Closed Unsure

Onyx Derouin

Dramatic- Loyal- Growing- Soft Boi
 
Messages
933
OOC First Name
Jess S
Blood Status
Mixed Blood
Relationship Status
Married
Sexual Orientation
Eternally Smitten
Wand
Cedar Wood, Hippogriff Feather core, 13 1/2 inches
Age
12/23/2033 (27)
Onyx's head was spinning. He had always thought there was never anything Sapphire could ask of him that he wouldn't do. But this- this was such an intense request. And especially now. How could he say yes? How could he say no? He'd met with her for breakfast and he'd been wondering around the flat aimlessly since his return, his mind elsewhere. They were making such good progress, he couldn't say yes. They'd drawn up the plans for their house. It was going to be beautiful, it was going to be home. He was so excited, so eager for the construction to be complete. He and Jamie had been there when they'd first broken ground, when they'd started building. He knew it would take time, but he was hoping that it would be quick. He bit his lip, sitting down at the piano and idly plucking at a few keys. What was he supposed to do? What would he tell Jamie? Onyx sat there, his chin propped in one hand, poking at a few keys without really seeing them.
 
Jamie had errands to run most of the morning, some to do with the new house and others that were just things that needed done. It helped that Onyx had had plans for breakfast and that had gotten him up and out of bed quickly. Why stick around if he wasn't there. But he'd finished getting the last few things for the morning and headed back into the apartment. He magicked the stuff he was carrying to fly to where it needed to and called out, "Baby, I'm home," he wasn't sure if Onyx was back yet, but would always want to greet him. He moved further in, taking off his jacket and shoes and spotted Onyx sitting almost dejectedly at the piano. "Baby? You okay?" he asked, wondering if perhaps the man had just not had a good time with Sapphire. He liked Sapphire enough but was sure she might say things that upset his baby without intending to.
 
Onyx looked up when the familiar voice broke into his thoughts. He let out a shaky sigh. "Jamie," he breathed, standing up and walking over. He leaned in, tense and shaking, and buried his head into Jamie's chest. He clutched at the other mans shirt so tightly his knuckles were white. "Jamie," he managed again, and the first of the tears started to fall. He tried to burrow deeper into his fiancé. He just needed to forget what had happened. Forget Sapphire had asked him. Forget he'd not answered her in any way.
 
Jamie opened his arms almost out of sheer reaction to Onyx approaching him. He wasn't sure why but he just did. He held the man closer, tightly in his arms and just frowned. He wasn't sure what had happened but he couldn't help but think something bad had. "Baby, what's going on? Did Sapphire say something?" His voice was soft, and trying to be as soothing as possible, trying to push out how he was a little worried.
 
Onyx whined loudly, shaking. He pulled back instead of answering, wringing his hands and starting to pace in front of the piano. "She- she did- s-she-" Onyx whined again, pacing faster. What was he supposed to do? "Sapph- Sapphire- she's- she's got a job, it's big, Jamie, it could make her entire career," He tried to explain, his breath coming in short gasps as he paced. "She- she's going deep. So far into the wild- so far, so far-" he ran both hands into his hair, tangling his fingers in the ebony locks. "No contact, too deep- no owls, no calls, cut off," he whimpered, pacing in a smaller circle. "Six months- six- she said it looks like it'll take six months,"

Onyx whined, dropping onto the seat of the piano. He was crying, panicking, hyperventilating. "Sapph- she- she- she wants- me to- she asked- go with her-" He stuttered out, rocking harder. "Can't say no- Can't- Can't say yes- I don't- can't- Jamie," Onyx choked out, crumbling and struggling to pull himself together. What was he supposed to do?
 
Jamie listened in closely as Onyx began telling him about it. At first he thought he was upset about Sapphire leaving, which was understandable, he knew how close Onyx and his twin were, how much they meant to each other and that amount of separation with no contact was probably not something he wanted. But it was the second part that confused him. Why couldn't he say no. Being apart from his baby would hard, but it seemed like a once in a life time opportunity. "Why can't you say yes?" he asked gently, he didn't want to just tell him to go, didn't want to make it seem like he didn't love him or didn't want him around. So he had to ask first.
 
Onyx hadn't been expecting Jamie's answer. He froze, looking up to the other man with wide blue eyes. "What- why can't- you- I-" Onyx stood abruptly and left the room, going to the bedroom and shutting the door harder than he needed to. He was crying fully now. What kind of question was that? The answer was so obvious to him. He fell into bed, grabbing one pillow and curling up around it. He buried his face in another, breaking down and crying out his frustration and confusion. How could he let his sister go alone?

How could he leave Jamie here? They were building a house, there was wedding planning Onyx hadn't even gotten near to doing, he'd been applying for school. He felt torn, and it hurt that he couldn't just give a solid answer, that he didn't know what to do. He was upset with Jamie now, too. Onyx was falling apart and Jamie hadn't even flinched at the thought that Onyx could be gone for half a year. But then, Onyx was already upset. He couldn't tell if he was upset with Jamie or just upset about everything.
 
Jamie had really hoped he wouldn't get this reaction, but Onyx's words and the way he just stood up and moved away he felt like he had somehow said the wrong thing, but Jamie knew all he wanted to do was talk about it. He didn't think there was an easy answer and he didn't have enough information. The man gave a little sigh and then gave Onyx a few moments. Giving him a few minutes to just be alone before he calmly went to their room. he spotted him, curled around a pillow crying. Jamie sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Baby...I didn't mean it like, I don't want you here or I wouldn't deeply miss you, but I just wanted to talk it over. This is something important, something you maybe want to do, and I never want to be the one to tell you what to do, or say that you can't ever do something, I just wanted to talk it over, we're a team," he hoped Onyx was listening. "You mean the world to me, and I'd hate for you to say no to this just because of me and us, we'll still be engaged, you'll still be my baby and I mean, sixth months isn't that long when we'll spend the rest of our lives together," he was rambling a little but he hoped that he wouldn't mind.
 
Onyx didn't hear when Jamie came in the room, but he felt the man sit down. He tried to calm himself down, listening to Jamie speak. Listening to the man helped him calm down. He hiccupped, wiping at his eyes and shifting to sit with Jamie. He still felt small, hurt. "I... I'm just... I'm so torn," he reached for Jamie's hand, wanting his touch. "I don't- I don't want her to go alone," He managed, rocking a little. "But- but our house... we're building a house, I put in an application for university, I haven't- we haven't even put together anything solid for the wedding," Onyx shook his head. "But- but six- six months, thats- that's half a year without you, I don't want to- I don't know if I could-" Onyx let out a shaky sigh, biting his lip.
 
Jamie was pleased when Onyx responded, glad that he was at least listening. He took his hand and nodded as he listed all the reasons why not. "Well, the house won't be ready for at least another 6 or 7 months," he told him. "I can oversee all of that," he assured him, they'd agreed to all the plans so it wasn't like he would be changing anything he'd just be watching as contractors built it. "The application...universities here start in September or October, there would be time and you could just differ for a year," he wasn't sure if that would work, but surely enough money thrown at it would.

"As for the wedding, baby, we could always sign the papers tomorrow and then plan a traditional thing once you get back, that way there's no rush because we'd already be married," he then paused. "As for missing me, baby I would miss you so much but we'd be okay, and you have the necklace, we could charm it for this place, so if it gets too much you'll always be able to come back," Jamie knew the most difficult part would be being apart from him but they could make it. "Now, what are the reasons for going?"
 
Onyx cuddled into Jamie, listening to the man address each of his points. Jamie was right, of course. He and Onyx had already designed everything, they were just letting the Professionals build it. And school could logically wait longer. His heart fluttered when Jamie mentioned getting married tomorrow, and it made him sit up a bit.

He was distracted as Jamie spoke about missing him, and the necklace. Onyx reached up, meaning to brush his fingers gently down Jamie's jaw. "Oh, mon chiot," He murmured. He would have to give the necklace to Sapphire or he would be trying to come home every night. He hesitated as Jamie asked what the reasons for going were. Onyx sighed, tangling his hands in his hair. "Sapphire. This is huge for her. She's never asked me for anything before. And if I don't, she'll just go alone." Onyx felt the tears spring up in his eyes and he looked back to Jamie. "Why does it feel like I have to choose between the two people in the world most precious to me?" He asked, his voice breaking.
 
Jamie watched as Onyx moved, letting him cuddle into him and then reach out to touch him. He was pleased that he was at least listening to him, pleased that he wasn't reacting as he had before. He knew that it took more to explain, they could work on that. "Well, baby, you aren't picking between us, pick her, go with her. We can figure things about us out around it," he said, he knew it was maybe a bit bold, but he thought perhaps the permission the clear instruction from him would help. "I would wait a lifetime for you, so what's six months?" Jamie told him.
 
Onyx bit his lip as Jamie spoke, knowing already he would tell his sister yes no matter how badly it hurt. At Jamie's last comment, however, Onyx's jaw dropped, his cheeks flushed, and his heart fluttered. "Jamie," he breathed. Without thinking Onyx shifted, sitting in Jamie's lap and taking the mans face in his hands. Onyx kissed him eagerly for several long moments before pulling back. Resting his foreheads against his fiancé's, Onyx opened his eyes to meet Jamie's gaze, adoration and love clear on his face. "Did you really mean it, mon chiot?" Onyx asked gently, brushing his thumb over Jamie's cheek. "Could we really marry tomorrow?" He asked, his heart fluttering at just the thought of it.
 
Jamie gave Onyx the space to move into his lap. He leaned into the touch and then the kiss. "Well, of course," he told him. "I would marry you tomorrow or six months from now, it only makes this official on paper," he assured him. "We could just sign the paper tomorrow and then do the fun, fancy stuff after," he told him, with a tone that was sure. He might have to call in a favourite or two to be able to get the stuff ready for the next day if they did do it the next day but he thought that would be more than worth it.
 
Onyx couldn't help but giggle at Jamie's words, pushing the other man back down on the bed almost as soon as he had finished speaking. A few hours passed, and Onyx lay curled up against Jamie. The window was open, a soft breeze keeping him cool. He purred softly, calmed by the steady beating of Jamie's heart beneath his hand. Tomorrow, Onyx would be a Derouin, and in that moment he was sure there was nothing he had ever wanted more in his life. He was Jamie's, always. Onyx's eyes fluttered shut, and the purring quieted as he fell asleep, tucked in against his love.
 

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