</SIZE><SIZE size="50">It was early when Stefan stood in front of his mirror. He was completely ready for his first, slightly more official date thing with Kate, and the fact he was nervous was clear. A part of him didn't want to go. A part of him, wanted to just hide underneath his bed and forget the monsters that lurked outside. This last meeting with Kate before the holidays was potentially the last he'd see her ever. There was no denying in his mind that these holidays would the end of him. He didn't know if he looked the right part. Ever since he'd asked her to be his date to the ball, his heart raced at the slightest thought of the day. It literally scared him, and Stefan didn't like feeling scared, not about something he'd really always wanted. The first time, he'd acted brave and done something for him. Where he hadn't been rejected or promptly punched in the face. He had taken the time to hand wash his t-shirt, jeans and jumper for the occasion, he knew full well that he could've done it by magic, but he'd not be able to fall asleep that night, so the logical step for him had been washing his clothes. He wanted this night to be perfect for Kate, after perfection was something she deserved and it wasn't something that the Slytherin teen thought he could really provide for her. Especially since he didn't think he'd make it through the holidays. Stefan couldn't mention it. He didn't want to put her in any form of position where she would worry about him. Of course, a part of him realized that she would always slightly worry about him, if she had any incline as to what happened at home to him, she had reason to. Stefan just knew that at the first glance of the night where he looked at her, in whatever beautiful outfit she'd put on, when she smiled at him, and made him feel completely happy, he just knew that he could never talk of his fears of the holiday. If he didn't make it, he didn't want to think about what would happen to her. Would any one tell her, would any one know. Stefan overall felt pretty nervous. And all he wanted was for this first night with just him and Kate, no friends or family to be perfect. He wanted it to be a night that would help him in the darkest times. A simple reminder that he had something waiting for him when he got back to school. Something well out of his league. He knew that he wasn't going to be the right guy for her, she deserved someone that had less of a past and a lot more stability. Someone who could in the end provide for her, something he knew he'd never be able to. His entire life was a mess, and he didn't think he really deserved such a happy end. He was an Archer after all, a colourblind Slytherin, his luck wasn't exactly the best. And nothing would really make it better at this point. However, pushing all of these thoughts to the very back of his mind he smiled to himself and headed to the Great Hall. A small bouquet of flowers in one hand, and in his pocket a small gift he'd managed to find.
Walking through the dungeons, Stefan's mind was working apart from his body. He could feel the sweat on his hands, he could feel eyes on him for his dressed down style. He was just happy it wasn't because of the bruises he tended to have. it was the end of the term and it was the only time that Stefan really blended in at Hogwarts. He didn't have a black eye, or a bandage. He had scars, but they weren't visible since they were under his clothing. He sighed to himself and told himself to get a grip. He kept his head down until he'd arrived at the great Hall. He felt like turning and running. His heart was hammering so hard in his chest he thought his ribs were going to break. He could barely keep it together. he had no idea that he could ever feel such a way because of a girl. Sure it was literally the girl of his dreams, but it wasn't like they weren't already friends and she knew him so well, like he knew her. Of course he knew her slightly better than she knew him, but he had his reasons. It had always surprised him that Kate had just been so okay with not pestering him with questions that he would never answer. Well, maybe never was the wrong word now. Something he just wouldn't mention until he was ready. He glanced around the hall, and through the black and white stream of people he noticed her standing at the drinks table. His heart seemed to beat twice as fast, he hadn't thought it would even be possible. She had literally taken his breath away. Stefan walked forward and kept his eyes to the ground until he was standing in front of her. "Hey" Stefan said quietly, finally looking up and meeting her eyes. He had a smile on his face, and his eyes almost said, I'll love you forever. "I brought you flowers,they're not much." Stefan was stumbling over his words. It wasn't smooth at all. Kate had always been beautiful to him, but this was completely different. She was the most perfect girl he'd ever seen. "You look breath-taking. I am literally the luckiest guy here. And my luck tends to suck" Stefan said, not taking his eyes off her. He had been about to extend his hand to her so they could dance when he remember he had a second gift. He reached into his trouser pocket and from within pulled out a very simple gold chain, that had a tiny heart pendent. It looked pretty old. "It belonged to my mum, my dad gave it to me" Stefan said, extending the truth slightly, since his dad had given it to him, well he'd thrown it, while telling Stefan about how he'd broken his mother's heart and it was his fault she was he was and this was meant to be a constant reminder of how it was his fault she was dead. He however didn't see it that way. "I thought I lost it, but I was tidying and I found it at the bottom of my bag. I want you to have it, so you'll never forget me." Stefan looked down at his feet before looking back up at her. He could feel his cheeks warming, he had wanted her to have it as soon as he'd found it. It was for him to pass on, not a reminder of what was his fault. "It's not much, it's not worth much. But I would you like to have it"