Kaela is thinking...

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Kaela McIlvoy

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Kaela walked down to the Lakefront with her Ravenclaw tote bag. Despite the beautiful weather outside she looked fairly melancholy. She found a tree not to far off from the lake and sat down, pulling a book out of her bag. Opening the book, Kaela began to read, wondering how long she would be sitting alone. She had asked Bruin to join her, but was not sure if he would come or not. Her initial thought was that he surely would not come, but she very much hoped he would.
 
Bruin had just finished preparing some study notes for the upcoming exams. Despite his heavy course load he was feeling extremely confident that the year would end well, wondering whether all of the teas and sage sticks that they had been experimenting with in Herbology were having perhaps too positive an effect on him. Bruin had been invited to talk with Kaela down at the lake and recognizing a beautiful day when he saw one decided to join her.

Bruin saw Kaela sitting against a tree and flopped down in the warm sunshine a few feet from her. "Hey Kaela. What's going on?", he asked cheerfully.
 
Kaela looked up from her book to Bruin, her look quite blank. She noted the cheerful expression he wore and became even more saddened. I wish I could be that happy, she thought to herself and frowned.

"Hey Bruin. Just relaxing and enjoying the weather, how about you?"
 
"Pretty much the same. I think Professor Rambolt's tea has me a little too relaxed though. For some reason I'm just feeling way too confident this close to exams....", he said with a smile. "So, what are you reading?"

Bruin noticed that Kaela seemed a little deep in thought and wondered if it might have something to do with what she was absorbed in.
 
Kaela got a bit worried when Bruin mentioned exams. She had not been doing well at all, and in fact had some bad news. She was a bit relieved when he asked her what she was reading, simply because then she didn't have to think or talk about her bad times.

"Oh, uhm, just a Star Wars book," she said, seeming a bit out of it. She didn't really know what to say to Bruin. Kaela wanted to talk to him, and tell him everything she had been feeling. For some reason she felt like he was someone who would listen, but she was afraid of opening up because she didn't want to scare or annoy him.
 
"There are Star Wars books?", Bruin asked, sounding incredulous. "I didn't know that, I figured they were just movies." Bruin hoped he didn't sound like a total idiot, but reading wasn't a huge part of his life, unless of course it was a textbook and then he didn't mind devouring the information contained within. "Anything else new and exciting in the world of Kaela?"
 
"Yeah, there are a ton of books. Way more popular than the movies I think." Kaela closed her book and put it back into her bag. She considered how to respond to Bruin asking if anything was new and exciting. "There is some new stuff, I guess you could say. I wouldn't call it exciting though..." Kaela's expression dropped a bit, and she seemed a bit more outwardly sad as she looked down at her lap.
 
Bruin noticed that Kaela seemed even a little more reserved than normal, perhaps even a little sad and he wondered what was going on, although didn't want to pry. He had only recently begun getting to know Kaela and wasn't sure if she trusted him, having never done anything to let her think otherwise, but still a little uncertain as to whether she considered him a close friend or not.

"Anything that you'd like to share?", he inquired quietly before adding, "No pressure though..."
 
Kaela looked up at Bruin and frowned. I can't believe I'm going to say this... she thought and stared at him for a moment. "Things aren't going too well for me..." she managed to say, tears beginning to well up in her eyes. She looked back down at her lap, ashamed of herself for being so emotional.
 
Bruin was surprised by Kaela's reaction and was unsure as to what to say or do. He had a feeling that Kaela wasn't doing well, but had no inkling what her worries were about. Finally, he did the only thing that came to mind and tried to be a friend. "I'm sorry to hear that. Is there anything that I can do to help?", he offered softly.
 
Kaela looked up at Bruin, tears trickling slowly down her cheeks. She quickly looked away and wiped them off with her sleeve, hoping he hadn't noticed. "Uhm...well..." she began, seeming a bit nervous. "I could really use a hug," she said tentatively, hoping Bruin would not find this weird or anything.
 
Bruin had spent the Winter Holidays offering numerous hugs to his mother, attempting to help her cope with the loss of Bruin's grandparents, but offering a hug to a fellow student was unchartered territory. He got the sense that something must really be wrong if Kaela would request one so openly and decided that he could certainly put aside his own reservations to offer a shoulder to cry on as easily as he would lend a non-judgmental ear. "Umm, sure...no problem...", he replied awkwardly as he moved beside Kaela and put his arm around her shoulder, allowing her to lean against him if she chose to.

"Is something wrong at home?", Bruin asked, wondering what could have caused Kaela to feel as though she needed a hug. A thought occurred to him that this might have something to do with Ford, but Bruin didn't exactly know how close they had been or what else might be going on in Kaela's personal life.
 
Kaela smiled weakly, quite relieved when Bruin put his arm around her. She knew he probably didn't want to, why would anyone want to hug me? But she was glad he had done is nonetheless.

When she leaned on him Kaela immediately began to feel better. Then Bruin asked her if someone was wrong at home. Tears quickly filled her eyes and spilled out onto her cheeks. "My ma..." she blurted out softly, trying not to sob. "She's sick." As soon as the words came out Kaela did start sobbing, looking down at the ground in shame and sadness.
 
Kaela's words caught Bruin by surprise, he had no idea that Kaela's mom was sick and he wondered if it was a new development or something that had been going on for some time. "Ohhh...", he said quietly. "I'm so sorry....is....is it something new...I mean, that's just happened?". Bruin was hoping that it wasn't anything serious, but didn't really know what else to say.
 
"No," Kaela blurted out between her sobs, hoping no one else would notice her crying on the ground in Bruin's arms. "No one t-told me though." She hated thinking about it. Her ma had been sick for a bit and that was part of why she hadn't wanted Kaela to come here for school. But seeing how excited Kaela was about coming no one told Kaela and they let her go to Hogwarts New Zealand without a worry. Now she knew the truth and was absolutely devastated. Her ma was sick and had been and she hadn't known and she didn't know how much time they would have left with each other.
 
Bruin felt like he was failing miserably at helping Kaela. It seemed as though the longer that he sat there, the worse she appeared to feel. "So, um, is there anything I can do to help?", Bruin wondered aloud, feeling incredibly stupid for not being of greater comfort to Kaela, but deep down recognizing that this was simply not his area of expertise.
 
"I'm s-so sorry," Kaela manage to say softly, trying to lessen her crying. She sniffled a bit, no longer sobbing but tears still dripping down her cheeks.

"Just being here is enough. Thanks for that." Kaela sniffled and smiled weakly up at Bruin. It was nice to be able to talk to him. He didn't judge her and wasn't trying to tell her what to do, he was just listening.
 
Bruin was glad to see Kaela perk up a little and was relieved that at least she felt he was helping. "No problem...", Bruin replied sincerely. "I'm sure that you'd do the same for me if I ever needed someone to talk to.", Bruin added and recognized that Kaela probably would, unlike some of the other third years whom he had previously considered friends.

"What about you? Do you know what you're going to do?", Bruin asked, assuming that Kaela might be thinking about heading home early to be with her mom, but not wanting to be presume anything.
 
Kaela nodded. "Of course, you can always talk to me when you need someone." The tears were beginning to subside, as Bruin's presence was helping.

"But I am going to go home. I'm leaving right away in fact." This caused Kaela to frown, sad that she would be leaving people like Bruin behind.
 
Bruin offered up a weak smile, knowing that Kaela was making the right choice even though he hated to see her leave. "Ohh...well, do you need any help getting ready or anything? I mean, uh, I can help carry some stuff for you or...", Bruin realized that he was probably pretty useless at this point ,and ending his comment there.

"Will you write and let us know what's going on and when you might be coming back at least?", Bruin asked, hoping that he wouldn't lose contact with Kaela just as they were getting to know each other.
 
Kaela smiled weakly. It made her feel so good to know that he cared enough to offer her help and make sure she would write. Here I thought no one cared. "Of course I'll write. And you can write me too, to let me know what's going on here."
 
Bruin smiled. "Sounds good. I'll do my best to keep you up to date on all of the important stuff anyways. My owl, Legend, doesn't get much work so I'm sure he'll appreciate the odd excursion anyways."

Bruin turned and looked at Kaela. "So, umm, have you told anybody else yet? I mean about your having to leave..." Bruin assumed that Kaela had already probably told Courtney and Estrella, but didn't know who else she was close with. He recognized that his own small circle of friends had shrunk dramatically in the last year and wondered if the Sorority offered more social opportunities then the Brotherhood had managed.
 
Kaela's smile strengthened when Bruin said he would write to her. It was nice to have that reassurance. When he asked her if she had told anyone else however, her smile faded.

"Uhm, no..." She scrunched her lips and looked at the floor. "I don't really know how to tell Courtney and Estrella." Kaela had thought about it, and was quite afraid of their reactions.
 
Bruin noticed Kaela's rapid change of expression and that she appeared to be a little tentative about telling her fellow Ravenclaws. "I think you should just tell them exactly what you told me. From what I know about Estrella and Courtney, I'm sure they'll understand. Heck, they'll probably go out of their way to come and visit you the first chance they get." Bruin hoped he didn't sound like he was telling Kaela what to do, but didn't really understand why Kaela would be hesitant to share with her friends.

"Do you want me to be there when you tell them? I mean, I'll tell them for you if you want, but I think they'd like to hear this straight from you, don't you think?", Bruin smiled weakly, trying to let Kaela know he'd support her in whatever decision she made.
 
"Yeah, they'll want to hear it from me..." Kaela said as she considered her friends. She looked up at Bruin. "I would definitely like you to be there, if you could. I think it will help me a lot." She smiled weakly up at Bruin, glad she was talking to him. Kaela began to wonder why they had never been close before.
 
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