Closed Stars Over Lake Vänern

[Arvel Ayers]

When Arvel had written inviting Jacob on a trip to Sweden, he'd braced himself for a hard 'no'. Wild camping wasn't everyone's idea of fun; and even if it had been, a great many people would have preferred to go alone than with Social Klutz, Creator-of-Uncomfortable-Silences, Bore-of-the-Century Arvel Ayers. He'd half expected Jacob to ignore his letter altogether, although when his owl returned promptly with a reply in its beak, he felt a pang of guilt for harbouring such low expectations. Jacob would never be so rude. He might have been out of his mind, however, because despite understanding he would have to spend two full days in Arvel's company, he'd said yes.

And this was how they had come to be hiking through the Swedish forest in the middle of May. They followed a trail through the tall, whispering pines, afternoon sunlight filtering through the canopy. The small, light-weight packs on their backs held a deceptively large amount of equipment: tents, sleeping bags, flasks, fold-up chairs, and a huge telescope, complete with tripod. Their dogs trotted ahead, pausing occasionally to sniff the bracken or watch squirrels scurry up trees. Arvel didn't say much. There was plenty he wanted to talk about, but none of it could get past his filter, which was working overtime to make sure he didn't embarrass himself. This was all well and good, except for the fact that silence also embarrassed him. He really couldn't win.

They reached Lake Vänern on the fringe of dusk. Although lake didn't do it justice. It might as well have been the ocean; you couldn't see the other side of it. Arvel had come here twice before, but the sight of the water still took his breath away.

He shrugged off his backpack and stood it up against a tree. "I'll do the tents," he said, suspecting Jacob would prefer to assemble his telescope. But he soon discovered it wasn't going to be so easy. These weren't the tiny pop-up tents he was used to. They had poles, and pegs, and eight-page instruction books. He'd bought them on a whim the day before the trip, worried Jacob wouldn't be comfortable in his old one, and he hadn't had time to practice putting them up. Oh, well - how hard could it be? He was a wizard, after all. They had a spell for this.

Yes - they had a spell for this. A spell that Arvel had never managed to master. Jacob could probably do it wandlessly, or something, but Arvel? He stood before the pile of polyester and canvas, summoning up the courage to point his wand at it. "Erecto," he said. The ground sheet tremored promisingly, but it was only the wind. "Erecto." More quietly this time, in case Jacob was listening. Still nothing. Arvel felt his face begin to burn. He was only going to humiliate himself the longer he tried. But what was he supposed to do? He couldn't very well start putting the tents up by hand; that was the same thing as admitting he was a useless wizard, just without using words. And so he simply stood there, staring at the pegs, unable to do one thing or another, and almost wishing Jacob had told him 'no' after all.

Godmods approved

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

Was Jacob surprised when an owl from Arvel appeared at his window one day? Yes. And was he surprised that they were following through on the plans they'd both agreed to? Also yes. The hike was long but the peacefulness of the forest and the company was enough to help the Aurors nervous system begin to relax and accept that it was on vacation mode. The Auror couldn't let go of all his nerves though and his pocketed hand was on his wand as they made their way through the forest following a well beaten path that it was obvious a myriad of hikers just like them had followed.

Arvel hadn't been lying when he'd spoken of the space. The lake was massive, and Jacob had just stared in awe at it for a few moments. The trip was already worth it for that and the company, but there was still star-gazing and other activities to take place. Jacob let out a sigh of content as Arvel volunteered to begin setting up the tents, leaving Jacob to far more enjoyable activities. He shrugged the backpack he was carrying off his shoulders and opened it, digging around for a moment before fishing out his telescope and beginning to set it up.

He was lost in his own world for a few moments, part of him wondering if he should have spoken more, if Arvel had expected him to, part of him praising himself for having the restraint to stay mostly silent during their hike in, and the final part wondering if Arvel had enjoyed the silence as much as he had. It hadn't been uncomfortable in the moment even if now he was having his doubts. Jacob glanced over his shoulder just to see Arvel's progress and found himself taking in the scene. Arvel was just...standing there but their tents were still just piles of cloth and sticks. His brows furrowed before he straightened. The telescope was up; they'd have to make adjustments as they watched the stars later but he'd done all he could for now. "Need any help, Arvel?" Jacob asked quietly.

 

[Arvel Ayers]

Arvel didn't realise he'd zoned out until Jacob spoke, bringing him gently back to his senses. There had been a time, many years ago, when he would have accused the Gryffindor of taunting him; and now that he realised there was nothing in Jacob's voice except kindness, he wondered whether his ears had been mistaken from the start. "Yes," he said. Then he remembered that yes wasn't an adequate answer to that sort of question (although he still didn't see why not), and added, "Yes please. Thank you."

As he turned to set up the fire (at least he could manage that), he was overcome by a strange urge to start talking. It didn't happen often, and it usually backfired, but having his back to Jacob gave him confidence. He knelt down to arrange the firewood as he spoke. "Sorry. For being quiet, sometimes. It's not - that I don't have anything to say. I do. It's just, I never really know how to put it into words. And if I do, people get upset. It's like I annoy everyone without even trying." He'd gotten better at predicting how people might respond, but he hadn't gotten any better at talking. His hand paused on a branch. It was a beautiful reddish-brown colour. In a parallel universe, it would have made a lovely wand. "Why did you talk to me? At school. I've always wondered. You could have been friends with anyone - why me?"

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

Jacob had learned that hanging out with Arvel meant a fair amount of quiet time. It was both a test in his own discipline and having to accept the quiet periods without filling it with the ramblings he usually offered when met with silence and a comfort especially on the occasions where they'd spent time together after a particularly difficult week at work. Jacob nodded his head and then got to work on the tents, the spells coming easily to him.

When Arvel broke the silence a few moments later, Jacob glanced up quickly though he just as quickly returned to his work and just listened. He shook his head at Arvel's suggestion that he was someone who annoyed people and then remembered that Arvel wasn't facing him. "Nah, you're never annoying Arvel" he offered reassurance. The next question caught Jacob off guard and he was glad that Arvel wasn't facing him. The man had a mix of emotions cross his face, a touch of shame, some sheepishness mixed in with other more raw emotions. Jacob cleared his throat and then cleared it again. "I don't know" he shrugged, trying to figure out a way around the question. "You didn't just write me off like a lot of people did. Everyone thought they knew me because my dad was the Minister of Magic, my mom was Head of Gryffindor House. The tents are done" he interrupted himself, putting his wand away as he stepped closer to the fire. "You actually gave me the benefit of the doubt, and that made me respect you more, I guess. You had a mind of your own and didn't let other people tell you what to think" he shrugged again. After a moment, a devious smirk crossed his face. "And it didn't hurt that being friends with you was something that bothered Analei." Even now, the two were still rivals. He could tolerate her more now, mostly because he needed to though he would always consider her a thorn in his side, a know-it-all.

"And now our dogs are best friends so you're stuck with me. Sorry" he stated in a tone that was not at all apologetic.

 

[Arvel Ayers]

Arvel re-arranged branches unnecessarily, straining to listen over the rustle of the trees. He knew he'd asked an odd question, but candidness was one of the things he'd always appreciated about Jacob's friendship. His mental filter still ran overtime whenever they were together, but that wasn't for Jacob would misunderstand him. It was for fear that he would understand - that he'd notice Arvel stammered more around him than anybody else, or held his gaze a moment longer than unusual, or fidgeted when he thought Jacob was looking at him. Arvel couldn't afford to have his heart broken twice. He just couldn't.

Friendship, though - he could manage that. It had never occurred to him that anyone would make prejudgements based on Jacob's family, and he realised then, somehow for the first time, that Jacob appreciated his friendship too. The gains were reciprocal. Arvel had brought something good to his life, albeit unintentionally, albeit with selfish motives at first, but it was still good. Maybe he was trying too hard. Maybe, like him, all Jacob wanted was to belong, and all this anxiety, all this overthinking was holding Arvel back from saying the very things his friend needed to hear.

A smile tugged at one corner of his mouth. He stood up and turned. "Do you think Analei's dog would be jealous of our dogs?" he asked. Analei didn't have a dog, but that was besides the point. "Maybe we shouldn't let them see each other so much." Adore her though he did, Arvel knew Analei could be a bit polarising. In another parallel universe, he was sure the three of them could have been best friends, but he was content to love them both independently. He glanced at the tents, his smile growing. "That one's inside-out, by the way."