- Messages
- 12
- OOC First Name
- Rowan
- Blood Status
- Mixed Blood
- Relationship Status
- Seeing Somebody
- Sexual Orientation
- Bisexual) (Yvonne
- Age
- 10/2020 (39)
Set after the candidate introductions and Daily Prophet article, but before the first debate.
Kitty had been looking forward to today's broadcast for weeks. She loved her job, she really did, but there was nothing like an election to fuel her work. Ministers' terms lasted forever, and there was so rarely anything political for her to really sink her teeth into, making fun of the day-to-day operations of the Ministry. But right now, this was what it was all about. An election meant new people to focus on, new stories to tell, and plenty of material for new jokes. Kitty's notes were overflowing, and she sorted through them as the show before hers wrapped up, eager to get started on the day's show. Finally she was given the cue to go to air and activated her broadcast equipment with practiced ease.
"Kia ora koutou, welcome to WIZ 98.4, you're listening to Kitty In The Evening, I'm your host Kitty van Zijl and tonight we're going to be taking a look back at the week in politics. And what a week it's been!" Kitty grinned, eyes bright as she kicked the show off. "With the candidates having introduced themselves to us, the lead up to the 2057 election is finally underway. So let's take a look, find out just what the potential future leaders of this country have to say about themselves and their policies, as we begin covering the journey to next year's election!"
Kitty waited for the introductory jingle to play itself out before opening her first segment. "First up, we have Siobhan McGowan. McGowan is Head of the Quidditch League, which technically makes her a senior Ministry employee. How Quidditch translates to running an entire country I'm not certain, but time will tell. Her introduction was inoffensively vague and substance-free, and from it we can summarise that Ms. McGowan does in fact like good things, dislike bad things, and want to be Minister. Not sure it's the amount of information we were seeking, if she wants to beat her opponents. But she'll be chasing the title for a long time, so it remains to be seen whether or not she's a keeper."
Smiling to herself at the terrible puns, Kitty moved on. "Next up we have Victoire Fontaine, from the International Magical Law office. Mrs. Fontaine has had her eye on the title for some time, as a former intern on Minister Holland's campaign. Fontaine had a lot to say about social and financial equality, no doubt influenced by the current Minister. You have to wonder though, while she's been busy peeking at Minister Holland's homework, whether she stopped to consider where the money for these policies is going to come from. Perhaps she's finally cracked the secret to conjuring Galleons out of thin air. Her policies are particularly geared towards children, which makes me wonder who she thinks is able to vote for her. Pandering to twelve year olds won't get you very far when they can't vote..."
Kitty glanced down at her notes again before continuing, unable to help a small chuckle. "Our next speaker was Rupert Cresswell, a curse-breaker who seems to have just decided that being Minister would be fun and wandered his way into the studio. Apparently he's going to figure out how the Ministry works on the go, without any experience at all. Cresswell seemed to think that if he talked enough nobody would notice that he wasn't actually saying anything. He claims to want transparency in the Ministry, which makes sense given his experience. He's probably got his nose pressed up against all the department windows taking notes, trying to figure out what goes on in there. He also claims his campaign is entirely open to suggestions from the public, which makes me wonder if he actually stands for anything at all. If he's so short on policy ideas that he's asking for submissions he's perhaps not such a good puzzle-solver as he tries to sell himself."
Kitty couldn't suppress the wicked grin that spread across her face as she continued. "Our next candidate is the youngest in this election by far, Auror James Cade. Cade's platform seems largely to be based on the thought that changing things is totally unchill, and the Ministry should perhaps just be chill and not bother doing politics so much. I want to touch on the only policy he actually mentioned though, because it was mind blowing. Cade seems to be hinging his entire campaign on the fact that he wants to bring back the Triwizard Tournament. Yeah. That one. You know, the tournament that's killed dozens of children. I have to say, it takes guts to run on a platform that children should die for our entertainment. Mind you, Cade is only 28 with five kids already, so perhaps he's sick of children..."
Carrying on, Kitty glanced down at her notes again as she spoke. "The next speaker was Briar Rowan-Cullen, head of the Department of Magical Creatures. Mrs. Rowan-Cullen didn't say much in the way of actual policy either, focusing instead on her campaign's emphasis on diversity. It didn't seem like she had much in the way of diversity in her ideas however, as she failed to tell us anything other than that she thinks community is pretty great. Of note however is the fact that Mrs. Rowan-Cullen is open about the fact that she's a werewolf, which I believe is a first for politics in Aotearoa. Possibly globally. This puts an enormous amount of weight on her shoulders, and hopefully she'll give us something in the way of actual policy soon. Werewolves face plenty of stigma already, no need to add 'bad politicians' to the list."
Kitty grinned as she carried on, relishing having such a rich vein to talk about this week. "The final candidate in our lineup is difficult to talk about, as she skipped the radio introductions entirely. Whatever was so important as to keep her away from the introductory event, it's made Mrs. Vernier's policies and views a complete mystery. Clarissa Vernier works in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, has five children, and apparently wants to be Minister. Beyond that, I couldn't tell you a single thing about the woman. There's something almost fun about that - do you want to pick one of the candidates you know about, or what's in the mystery box?!" She said with cheerful exaggeration. "Of course, for all we know the mystery box is entirely empty. Time will have to tell what Mrs. Vernier's interests are in running the country."
Clearing her throat, Kitty sat back, almost disappointed to be done. "And those are our candidates! For better or worse, a year from now one of these six will be running the entire country. I'm looking forward to covering all the action as the election season gets underway. We'll be returning to these six in the days to come, but for now we're gonna take a break, and when I'm back we'll be discussing the Tornadoes vs. Kestrels match last weekend." With the segment done, Kitty flipped the broadcast over to an ad break and shuffled ahead in her notes as a cheerful jingle for Eeylops played.
Kitty had been looking forward to today's broadcast for weeks. She loved her job, she really did, but there was nothing like an election to fuel her work. Ministers' terms lasted forever, and there was so rarely anything political for her to really sink her teeth into, making fun of the day-to-day operations of the Ministry. But right now, this was what it was all about. An election meant new people to focus on, new stories to tell, and plenty of material for new jokes. Kitty's notes were overflowing, and she sorted through them as the show before hers wrapped up, eager to get started on the day's show. Finally she was given the cue to go to air and activated her broadcast equipment with practiced ease.
"Kia ora koutou, welcome to WIZ 98.4, you're listening to Kitty In The Evening, I'm your host Kitty van Zijl and tonight we're going to be taking a look back at the week in politics. And what a week it's been!" Kitty grinned, eyes bright as she kicked the show off. "With the candidates having introduced themselves to us, the lead up to the 2057 election is finally underway. So let's take a look, find out just what the potential future leaders of this country have to say about themselves and their policies, as we begin covering the journey to next year's election!"
Kitty waited for the introductory jingle to play itself out before opening her first segment. "First up, we have Siobhan McGowan. McGowan is Head of the Quidditch League, which technically makes her a senior Ministry employee. How Quidditch translates to running an entire country I'm not certain, but time will tell. Her introduction was inoffensively vague and substance-free, and from it we can summarise that Ms. McGowan does in fact like good things, dislike bad things, and want to be Minister. Not sure it's the amount of information we were seeking, if she wants to beat her opponents. But she'll be chasing the title for a long time, so it remains to be seen whether or not she's a keeper."
Smiling to herself at the terrible puns, Kitty moved on. "Next up we have Victoire Fontaine, from the International Magical Law office. Mrs. Fontaine has had her eye on the title for some time, as a former intern on Minister Holland's campaign. Fontaine had a lot to say about social and financial equality, no doubt influenced by the current Minister. You have to wonder though, while she's been busy peeking at Minister Holland's homework, whether she stopped to consider where the money for these policies is going to come from. Perhaps she's finally cracked the secret to conjuring Galleons out of thin air. Her policies are particularly geared towards children, which makes me wonder who she thinks is able to vote for her. Pandering to twelve year olds won't get you very far when they can't vote..."
Kitty glanced down at her notes again before continuing, unable to help a small chuckle. "Our next speaker was Rupert Cresswell, a curse-breaker who seems to have just decided that being Minister would be fun and wandered his way into the studio. Apparently he's going to figure out how the Ministry works on the go, without any experience at all. Cresswell seemed to think that if he talked enough nobody would notice that he wasn't actually saying anything. He claims to want transparency in the Ministry, which makes sense given his experience. He's probably got his nose pressed up against all the department windows taking notes, trying to figure out what goes on in there. He also claims his campaign is entirely open to suggestions from the public, which makes me wonder if he actually stands for anything at all. If he's so short on policy ideas that he's asking for submissions he's perhaps not such a good puzzle-solver as he tries to sell himself."
Kitty couldn't suppress the wicked grin that spread across her face as she continued. "Our next candidate is the youngest in this election by far, Auror James Cade. Cade's platform seems largely to be based on the thought that changing things is totally unchill, and the Ministry should perhaps just be chill and not bother doing politics so much. I want to touch on the only policy he actually mentioned though, because it was mind blowing. Cade seems to be hinging his entire campaign on the fact that he wants to bring back the Triwizard Tournament. Yeah. That one. You know, the tournament that's killed dozens of children. I have to say, it takes guts to run on a platform that children should die for our entertainment. Mind you, Cade is only 28 with five kids already, so perhaps he's sick of children..."
Carrying on, Kitty glanced down at her notes again as she spoke. "The next speaker was Briar Rowan-Cullen, head of the Department of Magical Creatures. Mrs. Rowan-Cullen didn't say much in the way of actual policy either, focusing instead on her campaign's emphasis on diversity. It didn't seem like she had much in the way of diversity in her ideas however, as she failed to tell us anything other than that she thinks community is pretty great. Of note however is the fact that Mrs. Rowan-Cullen is open about the fact that she's a werewolf, which I believe is a first for politics in Aotearoa. Possibly globally. This puts an enormous amount of weight on her shoulders, and hopefully she'll give us something in the way of actual policy soon. Werewolves face plenty of stigma already, no need to add 'bad politicians' to the list."
Kitty grinned as she carried on, relishing having such a rich vein to talk about this week. "The final candidate in our lineup is difficult to talk about, as she skipped the radio introductions entirely. Whatever was so important as to keep her away from the introductory event, it's made Mrs. Vernier's policies and views a complete mystery. Clarissa Vernier works in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, has five children, and apparently wants to be Minister. Beyond that, I couldn't tell you a single thing about the woman. There's something almost fun about that - do you want to pick one of the candidates you know about, or what's in the mystery box?!" She said with cheerful exaggeration. "Of course, for all we know the mystery box is entirely empty. Time will have to tell what Mrs. Vernier's interests are in running the country."
Clearing her throat, Kitty sat back, almost disappointed to be done. "And those are our candidates! For better or worse, a year from now one of these six will be running the entire country. I'm looking forward to covering all the action as the election season gets underway. We'll be returning to these six in the days to come, but for now we're gonna take a break, and when I'm back we'll be discussing the Tornadoes vs. Kestrels match last weekend." With the segment done, Kitty flipped the broadcast over to an ad break and shuffled ahead in her notes as a cheerful jingle for Eeylops played.
Out of Character: - Kitty hosts a comedy radio station, specialising in current events/political satire. All comments are purely IC, and intended entirely as comedy.
Feel free to RP your characters reacting to/referencing Kitty's show in other threads!