to help but she couldn't.Nobody had noticed until everything had died down and they couldn't help but notice the fact he had changed. "Yeah well,you and Kate kinda had everyone's attention for a while so no one noticed me"He muttered,kicking the ground with his foot. He then looked up "So yeah you could say it was Kate's fault for totally over -reacting over that boy,you could blame you for only noticing your own problems and Kate's,you could blame Star for not telling anyone or you could blame our parents for only noticing Kate's problem and your own"He said looking at her squarely in the eyes "But none of that matters because it's all over and done with,I'm who I am now"He said folding his arms.He had realized some time ago,being unnoticed was how Star felt most of the time.Thinking back on life,no one had really noticed her.She had always been quiet and unnoticable and he doubted his parents knew how little friends she had or the fact that she was really smart and beautiful but as far back as he remembered,not many people had told her that.He himself hadn't even done it much and it was his fault she was so upset now. "You and Kate have always gotten the attention"He said,his voice neutral,because it wasn't their fault.What had happened had happened but it had had an affect on himself and Star

 

[Sara Moon]

Sara got off Ryan, leaning back into the grass, and supporting herself on her elbows. She still held her wand. She watched a Ryan moved around. He really had grown, he was really more of a grown man than boy anymore. It was a sad thought, he wasn't the happy-go-lucky boy he used to be. In a way, Sammy reminded her of how he used to be, of how happy he used to be. Ryan wouldn't like hearing that she could imagine. Now he was...cold. It was weird, before, that wouldn't have been a word she associated with Ryan. Her Mam had been frantic with worry about Ryan. At least she knew she'd tried, at least she knew she was making some sort of progress. He was talking to her right? That was a big step between her and Ryan. At least now she knew what was wrong, but she couldn't treat him like some kind of invalid. It would just make things worse.

She smiled in response, but frowned as Ryan's face turned stoney. "Oh Ryan, you make a rubbish bad-guy. You're too nice, just let all this go, please. It's not convincing. I know you, and I know no matter how much you pretend-you'd prefer it if things were different." she sighed, getting up. He towered above her now-another new development. "I miss you Ryan." she said honestly, sadly. He'd always been the one she teamed up with. She felt like a spare part. As he began talking, she nodded. she wasn't going to contradict him, not now, not when he was finally opening up. "Right on every point Ryan-except one." she replied, touching his arm; "This isn't who you are, and this isn't who you want to be, and if you keep this up-they've won." she reasoned, her voice soft now; "If you let, what they did, change you, then you're giving up, and you have never been a quiter." she finished, with a sigh, moving away from him, and raising her hands to her face. this conversation was emotionally draining. She was exhausted. His comment caught her attention though; "I guess you're right, I mean, when me and Kate came to Hogwarts, it was all new, whereas when you guys did, it wasn't as huge. I'm sorry Ryan, we never tried to make life hard for you and Star." she apologized, looking at the ground.