Time Can Change Me

[Sara Moon]

Sara strolled out to the lawn, her leather jacket kept her quite warm, and anyway-she didn't mind the cold. She'd grown used to it in Ireland, where is got much colder during the Winter. Still, it was better to be safe. There was snow on the ground, and she kicked at it, smiling as it flew into the air. It was easier when she was alone easier to remember how happy she used to be, with simple things like snow. It was out on this lawn, when there was snow on the ground that Jake had asked her to be his girlfriend. It had been morning then, and the evening was closing in now. The grounds were deserted. Dinner had just finished, and most people were still inside, but Sara had left the Hall, wanting to spend some time outside. She missed being sure about who she was, what she wanted. She'd been so sure of her future, and now she was in a rut. She didn't know what she could do to fix things. Her family wouldn't let it go. They were worried about her, she understood that, but she needed to have a little space from everything. She needed to figure out what she could do with her life, how she'd survive without the dream of becoming an auror.

She walked over to a tree, and sat down beneath it. The bark was rough underneath her fingers, and the snow was freezing, but she was beyond caring. Her life was lying in pieces around her, and she couldn't fix it. Every time something had gone wrong in the past, she'd fixed it. Why couldn't she do that now? She'd wanted this for so long. It just seemed impossible that it would never happen. She covered her face with her eyes, wishing she could turn back the clock, and her life would be on track again. She missed having everything planned, she missed a time when it was all simple and easy. Nothing was simple anymore.

She'd argued with Kate about it. Kate said she was setting a bad example, that she was confusing Ryan, that her parent were scared. She knew that they were, and she hated it. She needed to find out who she was, who Sara Moon was without her dream, without ambition. This was the only way she knew how. She'd tried being perfect, and caring and it hadn't worked. This was the other end of the scale, he'd give it a try, and hopefully she'd find herself somewhere along the way.

 

[Jake Simpson]

Lately Jake's life had been uneventful to say the least; he watched everything pass him by as a blur, not letting the days sink into memory. The Slytherin had no intent to keep any of his days at Hogwarts New Zealand a fond memory, since in the bigger picture none of this would be worth it. The education wouldn't matter; neither would the friends he made, if they were truly friends at all. They were usually stuck in their own little world anyway, completely forgetting he existed if he wasn't right in front of them. Jake knew now friendships like those where definitely not worth the time. He was glad to be graduating at the end of this year, especially without any idea of what the future had in store for him, and he liked not knowing, he liked the danger uncertainty held. But what he enjoyed most of all was leaving this place for good. With his hands buried in his pockets in an allotted attempt to keep warm, Jake strolled out to the great lawn after dinner. He didn't want to go back to the Slytherin common room until he had been outside at least once today, and it was at the great lawn where he asked Sara to be his girlfriend, a memory better left buried for lack of a better word. He didn't hate Sara, he could never hate her. They had just grown apart, and what he had overheard about her lately left him uneasy.

By a stroke of luck, as Jake arrived at the great lawn, his eyes fell on Sara's familiar silhouette. What on earth was she doing here? He quickened his pace slightly, and eventually he ended up standing next to her, leaning against the tree. He didn't give her a hug hello or anything of the sort, Jake didn't even acknowledge her existence, though it was obvious he had approached her. The Slytherin merely kicked the snow at his feet while he conjured up what he was going to say to his girlfriend. Could he even still call her that? Hey hadn't spoken in so long he had no idea what they were any more. "Are you okay?" he finally asked, stifling a breath as he lowered himself to sit next to Sara. He didn't want to freeze in the snow but it was too late to do anything about it now, at least he had a warm hoodie on, although it didn't feel so warm thanks to the winter chill. A few more moments of silence passed before the seventh year managed to say anything else. "People are talking about you, you know. It's worrying." He said. Talking to people had never been his strong point, even talking to people he knew. He was more of a listener than anything.

 

[Sara Moon]

Sara began drawing circles in the snow, swirls that interlocked and spiraled, the green of the grass showing beneath the white frosting. It brought a small, sad smile to her face, it was beautiful, and it hurt her to think that soon she'd be gone, gone from the shelter of the worly she knew. The crunch of feet on the snow alerted her to the fact that someone was approaching her. "Jake." she breathed, relief shooting through her body. Jake wouldn't shout, or scare her. He wouldn't get mad the way Kate would, but then again... She couldn't know. They hadn't spoken in too long. She'd missed him, a lot. She knew he was used to her the way she used to be. Looking down at her skirt, she could tell he wouldn't approve. She looked at her feet as he sat beside her. Part of her felt like leaning on his shoulder, and letting herself cry, let herself tell him what had happened. Would he understand? Could he grasp how much she'd needed to do this, because losing her dream had made her loose herself.


She looked up at him, as he questioned her. "No. I got an A in Herbology Jake, I'll never be an auror." she told him, beginning to tear up. She put her head in her hands, not wanting him to see her cry. "I don't know what to do. I spent so much time thinking about Kate, and Ryan and all their problems, and now..." this was the first time she'd been able to say that aloud, to express herself without anger. She looked back up as he said people had been talking about her. "I know. I just...don't care. I've spent so long being the perfect little girl, am I not allowed try something else?" she replied, biting her lip as she anticipated his answer. It had been the perfect little girl that he'd started dating, not the girl she was now.