Closed A Captain's Word

[Rory Fergusson]

It was likely that it had been building in his mind for a while, but the reality of his situation seemed to be something that with the note from his brother and the rose that had joined it were finally becoming real. He was sure that his brother would be fine - they’d been apart for most of his life with going to school - so he wasn’t worried about him, apart from the normal amount any brother would be, but he seemed to finally worry about him. In the last semester it had been about decided for sure that this was his path, in thinking about and trying to organise himself to be sure that was what he wanted to do. Now he was beyond that, having made his choice, sealed his fate, now the reality hit him. His brother’s note of admission that he would miss him brought to reality the future he knew was coming, was planning for but had not been facing. Rory was going to leave school and when he did he’d lose the last semblance of what his life had been. He would be left to fend for himself in the world with little clue about how one even went about it. He would be cut off from his family, cut off from his home, cut off from everything he had ever known.​

​

But he’d picked that path. He had chosen to do that, but the loss he felt because of it was seemingly growing, and it didn’t help that nothing about his final year was going to plan. He hadn’t yet managed to get on to a team and wouldn’t be able to try until he graduated, where was he going to live? How was he going to live? Rory had decided in the end that maybe Odette was right, maybe he needed to talk to someone who wasn’t Styx. Who wasn’t a friend. Who he could actually tell what had happened to. So there he found himself at the library stood in front of the counsellors door, his hand hovering over knocking. She’d laugh him out of there surely? She'd surely tell everyone so they could laugh? She was surely going to agree with his parents? Or maybe she had heard about his reputation and didn’t help him because of that, which maybe he would deserve. But he had to talk to someone, at the very least to ask her to look out for Aonghas. Rory he knew his brother would do the right thing by their family and not contact him again once the school year ended. He was the big brother, he should've been around to look after him, to stay with him over school breaks, to send him stuff whenever he needed it. It had been their eldest sister who’d looked after Rory for the years and it would be Aonghas who would in turn do it for their youngest sibling who were just five - oh Rory doubted Liusaidh would even remember him in a few years, god he’d miss her. But Rory wouldn't be able to and Aonghas would be without him. So Rory told himself he was doing this for Aonghas, all for him and not because the weight of everything just sat like lead on his shoulders. Rory knocked on the door and waited to see if this woman would be as helpful as Odette had assured him​

 

[Maria Madison]

It was rare for Maria to find a moment free of paperwork, and she always cherished those times. It always felt in her job like there was more to be done, more to worry about, and there was a lot of relief in reaching the end of a pile. Maria knew the peace would be temporary, but it was satisfying nonetheless. She was in the middle of pouring herself a cup of tea when she heard a knock at her door, and Maria switched her focus immediately. No time for rest when someone needed her help. Setting the cup down, she crossed the room quickly, opening her office door, and gave the boy a warm, reassuring smile. "Hi, how can I help you?" She asked, opening the door wider for him to step inside if he didn't feel comfortable talking where anyone could see him.

 

[Rory Fergusson]

There had been half a hope that maybe, just maybe she might not even be there and he could leave without having said anything to her. That would be as good as speaking to her, half the effort of trying to, no one could complain that he hadn’t tried, he could at least say he'd tried. But that didn’t happen, the door swung open and he was met with a woman, who had a warm and reassuring smile. He stood awkwardly glancing between the empty space of her office and the rest of the library, in truth he didn’t particularly want to be seen by anyone. Rory half nodded, half shrugged as he entered the room, ”Aye, Odette said ye couldnae tell anyone what wis said here if ah asked ye no tae,” it was meant mostly as a question, asking the woman to confirm that she couldn’t tell people unless he maybe asked but he could admit it came out harsher than he would’ve liked. He stood awkwardly at the centre of the office and scratched the back of his head nervously glancing anywhere but at the woman herself, ”She said ye were a good person tae talk tae,” ​

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There were so many worries and thoughts whirling around his head, so much going on. The last few months had been increasingly lonely and isolating as Rory desperately tried to understand where exactly he'd gone wrong, of what on earth he was going to do. The realisation in the last few weeks of just how much he had lost, of how much he was losing and how alone in the world Rory found himself. ”Ah cannae keep it all in my head anymare, but ah cannae tell ye unless ah know ye willnae tell anyone else,” Rory looked at the woman, unable to keep the weariness and near pleading out of his voice. He knew he was probably overreacting, that others would think his problems dumb and silly, so minuet and inconsequential in comparison with others, but Rory couldn’t hold it in anymore, he just needed someone to give him a chance and hopefully listen. Perhaps she would laugh and dismiss him and his problems.​

 

[Maria Madison]

Maria closed the door behind the boy as he entered her office, getting the impression that he didn't particularly want anyone knowing what he had to talk about in here. That impression was confirmed as soon as he spoke, and Maria nodded, gesturing to the comfortable chair she kept for her clients as she returned to her own seat. It was a bit touching that Odette was referring friends to her, but Maria tried not to dwell on that, focusing on the boy in front of her. "That's correct." She said seriously, waving her wand to activate the quill that took notes for her, which floated into action beside her as she settled into her seat. "I take client privacy very seriously. Everything that you say to me in this room will stay between us, with two exceptions. If I think you're in immediate danger of hurting yourself, or someone else, I'm legally obligated to inform your Head of House, so that appropriate measures can be taken to keep everyone safe. Beyond that, you have my promise of absolute discretion. You can talk to me about anything you like, and it will remain strictly between the two of us." Maria had no way of knowing what the boy was so concerned about keeping private, but she wanted to make sure he knew he could be comfortable talking to her with no worries. "So what did you need to talk about?"

 

[Rory Fergusson]

Rory sat down in the chair the woman had gestured to, neither settling nor making himself comfortable, he thought for a moment in silence while just keeping his gaze on hers until he found a way to start. ”Erm, listen ah’ve a wee brother, Aonghas, he’s a first year Hufflepuff, and ah’ve done a few ‘hings in ma school career and at hame tae p1ss some folk aff. Ah’d really like someone tae jist watch oot fae him, nothin’ a’ve done should affect him. Ah dinnae 'hink he'd go tae ma parents if somethin' did happen especially if it wis tae dae wae me,” Rory said, he was sure that this woman got the odd request for someone to look out for siblings when the other graduated but Rory had annoyed a fair amount of people, and his choices with his family likely would mean that he’d fall out of contact with his brother easily and wouldn’t be able to help him out as much as Rory had always planned. As Bonnie had done for him when he’d come to New Zealand, Rory had intended to for Aonghas and Aonghas would likely then do for Liusaidh, it shouldn’t be Aonghas that suffers because Rory had to decide against his family. ​

​

”Ah wis supposed to look out fae him while he settles here, be the one he comes tae fae books, stays wae o’er the holidays, deal wae problems and stuff, even after ah graduate, but ah’m no gonnae be able tae dae that anymare, ah just need someone at school tae keep an eye on him. He’s ma wee brother, ah cannae have somethin’ happen tae him cause ae the choices ah’ve made. He’s only a wee lad ye know?” Rory had both the fallout with his parents and the interaction with Tristan in mind, both of them could indirectly affect Aonghas. They shouldn’t. Rory didn’t know when or if he’d see his brother after he graduated, he needed to be certain someone would be looking out for him. He wanted explain why he wouldn't be able to but Rory wasn’t sure if he could actually say what had happened. It was just better to have someone looking out for his brother at school who his brother could come to if something happened and because it was perhaps to do with Rory he didn't want to tell their parents. ​

 

[Maria Madison]

Maria had heard requests for help from people concerned about younger siblings before, and teenagers being cagey about their actions was nothing new to her. She studied the boy's expression as he spoke, listening carefully. It was clear that he was being very sincere about his concern, but his reticence to explain why made it difficult for her to know exactly where to start helping him. "Well, I'm glad that you're concerned about your brother." Maria began, choosing her words carefully as she spoke. "It's clear that he's very important to you. I want to know more about the kind of trouble you're talking about though... and why you think you won't be able to care for him yourself. Is it just because you're going to be graduating this year, or is something else going on?"

 

[Rory Fergusson]

Rory fiddled with his hands a little nervously, he hoped both that she wouldn’t press it and that she would maybe. He needed a reason, an opening to talk about it, but would accept if she just agreed to look out for his brother and leave it at that. The boy listened as she spoke. He couldn’t help the almost relief as she seemed to focus a little less on his brother and perhaps more on what had brought this on in Rory. He couldn’t help the little, short lived smile at the world think, when he knew he couldn’t. Aonghas was smarter than he was, he knew after this year he would just have to say his goodbyes and wish the boy a good life. He gave a little shrug, this was his opening, he had to take it. The words sat so heavy in his mind and he was finally given a real opportunity to talk openly about it, ”Erm, so like ah’m fae an old magical family, tradition is very important fae us….them,” the boy corrected himself, knowing that he needed to eventually stop referred to himself as part of that wider family unit, since he was no longer a part of it. ​

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He picked those words since, if this woman knew anything about traditional magical families she could probably work out what it meant. ”Ah decided ah didnae want that life anymore and ma da..ma parents kicked me out, disowned me,” he uttered the last words quietly, keeping his gaze firmly on his hands. He could only think of that fight, the argument, the yelling, the fact that for a moment before his mother had intervened he thought his father might actually punch him. Rory remembered the night so clearly, packing up his things and leaving, spending the night wandering around until he picked up his brother the next day to head to school, standing at the edge of road unwilling to see anyone from his family again. The boy shook his head hoping to cast the memories back a bit. ”So, ah cannae take care ae him, even if ah coulda wae ma current situation ah wouldnae have been able tae, cause ah dinnae even have a place tae stay once ah graduate,”​

 

[Maria Madison]

Over the years in her career, Maria had developed a sense for when someone had needed to talk about something for a long time but not been able to, and she always took care to pay attention when it came to these stories. Not just to the words the person said, but how they said them. Their body language. As he spoke, Rory looked... pained, defeated, lost. It was clear enough the kind of traditions he was implying his family held, and Maria could see it had taken a lot of strength to step away from that. As Rory continued though, Maria's heart dropped slightly. "Well, we'll make sure to take care of that." She said, tone falling somewhere between firm and reassuring, as she ran through possibilities in her mind. "You're too old for foster care, but there are other options we can discuss. I'll make sure we set you up with somewhere to stay, at the very least until you're able to get set up on your own. I'd like to come back to that at the end of our session, though, and talk about your family more." Maria needed time, to think through a few options, and to learn a bit more about Rory. The easiest solution to his housing problem was to offer him a space at her own house for a while, but Maria had never taken anyone in knowing so little about them before, and she needed to consider the matter. The fact that he was Odette's friend, and that he had rejected his family's traditions spoke to his character, but she wanted to know more about him to figure out what kind of housing solution would be the right fit, as there were a few other boarding options she might be able to put him in touch with. A young man leaving Hogwarts homeless was unacceptable in her eyes, though, and Maria knew she would have to find a solution to this quickly. "So you're worried your family will mistreat your brother because of how they've treated you?" She asked, returning to the earlier subject. "Does he have family at school who would give him a hard time?"

 

[Rory Fergusson]

Rory allowed a moment of brief relief as the woman talked of taking care of it, talking about some of the possibilities that he could have to him in helping handle leaving school. He felt a little relieved at both having been able to say something to someone about it, finally able to talk about it and that she might be able to help him find a place to live. Rory still shook his head a little, a frown reappearing on his face. He didn’t think he particularly deserved the help, after all, he was of age, he had a part-time job he’d be able to pick back up, there would just be a period where’d he’d be unlikely to afford a proper place. He didn’t have to many friends to turn to and he didn’t want to overstep, but he’d figure something out, ”Ah’m of age, ah’ll have graduated, whose gonnae want tae help me. Ah’ll figure somethin’ oot,” he could use any help she could give him, but didn’t want to get his hopes up about it. If his year continued the way it had, he’d get his hopes up for nothing and Rory would just be left to figure it out. It was better to just keep his hopes down, figure something out himself. ​

​

When she spoke again he shook his head, ”Nah, they willnae, so long as he doesnae stray fae their path, he’ll be fine. Ma da always liked him mare,” the boy assured her, ”Ma da never wanted me tae be the heir, he wis just stuck wae me after Mary died. Ah wish the decision tae throw me oot hadnae been so easy fae him tae make but ah wis always the f#ck up,” Rory didn’t meet her gaze, he didn’t often talk about his sister, in fact he didn’t think he’d ever brought it up with anyone at Hogwarts, despite the fact she had died near months before he’d started at the school. He had resented her too much in the beginning, still did a little. He wouldn’t be in this mess if she hadn’t died. ”Mostly ah’m worried about Aonghas bein’ alone in New Zealand, of ma parents geeing him less chance tae make his own mind up aboot our family and havin' no one he can talk tae if he like me decides against the family,” The boy sighed, "I'm worried that ah willnae ever see any ae them ever again, that if somethin' happens tae Aonghas or Liusaidh or any ae them no one will even try tae tell me. Ah know my parents dinnae love me but ah still love them, all ae ma family,"​

 

[Maria Madison]

Maria didn't find Rory's disbelief surprising, but she shook her head firmly. "Plenty of people would want to help." She said reassuringly. "Adults don't stop needing help sometimes just because of their age. The options in terms of public housing are more limited, certainly, but there will always be people willing to lend a helping hand. We can do some research into other excommunicated members of your family if you like, as well as ask around your friends. People are often more than willing to help when you take the first step to reach out." She said softly, giving Rory a reassuring smile.

Maria listened as Rory spoke more about his family, nodding slowly. "Of course you do." Maria said gently once Rory finished speaking. "It's entirely natural to still feel connected to your family, especially your siblings, and those are understandable worries to have. I can assure you that if Aonghas comes to see me I'll make sure he has a safe place to talk through any worries he has about the family." She paused, trying to consider which direction to take this. "It might be a good idea for you to write to Aonghas while he's at school. I don't know if your parents would cut off contact while he's at home, but that's not something they can control here, and I think it's a good idea to stay in contact with him. I don't know how strict your family is about these things, but even if he feels like he can't write back out of family loyalty, it might be helpful for him to know you still care, and have a line of communication with you if he ever needs to talk to someone who knows your family about them. Do you think that would be a good idea?"

 

[Rory Fergusson]

Rory thought about who he could turn to, he knew he could probably ask Flavio, the boy had been his friend since the first day of school, he could crash with him for a little while. Not long, but just until he had worked enough to have money for his own place, that wouldn’t be too long. He didn’t know who else he could turn to, Evelyn was a friend but she had Lucas and Lucas didn’t like him and nor were they the sort of friends that would have that. ”The only family ae could reach oot tae is Graeme, he’s ma half brother, but he lives in Skye, and ah cannae go hame,” the boy told her, ”Ah’ll ask Flavio if ah can stay fae a few weeks, until ah have money fae a place,” he didn’t really want to turn to flavio, he could only think of what all of Flavio’s friends would say about him doing that, they’d always accused him of taking advantage of Flavio, it had been true in the past, which it made more frustrating now when he needed now more than ever, because of the wrongs he’d committed when he was younger. ”If he says naw, ah’ll figure somethin’ oot,” he nodded, he would just have to turn to other people, maybe Andi? They were sort of flirting, she knew a little of what was happening so maybe she’d be inclined to help.

The teen nodded in understanding as she spoke, he would make sure to mention her to Aonghas, just so his brother knew that she was there and could be someone he goes to. He didn’t know how his brother felt towards his family or what long term plans Aonghas might have or how those might change but he was more than willing to at least tell him about this woman in case anything ever happened. He thought hard about what she was saying. He had honestly just thought it would be easier to never contact Aonghas again, easier for them both because he knew that Aonghas would never send him anything back. He didn’t want to send a letter than could jeopardise his brother’s position. He knew his parents loved Aonghas, but if he was still talking to him, they might get angry with him, throw him out too or find Rory and ban him from it. ”Ach, ah dunno,” the boy replied with a sigh, ”Ah ‘hink it would be good so aonghas knows ah’m here if he needs me, but if ma parents find oot aboot it, then it could get ma brother and maybe me in a lot ae trouble. Ma da wis really angry when he kicked me oot, ah dinnae ‘hink he’d get violent wae Aonghas o’er it but ah’m no his son anymare,” Rory shrugged a little. It would probably be better, maybe the odd letter. Just to let him know he was still alive. ”It might be worth it though, if ma brother just knows ah’m still here. Could ah address them tae ye? Maybe if the letters are here via ye, there’s less chance ae ma parents finding oot aboot it,” ​

 

[Maria Madison]

Maria listened as Rory spoke more about his options, relieved that there were a few people he could go to. She nodded understandably when he said he couldn't go back to Scotland, but if there were local friends he could stay with, that would hopefully ease his situation. "That's a good plan." She said gently, relieved. Pausing, she picked up a scrap of parchment and quill from her desk, and quickly scribbled her contact details on it, handing the scrap to Rory. "If you ever find yourself without options though, you can always contact me. I hope it won't come to that, but you'll always have something to fall back on, alright?" She said gently, hoping the extra safety net would ease his situation somewhat.

Maria hadn't known how her recommendation to write to his brother would go over, and listened carefully to Rory's response, nodding as he spoke. "I don't want to put either of you in any danger, if there's any risk of violence I would advise you to err on the side of caution. I'll leave you to be the judge of what's safe, since you know your father." She said gently. "But if you send any letters for him to me, I would be happy to pass them on, as long as he's happy to recieve them."

 

[Rory Fergusson]

Rory knew he would have to find Flavio after this, he hoped that it would work out in his favour, even just a little bit. Just somewhere for him to go. He was a little confused as the woman picked up some paper and scribbled something down before handing it to him. He looked at it and frowned a little, why would she open her home to him. Even if it was a last resort, she was opening up her home to him if he really needed it. She didn’t know him. He pushed down the odd feeling that him having this gave him. It was truly a safety net to him, but it didn’t make it any easier really. He had something to fall back on, it was always good to have something. He hoped he would never have to use it, but it was nice to know if everything went horribly wrong he might have at least one place to turn to.

Rory nodded a little, he didn’t want to cause anything in his family, but he thought it might be decent to at least let his brother know he was still alive, in case his brother might need his help. The boy just nodded, ”Ah’ll tell him,” Rory said, he wasn’t sure he’d actually do it, but much like the little address on the piece of paper he now held it was just in case. ”Thanks fae listenin’, Odette wis right tae suggest ah dae this,” Rory ran his hand tiredly and sighed a little. There was a little bit of relief felt in his shoulders, he knew things wouldn’t be easier, he knew that talking about it wouldn’t have solved his situation but at least he knew what he needed to do, had a little better idea of what sort of things he needed to do. It had surprisingly helped. ”Aye, thanks,” he got to his feet and gave a weak little smile and held out a hand to her, to thank her for the help before leaving. ​

 

[Maria Madison]

Maria nodded, glad that Rory seemed more settled with a plan in mind. She smiled warmly when he thanked her. "I'm glad I was able to help." She said gently, getting to her feet when Rory did, and returned his handshake. "Good luck with everything in your future. I hope you're able to figure out something stable soon." She said sincerely, meeting his eyes. "But if you ever need to contact me, feel free. And if your brother ever needs help, you can be certain I'll do everything I can for him." She added, wanting to reassure Rory on the point he had come in about in the first place.