Closed The Start of Something

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx was nervous. He couldn't remember ever being this nervous for anything. He spent nearly an hour showering, scrubbing himself clean, washing his hair. He spent another hour wrapped in a towel, carefully styling his hair, doing his eyeliner. He added a light coating of a darker eye shadow. The darker color made his eyes pop. He almost put on dark red lipstick, but... something stopped him. He couldn't figure out what, so while he was debating, he went on to get dressed, very carefully slipping into slim jeans and cute boots. He was tempted to dress up more, but Jamie had said 'smart casual'. Onyx found a short-sleeved white shirt, rolling the sleeves up a little more to make it look better. The suspenders weren't really needed, but he thought it made him look smarter. The jacket he'd picked to go with it looked good, it made the outfit complete, it made him look cute and casual but also a little edgy and stylish. He was sure he looked great.

He draped the jacket on the couch and moved back to the bathroom, still debating the lipstick. Was it too bold? Too dark for him? He sighed, eventually going for a deeper pink, one that would darken the color of his lips in a good way, and one that came with a pleasant cinnamon tint. He hummed happily, feeling better now that he was ready, looking fierce. At least, until he happened to glance at his phone. He was running late, almost fifteen minutes past when he had agreed to meet at Jamie's apartment. His eyes widened and he pocketed his phone quickly, double-checking his reflection before apparating out.

Onyx reappeared on Jamie's front step, practically bouncing on his feet as he knocked on the door. He let out a shaky breath, heart pounding in his chest. He could feel the flush in his cheeks, the slight shaking of his hands. He tried to still that by placing his hands in his jacket pockets, his... jacket... Onyx nearly groaned, swallowing nervously. His whole look was ruined without the jacket! Did he have time to pop out and back in? Before he could even begin to step back, the door had opened. "I didn't forget my jacket!" he squeaked, wide-eyed. He straightened, swallowing nervously. "I mean- I'm late, I'm sorry, I- heh, hello," Onyx blushed, looking down. He was making a fool out of himself already.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie was excited for this, he could barely keep himself from bouncing around the apartment as he got ready, he’d planned this out, trying to make sure he could account for everything, had a plan for everything, no matter what happened, but he knew he was overthinking it. It was just that Jamie wanted this date to go well. He knew they’d been dancing around each other for a while, that Onyx was interested but he wanted them to be an item, not this to and throwing. He wanted to make sure that Onyx was comfortable and happy. He wanted this to go well. He had also hoped to maybe find the time to hide the piano alittle, but he didn’t. And instead he was just looking at it directly as the doorbell went. He walked over and opened it, a little startled by Onyx’s opening line which was then recovered. But, that didn’t matter to Jamie, it was how Onyx was dressed. Of course Jamie had seen him in a number of way but this was the most put together he’d seen him. ”Wow…..,” was all he could say, ”Just...wow.., beautiful,” he said, he stood out the way and invited Onyx quickly into his home. ”You can borrow a jacket of mine if you need, but…..” he liked the outfit without though. ​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx almost winced, not looking at Jamie right away. Was it that bad? He hadn't wanted to mess up so quickly. He glanced up, a little sheepishly, though his eyes widened and a blush colored his cheek when Jamie said 'beautiful'. Onyx hesitated, swallowing nervously. "Beautiful mess, maybe," he joked shyly, taking up Jamie's offer to go inside. "It's okay, thank you though, I'm just- nervous, I haven't been on like a date since I was, um, 14?" he chattered nervously.

At least, until he saw the piano. He stopped, eyes widening. He was silent for several moments, heart pounding furiously and his cheeks hot. That... That was new. "Um... mon chiot?" Onyx turned to look at Jamie, confusion in his eyes. "What- um, when- I mean, um, do... You play?" He asked, uncertain. Jamie had to play, right? There wasn't any other reasonable explanation.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie shook his head, ”baby, you and I have different definitions of mess perhaps. You look beautiful,” Jamie almost felt a little nervous about this now, he was sure he had planned correctly, but perhaps he hadn’t, what if it wasn’t enough to impress him. What if after all of this that Onyx decided he was not interested. He still welcomed him back into his home and gave a little smile, ”I’m nervous too…,” he told him, but the words were lost as Onyx looked towards the piano which Jamie had forgotten to hide. His cheeks flushed dark red. ”No….” he said and then finished the gap between them, taking Onyx’s hands in his, ”Listen baby….your story about the piano and practicing, I dunno, I thought it was a pity you didn’t have anywhere to practice, and I have all this money from quidditch that I barely use….just you know, if ever you want to get away or play without others hearing, you can come here, I can leave and come back when you’re good….” he stopped himself from rambling further or from more expressly saying that the piano Jamie had gotten was entirely for Onyx. ​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx had been unthinkingly staring at the piano. He jumped a little, looking up to Jamie with wide eyes as the man took his hands. His heart fluttered as the quidditch player talked about why he bought the piano. "Jamie," he breathed. The boots he was wearing gave him added height, but he was still a few inches shorter. Onyx stepped forward, burying his face in Jamie's neck and wrapping his arms around him tightly. "I don't- no one has ever- I can't believe you-" he laughed lightly, holding on to the other man. He let out a shaky sigh. "I'm going to ask you to be my boyfriend," he spoke softly, almost shyly. "When I'm not so scared of- of all of this." Onyx hesitated, burrowing a little further into Jamie. "I just- I just need more time. I'm a mess, I know I am, but I am trying, I swear, I," he bit his lip, shifting a little to take one of Jamie's hands in his. He brought their hands up, pressing Jamies hand over his heart. "My heart is yours, Jamie, if you want it, it just- I just- I just need some time,"

He let out a soft sigh, pulling back, though he kept Jamie's hand. "You don't have to go anywhere, how am I supposed to get you to cuddle me after if you aren't here?" he teased softly. He bit his lip, turning to glance at the piano. "I, ah, can I?" he asked softly, walking over. He ran his fingers over the keys, and after a moment, he sat down. He hesitated a moment, before he slowly began to play. He slowly relaxed, getting more confident. After the first song finished, he fell into a new song. He laughed lightly, looking over to Jamie as the final cords of the other song faded.

He hesitated for a moment, before turning back to the piano and starting a new song, singing along softly this time. It was a bit bold of him, he knew it, but hell, Jamie had bought him a piano. Onyx could be a little bit bold. He was flushed crimson, swallowing nervously as the song finished, glancing away, a little afraid to look at Jamie. The last time he'd tried anything even remotely similar, it had not ended well.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie was certainly nervous as he watched Onyx interact with the piano, he had half expected his reaction to be calling Jamie weird and then walking out the door. But he didn’t. He wrapped his arms around him and smiled at him. He gently shook his head and smiled. ”We’re in rush, I’m yours, and I’ll be your boyfriend when you are ready,” he assured him. He didn’t mind how much time Onyx needed as far as Jamie was concerned this was it for the long haul. He intended to keep working at this with Onyx until this really fizzled out but he didn’t think it would, there was just something about Onyx about this, that felt so incredible right to him. He laughed lightly, ”I’ll go wherever you tell me,” before just motioning to the piano, stopping himslelf from just outright saying, well, it’s yours. He conjured a chair to sit down just off to the side, watching the man’s fingers on the keys and then up at his face. As one song morphed into another Jamie gave an encouraging expression, which only grew as Onyx went on to play a third song singing during this one. When the song ended he got up moved over to Jamie, giving a little applause, ”Baby, you are so talented, my apartment has never sounded so good and you sing?!” he told him. He went to sit down next to him and put an arm around him, bringing him in close as one could. ”I’m so in awe of you, that was utterly beautiful,” He couldn’t help but say. It was three songs, but Jamie wasn’t a musician, no one in his family was. He could see why Onyx was so afraid he might lose that talent. ”I could spend all day and all night listen to you play,”​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx glanced up nervously, giggling a little shyly as Jamie applauded him. He relaxed completely, turning into Jamie and cuddling into the man's side. He slid a hand onto Jamie's knee, smiling softly and nestling his nose against Jamie's neck. He hummed lightly in response. He was completely content snuggled against Jamie, and without realizing he'd started, Onyx was purring, loudly. It was several long moments before he brought up the willpower to actually answer. "Well, you could," he smirked impishly, shifting in his seat, pushing up on a knee so he was above Jamie. He took the mans' face in his hands and ran his thumbs lightly over Jamie's cheeks. "But I do believe I traded kisses for a date."

His smirk widened. "Do I need to trade more kisses to get out of the house?" he laughed lightly, leaning down and kissing Jamie, laying his arms over Jamie's shoulders. This kiss felt different than before- not in a bad way, not at all, but Jamie had knocked down every wall Onyx had. Onyx felt very open, and very vulnerable, but also very safe. His kiss was a bit more sure now, a little more confident. He knew he was still going to struggle a lot with this, but in this moment he felt very sure that he had found something that was real and not just in his head.

Onyx giggled, running his fingers through Jamie's hair. "I don't think I've been this excited for something since my uncle took me to the aquarium when I was nine," he mused, pressing another kiss to the tip of Jamie's nose. He shifted, settling in Jamie's lap. "Where are we going, mon chiot?" Onyx asked, smiling warmly at Jamie. Onyx hadn't eaten yet today, too nervous to even think of food. Was it a dinner date? Some sort of activity? He'd only been on one date, and that had been to the candy shop and the three broomsticks, and Onyx had spent four months' worth of allowance on it. He didn't regret it, but it wasn't much as far as dating experience went. Onyx was embarrassed to admit that his experience was much more in the bedroom than out of it.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie accommodate somewhat as Onyx moved in close, he was holding him into him closely. Smiling softly at him, still so impressed with hearing him play and sing. Given that he’d been so weird about it, and nervous about taking it back up Jamie had figured he’d be good. But not...not this enchanting. He turned his head and pressed small kisses in return, letting him be able to just smile into them too. For a first date, first real date Jamie thought it was going rather well. He had had big plans for the day and as Onyx spoke he couldn’t help but laugh. ”Well, it’s funn you should say that, I had two plans for today, lunch on the waterfront, little walk, drinks and then a fancier dinner. But I also had thought we could get some churros and go to the magical aquarium just on the outskirts of town by the massif des calanques,” he thought the latter would be the more fun option of the two, the former the more formal and expected thing but he’d come to expect and want to explore the unexpected with Onyx. ”So, I’m thinking we do the latter and if we have time for dinner we can still make the reservations I made,” he paused, pulling away slightly and looking at Onyx to make that final decision about what he wanted to do. ​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx's eyes widened at the options Jamie gave. He was very tempted to pout, did he really have to choose? He would gladly do both, but something told him that wouldn't actually really work well. He laughed lightly, peppering kisses over Jamie's face. "I've gotta admit the aquarium does sound nice," he mused. "Though I suppose that means I have to move out of your lap," he did pout a bit, cuddling closer. He was a little worried once he got up again his head would straighten out and he'd lose the bit of confidence he had at the moment, and he was enjoying it. He picked up Jamie's hand, playing idly with the mans fingers. He let out a soft sigh, burying his face in Jamie's neck for a few more moments before pulling himself together and standing up again. He smiled, a little shyly, and offered out his hand for Jamie.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie nodded as Onyx seemed to pick one of the options he had offered him. ”It will unfortunately, but I hear the aquarium is very very good,” he told him, though he could admit he’d rather stay with him at the piano and allow himself to have kisses peppered on him, but he wanted to take Onyx out properly, he couldn’t do that if he was stuck getting and giving little kisses. He wanted to treat onyx right for him to feel treasured and loved. He got up took Onyx’s hand without hesitation, smiling, ”Do you still want a jacket or do you think you’d be okay without,” He asked, he needed to know now so they wouldn’t get too much into it and ending up making a detour back to get one. He thought that if they did, it might take a while before they manage to get back out. ​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx pouted a little at having been evicted from Jamie's lap, even though he'd done it himself. But having Jamie's hand in his was nice too, and Onyx was quick to lace his fingers through Jamie's. Onyx thought about Jamie's question a moment before smiling impishly and lifting up the Frenchman's arm and sliding under it. He cuddled into Jamie's side a moment, acting like he was considering it. "Hmmm, this is warm, I think this would do alright," He teased, looking up to Jamie with sparkling sapphire eyes.

It wasn't long before they'd made it out of the house, and Onyx let Jamie lead him, sticking close to his date. Onyx couldn't stop smiling, and held Jamie's hand as much as the other man would let him. This was... this was really nice, already, and Onyx was suddenly very glad he'd gotten drunk all that time ago on his first trip to Marsielle.

He was a little hesitant to try the churros, honestly, but after a careful bite of Jamie's he decided they were indeed very good and ate his happily, offering a bite to Jamie to make up for the one Onyx had stolen. When they made it to the Aquarium, Onyx lit up like a child on Christmas. He pulled Jamie along, leaning in and watching the fish in awe. He laughed a lot, pointing out every little thing to Jamie and giggling. They'd been there for a while and Onyx was enjoying himself. He smiled, watching one of the exhibits and unthinkingly leaning into Jamie.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie was pleased when Onyx went under his arm and gladly held Onyx a little closer in. Jamie made sure that he was the one who apparated so Onyx wouldn’t have to think about it. Thankfully it was still warm in Marseille, the usual warm air lingered as he got them some churros, finding it funny that Onyx tested them by taking a bite of his one. But definitely took a bite of Onyx’s when offered, he had to take back what was owed after all. Being on this date in this aquarium with Onyx was something else. It had been a while since he’d been somewhere like this. And he was happy to be dragged in each direction, giving bits of information about the different creatures when he knew something. He had a fond smile and whenever Onyx was close moved his arm around him to bring him in closer. They had stopped, probably briefly as Onyx looked at one of the exhibits, admittedly Jamie was looking more at him and his fun that at the fish, but as he leaned in Jamie moved his head a little and kissed the top of Onyx’s head lightly. ”I’m definitely going to need to take you to more aquariums,” he was thinking about a muggle restaurant where the whole thing was underwater, Onyx would surely enjoy that sort of thing too. ”So, why do you like aquariums so much? If the piano thing doesn’t work out, will you become a marine biologist?”​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx smiled, shutting his eyes and relaxing against Jamie. "Aquariums are nice," he agreed easily, and hesitated a moment. "Really, though, I... I'm happy as long as I'm with you, we, ah, we can be anywhere really, just... Just together is enough," he admitted softly, feeling a little shy. Onyx knew he liked Jamie too much, he couldn't help himself.

He smiled a little at Jamie's question and shook his head. "No, music is my life. I'll figure out something with it. " Onyx hesitated a moment. "I don't really have to worry about money. I come from a wealthy family, grandmother owns a very successful business. I... Have a rather comfortable trust fund from her. And an inheritance set aside from my parents. Grandmother is strict, but shes a good woman. Im sure she'd cut us off if we did something terrible enough like my aunt-" Onyx stopped himself, biting his lip, unthinkingly reaching up to trace his fingers over the scar on his head.

He burrowed a little more into Jamie, ignoring the twisting of his gut and looking back at the fish. "I told you, I think, that everyone calls me a kitten. The purring adds to it, yeah, I just... I dunno, the water, the fish, its just... Very relaxing. And beautiful. I dunno, it... It centers me a bit, I guess," he spoke softly, wrapping his arms around his chest.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie looked around him in the aquarium and hmmed in agreement. He could agree too that anywhere they could go so long as they were together would definitely make him happy. He smiled a little, ”Well that’s good because your music is magical,” he said softly before just listened to Onyx and his family. He wasn’t too surprised that there was money in the family, but he could appreciate that it hadn’t much affected Onyx as Jamie had known money like that could affect people. He nodded, ”That’s good, that you’ll be able to pursue your dream without worrying about money too much. It would be a great shame is the world didn’t hear your music,” the man told him. He laughed a little at what he said, and tightened his grip on Onyx a little as he wrapped his arms around him. ”That’s funny, my parents always say and my ex always used to say I was like a dog, like a labrador, cheerful, energetic, loving, a little dumb but well meaning,” ​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx blushed, looking away and smiling shyly. "Thanks," He bit his lip. His face fell a little when Jamie mentioned his ex, and Onyx burrowed a little more into the quidditch player. "Can... I ask about your ex?" He inquired softly, already worrying that Jamie's ex had been better, more worth Jamie's time than he was. It oddly reminded him of Chrys, of how he'd felt after the relationship had ended, but he knew it was just old hurts popping up and wasn't actually Jamies fault. The thought of Chrys dampened his mood a little, and he smiled sadly. "Chrys used to call me his kitty. I made a joke out of it at first, called him Boo," he shook his head. "That whole relationship was a disaster," he mumbled, half to himself, hiding a bit against Jamie.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie smiled and nodded, ”Yeah, you can, but there isn’t much to tell. I was interested in her but she wasn’t as interested in me, so the relationship just didn’t work out. I was sad at the time but it’s been a good number of years so I’m over it, but I’ve also gone ahead recent and met this great guy who plays piano more beautifully than I’ve ever heard it be played,” the man said with a little smile. He nodded as Onyx mentioned his ex and he got the impression from how he said it and the few words he’d picked to describe it that a disaster was perhaps putting it mildly. But he didn’t want to press it, ”I like the pet name you’ve given me, and I won’t call you kitty, I think baby suits you too,” he didn’t want to call Onyx something that could have those negative connotations and it would be easy enough to come up with a new one if he wanted one. Afterall a nickname was just a nickname. ​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx listened to Jamie, pouting a little at the man's words. "Well she's stupid," he grumbled, though he could hardly complain; if Jamie's ex had really had any sense to keep the Frenchman then Onyx wouldn't be the one in his arms right now. He blushed as Jamie continued, smiling and hiding his face in the man's neck. "Now I know you're just trying to get laid," he teased gently. He smiled, shutting his eyes and resting against the other man.

Onyx reached up, covering Jamie's hand with his own and running his thumb lightly over the skin. Feeling a little sappy, he pressed a soft kiss to Jamie's neck. "You can call me a fool; just keep calling me," he murmured with a shy smile. "You don't have to call me kitty if you don't want to," he added softly. "I just..." Onyx sighed, burrowing a little further into Jamie. "I just wanna be yours," he admitted quietly.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie shrugged a little, he didn’t think his ex was stupid, she was just a person whose feelings hadn’t aligned with his. That was fine. He was over it, over her, and well, he had something endlessly better now. He laughed lightly at the teasing but gently shook his head. ”I’d be happy with just kisses,” and really though he did want to eventually sleep with Onyx, he didn’t want to rush it and he would wait until they were both good and ready. He shook his head a little, ”I’d be a fool to call you a fool. You are mine, and I'm yours” he didn’t think it was kind to refer to someone you loved as a fool, even affectionately in his mind. He could maybe call him kitty but baby rolled off the tongue a little better. ”Shall we keep moving, there are plenty more fish to see?”​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

-godmod approved-

Onyx blushed deeply. He snuggled in closer to Jamie, reaching up and tracing his fingers lightly up the mans jawline. If he was being honest, he was usually much farther than kisses by this point. He was just... usually, just very keen for the affirmation that he was wanted, that he mattered. But then, he was also usually alone again by this point, too. Wanting was hardly the issue, really, he just... was a little worried that if they took that step then he would lose Jamie the same way he'd lost everyone else. And that would just be upsetting.

He pushed the thought away, focusing instead on having Jamie with him. He smiled a little, shaking his head some. "Actually, mon chiot, I was thinking I'm getting hungry. Maybe the gift shop, then dinner?" He asked, but hesitated. "Oh, first though," he turned them a bit so that the aquarium was behind them. He pulled out a camera, smiling shyly. "If there's one thing I remember, it's how to stash a camera until its useful, and with a family that has two professional photographers, I would be very much in trouble if we didn't get a photo of our first date," He gave Jamie his biggest blue eyes, not mentioning the probably obvious part that of how he wanted it, too. "I promise I'll get you a copy," he laughed lightly, relaxing against Jamie again and lifting up the camera.

At the last second, Onyx decided to try something cute and turned his head, meaning to kiss Jamie on the cheek. Apparently, Jamie thought the same, and the kiss was absolutely unexpected. Onyx giggled, hiding his face in Jamies neck and slipping the camera away again.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie smiled at Onyx and nodded as he said he was getting hungry. ”Sure baby,” he agreed, while he was enjoying looking at the fish, and watching Onyx look at the fish, he was happy to go, spend the time outside and in the warmth of the day, getting dinner together. Jamie was a little curious as to what he wanted to do, but a picture. He was happy to take a picture with him, and of course he would want a copy, ”It would be rude of you to not get me a copy of our first picture,” he said, he would be sure to set it somewhere good in the apartment, make sure everyone saw it. So with that in mind as Onyx got ready to take the picture Jamie had moved to kiss his cheek when he was supposed to. But at the last second as Jamie leaned in, he wasn’t met with a cheek but just Onyx’s lips. Jamie laughed lightly and gave him a little smile. ”Wow, we are one in the same, if that’s a magical camera it’ll have caught that moment in full for forever and I would absolutely drag it out to show everyone, and well, I guess I’d do the same if it wasn’t,” Jamie laughed lightly, ”COme on let’s go eat,”​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

-approved-

Onyx giggled, shaking his head and spending a little longer than he needed to snuggled into Jamie's neck. He raised a brow when Jamie said they could go for dinner, laughing and taking a step away. "Oh no you don't, I said gift shop first, come on," He grabbed Jamie's hand, lacing their fingers and pulling the Frenchman with him on a quick search for what he wanted. Onyx's eyes lit up again when he spotted the shop and he hurried inside, eager to look around at everything.

He browsed through the various trinkets, humming softly and looking over everything. He hesitated when he spotted a spinning rack of sea creature plushies. He smiled widely and wondered over, unthinkingly pulling his hand free as he looked through them. It had only been a few moments before he saw something, and his entire face lit up again. "Awww, Jamie, look at this one, it's so cute!" Onyx cooed, picking up a smaller toy. It was a little dark blue octopus with big, sparkly blue eyes and short tentacles. Onyx laughed, hugging it a moment. "It's so sooooft," He checked the price before he set it down, grinning and reaching for his wallet.

Onyx's smile quickly faded as he patted himself down. He cursed lightly, scolding himself. He'd left his wallet in his jacket. He did find a little bit of money in his pants, but it wasn't quite enough for the stuffed toy. He blew his hair out of his eyes, pouting a moment, but the movement brought something else to his attention. There, by the register on the opposite wall, was a small tray of charms. His eyes lit up again, and completely distracted, Onyx hurried over.

After several minutes of selecting the perfect one and paying for it Onyx rushed back to Jamie, practically bouncing with excitement. He grabbed Jamie's wrist, lifting it to show the charm bracelet Onyx had gotten ages ago, and he quickly added the new dolphin charm. "I know this adds to the number on the bracelet, but this won't affect the luck because this isn't actually a charm, it's a memory, so it doesn't count, right?" He chattered happily, holding Jamie's hand with both of his and looking up when he was done, blowing his hair out of his eyes again and smiling happily.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie let himself be dragged to the gift shop and mostly followed in behind ONyx as he looked at things. There wasn’t anything he needed from such a place, no upcoming birthdays or anything like that. He looked at the plush toy that Onyx had picked out and laughed lightly, it was a little cute. He wondered what it would be like if he cast a little animation on it. But of course not now. He noticed that Onyx had apparently forgotten his wallet. But it seemed he was distracted from it and headed off somewhere else. Jamie grabbed one of the plush toys and made quick work of paying for it. He put the toy into his pocket, he’d give it to Onyx a little later and just headed outside the store, just waiting for Onyx to finish up. He held up his arm to let Onyx place the new charm on to it. ”Course,” he told him. ”It’s beautiful,” Jamie inspected it closer and just leaned in and pressed a kiss to Onyx’s check. ”Are you ready to go to dinner now then?”​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx giggled softly as Jamie kissed his cheek, reaching for Jamie's hand and stepping closer. He smiled shyly up at Jamie. "Yeah, yeah, dinner sounds good." He agreed, pleased he'd gotten a new charm and a picture for the day. He let Jamie lead them out and to dinner, greatly enjoying the rest of the evening. Dinner was delicious, and Onyx found himself relaxing more and more around Jamie, chattering on idly about things he remembered and asking Jamie a million questions of his own.

By the time Jamie was walking him home, Onyx wasn't ready for the date to be over. He wanted to just follow Jamie home and stay with him forever, but Onyx knew it was too soon for that sort of thing. He wanted to do this right, he wanted this to last. He held onto Jamie's arm, sighing as they walked towards his house. It was a little cheesy, sure, asking Jamie to walk him home, but Onyx didn't want to let go yet. He laid his head on Jamie's shoulder a bit as they walked, sighing softly. "I've had a really good time, mon chiot," he rubbed his thumb lightly on Jamie's arm.

Onyx tried to piece his thoughts together as they walked. He knew what he was thinking, but he wasn't sure he was allowed to say any of it. I love you, I want you, stay with me, don't go. It was just who he was, he knew that, he cared too much too soon. He had to slow himself down, pace himself, or he was going to have his heart broken again. They had had a good night, sure, and Jamie seemed at least somewhat interested, but that didn't mean Jamie would just drop down on one knee and keep Onyx forever.

Onyx sighed again, his mind a whirlwind. "I..." he struggled to find the words. Deciding to try a bit of honesty, Onyx slowed. "Jamie, I really, really like you, a lot more than I should," he told the Frenchman, watching his feet. "I'm scared. I... don't want to admit just how strong my feelings for you are, and a part of me just wants to pull away and break this off, run away and protect myself from being hurt again. But it- you- I," Onyx sighed, stopping and pressing his face more against Jamie's shoulder. "I'm worried. Im worried Im going to wake up and this is just a dream, I'm worried you're going to move on without me, I... I'm worried you aren't going to like me the way I like you," he admitted softly, feeling the tears welling up in his eyes as his insides churned and twisted.

 

[Jamie Derouin]

Jamie smiled as they headed to dinner and eventually Jamie was walking him home. He smiled easily at him and nodded lightly. ”This was amazing,” he agreed. He wasn’t sure what to say, he half wanted this night to continue but he didn’t want to rush things or make Onyx feel rushed. He wanted to woo and treat Onyx how he was supposed to be treated. He kind of wanted to kiss him but it seemed that Onyx had something to say. He could understand given what he knew of Onyx’s history of his dating history, of his past why he might be nervous about this, worried that it wasn’t as real, but Jamie knew it was. He could see the tears welling in the other man’s eyes and Jamie from his pocket pulled out the little plush toy he’d bought in the gift shop and brought it up to Onyx. ”So, I was telling this little plush toy that’s going to have a new home with the man I really like, more so than I’ve ever like anyone. I was telling him about how easy I find being around him, and how wonderful he is. That if he has strong feelings for me, how much easier it is to admit even in the earliness of this relationship, how strong my feelings are for him also,” he wanted to say it and hopefully help Onyx believe it with the gift he’d bought him. He knew saying it would work, but the gift would be an easier way of expressing it and hopefully helping put Onyx at some ease with it. Things moved fast with them, and Jamie knew he was falling for him deeply, he just had to say it. ​

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx hardly noticed they had reached the door of his house, he was too focused on this conversation. His eyes widened when Jamie pulled out the little plush toy, and he couldn't help but let out a small laugh. He took it gently, a tear slipping down his cheek. He let his hair fall forward a little as he ducked his head, running his fingers over the soft fabric. He bit his lip, heart fluttering in his chest. He slipped the plushie into his pocket knowing already that he would keep it on his pillows.

Right now, though, he had something else to do. He wasn't sure how to respond to Jamie really, not with words at least. Onyx stepped closer and slid his hands up Jamie's shoulders. Words might be failing him but he had a better idea anyway, pushing on his toes just a little to press his lips to Jamie's.