Closed A Begrudging Connection

Cameron Roswell

7th Year | Hurt Them Before They Hurt You
 
Messages
400
OOC First Name
Kris
Blood Status
Half Blood
Relationship Status
Single
Wand
Straight 9 1/2 Inch Rigid Willow Wand with Thestral Tail Hair Core
Age
7/2044 (17)
Cameron knew his patrols with Aine weren't exactly going to be the highlight of his week but after the fight with Isadora it was a relief to have some time just to think. And he had plenty of time to think, walking around the darkened corridors. He didn't even need to pretend that hard to be ignoring Aine, mind still ticking furiously over all the things he could have said to Isadora, indignant rage at the things she'd said to him after she picked the fight in the first place. It was all comically unfair, much like being paired up with his current patrol partner.

"Doesn't it just drive you crazy sometimes? People just think whatever they want to think no matter what you say like, why even bother," he blurted out in a huff, glancing at Aine before going back to trying to look like he was ignoring her. He'd managed to work himself into a proper sulk now but the silence had Cameron chasing his thoughts in circles and he'd rather say something, even if it was proper stupid, than keeping doing that (or take up Aine's stupid offer to chatter about whatever dumb thing she'd mentioned at the prefect's meeting). Besides, if anyone knew about saying dumb things in front of other people, it'd be Aine.
 
Patrols were a waste of time, in Aine's opinion. A school for magic could certainly use better security than exhausting their 15 to 18 year old students, who needed the extra sleep and study time more than most. Maybe they were just supposed to lose energy so they wouldn't question anything. Still, it wasn't like she did more than awkwardly not talk to Cameron and occasionally tell off over ambitious first years. Sometimes she wanted to talk, just for the sake of having someone to talk to who wouldn't pull punches, and for the sake of companionship, but instead she just silently argued with herself, brain playing out unrealistic situations and going over classwork.

As such, Aine was silently grateful when Cameron spoke, as annoying as he could be. She was all ready to argue with him, opening her mouth as though she was about to say something in retaliation, but paused, thinking for a moment. "...all the damn time," Aine admitted, briefly glancing at Cameron before looking away. "Like, you do everything to prove yourself and try and change, and no matter what people will just attach their first impression to you, so what's the point?" She scuffed her foot across the ground, biting her tongue once more.
 
Camron was already braced to argue with Aine, hackles preemptively raised as they tended to be around her, so they both ended up staring blankly, open-mouthed, at each other for a moment as she first answered. Agreeing with Aine wasn’t something Cameron really knew how to deal with, and he looked away quickly, clearing his throat even as he nodded along with her.

It’s like they’ve already made up their minds and if I don’t play along then suddenly I’m the assh*le,” said sourly, risking another glance at Aine. It was tempting maybe, to consider that he’d done exactly the same thing to her at times, but he quickly dismissed the thought. He barely had enough room in his head right now for his own problems, he didn’t need to try to conceptualize Aine as a multi-faceted human being either right now. Not in one night. “Or like, I’m not allowed-“ He started again, irritation letting him skim past the potential embarrassment of admitting it, though not without some hesitation still, “-Not allowed to have feelings or something,” he finished, voice dropping to his typical mutter as he shoved his hands in his robes. “Think we’d get in trouble if we just jinxed the next kid we see out after curfew?” He offered after a moment, suddenly feeling all to vulnerable and wanting to change the subject quickly.
 
Should she have apologised? Aine half considered it, but she knew doing it would make this far more awkward than it already was. Aine knew she'd been unfair to Cameron, and although she was partially in the mindset of 'well he totally deserves it', she was also going through a lot of self-reflection and mental self-flagellation. Which wasn't much different to usual, but turning sixteen seemed to amplify it all. "'Course not. If you have feelings, then people get the responsibility of knowing they've hurt them and feel bad about it when they'd rather not." An apology sat stuck in her throat, but just couldn't quite form. Maybe he'd just get the general vibe and realize. Maybe she needed to study legilimency to transfer what she meant to people without having to put it into words.

"I mean, I won't tell any professors if you don't..." Aine started, slowly looking back up with a sly smirk. "Trip jinx, some kind of verbal warning from a dark corner, send them crying back to their dorms? Tell 'em it's the poltergeist." Aine put her hands behind her back, affecting a look of nonchalance and silently entirely relieved for the subject change. Even with the 'I'm sorry for having lashed out at you over the past five years' on the tip of her tongue.
 
Cameron glanced at Aine, quickly cutting his eyes away so he wouldn't have to deal with what he was sure would be a period of incredibly awkward eye contact. Not for the first time he wished his hair was longer so he could hide behind it like he'd seen Margo do when they were younger.

Usually, when Aine said stuff like that, Cameron was obligated to make fun of her; she always took herself so seriously, but maybe just this one he could let it slide and actually talk to her like a human. Not everything she said was terrible, actually. Not all the time. "Yeah," he eventually managed gruffly, hunching his shoulders.

It was a relief when Aine took the bait to switch topics, as much as Cameron needed to vent he didn't think he could have a serious heart to heart with someone like Aine for more than 5 minutes without needing to check if he'd been confunded, but at least it'd been kind of nice for those 5. "Really, you wouldn't immediately tell on me?" He challenged her dubiously, looking pointedly at Aine's prefect badge with a raised eyebrow. "Power has changed you, Aine." Cameron shook his head in disbelief, the temptation to lace his comments with more scathing insults lingered, but he couldn't shake the feeling that she'd offered him an olive branch by hearing him out and as much as he wanted to, he didn't immediately need to trash it just to win some stupid points against her or something. "I doubt you even need to speak to the first years honestly, some of them are ready to cry if you just look at them," he added with a shrug. "Though maybe that's just a Slytherin thing."
 
Aine shrugged, feeling a little strange about this but trying not to look the gift horse in the mouth. Which was easier said than done, as she was paranoid enough to think that every olive branch came with a knife. But her personal project gave her plenty of time for soul searching, that and seemingly that was the point of Arithmancy, Ancient Runes and Divination. Know the self, which made Aine think magic was inherently selfish. Though she had been thinking that for years, in all honesty.

"It's my teen rebellion," Aine said, as earnestly as one could say something so embarrassing. She attempted to flip her shorter hair once more, and just looked like she was having a neck twitch. She sighed. Really, Aine knew she'd never be cool or pretty or interesting, as much as she wanted to try to be. "Hufflepuffs are worse. I managed to make a third year and a fifth year run away from me scared. Firsties would probably just scream. So, why not just let the power corrupt me further? Either break the rules with prefect freedom or rule with an iron fist like Celia, something something it's better to be feared than loved," she joked, hating how honest she could be with Cameron even when she tried to bury it under poor humour. She didn't know why it was easy, but she would have to keep working on locking down her mind.
 
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