Time Lost

[Zander Ellison]

Zander didn't drink, he didn't and after spending an awful evening and night, the man had left the house shortly after dropping his daughter off at school, but rather than lingering around in the house where he felt entirely worse about everything, but it took three efforts to actually leave the house, three attempts before he was able to figure out the strength to actually leave and go physically out, which ended with him sitting at the hogs head not far from where Abby would eventually attend school and he was nursing a drink he had no real intention of drinking, alcohol never made things better, it always made him feel so much worse, and the more he drank the worse he felt, he had to think that this was perhaps a good thing, the only thing that alcohol helped with was making him forget and really that never lasted long enough for it to be worth it. The man didn't drink now, only ever a few drops, but he was nursing a drink so early in the day, with a plate of food he wasn't really hungry for, Zander didn't go out often, if at all, going out with Sanctuari was all he really did aside from the school run and anything his daughter needed.

The man had no joy in going out any more, the world was too loud, too busy and he just didn't fit in, Zander sighed heavily as he leaned forward and placed his head in his hands, letting out long shuddering breaths as he just attempted to control his breathing, as he attempted to calm himself. He was tired, he'd been tired for years, he could feel the heavy weight of his life on his shoulders which stopped him sleeping, no matter how tired he was he could never get more than a couple of hours of sleep and there seemed to be no end to his own exhaustion. The man looked tired, he was thin, bone weary and had hints of stubble on his unshaven face, Zander barely recognised himself in the mirror most days, eventually Zander just decided to leave, knowing there was nothing else for him at this point, in this moment, within this bar, and so he got up and left, taking a coffee to go, the alcoholic drink left untouched, and he ventured out into the world, the bright and seemingly happy world around him, though he couldn't join them. Zander found it difficult to smile most days, he found it difficult to feel any sort of good feelings. He only smiled for Abby, and even then it was becoming increasingly hard and Zander had no way of explaining it, he ran a hand through his hair as he wandered away sipping slowly at the drink in his hand until he found a bench. The man sat down on the bench, leaning forward with his head in his hands, the coffee cup sitting on the ground between his feet.

He couldn't help but wonder how his life had become this, Zander knew he'd once been happy, he knew he had once thoroughly enjoyed life, he'd wanted to make music in school, be a musician, be in a band, he'd had a life, friends, parties, a girlfriend, but that was years ago, what felt like a lifetime ago, he did wonder what most of those people got up to now, but mostly he wished to return to those simpler days where he slept easily, and felt happiness with ease, he didn't like feeling how he did at all.
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[Kyne Katsaros]

Living the life of a Gringotts worker was not all fun and games. Sure, he supported his family, and his wife stayed home and watched their children. Their first child turned to two, then four, then five within a few short years before Kyne decided against having any more, and had the operation done. If he had any more, then he would not be able to afford food on the table. They were not exactly rich, but they were content. Kyne was thinking that he would bring home something to eat for himself and his wife, but apparently, they were out visiting some family, and checking out New Zealand and see if the schools would be good for the twins. He was sure that they would be if they could handle Jayson and Zared. Then again, he received some word that Zared was a little more like him than his mother, but also darker in a sense that was not even his own. Maybe it came from his previous family that he left behind. Whatever the case, it would not be tolerated if he managed to be bringing home someone that wanted to follow the teachings of the former dark lord.

Finding himself into a bar, Kyne almost missed this life, and how he used to work in a bar himself. He walked up to the bartender and asked for a mild drink, since his wife would kill him if he dared to come home and nurse a hangover. Once he received his drink, his eyes looked over the area, before he managed to find someone a little familiar. Kyne thought that he knew him from somewhere. A flashback occurred. Kyne used to have a lot of fun with this guy. The content male approached his really old friend before reaching out to squeeze his shoulder, "Long time no see, Zander Valentine." Kyne was one of the few to have known and found happiness. It was all due to Evangelina, who made him a better person. She also kept his jealousy issues in check, which are almost nonexistent now. "It has been years. How have you been? Hopefully not partying and whatnot anymore." Kyne remembered those days. Up most of the night drinking as soon as he became of age. Of course, one of those times landed him with a son.​

 

[Zander Ellison]

The man had not kept in touch with most of the people he'd gone to school with, most of the people he'd once counted as friends he'd left completely behind after his parents had died, there was no point even thinking about them any more because they didn't matter, they were just some random people who'd once been in his life, they weren't any more and he doubted they would ever be. Since he was so far from where he'd attended school. The man was content to just sit and nurse the drink in front of him thinking of his daughter, of how easily she managed to be free and normal and able to make friends. He couldn't imagine being like that any more, finding joy in such things seemed just abnormal to him now, but he felt like the pressures of the real world were just so crushing she should feel them. But then again she was an eight year old child and he was a thirty one year old man, it was his job to carry that burden and try as he might to protect her from the horrors and trials of the world. The man could barely remember being her age, it felt like a life time ago, hell, even being at school did, it felt like a life time of it's own even separate from him being a child.

The man glanced up from his drink when someone began speaking, only looking towards the source of the voice as they then said his name, his full name and he looked up at him, noting that it took him a beat to remember who this was, and it was just as he said it had been years, yes, he'd known this guy from school, his name escaped him currently, but he knew it would eventually come back to him, he knew he would figure out who this man was, at the question he just nodded, barely remembering the parties he'd attended at school with this man, and it was that Trace guy, "Trace right?" he asked, ignoring the question of how he was, or how he'd been, and though he was smiling as he spoke, it was a fake and barely lingering smile. Fading the exact moment he had finished speaking, "No more parties, no. What about yourself? Doing well I presume?" he asked, his tone was friendly, keeping in with polite conversation despite the heavy exhaustion laced within it, and he was curious about how this man was doing, since it had been years but he just wasn't in the mood for conversation, not that he really ever was, this guy was from a former life one he didn't think he'd ever run into again.
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[Kyne Katsaros]

The former Slytherin narrowed his eyes slightly when Zander avoided the questions. Obviously, not everything had been going well for him, not like it had for Kyne. Kyne did have some ups and downs with his jealousy when it came to Evangelina, but he learned to control it, gave up his forsaken name and joined in her family. Kyne now had plenty of kids, more than enough to handle. His twins were pretty much a handful by themselves, but Jayson and Zared were just as hard to handle. It was a lot like him when he was young. A little bit out of control. Kyne did chuckle at the thought of being called Trace. That was a long time ago. He shrugged his shoulders, “Well, I am going by my first name now. Kyne. I married and became a Katsaros, since her family is a lot more respectable than mine.” Although seemed just as cursed with how crazy some of the members were. He left this bit out since it was more or less pure-blood stuff than anything else. And from what he knew, Zander was not pure, so he would not understand the struggles that someone like him faced.

“I am doing better than I expected. Gringotts official. I work with midgets all day, pretty much. And I come home to a houseful of them. Kids are something else,” Kyne responded. Kyne took a small sip of the drink he ordered, before wondering how Zander had been. He sounded tired, and did not seem to be in the mood for some conversation. Kyne was not about to see an old friend like this. It was not something that he ever wanted to see. He wanted all of his friends to have the happy ever after with a few ups and downs like him. “You sound very tired. Do you have rugrats of your own? I mean, I can go on about my life until you fall asleep, but I am curious about you. If no more parties, then what have you been up to?” Kyne was being straightforward, like he always was. And there was no avoiding the question.
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[Zander Ellison]

Zander could do nothing but nod as he said he went by his first name, they were no longer kids, they couldn't go by the names they'd once given themselves, Zander just nodded at it, not that surprised to hear the man was married, though his mind could not compute the idea of a family being more respectable than another but knowing that Kyne had been a pureblood he figured the man had married into such circles, for Zander he couldn't say the same, he was unmarried, he had never even gotten close in all the years since leaving school. With Peyton he couldn't lie about having thought about it, since he really had, there had point in their dating where he couldn't help but desire marriage with her, for her, him and his daughter to be a family, but of course Zander didn't have anything good in his life, "Good for you," he compliment, a strained and forced smile appearing on his lips, only for a brief moment, he kept the man's gaze for a moment before staring blankly out ahead, his shoulder sagging slightly as if baring the weight of the world.

It was easy to be jealous of Kyne for Zander who appeared to just have his whole life together when Zander was barely able to keep his head above water, he could barely sleep at night, barely left the house any more. Working from home had been beneficial to him, but it was different from how it had been, the more he'd lost the more he'd just retreated into his home. Being out like this, with a coffee in his hand was a feat for him. The only person he really did anything for was Abby, and maybe at a stretch Sanctuari. Zander could only nod, wondering how many children this man had, "How many you got then?" unhidden weariness in his voice as he attempted to perk himself up, taking a sip of the coffee, Abby brought him great happiness, she was the only one who could make him smile but even recently that had begun to get difficult. Zander ran a hand through his hair when the man commented on the fact he was tired, Zander was tired, he didn't sleep well, and he spent so many nights unable to understand why he was crying but he was tired in so much more than a physical sense, but Zander wasn't about to get into it with this man.

The question being returned to him was an inevitable thing but he had hoped that Kyne would keep talking about his own life which was so together and function unlike Zander's. Zander nodded a little, "I have a daughter," he told him, "Her name's Abby and she's ten, her mother isn't in the picture," he smiled, a small but genuine smile when speaking of Abby, but he didn't go into the complexities of his daughter and the circumstances of her birth, "I work from home, an insurance company, it's not the best job, but they've really helped keep the bills paid while I also raise Abby," There was nothing more that Zander wanted to say on the matter, he sighed heavily, glancing away from Kyne and rubbing his eyes again tiredly, the man let his gaze linger on the floor, his life had really not turned out how he'd wanted, so far from it. He let out a hollow, tired laugh, "Funny how life turns out," for a moment he met Kyne's eyes before returning his gaze blankly out to what was in front of them, not even bothering to try to smile.
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