Closed Quiet Days

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas lay in bed, humming quietly as he tried painting a new landscape of a rainy lake. He liked the water. Einar lay next to him, and Lucas had offered him his ratty old teddy bear. It was missing an arm, an ear, and an eye after a thrashing the poor bear had received from Lucas's brothers, but with as often as they trashed his stuff Lucas didnt want to buy something they would just destroy.

Besides, Lucas felt he was already branching out enough for the day. He didnt usually try to use paints, his brothers thought it was too girly and tended to rip up any of his work before. But with Einar in his life, Lucas had become more bold while at school. He glanced over as Einer shifted, setting down his paint brush to pull the blanket back up to cover his friend.

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar had had a rough night, the aftermath of the holiday and of the fight with Lucas’ brother, the emotional vulnerability that had followed had made things a little hard. His nightmares had been coming back and he knew his frustration was building. But, that night had been the worst for a long time, every time he’d tried to go to sleep it would be mere minutes before the nightmares would come back. He’d forced himself out of bed and to breakfast, his frustration mounting, his tiredness only aiding it. He was itching for a fight, or for something to do. It was then that his shadow had seemingly picked up on how he was feeling and with a few words had brought him back to the dorm. The other boy wanted to paint and Einar thought that would be an easy thing to do. ​

​

He'd got some work done too. However what had happened was he’d just sat on the bed next to Lucas just watching him, then he’d laid down claiming it was more comfortable and then he’d fallen asleep. He had never been particularly good since coming to school with sleeping in front of others, but he felt safe around Lucas, so he had managed it. Every so often, he’d stir slightly, watch Lucas for a few moments and fall back asleep. Einar’s sleep wasn’t deep but it was helping. He stirred a little as he felt the blanket on him shift but rather than going back to sleep he let himself open his eyes. He noted Lucas, and noted that in his arms was the ratty teddy bear he didn’t remember taking. ”Hey,” he said quietly. ”Sorry I’m not being much fun,” his voice was soft but ladened heavily with sleep. ​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas smiled gently as Einar opened his eyes, pulling his hands back and ignoring the urge to brush Einars hair out of his eyes. "Its alright, you needed the sleep." He moved back to his painting. "Besides, I... like the calm. It's never this quiet at home..." he hesitated, before focusing a little more on his painting. "I've never actually been able to paint like this before. My brothers are always flushing my paints or shredding my papers."

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar gave a little smile and a little shrug at the statement, he would argue that he had always managed before without the extra sleep that he was now getting, but he could admit this was nicer, he felt a lot less angry and even relaxed. He didn’t want to acknowledge that his therapist had been telling him to do something like this when it happened, to give himself time and while getting out there was important, when he forced himself it did more harm. He listened as Lucas assured him he didn’t mind, that it gave him a little space to just paint, without things being destroyed. ”Your brothers are d1cks,” Einar said as he yawned lightly, ”You’d probably really like Fairbanks and Utqiaġvi,” he thought about those places, how quiet and calm it could get. ”It can get really quiet and still there,” he told him.​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas shrugged. "They are," he agreed softly. He considered Einars next words. "Only if you're there, too," he decided quietly. He moved his brush from his painting, running it lightly over Einars hand. "Look, you're blue," he grinned slightly, hoping Einar would appreciate his attempt at a joke.

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar’s smile faltered lightly, but he tried his best to just mask it into a yawn, he was there in Fairbanks, he was on his own. It was always too quiet there, he found it so difficult at times to deal with. The latter was different, he hadn’t been back since they’d moved to Anchorage. But, his mind was broken out of his thoughts quickly as Lucas ran his paint brush over his hand leaving a streak of blue paint upon it. He laughed lightly and lazily reached out with his hand and ran the paint affected area over Lucas’ nose before retreating lightly, he didn’t move very far, still perfect content lying lazily on the bed with the blanket on top. ​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas laughed- actually laughed, softly, as Einar brushed the paint back on Lucas's nose. He dipped his paint brush in the blue paint again before scooting closer and taking Einars arm. He started outlining clouds on Einars arm, humming softly.

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar laughed lightly in response, but gave his arm willing to get painted on. He watched it for a moment, but he could feel himself dozing off a little. He focused his mind, unwilling to actually go to sleep and tried to focus. It was difficult, he was comfortable and at ease, Lucas was humming lightly and it was just nice. But he didn’t want to fall asleep more, so instead he looked towards the very destroyed stuff toy in his other arm and smiled, ”What’s this things name?” he asked. He had to imagine it was some hand-me down that Lucas had ended up with, or something he’d found rather than been given. Einar hadn’t brought any of those old stuffed toys with him to school, but it wasn’t so muhc because he didn’t want to or that he thought they were childish, just that he couldn’t bring himself to with the memories they held and now so many of them were gone entirely. ​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas shrugged at Einars question, moving to clean his paintbrush to switch colors and fill in the clouds with white paint instead. "There isn't one," he murmured. "My aunt travels the world and we rarely see her, but she sends me things sometimes. She sent me that last month since she wouldnt be able to for my birthday." He focused more on Einars arm. "My brothers played with it that night while I was at the store." He shrugged, like it wasnt a big deal, moving to clean his brush and dipping it in yellow now instead, moving back to start outlining a sun on Einars arm.

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar looked at the little thing in his hands and thought it was a damn shame that it didn’t have a name. He didn’t know what it could be called, he knew he wasn’t nearly as creative as Lucas could be at times. He also didn’t want to end up calling it something that he didn’t like. He didn’t want to do that. He noted however that Lucas talked about an aunt, that she might be the one family member of his that wasn’t a complete fool. He smiled a little, ”Maybe we should call it Sun,” he joked, ”Or Patched? Since it’s been all patched up,” he meant the names lightly and just a little fun, ”Where’s your aunt right now?” he asked, ”Do you think she’d send me one? All mine got boxed up after….” einar’s voice faltered and he didn’t finish the sentence, ”Plus it was my birthday recently too,”​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas smiled at Einar's names. "I like Sun," He offered, painting the same sun on both Einar's arm and then the chest of the bear. "We could call him sunny," He offered softly. Lucas shrugged when Einar asked where his aunt was. "I'm not sure. She travels the world a lot, so I really only see her a few times a year." He blinked softly, scooting a little closer to Einar under the pretense of adding more detail to the sun on his arm. "Why don't you keep Sunny for now? I can write my aunt about a new bear." He gave Einar a small smile. "When was your birthday?"

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar smiled a little as Lucas agreed that it could be called Sun or actually Sunny. He gave a little smile and pulled the bear in a little tighter. He listened as Lucas talked about his aunt, enjoying a lot how it sounded, that though she wasn’t around it was someone he could reach out to. The teen was pleased Lucas didn’t bring up or ask much about his mother, he wasn’t sure if he would have managed to talk about her, but Lucas hadn’t asked. He looked down at the bear, and much like the charms that he wore that had been a gift from Lucas before the match against beauxbatons, it wasn’t something he’d ever get rid of. He smiled at the bear sunny and then back up at him. ”Christmas day,” he replied with a little shrug, trying to be dismissive as he said it. As if it didn’t matter, ”Whens yours?”​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas pretended his hand didn't falter when Einar told him his birthday had been Christmas day and tried not to shake the feeling that Einar had spent it alone. "Um... today," He managed softly, "January 21st," He shrugged. "It's why Dawson has been hovering," He managed, "In case Aunt Cassi actually managed to send something. He and Gabriel usually take gifts," He spoke softly like it didn't really matter. "Doesn't... really matter, my parents never really get me anything I would like anyway," He tried to brush it off like it was nothing. He wasn't sure if Einar would have noticed the lack of... well, anything from his family about his birthday. Lucas didn't care, or at least he tried not to, it had always been this way. "You know, um..." He studied the painting on Einar's arm. "Maybe next year you and me can just at school for Christmas break. No one would notice I stayed," He offered quietly.

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar was a little surprised that it was Lucas’ birthday that very day and that his brother had been hovering, suddenly his awful night seemed all the more worth it, if they could just spend his birthday together without the outside world. He didn’t like the fact that Lucas had to worry about his brothers taking what was likely his only gift but it didn’t surprise him. He didn’t like that Lucas had had very little from anyone on this day and hated even more than unlike himself, it was because they didn’t care. Einar’s lonely birthday had been spent with no one and nothing because he had no one left to share it with, even if Lucas then invited him to spend christmas at the school with him. ”What’s that Sunny?” he pretended to speak to the little stuffed toy, ”Oh I guess so, but I’m not very good,” he smirked a little before looking back up at the creature. He took a deep breathe and sang happy birthday to Lucas, it was quiet and off key, laced with Einar’s linger sleepiness. But he was smiling and he hoped it would make Lucas feel better. When he finished he cleared his throat and said, ”I can’t stay, my social worker needs me to stay with my foster family over the breaks,” his voice faltered slightly again as he spoke of them, but he wouldn’t linger on that. ​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas's eyes widened as Einar spoke to the bear, feeling the blush heat his cheeks as Einar started to sing softly. Lucas bit his lip, burying his face in the other boy's shoulder. "Einarrrr," he complained softly, trying to hide his smile.

Though his smile faded when Einar said he couldn't stay, and Lucas hoped his friend didn't notice the way his shoulders slumped a little. "Oh... Okay," he murmured, moving to resume his painting on Einars arm, adding little 'V' birds.

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar had definitely gotten the reaction he’d wanted as he sung happy birthday and let it just sit there without an apology. He knew that what he said after wasn’t what Lucas wanted to hear. He sighed a little and placed a hand on Lucas’ shoulder, ”Hey, if I could I would. Spending the break here with you is better than with some family who forget I’m there,” Einar said to him, trying to reassure him and explain why, ”But, part of the agreement with the social worker for why I can still come here with no questions asked is that I go back to some family at the breaks, it’s not my social workers fault that no one really wants a kid like me,” he had only had the one family so far, but he knew that with his schedule, that they had trouble finding people, and he ended up with those further down the list and he knew from the way his social worker spoke that they weren’t the best people. ​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas glanced up at Einar, listening to his explanation quietly. Was that supposed to make him feel better? Lucas sighed quietly, leaning forward and laying his head on Einars shoulder for a brief second before pulling back again. "Sorry..." He murmured, for more than one reason. He moved to sign his initials on Einars arm before gently placing the skyscaped arm back next to Einar. "All done," he spoke softly, turning back to his actual painting.

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar watched Lucas’ reaction, feeling himself stiffen slightly as the boy lay his head on his shoulder. He knew that Lucas was a very open person when it came to reaching out to someone, but he couldn’t let himself relax with it. It was just something he had found himself struggling to enjoy and he knew Lucas was trying his best to avoid it but mistakes were made. ”it’s okay,” he said, he looked towards his arm and smiled, ”If it wasn’t completely gross I’d never wash this arm again.” he said jokingly, though really he meant it somewhat, that he would keep it if he could. He shifted slightly on the bed and lay his head upon the pillow. He stretched a little, but let himself just stay relaxed, ”What do you want to do for your birthday? Keep it to something we can do in this room,” he joked, but Einar would wake himself up more and drag himself to wherever Lucas wanted to be. ​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas hated how weak he was. He knew Einar didn't like to be touched, he knew that, but merlin, most days all Lucas wanted to do was cuddle close and fall asleep, or hold Einar's hand, or run his hands through Einar's hair or have Einar run his hands through Lucas'. Lucas just craved the physical intimacy so much his heart ached, but he couldn't push. He sat up, signalling Einar to wait a moment before crawling under his bed. There were a few possessions that Lucas had that he had managed to kept hidden from his brothers, rarely to be used, but this seemed like a good time to use it. A few years back, while his brothers weren't home, his aunt had sent him an old, enchanted camera, one of the ones that spit out a picture after you took it. He had never really used it, worried his brothers would see, but this seemed like the perfect opportunity to open it.

He emerged a few moments later with the box, pulling off the dusty lid. There were a few objects inside, mostly just presents from his aunt Cassi. One was the camera, another the first sketchbook he had gotten from her, with an old leatherbound journal look to it, and a half a dozen snapshots of him and his aunt. "Hold still," He told Einar softly, moving the other boys arm and taking a picture of it. There was a small flash, and Einar took the photo as it spat out. He fanned it a little, before offering it to Einar.

Turning his attention back to Einar's last question, Lucas just shrugged as he put the camera back in the box. "It's alright," He reassured his friend. "We don't have to do anything. I never do." He shrugged. "Honestly... this is the first birthday I've enjoyed in years." He shrugged, shutting the box and hiding it under his bed again.

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar watched vaguely as Lucas got up from the bed and went underneath. Einar just lay under the blanket, sunny tight in his grip and waited. It wasn’t like Einar had anywhere to be and this was better than him letting his emotions get too much of a hold of him, or just forcing himself to fight people to release some energy. He held still as Lucas took his arm in a picture, He took the polaroid style magic picture and held it, watching as slowly the image appeared, his new painted arm. He wasn’t too surprised that this was a good birthday for Lucas, and though Einar wasn’t sure how to make it better, he wanted Lucas to have a good birthday, to almost make up for the fact that he hadn’t had a good one himself. He very slowly shifted, stretching out his tired limbs and eventually pushed himself into sitting up. He pulled the blanket off him and got off Lucas’ bed. He went to his own things and rummaged around for a little until he found what he wanted. A little magical radio and an old t-shirt of Einar’s that he never really wore any more. He came back to the bed and sat down on it, placing the t-shirt behind him. He placed the radio down, propped up by sunny and very quietly let the thing play some music, keeping it low and quiet, but enough for them to hear. Then he patted the space in front of him. ”Sit with me,”​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas moved his box back under the bed, keeping it carefully hidden on the off-chance his brother figured out how to break in. He didn't think Dawson was smart enough, but he wasn't going to test it. When he came back up from under his bed, he was a little disappointed to see Einar had moved back to his own bed. Lucas set about cleaning up his paints, looking up when Einar sat back down. He set his paints on the dresser, moving to sit when Einar asked him to, crossing his legs and smiling, holding his hands in his lap. He wasn't sure what Einar was doing, but he wasn't about to argue either.

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar waited until the other boy was sat in front of him. He continued to dance lightly to the music. And he gave a little smile, ”I don’t have much, my family didn’t have much money anyway,” he took the t-shirt he’d grabbed from from his drawers and then held it out to Lucas. ”Happy birthday Lucas,” he held the shirt out to him. ”Don’t try and give it back, I barely wear it,” he knew it wasn’t a real gift, that it was an old shirt of his, and that Lucas deserved better but he would of course give it to him. He just wanted him to have a good birthday and what little he could do would be good, surely. Einar had a little shy expression, hoping that Lucas would enjoy it. Wouldn’t mind that he didn’t have anything else to give him. ​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas's eyes widened when Einar offered him a shirt. "What..." He breathed, looking wide-eyed up to Einar. It was simple, probably overly so, but Lucas didn't care. It was the most thoughtful gift he had received from anyone other than his aunt, and he loved it. He took it, brushing the fabric between his thumbs. He bit his lip, trying not to cry. It was so sweet, thinking Einar would give it to him despite having so little to give. Without a word, he pulled it over his head, slipping his arms in. It was almost comically too big for him, but he loved it anyway. "I'll wear it every night," He promised softly, giving Einar a small smile. He leaned forward for a brief second, very much wanting to hug Einar, but he pulled himself back again. "I love it. Thank you," He told his friend.

 

[Einar Haines]

Einar had been a little nervous about what Lucas’ reaction would be, after all, he knew that giving someone an old and second had shirt wasn’t what most people wanted, it wasn’t something that meant much, and it had just been something that he was willing to part with. He wouldn’t even mind if Lucas had said thanks and then discarded it. He could understand it. But, he was a little surprised when it seemed to mean quite a bit to Lucas. He watched the other boy’s expression as he appeared to be fighting back tears, he seemed to really like and Einar felt almost a little shy about the gift. It wasn’t much and yet he knew that it was the same sort of reaction he’d give if he’d gotten anything for his birthday. He smiled a little shyly as Lucas put it on, and couldn’t help the light laugh as it was far too big for the boy. ”You’ll grow into it,” he said with a little joke, hoping to ease his own embarrassment a little about it. He noted the other boy go in for a hug but then decide against it. ”Ask Lucas, just ask me,” he knew that Lucas was more physically affectionate, and Einar really wasn’t, but if Lucas asked for it, he knew that occasionally he’d be able to tolerate it. ”it’s okay, you deserve a good day,” he told him sincerely.​

 

[Lucas Ames]

Lucas's eyes widened when Einar told him to ask. Automatically he opened his mouth to do so, but instead he just bit his lip and shook his head. "You don't like it. I'm okay," He stated softly, grabbing his pillow and hugging it instead. He watched Einar from over his pillow a moment before speaking again. "I... actually made you something for your birthday... I didn't know when it was but I... remembered what you told me. That it's just you. It's... not much, but... if you want I can get it for you," He offered softly.