Closed Awaited And Unaware

[William Kaimarama]

It had taken William a while to adjust to the seasons at Hogwarts, but now that he was used to them, he found he quite liked it. Being further north than his home, it tended to get much warmer than he was used to, much earlier than he was used to, and that meant extra time where he didn't need to lug around half a dozen layers if he wanted to go outside. Though the afternoon was overcast, today was warm enough that he hadn't needed more than a t-shirt and shorts for a walk around the grounds. The forest had been tempting, but after taking some time to check on things in the Wild Patch and prepare some samples for an event he would be running soon, William didn't really want to go too far from the castle. So he had found a spot atop the cliffs and brought a few spare berries from the patch, settling in to watch the lake and enjoy the bird song all around him, the sounds making him ache for the bush back home.

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian had been feeling a bit strange ever since the Halloween feast. He'd been hanging around with William, as they often had, but William had casually said some things to him that now stuck with Abian. Comments about his biceps and how he was hot, and he had said it like it was no big deal. But it was a big deal! That wasn't the sort of things friends just said to each other, was it? Did that mean William liked him? Abian had been thinking about it a lot, not sure what to make of it. Without Amaya to confide in and without being able to talk to William about it for obvious reasons, it just kind of stayed in Abian's head. It was very distracting. So when Abian was hanging out on the great lawn with one of his books, trying his best to study, and spotted William heading to the cliffs, he realized what he had to do. Stuffing his book into his backpack, Abian followed after him, heading up to the cliffs. He stopped when he saw William sitting there, eating berries from the wilderness and looking entirely at ease in nature like some sort of... fairy tale person. Abian cleared his throat. "Oh, uh, hey!" He said, stumbling almost as soon as he drew attention to himself. "You're here too! What a, uh, coincidence. I was just... hoping to study here." He said awkwardly. "And now you're here!"

 

[William Kaimarama]

Abian heard movement nearby long before anyone approached him, well used to keeping his wits about him in nature. He didn't think it was a professor, even less likely some kind of dangerous creature, but he didn't like taking chances. William was just picking up his box of gooseberries when the person came into view, relaxing at once at the sight of his friend. "Hey." William raised a hand, not bothering to even try and help Abian when he stumbled. Abian was an athlete, he could handle himself. He budged up a bit to make room, giving the Hufflepuff a quizzical look as he rambled on. Something was definitely weird, but he had no idea what it was yet. "Cool." William said a little warily, before holding up the box he had been eating from. "Gooseberry?"

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian grinned at William, though the cool reception he got made him wonder again what the boy had been doing at the feast. He did not seem like someone confronted with the guy he liked. Abian was a lot more nervous than he was, which was kind of weird. Abian nodded. "Yeah, cool." He said, sitting next to William with a bright smile. "Thanks." He said, taking a berry from him and popping it into his mouth. Maybe he had to test this. William had said he liked his biceps, so maybe if he showed them off again the boy would show a sign. Abian pretended to wipe sweat off his forehead. "It's kind of hot, right?" He said. Then he rolled up his T-shirt sleeves quickly, baring his arms to his shoulders. He then cast a sideways glance at William, trying to be subtle in gauging his reaction. "That's better."

 

[William Kaimarama]

The weird energy coming off Abian was unmissable, and William didn't really know what to do with it. He didn't seem.... upset, just... weird. It was hard to process, and William was considering just... asking Abian about it, but finding the words was proving easier said than done. He popped another gooseberry in his mouth and looked out over the lake again for a moment, trying to figure out what to do with the stress that had plopped down in the middle of his calm oasis. He looked back over when Abian commented about the temperature, raising an eyebrow. It was warm, sure, but William didn't think hot was the word for it. He frowned when Abian rolled up his sleeves, despite not looking terribly hot at all. "Are you okay, bro?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. It was hard to complain about another glimpse of Abian's guns, but he was too concerned about the way his friend was acting to really enjoy it. "You dizzy from the altitude or something?"

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian looked over at the lake, but looked at William too from the corner of his eye. He didn't seem all that impressed by Abian's arms, which suddenly made him realize he was being a fool. William had just been making fun of him at the feast, that had to be it. Suddenly, Abian felt embarrassed. His cheeks flushed, and he crossed his arms in front of him. "I'm fine." He said, a little more coldly. "Actually. I'm not." He then looked at William with a frown. "Were you just making fun of me at the feast?" He asked, deciding to just ask. "I keep thinking about it and I don't get it. Was it all a joke?"

 

[William Kaimarama]

Whatever was going on with Abian, it quickly became clear to William that he had failed some test in the Hufflepuff's eyes. He frowned slightly, studying Abian's face as he shut the conversation down, then immediately picked it up again. When he continued, though, William couldn't make much more sense of it. "When was I making fun-" William started, quickly cutting himself off as he put the pieces together. "OH! When I was talking about your arms?" He asked, snorting. "Why would I be making fun? You're the hottest guy in our year. Like, objectively." William commented, pausing to eat another berry. "I mean, Vader's alright, but you're on another level."

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian blushed as William put two and two together, nodding as he reminded him of what he had said. But then he only blushed more when William kept on talking, looking at him in surprise. "Dude, what?" He asked him. "No, I mean. I am?" He rubbed his neck awkwardly. "I... uh, Wills. You're like, my friend." He said, stumbling over his words. "That's not the sort of things you say about your friends." He added in a mumble. "I also don't think that's, uh, true. Objectively." He added, though he couldn't help looking a little pleased at the compliment. "But you really think so?" He added, unable to help himself.

 

[William Kaimarama]

William's frown deepened at Abian's reaction, watching the flurry of emotions across his friend's face. A year ago, this would have gutted William to his core, without question. But now standing his ground felt.... natural. "What? Bro, it's not weird to say your friends are hot. Like, I have eyes." He snorted. "And it's definitely true. I mean, we're not exactly a year of perfect tens, but you're definitely topping the ranks. What, you think Caspian's beating you in a beauty pageant?" He chuckled, popping another gooseberry into his mouth. "Ask anyone, you're definitely the hottest seventh year guy." William hesitated, glancing away over the lake for a moment. It would be easy to leave it there, but that just didn't feel right to him anymore. "I mean, I had a thing for you in like... fourth year, fifth year, whatever. But that was forever ago." William had never thought he would be bold enough to admit his crush to Abian, not once the Hufflepuff had started dating Emily, but now... it hardly felt like it even mattered anymore.

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian laughed nervously as William said it wasn't weird, and that he had eyes. He couldn't deny it, he was enjoying the compliments a lot even though he also felt a little strange about it all. He ran a hand through his hair. "Don't be mean." He said quickly. "Caspian is good looking." He nudged William. "It's not a contest, anyay." He said, then scratched his neck again a little awkwardly. "But... thanks." He said, feeling like he was probably red as a tomato now. This only became worse when William dropped another bombshell on him. "Wait, what?!" He asked, turning on him in surprise. "You did? You never said anything!"

 

[William Kaimarama]

William snorted at Abian's comment, rolling his eyes. "Caspian's fine, but you're, like, a model or whatever." He said with a shrug. It was much harder to shrug off Abian's response to his revelation though, and William could feel his cheeks heating up a bit as he met Abian's eyes, painfully familiar nerves creeping in. Had he stuffed this whole thing up? "I mean, I sent you roses and stuff." He said with a shrug. "But you're my mate, it would've been weird. Besides, you're way out of my league. And then you had a girlfriend, so I just... got over it." He shrugged, looking away. "It was ages ago anyway."

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian groaned a little, starting to be embarrassed. "I'm not a model William." He said, though he smiled a little as he said it. He lightly punched William in the shoulder as he admitted to having sent roses. "Not ones you signed!" He said, laughing nervously. "Jeesh, William. I had no idea." He hesitated. "I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings by not noticing." He added sincerely. Then he frowned. "Dude, stop it. You're cute. There's no reason to say you're out of my league." He told him, realizing that William had probably thought this for ages. How horrible. "I was just kind of an idiot." He paused. "Am kind of an idiot." He amended.

 

[William Kaimarama]

As anxious as he had been to say it, finally telling Abian about his long-over crush felt good. William was over his feelings, he was sure of that, but he had still been carrying this secret around for years, a blockade keeping him from being properly honest with his best friend. Now that that was out of the way, it felt like a weight had been lifted. He laughed softly when Abian called himself an idiot, elbowing the Hufflepuff lightly. "I mean, you are a bit of an idiot, but it's not on you, I was too chickensh*t to do anything about it. I knew I didn't really stand a chance, so..." He shrugged, popping another gooseberry in his mouth and holding the box out for Abian again. "But it was forever ago, it's not a big deal."

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian laughed softly as William called him an idiot. He nudged him back. "I don't know." He admitted. "I'm glad our friendship was okay, you're like... one of my best friends." He said with a light shrug. "I don't think I would have wanted to risk that. And I was... kind of hung up on someone." He said quietly. "So I don't know how things would have gone if you had said something." he grabbed a berry and eating it quickly. "I'm just... shocked, I guess." He said with a small shrug. He then glanced at him again. "Do you... like anyone now?" He asked him, trying to sound casual.

 

[William Kaimarama]

William felt a smile flicker onto his face as Abian said they were best friends. He had always been more popular than William, always had more options when it came to friendship, but despite everything, that was true. They had somehow remained best friends, and William was grateful for that. He nodded when Abian went on to talk about being hung up on someone, quietly thinking he could probably guess who. He shrugged when Abian asked if he liked anyone now, glancing out over the lake. "Nah, not really." William said idly, leaning back on his hands. "Just trying to get through school so I can get out of here, at this point. You know. Sooner I can never see half these people again, the better." He hesitated, glancing at Abian. "How about you?" He asked a little hesitantly. "Still... hung up on you know who?"

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian nodded as William said he didn't like anyone right now, and then sighed fondly when he went on his usual spiel about wanting to get away from half of their classmates. "You'll miss them later." He told him with a slight grin. "I know it." Abian then had the question turned on him, and he sighed, looking over at the water. He laughed softly at the way William had worded it. "That makes it sound like I have a crush on Voldemort, ew." He said with a laugh. But the smile faded from his face, and he shrugged. "I don't know... I think it has faded a little, but deep down I think that if I were to see him again it would all come back like BAM." He made a sort of explosion-like gesture with his hands. "We went on a date before he graduated, and it was nice. But I bet he's forgotten all about me. He's out there in the real world, meeting all sorts of people. Maybe even real models and stuff." He smiled sadly. "I'm pretty sure he never saw me the way you did, not really. I was always more of a kid in his eyes I think." He said a little sadly. He highly doubted Jacob had ever noticed his biceps, or anything else like that. "It's an annoyingly persistent crush." He muttered. "I liked him even while dating Emily. Don't tell her that, she doesn't need more reasons to kill me."

 

[William Kaimarama]

William knew he was over Abian, but it still stung a little, to hear how his friend talked about Jacob. Abian could say William wasn't out of his league all he liked, but it was clear he would never feel that way about him. "Oh nah no worries, that chick's crazy." William commented, snorting at the thought of Emily. He had always got a bad vibe from her, and Abian's experience just confirmed it. "That sucks, though. That you haven't been able to like... leave it in the past, y'know." He glanced at Abian's face, then looked back out over the lake. Leaving his feelings for Abian behind had been difficult, but ultimately for the best. "Liking someone who isn't gonna return the feelings sucks."

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian frowned a bit and shook his head at William's words. "No she's not." He muttered, not liking how he spoke about her. But Emily had been a bit much, and he knew she would probably get mad Abian liked someone else while they were dating. Abian looked over at the water as William talked to him, feeling strange about this conversation. Abian had always been hopeful and optimistic, and hearing William's view on things made him question that a bit. "Well, I don't... know if he's never going to." He said, a bit embarrassed at the traces of hope in his voice. Truthfully, whenever he had pictured Jacob after graduation, he'd imagined him doing cool things with cool people. He hadn't ever imagined he might still be out there thinking about Abian, and William's words stung a bit because of that.

 

[William Kaimarama]

William shrugged off Abian's defense of Emily, not bothering to argue. He knew Abian probably felt some sense of duty to her, but everyone knew she had tried to beat up a little kid a couple of years ago, and as far as William was concerned, that put her in the 'crazy' basket. He sighed when Abian refuted his point about Jacob, quietly disappointed all over again. How had he never seen how thoroughly Abian didn't see him? "I mean, I guess so. Not like life ends at graduation." He commented halfheartedly, looking out over the lake. William was... so ready to leave school behind.

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian nodded as William said life didn't end at graduation, clearly deep in thought. He was still a bit scared of what life would look like after graduating, even if he managed to become a healer in training, it would be with people he didn't really know. He realized that holidng onto a crush like the one he had on Jacob was perhaps a bit childish, even if he still wasn't entirely ready to completely let it go. "Maybe I should try." He said with some determination. "To... leave that in the past, I mean." He said with a shrug. "You're right. Just gotta figure out how." He added a little uncertainly.

 

[William Kaimarama]

William had expected this conversation to go down a depressing route, surprised at Abian's about-turn. He glanced at the Hufflepuff for a long moment, then shrugged. "I mean... I basically just avoided you for a year and spent some time alone in the bush, so I dunno if I've got the best advice." He hesitated, glancing at Abian before looking back out over the lake. "You could always try moving on again. Like, sure, Emily didn't help, but he was still at school then. You've got space now to just... I dunno, spread your wings or whatever."

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian nodded as William told him how he had coped. "Sorry." He muttered again, feeling guilty for causing his friend such painw ithout even knowing it. Abian hesitated, rubbing his arm a little when a breeze picked up. But for some reason, he didn't want to put his sleeves back down. "I mean, I didn't just date Emily because of Jacob." He protested. "I actually liked Emily, a lot. And I liked Jacob too. I liked Arvel as well... but that was a bit earlier." He blushed. "Not that I dated him, just kissed him once I guess." He added, not sure why he was telling William all of this. "I can't just decide to like someone on a whim. It happens." He told him. "So I can't just choose to move on." He said with a shrug. "You make it sound so simple."

 

[William Kaimarama]

William shrugged when Abian apologised again, electing not to go into it. He sighed at Abian's comment about choosing to move on, shaking his head. "I don't mean... choose to move on. I just mean, like... I dunno, you're single, you're hot, nobody's stopping you from just... having fun, I guess?" William shrugged, staring across the lake. "I had a thing with this girl who was here on holiday once and it was just, like... hanging out while she was on holiday, summer fling or whatever, we weren't, like.... planning to get married or whatever, but it was.... fun, you know? It was fine. You can just... do that. Be... free, or whatever."

 

[Abian Hunter]

Abian frowned a bit at William's explanation of what he meant. He wasn't sure if he understood entirely, but he guessed he got the gist. "Listen, no matter how much you insist that I'm 'hot'," he said, adding quotation marks with his fingers. "I can't just go kiss some random person. That's weird." He said, scoffing at the idea. "I don't know if I can do that." He said with a shrug as William explained the summer fling thing. "Weren't you sad that you wouldn't see her again?"

 

[William Kaimarama]

William rolled his eyes at Abian's quote marks, starting to get a little frustrated with his friend. There was no way Abian didn't see what he looked like. He shrugged when Abian asked about the fling, shaking his head. "Nah, I mean, we've seen each other since. She was on the Beauxbatons team, she's been here a few times. But like, we were never looking for it to be a relationship. We just... made out for a summer, it wasn't a big deal. She was nice, I did like her, but like, more as a friend I was also kissing, I guess. It doesn't have to be a big deal if you don't let it be. We'd probably still be mates if we ran into each other now."