Closed A New Beginning

Abner buried his face in Eddie's neck. He wasn't sure how much longer it was before he started to settle. Eventually though, he just felt tired. Drained. But... he felt... better. Better than he had in a while. He felt safe, curled up against Eddie. He stirred as Eddie spoke, and couldn't help but chuckle. "You know... she wasn't even mad when I told her what we'd done," He sat up, wiping his arm over his eyes. He smiled warmly, looking to Eddie then. "She actually laughed. Said 'finally'." He quoted, shaking his head.

He shifted then, sitting in Eddie's lap and laying his arms over the mans shoulders. He brought a hand up, brushing Eddie's hair from his eyes. Abner leaned in and kissed the man sweetly for several moments. He pulled back just enough to lean his forehead against Eddie's, tracing his fingers gently along the mans jaw. "I would like that. More than anything." He admitted almost shyly, before kissing Eddie again. Abner sighed, pulling back again to look at Eddie nervously. "Eddie, um... I... I don't... I don't want to be here anymore. In this house. I can't..." Abner shook his head, leaning in again to hide his face in the mans neck.
 
Eddie felt a little better when Abner told him Cara's reaction to the two of them. Perhaps their feelings for each other had always been obvious. After all, there was no doubt in Eddie's mind that he had ever stopped having feelings for Abner, and nothing that Abner could do or say would change that. He simply kept rubbing his back and letting him cry, until Abner began taking control, taking Eddie's face in his hands and pressing their lips together. Eddie didn't dare move away. He stayed still, even felt himself relax a little, until Abner pulled away gently. He had been longing for that kiss for a while, and it felt even better now that it wasn't with a side of guilt. As Abner told him he didn't want to be in the house anymore, Eddie didn't hesitate in offering his own. "You don't need to. You can come live with me. It's a small place, but it will be enough. Just until you feel better, or we figure something else out." Eddie suggested, wanting nothing more than to look after him during this time. Abner was definitely struggling to look after himself and so Eddie was more than willing to help.
 
Abners heart stuttered as Eddie offered to take him in. He nodded immediately, burrowing in closer. "Yes, I'd love that, please," He pleaded gently. He hesitated a moment, however, and sat back to peek up at Eddie through his hair. "It's just..." Abner looked away. "Eddie, I won't want to leave. You shouldn't..." Abner sighed, pulling away just a bit to sit beside Eddie instead. "You shouldn't take me with you if you aren't absolutely sure you want me around."

Abner folded his hands in his lap, staring at them intently. "It's just... this isn't the first time we've been here, Eddie. Do you remember when we were teenagers?" He asked. "Cara was at camp. We stayed out in the treehouse in the woods behind your parents house. We were watching the stars, half asleep. I don't even remember why, but... we kissed," Abner smiled sadly at the memory. "I was nervous, the day after, but also a little excited. For a week, I just... I waited, watching, hoping, but... you acted like nothing had happened. Nothing had changed. I thought... I was confused, and eventually I just... it had to have been a mistake, you hadn't meant to, I was still just... nothing more than that lost little kid trailing home after Cara from the wrong side of the tracks,"

Abner sighed, pulling his feet up under him and picking up a pillow to hold in his lap. "It... was the same when... you left," Abner's voice grew softer. "It seemed... it seemed so easy for you. I know we agreed, I couldn't blame you. I wanted to, I wanted to forget, to be mad at you. But I just... couldn't. I've just... always blamed myself. I'm not... enough. I've never been enough." He admitted his insecurities shyly, needing to get them out of the way before he let Eddie take him anywhere. Abner's heart couldn't take it if Eddie decided to leave him behind again.
 
Eddie smiled as Abner took him up on his offer, but was quick to shake his head at his comment. "Of course I'm sure. I've never been more sure of anything ever. I'm here now and I always will be if you need. I'm never leaving again. I've learnt now to follow my heart and not my head. Leaving was a terrible mistake and I never want to put that pain on you ever again." Eddie told him truthfully, hoping he would believe him. Eddie didn't blame the man if his trust was broken. He was shocked that Abner was even willing to give him a second chance.

As Abner reminisced about their times as kids, Eddie sat there, following his every word as he relayed it in his head. He didn't want to give Abner excuses as to why he hadn't brought up their first kiss again. Truthfully Eddie had been too scared. Scared that Abner didn't feel the same, scared at how his parents were going to react to them, and most importantly, scared that it would ruin their relationship somehow. Eddie had been a coward then, and a coward for most of his life, but he wanted nothing more than to change that now.

Eddie frowned a little as Abner spoke about his insecurities. He was glad to heat that Abner hadn't been mad, but it broke Eddie's heart to think that Abner thought he wasn't enough. "You're more than enough Abner. You were my best friend for so long. How could I forget that?" He looked deeply into Abner's teary eyes and brought his hand out to hold Abner's, squeezing it reassuringly.
 
Abner tried to listen to what Eddie was saying, trying to take comfort in Eddie's reassurances that he had no intentions of leaving again. Abner just... felt so scared, it felt like his heart was twisted in his chest. Being with Eddie often had the effect of being both the easiest thing in the world, and also the hardest. Abner was so used to pushing his feelings aside, of trying to shoulder on alone, that he found being truly vulnerable like this... terrifying.

He looked up as Eddie spoke, his tears spilling over again as Eddie promised he was more than enough. His lip quivered and he shifted, leaning into Eddie and hiding his face in the older mans neck. Abner let out a shaky sigh. "Maybe... maybe we could be again," He offered shyly, though he hesitantly slid his hand over Eddie's knee as well. "A-and, um... maybe... maybe we could be more..." Abner almost managed, biting his lip hard as his voice trailed off..
 
Eddie loved holding Abner and hadn't felt this much at peace in years. He would forever regret running away from his problems and just wanted to prove to Abner that he was there to stay now. At Abner's words, Eddie paused, thinking them over in his head. Abner wanted them to be more than what they were before and the man wasn't quite sure how to feel about it. Of course he wanted Abner. He wanted him more than anything. But he was shocked at how easily Abner had come back, even after all of the pain Eddie put him through. How could Abner be so forgiving? Eddie thought for a second that it might have been a trick, but no man could fake the tears that were running down his face. "O-of course." he stammered, suddenly aware of the tears that were running down his own face. He wiped them quickly with his free hand. "You d-don't know how long I've been waiting to hear you say that." He held Abner's head against his chest, just happy to be there for a while with him.

When they made it back to Eddie's house, Eddie carefully led Abner through the door. They were quickly greeted by Eddie's ginger tabby cat and the man giggled as it rubbed up against his legs, eager to be fed some dinner. "This is Ginger." Eddie told Abner as they walked towards the couch. Ginger followed them, purring loudly. "He doesn't mind strangers, so may want to sleep with you tonight if that's okay." Waving his wand, Eddie summoned a blanket and pillow. He tucked Abner in before feeding Ginger and heading to bed.
 
Abner let out a content sigh, cuddling into Eddie. Abner wouldn't say he wasn't in pain. He still missed Cara dearly. But for the first time in... years, Abner felt like he might be okay. He shut his eyes, content to rest against Eddie. He had truly missed this, just the closeness and the warmth and the familiar smell of Eddie's cologne. He smiled shyly as Eddie agreed, unsure what they'd even agreed to but happy all the same.

Before he knew what had happened, they'd gathered a few of his things, locked up, and left for Eddie's house. Abner was surprised by the cat that greeted them, leaning down to pet the tabby and smiling warmly. Why had he never thought of getting a pet? Almost just as quickly, Abner found himself tucked in on the couch while Eddie headed off to bed. Abner laid there for a few hours, unsure what he was doing.

Eventually, feeling impossibly cold, Abner threw off the blanket and padded back to Eddie's room. Abner was too tired and too chilled to care anymore. Eddie was back. And sure, Abner was still terrified that Eddie was going to leave again, that Abner wasn't good enough, that his desperate wish that Eddie might ever love him was just an impossible dream. But right now, Eddie was with him, and Abner had been alone for too long.

He slipped quietly into the room, conjured himself into some light pajamas, and crawled over Eddie and under the covers, burrowing into Eddie's arms and against his chest. It felt both foreign and so sweetly familiar all at once. Abner sighed gently, forty years of tension slipping away as he finally relaxed. He shut his eyes, almost immediately starting to doze off in the blessed warmth that was Eddie Kane.
 
It was hard for Eddie to fall asleep as he thought about what had just happened. After all those years Abner had forgiven him. The loss of Cara had upset them both, but now they were going to start a new life together. One where they could just pick up from where they left off. It was surreal how easy it was. Many emotions flooded through him, making him unable to even close his eyes. As he felt Abner crawl into the bed beside him, he let it happen, taking Abner into his arms, knowing that his dreams would not even be able to beat this moment.
 
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