Closed Bent and Broken

[Blake van Houten]

Of all the ways today could have ended, there was a sort of poetic tragedy to this. Blake had spent so much of his life thinking of himself as the conqueror, unmatched by anyone in his path. Then he had seen himself for the villain he was. And now, now that he was trying so hard to be the good guy, to be the hero... now fate saw fit to punish him. He knew he had always played a vicious game, but that was what Quidditch was, there was no kind way to play a game where one position's only goal was to draw as much blood from their opponents as possible. But after years of encouraging his own Beaters to thrash their competition into the mud... maybe this was what he deserved. For all the years he had spent thrashing other people into mud.

Lying in the quiet of the hospital wing, trying hard not to think about how much it had hurt to reset his dislocated shoulder or the sting of his fractured ribs weaving back into solid bone, Blake was reminded of his last couple of visits to the hospital wing. Lars had visited both times, and both times it had made his heart soar, whether he would ever admit it or not. Lars had brought him flowers, even when Blake had been nobody but his bully. The visits had been the only thing to drag his mind out of the destructive thoughts he was now spiralling towards. 'Weak...' His father's voice echoed in his mind, dragging old fears back to the surface. It was too easy to dwell on the thought that his father could be right, that Blake had something wrong with him, a weakness that would stop him ever accomplishing anything of significance. The thoughts were quieter now, much quieter than they had been before, but a part of Blake wondered if he would ever be free of the shadow of his father, of the hate and disdain the man wielded like a mace, demolishing everything good in its path. He had escaped his father physically of course, but the years and years being slowly crushed under the force of his worldview had twisted Blake into a shape he didn't know if he could ever unravel. So he lay in the hospital wing with silent tears slipping down his face, wondering if he deserved this, if it was inevitable, if he had sealed his own fate, and hoped desperately that he wouldn't be alone for long.

 

[Lars van Houten]

Lars could hardly remember how he had made his way from the stands to the third-floor corridor, had he ran here? Probably, he was somewhat out of breath. But now that he was in front of the doors to the hospital wing, Lars hesitated. Did Blake even want him there? Maybe he should have stayed and watched the game, to see how it ended for him. But he couldn't stay away, it didn't matter anyway. What mattered was how Blake was feeling.

So the Ravenclaw entered the hospital wing, spotting Blake immediately. He rushed over to his bed and grabbed his hand, noticing the tears on his face. Without a word, he reached over to wipe them away. "Are you in pain?" He asked Blake quietly, though he could guess the tears weren't out of physical pain.

 

[Blake van Houten]

The hospital doors opening felt like sun bursting through the clouds crowding his mind, and Blake looked over desperately, relief washing over him at the sight of Lars. He was reaching out before Lars even got to him, taking the Ravenclaw's hand gratefully and holding on tight. He hadn't really realised how much he was crying until Lars reached for his face. He shook his head quickly at the question, instinctively reaching to wipe his eyes and being stung a moment later by a stab of pain from his freshly healed shoulder. "It's fine." He mumbled, settling his healing arm back into place carefully. "Mostly just... disappointed." He paused. "Embarrassed, I guess. Hope the pro scouts weren't watching." He went silent for a moment, staring at their joined hands. Lars knew him so deeply, knew exactly the significance of the words he was about to say, and Blake knew it was safe, for once, to admit. "...Thinking about my dad." He mumbled, squeezing Lars' hand gently for support. "About what he'd say..."

 

[Lars van Houten]

Lars frowned and gently pushed his hand down. "It's okay." He said softly. "It's okay to be sad." He said quietly, taking a seat on the edge of the bed. Lars smiled and stroked his hair back. "I bet the pro scouts already all have you on their lists, they'll be fighting over you." He said softly, as he continued to stroke his hair. A silence fell between them and Lars quietly squeezed his hand. At Blake's words, he froze for a moment before looking down and meeting his eyes. "I know." He said softly. "But... I hope you can listen to what I say instead. And that is that I'm proud of you, that you did well... that you're amazing and there's more to you than just how much you win." He said, leaning down to kiss his forehead. "You should be kind to yourself." He said softly.

 

[Professor Minnie Calida]

Minnie knew that quidditch was a difficult and dangerous game, she’d been on the receiving end of so many bludgers and taken out of countless games, but watching Blake be taken out of the final game of his school career, she knew the heart ache he likely was feeling. Of all the people she’d become friendly over the last few years Blake would’ve been the last person that she would’ve thought she might be friends with but it was odd how much you could have in common with people and for all their differences they were similar in a lot of ways. She had left the game, Slytherin winning would be a good outcome but she wasn’t so loyal to Hogwarts that she wanted them to win really. She had given it a little longer to watch another player get taken out and then have to focus all the attention on one of the young players. She also figured that Lars would want to spend a moment with his boyfriend before said boyfriend was bombarded by others. Minnie stepped into the hospital wing, her hand moving to the snitch necklace she always wore, given to her by an old slytherin seeker. She spotted the pair and gave a little smile, Blake looked upset and she wondered if perhaps it would be better if she came back later. ”Oh, sorry,” she immediately said, ”I’ll come back later,”​

 

[Blake van Houten]

Blake laughed softly when Lars said the pros were probably fighting over him, relaxing back into the hospital bed. "Least they know I can take a hit now." He joked, though the laughter made his shoulder ache. He squeezed Lars' hand gratefully, relaxing at the reminder that the people who valued him were here. He was safe. "Yeah." He smiled warmly, though being kind to himself was something that still took constant reminders. With Lars here it felt... possible. "Thank you." He looked up at the sound of footsteps, smiling quickly when he spotted Minnie. "Hey!" He almost hated to ask, but couldn't resist. "Is the match over? How'd we do?"

 

[Lars van Houten]

Lars looked up as someone else joined them, smiling automatically at the sight of Minnie. Over the years, he really had started considering her one of his closest friends. He knew she had gotten close to Blake as well, forming some sort of seeker bond Lars didn't quite understand. He shook his head when she said she could come back later, glad that Blake seemed to agree that Minnie didn't have to go. "It's okay." Lars said, smiling. "It's nice of you to come check on him as well." He said softly. "But Blake's tougher than he looks." He said, teasing him slightly while stroking back his hair.

 

[Professor Minnie Calida]

Minnie gave a little smile to them each as they greeted her. She felt reassured quickly that she wasn’t bothering them but she didn’t want to out stay her welcome either. She gave a little shake of her head, ”Not when I left, but I’m sure Slytherin will win, they’d have to take out each of your team members before they could win,” she gave a little smile, knowing that the slytherin team were a true force. ”I have something for you,” she said to Blake, reaching up to the snitch necklace she wore, the one from Leda, and she took it off. She held it in her hand and then looked back at Blake, ”I don’t know if you’re much of a jewellery guy, but the first game I was ravenclaw’s seeker, a game against slytherin, I got taken out by beaters, and my parents were…..unhappy with my abilities so far anyway and I knew they’d be...unreasonable,” Minnie said, ”I was pretty decided to just quitting the team, and Leda came to see me and ended up convincing me to not,”

Minnie gave a little smile and then took a step forward. ”She gave me this necklace and whenever my parents made me feel bad about being on the team, I’d just remember her encouragement. But...eh...I don’t need it any more..I always felt bad that she gave it to me when it should’ve gone to you probably….and you’ll no doubt take your talents to another team...so, I want to give it to you,” Minnie spoke rapidly, her voice wavering when she spoke of her parents but she pushed through until she finished, and she held the necklace out. She wasn’t sure he would like something like that but she really didn’t need any reassurance anymore, her parents weren’t in her life and they couldn’t make her feel any worse than she had felt in the last two years. She’d get something new to wear, maybe a locket or something, but this snitch necklace, she could give that back to slytherin hands. She wasn’t sure what she’d do if he didn’t want it, but he could just pass it on to someone else, she wouldn’t be annoyed about that. ​

 

[Blake van Houten]

Lars' hand in his hair was soothing, and Blake could feel his rattled nerves gradually settling. He leaned into the touch slightly, letting out a small sigh as Minnie approached, finally allowing himself to smile a tiny bit. He knew it would take a long time to get over the disappointment of letting his team down, but at least here he was surrounded by people who loved him. He slumped slightly when Minnie said the match was still going on, but he nodded slightly, glad that at least they were still in with a chance. "Wouldn't put it past 'em." He couldn't help mumbling, a slight edge of pessimism leaking out. He was distracted by Minnie saying she had something for him though, looking up in surprise. His heart wrenched slightly as she went on, explaining the history of the necklace. "Thank you..." He said, only realising he was choked up when he heard his own voice. He cleared his throat quickly, leaning forward a little and starting to try to put the necklace on when his shoulder twinged again. Wincing, he passed it to Lars instead, silently asking for help putting it on. "I'll... I'll treasure it." He paused, trying to think of what he could possibly say in response to such a meaningful gift. "You're... an amazing Seeker." He said firmly, meeting Minnie's eyes. "Your parents don't know what they're missing, not supporting you. They're... they don't deserve you, if they can't appreciate you. It's been an honour, getting to play against you. I hope we get to play again some time, even if it's just... a weekend friendly game or something."