Closed In On the Joke

[Kasim Safir]

When Kas committed to a joke, he liked to commit to the joke. It was a point of petty pride sometimes to keep doing it long past when his friends (usually Connor) were done finding it funny and were starting to get annoyed. But this whole thing with Connor and Eric. Kas wasn't so sure he wanted to keep it up. He'd already felt weird lying to Eric. Even more weird about some of the things he'd said that hadn't been lies either. It was all starting to get tangled up in his head and Kas wasn't sure who was supposed to be laughing at their ruse anymore. It certainly wasn't him.

"Hey," he said, gently grabbing Connor's arm to pull him aside, figuring he wasn't being the best dance partner right now the way he'd crawled up inside his head since they'd stepped foot inside the dance. "Is Eric even paying attention anymore? Like, do you think we should keep doing this?" He asked Connor dubiously, retracting his hand though his eyes lingered on their matching red sleeves for a moment before glancing back at Connor, hoping his face was convincingly casual.

 

[Connor Holland]

The longer this prank with Kas went on, the easier it was getting. The more comfortable. Connor didn't like to think that he was forgetting it was all just a prank, but it just... felt right, holding hands with Kas between classes, kissing him at the breakfast table when Eric looked over. He had forgotten a couple of times, gone to kiss Kas when it was just them in the Hufflepuff common room, and that was a thought he really didn't want to confront. The truth was that real or fake, this thing with Kas was easier than any of his previous relationships. It felt natural, it felt right, and that thought was very scary.

The dance, at least, was an excuse to forget all the worries tickling at the edges of his brain, as far as Connor was concerned. They could dance together and make out on the dance floor to annoy Eric, and there would be nothing but the artifice. Nothing at all. And if there was something else, it would be easy to pretend it was all part of the prank. At least, Connor thought so until Kas pulled him aside. He opened and closed his mouth a couple of times, trying to get his thoughts out, but nothing was coming. He didn't want this to end, Connor was sure of that, but acknowledging that meant acknowledging the reasons, and Connor didn't even know where to begin with that. He doubted Kas would be especially impressed to hear them. "It... do... do you want to stop?" Connor asked hesitantly, not able to find anything other than that to respond with. If this whole thing was making Kas uncomfortable, it definitely had to end, but... that thought only hit deeper at the part of all of this Connor didn't want to think about.

 

[Kasim Safir]

Connor's fish impression was pretty impressive but not exactly the reaction Kas had been expecting to his question. He raised an eyebrow at Connor's response once he finally got it out, glancing around the hall again and shrugging. He wasn't sure if Connor had forgotten why they were doing this, but Kas hadn't been able to clear it from his mind. It was all pretend, as a joke, even when they didn't have an audience, and as much as Kas had been in on it in the beginning, he was starting to feel used in a way he didn't like. If he was getting serious feelings out of this whole thing, the last thing he needed was confirmation it'd all been pretend. "I mean. Yeah? We've got to end it eventually. I guess we could say we broke up over the holidays once Eric graduates but like... If Eric doesn't care anymore is there even a point?" Kas could feel his stomach twist uncomfortably even as he spoke, though his voice as as even and flat as ever. It was good to remind himself of the truth of what they were doing anyway, he needed the reality check before he got in too deep.

 

[Connor Holland]

Connor knew his face was betraying his conflicted emotions, but he couldn't quite manage to rein it in. He hadn't realised just how little he wanted this to end until Kas brought it up, but now... the thought of going back to life with nobody even pretending to like him... it hurt, and he didn't know what to do with that hurt. But if Kas didn't want to keep doing this. "I... I mean, we don't even need to fake a breakup, really." He said, doing his best to pretend his voice wasn't uncomfortably froggy and hoping Kas would do him the same kindness. "We could just... tell Eric, like, ha ha the whole thing was a joke, got you, you know..." He shrugged, looking down at his hands as they twisted uncomfortably. "No... I mean, no need to.... drag it out."