Closed Doubts

[Sydney Townsend]

Sydney had been sitting on it for awhile, but she couldn't shake the doubt in her mind after what Minnie had said about Emily being friends with Eric Holland. There were scant few people in this world Sydney actually trusted, and she found it hard to believe someone like Emily would even consider wasting their time with someone like Eric and despite reassuring herself of that fact several times, Sydney couldn't stop thinking about it. Thinking about Emily and Eric holed up together, laughing at her, plotting together. Sometimes if she spent too long thinking about it, she could imagine Samantha was there too, the old hurt she'd only just begun to get over rearing up again fresh and furious.

The only way Sydney was going to get rid of this doubt was by just asking Emily. Flashing her prefect badge at a few disgruntled Ravenclaws, Sydney shouldered her way in to a spot across from Emily at the Ravenclaw table, considering her solemnly for a second before fixing Emily with a serious stare. "I imagine this is foolish to even bother asking, but I was just wondering," Sydney started, "You're not friends with Eric Holland, right? It's a ridiculous thought but I'd just heard..." Sydney trailed off, waiting for Emily to answer.

 

[Eric Holland]

Eric loved many things about dating Minnie, one of them was the excuse it gave him not to sit at the Gryffindor table all the time. While Eric got along a bit better with his classmates lately, he still wasn’t a big fan of the rowdy house table. The Ravenclaw table was still busy, but the students there seemed a lot less inclined to knock things over or throw food items at each other. Eric was heading over to where Minnie sat, when he passed Emily. He nodded at her. “Hey.” He said, before moving on. He only realized after he had passed them that Sydney had been with her. Ugh, he didn’t get why Emily put up with her.

 

[Emily Hastings]

Emily was lost in a book when a familiar voice broke into her awareness. She looked up, almost smiling but pausing at the seriousness on Sydney's face. Emily raised a brow and shut her book. She was about to reply when another voice broke in, and she looked over to him. "Hi, Eric," she greeted easily, before turning back to Sydney. "Well, yes and no. Friends may be a bit strong, we don't spend an extraordinary amount of time together. But we are friendly, yes. I read horror stories to him from time to time, with the pretext of changing his mind on the worth of a good book. I don't really expect to, but it amuses me nonetheless." She replied, folding her hands in front of her and studying Sydney. "Aside from you, Eric, Daintree, and Minnie are perhaps the only people I ever really speak to. Might I inquire as to why you're asking?" She asked.

 

[Sydney Townsend]

Sydney bristled when Eric chose this exact moment to show his face, going so far as to open his mouth to speak to Emily. Sydney felt her own mouth open, ready to shoot back something venomous when Emily spoke first, casually greeting Eric before turning back to face her. Sydney's mouth closed with a click. "Which is it then?" She said tightly, eyes narrowing at Emily's explanation. "Is he 'not really your friend' or is he one of the only people you ever talk to? Who you apparently read books too?" Sydney snapped, feeling something cold and hard hard coalesce in her stomach. So Minnie had been telling the truth. Emily was off spending her time with one of Sydney's biggest enemies and she'd had no idea. What other obvious truths was Emily hiding from her then? Could Sydney even trust her knowing she seemed content to associate with people like that?

 

[Emily Hastings]

Emily's brow furrowed at Sydney's sudden hostility. What? "Sydney, what are you upset about?" Emily asked bluntly. "I've never particularly bothered labeling it, but if I must I suppose Eric and I are friends. I know he has a bit of a reputation for anger management issues but I've personally never seen it. He can be a bit cranky, perhaps, but he's harmless." Emily was starting to feel uneasy, there was something in the way Sydney was looking at her that just... hurt. "You've never asked about my friends before, Sydney. What's going on?"

 

[Sydney Townsend]

Sydney let out a harsh stream of air from her nose, her chest already tightened to a fine point and that was the only point of escape for the breath in her lungs. Emily was playing dumb with her, acting the same way her parents always did, as if Sydney was causing a scene for no reason. It was infuriating. "A reputation," she said incredulously, pausing to inhale sharply, trying to get her thoughts in order over the building rage and betrayal swirling in her stomach. Why did Eric Holland have to ruin everything. "He's a pox on this school, a low life, and apparently only exists to ruin my life. You've been friends with him this whole time? So what? So you guys can just laugh at me?" Sydney couldn't possibly understand why Emily would spend time with Eric. Why anyone would. Unless it was all just some grand scheme against her again. Sydney had gotten used to everyone having it out for her it would only make sense the second she forgot would be when she found out everyone else was off laughing at her about it together. The image of Emily and Eric sitting together, laughing and reading made her stomach clench and Sydney set her teeth on edge, expression cold as she glowered across the table at Emily.

 

[Emily Hastings]

Emily's brow furrowed. "Sydney, what are you talking about?" She asked, hurt a bit by Sydney's assumption. "You know me. I am not laughing at you, not with Eric Holland, not with anyone." Emily pushed her plate aside, crossing her arms on the table in front of her. "Syd, talk to me. In all the time I've known you, you have never mentioned hating Eric Holland. At least, no more than you generally dislike everyone. I've never bothered correcting you, because you're entitled to your own opinions. You are a strong, confident woman, and I have always respected and admired that about you."

Emily's stomach was knotting a bit, anxiety eating away at her. Why was Sydney so upset? "Has Eric done something to hurt you? In all the time I've known him, he's been cranky, but I've never noticed him acting maliciously against anyone. Did he do something while I was away?" She asked, trying to think back. "If he's hurt you, tell me, I'll demand an answer from him later and if his answer isn't satisfactory I'll personally haunt him for the rest of his days for hurting you. What happened?" She asked, worried now that she must have missed something very major for Sydney to be reacting this way. Her mind jumped to a hundred different horrible scenarios, but she waited to hear her girlfriend out before anything else happened.

 

[Sydney Townsend]

Sydney could hear Emily's objections, but she couldn't bring herself to believe anything. She'd spent half the semester ignoring Minnie's comment, sure she'd just been messing with her to get back at her for pointing out how inadequate her own relationship with Eric was, but finding out it was true had cut Sydney down to the quick and the sting made it hard to hear anything.

"Never mentioned it? Are you too busy stuck in your stupid fiction to know anything about me, then? Maybe get your nose out of a damn book for once," She snapped, temper rising as Emily kept making excuses. That's all she ever heard, excuses from everyone why they were picking someone else over her. "Don't try to suck up to me, you've already made it clear where your loyalties lie," she said, jabbing an accusing finger Emily's way as she struggled to her feet. "Don't bother pretending, you can go hang out with Eric all you want without putting up this front," Sydney said with a scoff, pulling her robes free from where they'd tabled with the bench seat in her hurry to stand. "Hopefully in future you know to pick your friends better, I've clearly learnt as much," she said, voice sharp but wavering as she leveled a glare at Emily, feeling on more solid ground now she was standing over her.

 

[Emily Hastings]

Emily's jaw dropped, hurt by the sudden barrage that came out of Sydney's mouth. Emily slammed her book down and stood up, never having been one to have been intimidated. "Are you serious right now?" She snapped, her voice raising, grasping on to her anger in an effort to keep the tears from spilling from her eyes. She was not about to cry in front of Sydney. "You know damn well I don't pretend. I have never pretended with you, and I am sure as hell not about to start now. You're being petty and childish, Sydney. If Eric has actually done something to hurt you, then by all means tell me. I do not accept blind hatred as an acceptable reason to cut him out of my life. You've spent years apparently pretending he doesn't exist,"

Emily snatched up her book, clutching it to her chest. "I will not apologize for spending time with Eric and I damn well won't stop seeing him because it offends you." She stepped back, furious at the entire situation. "When you're ready to talk to me instead of blindly attacking, you know where the hell to find me." Emily turned on her heel, desperate now to get out while her pride was intact.

 

[Sydney Townsend]

"Deadly," Sydney responded to Emily's incredulous statement, planting her hands firmly on the table, eyes cold. There was a ringing in her ears and all Sydney could think about was how she just knew this would happen. It was stupid thinking people wanted to be around her for any reason than to get one over on her. Stupid to think letting herself get close to Emily was a good idea. She scoffed at Emily's excuses, voice choked and bitter in her throat. "Isn't that always the way, people never pick my side in anything, so why would I expect my girlfriend to," she spat, curling her hands into fists on the table and leaning back, standing up straight again. "Well I wouldn't expect you too!" she snapped when Emily refused to back down, crossing her arms over her chest, a barrier between her and Emily. "Like I'd wanna talk to you!" she called to Emily's retreating back, chest aching as Emily stormed from the room. Sydney wished she could leave too, but she didn't want to look like she was running after her. "What are you looking at," she snapped at a nearby Ravenclaw, grabbing her things and stalking over to the Slytherin table. It hurt to swallow, but Sydney was determined to finish her food and leave when she pleased. She wouldn't give Emily the satisfaction.