Closed Last-Ditch Attempt

Corinne Durand

Louis' & Anouk's mum | Free spirit | Irresponsible
 
Messages
39
Age
2/2020 (41)
Corinne couldn't do this any more. she just wasn't made to be a mother. Sure, she loved Anouk, but that was sometimes hard to remember when she woke up in the middle of the night with a stomach bug, or when she destroyed Corinne's favorite lipstick, or when she realized she had no free time left. All day was taken up with taking care of her daughter, she really had no idea how other people did it. Unfortunately, trying to get Richard to take responsibility had been a bust. He gave her money, which was something, but he didn't even want to see his daughter. It wasn't a big surprise, and Corinne could hardly judge him. She had done the same with Louis. Alexander had been her lifeline recently, though she couldn't visit him as often as she'd like with Anouk because Louis still lived at home. Part of Corinne longed to connect with her son, but she also didn't want him to see her like this. In the same situation she had been when she'd had him. He would hate her and rightfully so. But Louis was working according to Alexander, so Corinne had dragged her toddler with her to his house. She knocked on his door, mentally preparing what she was going to say. Alexander had been such a good dad to Louis, surely... surely he could do it again, even if the kid wasn't his?
 
Alex had never really thought of himself as a pushover, but the last couple of years was making him reassess that image majorly. It wasn't that he let people walk all over him really, but he seemed to have absolutely no backbone whatsoever when kids were involved. Having Louis dropped on his doorstep was one thing - Louis was at least his son - but now Corinne seemed to bring Anouk around for every little thing, and the only connection he had with the baby was that he had had a one night stand with her mother twenty years ago.

But it was what it was. Every time he considered shutting his door and turning Corinne away he thought of that baby again - a father who wasn't willing to even do the bare minimum, and a mother who... if Alex was honest, never should have even considered becoming a mother. She was trying, there was no question, but as far as her actual performance, well... Alex bit back a sigh as he opened the door, doing his best to plaster on a smile for Anouk's sake. "Hi Corinne."
 
Corinne sighed in relief when Alexander opened the door and Anouk scampered over to him. See? She already loved him, it would be so easy. Louis could have a sibling too, that would be nice, right? But she bit it back, stepping inside and closing the door. "Hi Alex... thanks so much again, she loves it here." Corinne said, gesturing with a small smile to Anouk.
 
"Bonjour, ma choupinette*!" Alex smiled, crouching down to scoop Anouk into his arms and settle her on his hip. The toddler settled in easily, just as Louis and Giulia had done so long ago. Even as a lost twentysomething who had never planned for kids, he had always loved this, an excited toddler on his hip babbling about her day. He nodded with interest at the no doubt fascinating story Anouk was telling him, despite only being able to make out one in three words at best. "I see! How exciting!" He smiled, rubbing Anouk's back as he addressed her mother. "She's in a good mood today."

*Ma choupinette - term of endearment, literally "my little cabbage"
 
Corinne smiled as Alexander picked up Anouk and listened to her babbling patiently. He really was a good guy, and a good dad. She shook her head as he addressed her. "Only since we got here, she's been a nightmare all day. She decided this morning she just does not want to wear shoes but when I left the house with her without them she decided she hated that too." Corinne shook her head with a sigh. "I never know what to do with her."
 
Alex bounced Anouk lightly as he listened to Corinne, nodding with a small laugh. "Well, I'd imagine everyone's felt that way about something or other at some point." He conceded, rubbing Anouk's back. "Sometimes with things like that you can get away with making a game out of it. Race to see who can put on their shoes the fastest, or something like that." Races had always been an easy way to motivate Louis, though Giulia had taken more subtle coaxing most of the time.
 
Corinne sighed as she took a seat. "See, I never would have thought of that." She said, watching Alex with Anouk. She shook her head. "Alex... I can't do it anymore." She said quietly, moving her gaze away from him and looking down at the floor.
 
Alex kept one hand on Anouk's back as he opened his mouth to respond to Corinne, but her second sentence stunned him to silence. "Can't-?" He croaked, her meaning gradually seeping in. As much as she had been struggling, Alex had hoped that Corinne was- but no. This was exactly the same as Louis - twenty years and she hadn't changed a bit. She'd barely stuck it out two years, and that was only with his constant coaxing and support. "Are... what do you mean by that?" He asked, fighting down the devastation. The toddler settled heavy on his hip anchored his racing panicked thoughts. If it came to it - if Corinne abandoned her child again, there was no chance he could do the same.
 
Corinne felt her eyes fill with tears and she shook her head, not looking up at Alexander, not wanting to see the judgement in his eyes even though she knew she deserved nothing less. "It's what I said- I can't do it. I tried this time, I did. But I can't. I'm not made for it, I'm miserable, she's miserable half the time. I'm unfit to be a parent." She said shakily. She bit back what she wanted to ask him, not quite daring to yet. If he said no, which he had every right to, what was she going to do?
 
Alex only managed to hold back a full blown panic attack for the sake of the toddler in his arms, holding her carefully as Corinne's words bled into him, staining the world around him as he knew it. "She... it's... it's hard." He croaked, fighting to find any words at all. "It's always hard, that's... how it is. But she - look at her. She's happy, she's healthy, you're... you're doing fine..."
 
Corinne shook her head at Alexander's words, still not daring to look at him. "It's impossible." She said softly. "I mean it Alex, I can't. I tried. I can't do it. She's- she's not happy, she cries all the time and I never know how to help her, I can't keep her on a consistent sleep schedule, I'm constantly losing her stuff- I don't know how to do this." Corinne whispered. "I need to leave. Alex... you... you're such a good dad... can't she stay here?"
 
Alex had known the question was coming. He had known it was coming since Corinne had shown up on his doorstep pregnant for the second time, the only difference being time and the fact that Anouk wasn't his. Despite everything his instinct was to hold Anouk tighter, as if he could protect her from Corinne's attempts to abandon another child. "Corinne..." He said, voice pained. "I- you know what that would do to her. What it did to Louis! She needs her mother, just like he needed his. This isn't the answer to all your problems! Parenting is hard, but you need to be there for her."
 
Louis was having a pretty good day. His shift at Quality Quidditch Supplies had ended a little earlier than planned, so he headed home with some dinner for him and his dad. He had been saving up his money slowly but surely, and had started to think he might look for a place of his own. The only thing stopping him was that he knew his dad didn't mind his company, in fact, he got the feeling he was happy Louis was still living with him. Louis didn't mind it either, it was easier than handling everything himself. He opened the door. "Dad, I got takeout-" He stopped in the doorway when he realized his dad wasn't alone. "Oh- sorry." He frowned, taking in the scene. There was his dad holding a toddler and a woman on the couch, was she crying? "What's going on?"
 
Corinne flinched at Alexander's answer. She shook her head. "It wouldn't do any harm- he's fine too. It'd be worse if she were with me." She said shakily. She winced again as the door opened, and she watched as her son stepped in. Corinne froze, staring at him. He looked- he looked like her. She had seen him in pictures, but the sight of him in person... it made her heart stop for a moment as she took him in for the first time since leaving him here as a baby.
 
The liquid dread in Alex's veins sharpened to ice as the door opened, his eyes snapping to Louis in horror. This was the worst, worst possible scenario - Louis had painful enough feelings about his mother abandoning him, and walking on on her trying to do the same for a second time... His mind raced for something - anything to say that wasn't completely inane, and he came up completely blank. "I-um..." He croaked, voice hoarse as though he had been crying for hours. "We-we've got some visitors."
 
Louis had always known he looked like his dad, which was fine by him. He didn't need to stare at himself in the mirror wondering what features he got from his mom, it had always been easier to pretend he got everything from his dad. But as he stared at the woman and as sh elooked up at him, Loui srealized he looked like both of his parents. He knew immediately who she was, like a puzzle piece clicking into place in his brain. He stared in disbelief, then tore his eyes away from her. Looking at her ws making him sick. "Is that- my mother?" He asked his dad instead in a low hiss, though he knew she could hear. He didn't care, he just didn't want to speak to her. Maybe she would disappear again if he looked away long enough. "Dad. What's going on?" He asked, gaze moving from his dad to the little girl he was holding.
 
Corinne was in a waking nightmare. Louis wasn't supposed to be here. She trembled as he looked at her, then looked away. Somehow, she knew he recognized her, and it hurt. She got up. "This was a mistake. I'll go- we'll go." She said, gesturing for Alex to hand Anouk back to her.
 
The cat was out of the bag, and something inside Alex calcified. "No." He said firmly, meeting Corinne's eye. "Corinne, you need- this is Louis, you need to meet him." He said, pleading tone from earlier having entirely solidified. Something about seeing his son next to his mother for the first time made all the time he had spent begging Corinne to meet Louis feel weak. He couldn't keep coddling this flighty woman and sacrificing his son's feelings in the process. They were both here now, and he was making this happen. "Louis, this is your mother, Corinne. And your half-sister, Anouk."
 
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Louis listened to his dad but he could barely make out what he was saying, it felt like he was talking underwater, or far away. He shook his head. "I know- I don't- I don't want to know." He said weakly, taking a step back. "Why is she here? Why do you know her? You said she left me- you said you didn't know where she was!" He started to tremble. "And what do you mean, half sister? What is going ON?" He directed the last bit to the woman, Corinne, his mother. What had she done now?
 
Corinne almost apparated away on the spot when Alexander started introducing her. She didn't want this, she couldn't face Louis. It was easier to think of him as a boy in a photograph, not this... this young man in front of her, barely containing his rage. "Alex, give me Anouk." She said, not quite looking at Louis. She didn't want to be here, and everything about her body language made it clear.
 
There had never been any chance of this meeting being anything other than a disaster, but Alex had always hoped it would be a controlled disaster. He could arrange things, find a neutral meeting place, make sure they were both prepared. But they were here now, and it was too late. "She did leave." He said, ignoring Corinne entirely. "She made contact with me a couple of years ago, to see how you were. I've been trying to convince her to meet you." He also ignored the question about Anouk - that was another kettle of fish for Louis to be angry about later.
 
Louis couldn't believe what he was hearing. He wanted to put his hands over his ears and curl up in a corner somewhere, or run away. But it seemed like his mom was already busy trying to do that. Louis still couldn't bring himself to look at her. "Dad- years? Years!? And you never told me?" It hurt almost as much as hearing his dad had been trying for years to convince his mother to meet him, and she had refused. Louis shook his head. "Let- let her go, I don't want to meet her." He said, taking a step back. He felt furious at his dad, but terrified of this woman. He wanted her out of here, before she could hurt him even more.
 
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Corinne felt pure panic, the more Louis spoke and existed the harder it was to ignore him. She tried to grab her daughter out of Alex' arms, even though she had wanted so badly to leave her here. "Alex- give me Anouk!" She nearly yelled. "I can't- come on!"
 
It was almost a relief when Alex's desperation to control this situation was interrupted, albeit the source was the last thing he had wanted. A shrill despairing wail escaped from Anouk like a disaster warning siren, tiny hands fisted tightly around his shirt as she wept out all her distress. He rubbed her back softly, glaring between Louis and Corinne. "Sit down and calm down." He instructed firmly, authoritative voice entirely unlike the way he usually spoke. He was reminding himself of Ella for possibly the first time ever, and felt almost as though he ought to send his sister a thank you card. "This isn't helping anyone."
 
Louis wasn't used to his dad firmly speaking to him, which gave him pause. He winced too at the crying toddler, still trying to wrap his mind around her role in all this. He stepped closer to the couch, but didn't sit down. He shook his head. "I don't want to." He said, voice shaking. "And she clearly doesn't- she never wanted me." He swallowed. "And I don't need to see how much she doesn't, please dad." Every second Corinne was trying to get away, wasn't even looking at him, hurt him deeper.
 

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