What it's like

W

Willow Holland

Well-Known Member
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OOC First Name
Ana V
Wand
Shedua Wood Wand with a string of Thestral tail feather 9 1/2 inch
Willow made a promise to herself to be a bit more social. Only thing was she didn't know where to start. It seemed like all the people here already had thier set of friends. It wasn't like this when her mother moved around in the U.S. She used to be able to fit in anywhere, all she had to do was show up. That was before she lost all the light in her life. Well not all the light. She had her guiter. She hadn't felt like playing it in a while. Willow sat by a tree

Willow started to strum on it while keeping a beat with her foot. A song started to come out after a bit of playing around with it. It always happened that way. Things just came to her as she played. Foretunetly for her it wasn't something overly emo. She had been afraid that if she started to play then the song would be something tragic to her. It wasn't it was tragic to others.

"We've all seen the man at the liquor store beggin' for your change
The hair on his face is dirty, dreadlocked and full of mange
He ask the man for what he could spare with shame in his eyes
Get a job you f****n' slob's all he replied

God forbid you ever had to walk a mile in his shoes
'Cause then you really might know what it's like to sing the blues
Then you really might know what it's like
Then you really might know what it's like
Then you really might know what it's like
Then you really might know what it's like

Mary got pregnant from a kid named Tom who said he was in love
He said don't worry about a thing baby doll I'm the man you've been dreamin' of
But three months later he said he won't date her or return her call
And she sweared god damn if I find that man I'm cuttin' off his *****
And then she heads for the clinic and she gets some static walkin' through the doors
They call her a killer, and they call her a sinner, and they call her a w***e

God forbid you ever had to walk a mile in her shoes
'Cause then you really might know what it's like to have to choose

Then you really might know what it's like
Then you really might know what it's like
Then you really might know what it's like
Then you really might know what it's like

I've seen a rich man beg
I've seen a good man sin
I've seen a tough man cry
I've seen a loser win
And a sad man grin
I heard an honest man lie
I've seen the good side of bad
And the down side of up
And everything between
I licked the silver spoon
Drank from the golden cup
Smoked the finest *****
I stroked the baddest dimes at least a couple of times
Before I broke their heart
You know where it ends
Yo, it usually depends on where you start

I knew this kid named Max
He used to get fat stacks out on the corner with drugs
He liked to hang out late at night
Liked to get s*** faced
And keep pace with thugs
Until late one night there was a big gun fight
Max lost his head
He pulled out his chrome .45
Talked some s***
And wound up dead
Now his wife and his kids are caught in the midst of all of his pain
You know it crumbles that way
At least that's what they say when you play the game

God forbid you ever had to wake up to hear the news
'Cause then you really might know what it's like to have to lose
Then you really might know what it's like
Then you really might know what it's like
Then you really might know what it's like
To have to lose..."

Willow finished feeling a bit better that she had actually played but not all that better. She sighed, at least she was outside and not in the common room. She wondered if anyone would come out here as cold as it was. Maybe but not to her. She wasn't good company. Probobly would never be. She wondered who Abbey was doing with that Theo boy. If she hadn't stopped her Willow would have called the little boy out. Probobly not a good idea though. Willow tucked a strand of brown hair behind her ear then started to stum again. This time random notes but nothing with lyrics.
 
Brandon had been wandering about all day, no classes at all and all his assignments up to date meant he could do just about anything he wanted. And all he wanted to do was climb a tree. He made his way down to the lawn and did just that, it took him no time at all to make it to the high strong branches that could hold his weight no problem. He shuffled his body down the length of the branch as if he would fall asleep there, instead he just closed his eyes and thought about his time so far at Hogwarts.

His reverie was rudely interupted by the strumming of a guitar and the lyrics of a rather brash song. He very slowly opened his eyes and listened, the girl could sing but he hoped she would soon stop and go away, leave him to his thoughts again. When the song did come to its anti-climatic ending, Brandon resisted the urge to clap loudly. About to settle himself down once more he was maddened that the girl began to strum on the guitar again. He sat up and lowering himself down to the ground he landed infront of her with a thump.
"Do you have to continue playing that thing?" he asked her, he hadn't meant to be rude but of all the trees she had to pick it had, had to be the one with him in it.
 
Willow rolled her eyes and looked way. This boy was not even worth her time. But she did answer. "No I don't have to keep playing it but want to so I will." She said in her new monotone of a voice. She kept plucking at the strings in an aimless tune. She leaned back on the tree more as if to make herself comftble then crossed her legs at the knee. She looked at him with eyes that had nothing but dispare in them. It seemed some how worse than empty. Her face dared the new boy to say something else to her. It wasn't his lawn, it wasn't his tree, he had nothing to say to over her playing out here. It was a free country and she could do as she pleased.
 
"You're really stroppy aren't you? I mean the song you chose to sing was a bit mental wasnt' it?"
he glared at her shoving his hands deep into his pockets. He couldn't place her from anywhere and chalked her down to not worth much of his attention anyhow. Other than her annoying guitar playing, actually more her annoying song choice was interupting his solitude. He figured she was such a big girls blouse, the whole attitude was so down pat. Out to get the world, yadda yadda yadda. Brandon was intolerable of these rebellious, moody teenage girls. Hormonal to say the least, he seemed to be bumping into lots of them lately. Would this one also brake down in tears, or be terrified of him for no reason? Highly unlikely, this one he figured would be all 'I'm bored with you now' type of thing or in his face completely. Girls were so predictable, mentally so.
 
Willow wasn't anything of the sort. If anything she was empty of all but misery. She looked right on though the boy's glare with no emotion at all. "The song I chose to sing. Well it's a fact isn't it. People choose to do things without thinking simply because they think they are right. Mistakes are made then other people have to pay for them or the person who did it even though they are a good person ends up condemned for life. All that there is left is to pray that it does not happen to them because they the people that stand in judgment are the ones that are being judged." She said. Willow never broke her monotone. She didn't cry. Tears where reserved for her friend.

Abbey came to minded and Willow softened a bit. She wounded what the girl was doing. Probably putting on her show of happiness and good health to the world. Willow wished she could do so as well but she couldn't. Honesty was her best quality and her biggest weakness. "Like you right now calling me stroppy when you know nothing about me, not that I would tell you anyway. Not worth the breath really." She said then changed her the tune she was playing a bit. Her fingers seemed to be working on their own but it sounded good.
 
Brandon tried to follow what she was saying but it all seemed to loop in on itself, he was confused. Not least by the fact that she didn't behave as he had thought she would. He scooched down on his haunches and looked at her. The tune she played now wasn't so bad much to his relief. Part of him recognised her from a few of his classes but he didn't pay too much attention to anyone really so it wasn't in the slightest bit surprising to him that he didn't really know her.
"I guess some people do things without thinking, others put a lot of thought in before doing anything at all. Aren't you a bit young to be so morbid though?"
He wasn't intending to be rude now but the girl before him intrigued him and he wanted to know a bit more about her.
 
Willow shrugged, he made a good point. "Too much sometimes to the point where nothing ever gets done. Too bad really, sometimes the idea could do someone some good." She said thinking of what it would have been like if the Aurors had been a bit faster in finding them. "How old do you have to be before you can be morbid? Things bring about changes sometimes for the worse." She said. She looked at him then sighed. "Willow Paradox if it pleases." She said a bit lazily. She normally didn't have the energy to introduce herself but the boy had stuck around long enough to her drone on so he had the right to at least know her name. Willow looked down at the strings for a bit deciding to do a bit of a complicated rift. Her dark brown hair came down around her face but she didn't bother to pick it back up again.
 
"You got me there" he laughed, "maybe there isn't a set age for morbid-dom but there should be. At our age we should be having fun, exploring the world around us, having a blast. Getting up to mischief, meeting people and not having any expectations of others that always seems to let a person down" he laughed not being able to help himself, he sat down on the grass properly crossing his legs as he did so. That was probably the most he had said to anyone in the last few weeks.

Brandon held out his hand to her, perhaps a bit formal but he didn't really mind.
"Hey Willow, I'm Brandon Coffield" he smiled at her.
 
Willow finally stopped playing. She spread her legs around her gutare and draped her arms over the neck. She reached her right hand across and shook Brandon's. "I've lost it all. All those things you said I wish I could do. But I have no joy other than the sound of the strings." She said her voice waspy. She pressed the gutare closer to herself. This and Abbey where her only true friends. She sniffed. "I noticed that there's is alot of running around as of late. What is going on?" She asked. She locked herself up for so long that she hadn't even noticed that it was ball time already. Not that it mattered. Willow had decided that she was too young for such things. That and with her pin straight hair and withdrawn expression she no hope of ever getting a date.
 
Brandon thought he seemed to be surrounding himself with all the morbid girls of Hogwarts lately, is this what happened when you hid yourself away for insurmountable periods of time? Did you get left with all the lonely depressed people to make friends with? He hoped not, he couldn't go around feeling sorry for every girl he met. He would soon get worn out from it and possibly resentful too.
"What do you mean running around of late?" Brandon had been so secluded in his dorm he wondered if he too had missed something.
 
Willow shrugged thinking of what she meant. There was certenly a change in activity in the school but she wasn't quite sure of what. "An increase the insensate giggling of happy girls, guys looking like they have just seen the ghosts of their dead loved ones that sort of thing. It's getting quite annoying." She said slowly at first but then picked up speed as she remembered what she had observed. Since she had sheltered herself away from everyone all Willow had left was to look at people and the way they acted. "It can't be exams, that would have everyone in a more sedate mood I would guess." She added, noticing that some people looked more unkept than other for it.
 
"Oh you must mean the craziness leading up to the Yule Ball" he smiled, "yeah everyone is pretty much running around like proverbial headless chickens. I've seen a whole bunch of girls over meal times just discussing eye makeup alone. I mean how sad is that?" he grimaced and looked at her quickly, "Sorry, I mean it's probably a big deal for you girls to discuss but well, it's just not a guy thing really".
 
Willow looked up at Brandon then actually laughed. At first softly then it grew. "You..." She held her hand in front of her hand to catch another laugh. "You actually think I would care about something as pointless as the Yule Ball? I think it's completely sad that girls are running around talking to each other about what gown would go best with which shoes. I mean really there are more important things." She said calming down. It should have been clear by the way she was dressed. Willow at the moment had on baggy jeans, washed so many times the color was starting to fade and she was covered in an sweater that looked to be about two sizes to big for her.
 
Brandon pulled up a daisy from the grass before his and tossed it at her.
"See there you go again. We should be enjoying things as tedious yet possibly lots of fun like the Yule Ball and the Halloween Party and any other mad cap event that is on around her. If we worry all the time about the bigger things then we'll forget to enjoy the simpler things and if we don't stop once in a while to enjoy any of it, what's the worrying for at all?" he looked at her now and smiled. He enjoyed the sound of her laughter, she wasn't hard to talk with either. She wasn't a Slytherin which at this particular point in his life he felt grateful for, he seemed to only know Slytherins and had wanted to branch out to some of the other houses. Well this was certainly a start.
 
Willow blocked the daisy with her hand making land on the side of her guitar. "Whatever, things like this bore me actually. I went to the Halloween party though. It's my birthday that day and I though why not. I actually got to meet the boy my friend seems to fancy. Leave it to Abbey to find herself a nice Slytherin boy." She said shaking her head. The whole dating thing was another thing that Willow thought pointless.

Brandon was alright, she guessed. He wasn't put off by her tom boyish looks and he didn't mind her brash words. He had made her laugh also something that she hadn't done in ages. Willow hadn't wanted to laugh in ages. Not since she was taken out of that basement along side her mother's corpse. "I would bet ten gallions and my aunts guilt that you already have a date all lined up." She said rolling her eyes. If this place was anything like HS, boys did not stay single for long.
 
Brandon smiled when Willow mentioned Abbey.
"You mean Abbey Lurken? Slytherin second year Abbey? She is also a friend of mine, recently made sure but still one of the few friends I've made here. So what nice Slytherin guy besides myself?" Abbey hadn't mentioned she was dating, did Willow mean Noah? Surely not, he was way too old for her.
"Belated Happy Birthday then seeing as I didn't know you back then and hadn't bothered to go to the Halloween night. Actually I never bothered last year either and if you must know I didn't bother with the ball last year either" he shrugged his shoulders though, "I'm not dating but myself and another friend are sort of going together to the ball. I'm escorting her but we're not dating. She's really lovely and everything but nope, not dating. You probably worry too much to do the dating thing as well, don't you?" he smiled now, waiting to see her reaction to this one.
 
Willow gave Brandon a half smile. "There has to be nicer Slytherin guys than you. Abbey Lurken is my friend. My only one here. She is the only one I trust enough to hear what keeps me in sorrow. Well I don't think Abbey is dating but she blushing over some guy. Whatever really, dating is so beyond me. I don't think about it often. I mean really like you said. Thies are the years that we are soppoed to be enjoying. Relationships like that bring nothing but tears." She said. Willow didn't particurly care that Brandon was only escorting the girl he was going with. She had only said it to keep the conversation going. Now that she was talking to someone she didn't want it to stop.
 
Brandon eyed her specutively.
"well if you ask me Willow, you don't be doing much enjoying of anything do you? Why don't you just go along anyhow, you never know you might just actually find you're having fun. Abbey will probably go" he didn't know if Abbey was going or not but was glad that Noah hadn't been mentioned. He didn't think that guy was even close to being suitable for dating Abbey. He didn't like Abbey in that sense, she was like a sister to him and ever since she had told him about her parents, he was maddeningly overprotective of her.
"Hmm, dating is beyond you huh? Bet as soon as you find yourself a decent bloke you'll regret having said that" he winked at her.
 
Willow raised an eyebrow. "You didn't know me before. You may have liked me before." She said crypticly. "Yes well point me in the direction of this decent bloke and I will take it back but unless I see him my statement still stands." She said. Willow wouldn't say she didn't enjoy anything. She enjoyed manga and her gutare. Small pleasures that was for sure but still they where there. "I know and if she need me she will know where to find me." She said. Willow when not in the common room she was wondering the halls or in the library. She was spending the time of the Yule Ball though in the tower as far away from the festivity as possible. "That offer stands for you as well." She added. Why not. If things didn't pan out they could talk or just look at the sky. Willow didn't care one way or the other.
 
Brandon looked at her wide eyed but with a mischievous smile on his face.
"You expect me to take you up on that offer after saying you want me to point you in the direction of a decent bloke? Surely the one sitting with you would make you forget that statement".
He felt slightly wounded but another part of him was chuffed that she had thought to include him in the same plans she had laid for her best friend Abbey.
 
Willow laughed softly behind her gutare. "Well really whatever right. I mean if you get tired was watching people spinning around the dance floor then you and Abbey could come find me and we could think up something better to do. Hopfully something that includes butter beer but it can be doen without." She said. This was about the happyest she had felt all year. Willow smirked. "Yeah I said a decent bloke. If your the only one left on the planet I would have to ask you to prove it." She said taking a stab at him. Willow did think that there where a few good guys out there but they where all hidden behind the pigs that gave them all a bad name. She had just felt like joking for once.
 
Brandon laughed heartily at Willow.
"You've wounded me to the quick you know that but somehow I will prove to you that I am a decent bloke. Don't know how I'm going to do it but I will. And FYI Will, I won't be watching people spinning around I'll actually be one of them. Quite a good dancer really, so that's reason enough itself for you to come along isn't it? Get a dance from yours truly".
 
Willow shook her head. "Another reason why I shouldn't go. I can't dance to save my life. I should save your feet the pain." She said with a smirk. Willow used her guitar to prop herself up and sighed. "But if you really want to spend time with me I'll be in the north tower all night. It's better than the Gryffendor common room. Less stuffy." She said the looked around. Willow picked up the flower from where it had landed then tossed it back at Brandon. "You know I have never really been a flowers kind of girl. See around" She joked then made her way back inside. In her baggy jeans and sweater Willow looked formless and genderless. She didn't mind. She wasn't trying to catch the attention of anyone anyway.
 
Brandon caught the flower easily enough and looked at the wilted thing for a long time after Willow had gone. Now why on earth would he consider going to the North Tower when the dance would be in full swing. Something really bad would have to happen like the ball turning out to be a complete flop or something. He doubted it though or at least he hoped it wouldn't be. He stayed put a bit longer enjoying at last the solitude and the peace that it afforded before he too headed back to the castle.
 
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