A Bottle full of Forgetfulness

[Andromeda Fiorelli]

The rain was beating down now as the lone Gryffindor ran across the lawn and the gardens. Over a week ago she had taken a vial of Forgetfulness potion from her potions class and she had every intention of taking it. She was messing up more than ever and destroying those about her with mere words. Her anger at herself made her run all the more faster, slipping and sliding as she was across the grass. Twice she fell down, the rain pelting off her but she didn't care. Not anymore. She had a means to lose it all, to forget everything and she was going to grasp that with both hands. Getting up and not even bothering to wipe the mud splattered jeans she wore, Andromeda ran on to the quidditch pitch. Normally her feet would have taken her to the forest for privacy but after her arguement with Brian she wasn't likely to do that now.

She ran around to the store shed and using her wand opened up the lock and stepped inside. It wasn't very warm but at least it was dry and no-one else would be venturing out on a day like this. Sitting in a corner of the shed she removed the vial from her pocket and looked at it.

"I need to forget" she told the bottle, not sure exactly how much she would forget just knowing she had to, "It's all too much."
Taking the cork from the vial she held it up infront of her, tears slowly slid down her young face.
"I've hurt my best friend, I've upset others with my big mouth. I can't do anything right. The nightmares are relentless since I argued with Brian" she hung her head, the vial still clasped tightly in her hand.

"I'm pathetic. A werewolf with a penchant for getting her human self into more trouble than her wolf form. I don't want to remember anything" using her free hand she wiped the tears away, more determined now.
"I want to forget everything that has happened since I started at Hogwarts. I want to remember only the girl I was before that. I want to remember that once upon a time I had a good life, a great life. That I had a father who loved me, an uncle who protected me. I want to forget all the rest".

The thoughts that could not be expressed in words flooded her mind, how could she forgive herself for any of it? This was easier to do, forget it all happened every last horrible detail.

 

[Groundskeeper Willie]

Willie made his way across the rain soaked grounds, carrying a few tools with him that would not be getting anymore use until the rain let up. When he arrived at the tool shed, he was surprised to see that the lock was already open and the door slightly ajar. Willie had learned long ago that it was best to keep his tools and other possessions under lock and key with the number of nosy little rugrats running amock on the grounds. He pushed open the door and peered in, not noticing the girl in the corner until he had already stepped in and started arranging his tools in their usual racks.

Oi, what're you doin' in here?" he barked before recognizing the girl as the fiery little redhead who had helped spread fertilizer a couple years back. The girl had impressed him with her pluck back then and he'd developed a little bit of a soft spot for her, although he'd never admit it. "Oh, it's you..." he added in a decidedly gentler tone, not feeling inclined to offer much more until the girl had a chance to explain herself.

 

[Andromeda Fiorelli]

Andy looked up hastily as the door opened and Willie walked in to put away some tools. She wiped her tears away but knew her eyes were already red and her face blotchy. In her hand still lay the vial but she hoped that in this dim light that he wouldn't notice it or her face.

"Hi Willie" she attempted a smile but it was short coming, the vial was now clutched within both her hands in an attempt to hide it.
"I was just sitting in out of the rain".
It was possibly the lamest excuse yet but maybe, just maybe it would be enough. And then it wasn't, the flood gates opened up and fresh tears fell down. She couldn't lie or pretend to be doing something else to Willie of all people. She had too much respect for him. Slowly her hands opened to reveal the vial.
"I wanted to forget Willie that's all".
It sounded so lonesome and pathetic, so heart wrenching.

 

[Groundskeeper Willie]

Willie listened as the girl, Andy if he recalled correctly, offered up some excuse about just getting out of the rain before breaking down and muttering something about wanting to forget something. Willie had thought he'd come into the shed to get out of the waterworks and here he found himself in the worst type of storm, a torrent of teenage girl tears. He would normally be inclined to just tell the girl to get her arse back up to the school, but it sounded as though the storm was worsening so he plopped himself down on crate and pulled a flask out of his breast pocket and took a swig.

He noticed that Andy was holding something clutched in her hands and wondered if it was some kind of reminder of whatever was bothering her. "What's that you got there? Is that what you need to forget?" He asked with a hint of tenderness hidden beneath the straight-to-the-point wording.

 

[Andromeda Fiorelli]

Andromeda looked at Willie as he sat down and took out his flask. He asked about the vial in her hand and she looked at it herself.
"No I'm not trying to forget this, I ... I was going to use this to forget. I brewed it in potions class and thought I needed it badly" her voice was a quiver of emotion as new tears threatened once more, she managed somehow to stop them though.
"I didn't want to remember what has happened. Is that so wrong Willie?" she knew it was wrong to ask him when he wouldn't know the whole story, would she really be able to relay it again? Andy wasn't sure but she felt comfortable and safe here with him, almost as she used to when her father or uncle Patrick had been around. Right now he was the closest thing she had to a father figure in her life. She didn't want to jeopordise that for anything.

 

[Groundskeeper Willie]

The gruff groundskeeper leaned back against the wall and thought about the young girl's plight for a moment and it wasn't readily apparent that he was even listening all that closely. After a few moments with the only sound being that of the rain thundering down upon the roof of the old shed he leaned forward again and held out his hand to reveal a long scar that twisted up his forearm from his wrist to just below his elbow.

"You see this scar...I lost a close friend on the night I got that and let me tell you, there have been plenty of times I wish I could have forgotten the whole thing...just wiped that scar, that night, everything clear away..." Willie stated, looking straight at Andy. "Sometimes I look at that scar and I see ugliness and pain, but well, that scar is part of me, part of who I am...I don't know if this'll make sense to you or not, but I figure if you try and wipe away something that's made you who you are then you're not really you anymore...you're just something less..." Willie's voice trailed off and he dropped his gaze to the floor between them.

He knew this girl had gone through something terrible, but he also believed in the words that whatever doesn't kill us makes us stronger. He had a feeling that the young girl across from him was stronger than most.

 

[Andromeda Fiorelli]

Andromeda leaned forward to see the scar on his arm, it was pretty grotesque but she didn’t give any sign of being repulsed by it. She knew that if they were to get into a contest about who had the more scars and the worst, she would probably win. She listened to every word he said knowing it made sense and grateful for his words. Her eyes dried in the process and her breathing had a slight catch to it as she tried to regain her composure.

“You mean like in the face of adversity, our battle scars are really our badges of honour?” she looked from his scar to her own hands, the hands that became elongated with garishly long claws once a month. The soft pale skin that grew coarse thick hair. Andy looked down at her legs, wondering should she tell him. Her prosthetic charmed leg was a bigger nuisance sometimes to her than her transforming into a werewolf.

“Willie, my scars aren’t like yours” she hung her head and bit her lip, this would be hard. She loved this gentle giant infront of her as if he were another uncle, she had so much respect for him. This would definitely be worse than telling her friends in Gryffindor or indeed telling Bruin. If Willie could consider her type of scars as a badge of honour, a physical memory of the burdens thrown at her she might have the hope of doing so herself. She had never before considered what had happened to her in the way Willie thought of his scar. It was a revelation but did it really apply to her.

 

[Groundskeeper Willie]

Willie noticed that Andy appeared to perk up a little and nodded silently in agreement with her comment about scars being like badges of honour. Of course, he'd have never have been able to say it quite so eloquently, but he agreed with the sentiment entirely. And then the girl dropped her head and it seemed as if the brief gust of wind that had filled her sails momentarily fell calm and silent. She seemed to be waiting for an encouraging breeze to fill them again, but he hadn't the slightest idea how to help.

"That's good..." he stated finally. "Scars are just a mark left by our stories, our victories and our defeats, nothing more and nothing less, but those marks are what make us special..." Another prolonged silence fell over the shed and then Willie broke it. "Listen kid, I've seen a fair bit in my days and pretty much nothing surprises me anymore. I ain't much for words and stuff, but you always struck me as being pretty strong. I doubt there's anything you can tell me that'd faze me or that you ain't strong enough to deal with..."

 

[Andromeda Fiorelli]

Andromeda listened to him quietly without interuption. She knew she had to tell him, there was nothing else to do. He wouldn't judge her harshly she was almost certain of that now, at least she hoped so. Shuffling around on the ground though, she moved over beside where he was sitting. She stayed on the ground and rested her head against his knee the way she used to when her father had been alive. There had always been a comfort in this, her father had never been able to see her face when she had something serious to relate to him. He always knew when she sat like this that she needed him to listen, to be there for her and he always had been. She wasn't expecting the same from Willie but it just felt better, felt right to sit like this facing away from him as she told him everything.

Andy told him about the halloween feast in first year and of her taking off to dance under the full moon alone, how she had neared the forest and been attacked. Pausing to regain some composure as the retelling of this story always upset her, Andy went on to tell him of the werewolf biting her again and again. How Professor Rambolt had come to her rescue and then Headmistress Barker. She told him what she now was and related the times she had been taken to the cavern and her transformations, the taking of her potion. Her mother remarrying and removing her from Hogwarts and sending her to Durmstrang. The story seemed never ending as time ticked away and Andromeda continued her narrative. The torturing at the hands of the DA professor, the scars she carried now and the leg she no longer had. She touched her left leg explaining about the charmed prosthetic limb. Going on she related how her mother hadn't believed her in any of the letters she had written and that in the end it was her godmother who had shown up at Durmstrang demanding they release her. At which point Andromeda was already extremely ill in the hospital. For most of the summer she continued, healers from St. Mungos attempted to cure her of her nightmares and the devastation done to her body and mind.

It felt like hours had passed as she recounted everything to him, she wasn't sure exactly how much time had gone by she just knew she was tired and her throat was parched from so much talking. Keeping her head on his knee she waited for what he would say to her, his judgement of her.

 

[Groundskeeper Willie]

Willie didn't like kids as a rule, but felt strangely comfortable around this particular girl. He had an odd sort of protective feeling for her and when she moved over to sit near him he just sat there stoically offering what little shelter and comfort he could from the damp weather and dark tale that she spun. There were many times throughout the story when he felt like speaking up, speaking out against the injustice of it all, but he did what he usually did and kept his yap shut tightly, gritting his teeth occasionally when considering what he'd like to do to some of the people who had wronged her.

He remembered hearing something of the werewolf attack back a few years ago, but had no idea that this was the girl until now and he sat in stunned silence for quite some time. "Well lass, it appears that life has dealt you a pretty crappy hand up til now, but the way I see it you've still got some chips on the table to play with. Something you should know about cards is that things have a way of balancing out if you can stick it out long enough and wait for that good hand to finally come your way." Willie didn't know if the girl had any idea what cards were, but he hoped she got the message. "It sounds to me that your due some better cards pretty soon..." He added, shaking his head as he did so.

 

[Andromeda Fiorelli]

Andromeda listened and some glimmer of hope seemed to ignite inside her. He was right wasn't he? Everything couldn't keep going bad for her. She had tried to understand why her karma had gone completely the other way after her father died, when he had been alive everything had been like a bed of roses. Or was she just remembering it that way? Perhaps this bad streak couldn't go on forever. She yawned as her head remained against the groundskeepers knee, she felt safe and secure for the first time in ages.

Somehow she also knew that no nightmares would attempt to haunt her here, Willie just wouldn't let them.
"I think so too..." another yawn, her eyelids began to droop, "definitely need a new pack of cards".
Her voice was almost slurred as she began to drift off into slumber land. She hadn't been so relaxed or so at ease for a long time, she had been reassured by such simple words. It was also possibly the factual way they were spoken that had helped. Almost as if, if Willie said it would be so then by everything magical, it would be so! She allowed sleep to overcome her, the hand that held the potion fell gently to her lap and opened. The vial with the potion rolled to the floor.

 

[Groundskeeper Willie]

Willie chuckled slightly to himself at the girl's drowsy reply and it wasn't for a few minutes that he realized that she had drifted off to sleep. It was obvious that this girl needed some rest and, as she had said, a new pack of cards. Willie eased out of his jacket and laid it over Andy's legs, careful not to disturb her and then leaned back and took a short sip from his flask. The warmth that he usually felt in his throat seemed to spread a little further throughout his chest for some reason. A faint smile crossed his lips as Willie came to the realization that he'd do everything he could to help ensure that some better cards fell Andy's way soon. With his free foot, he kicked the empty vial away from her and watched as it rolled beneath a shelf, the only thing that needed to be forgotten on this cold, damp afternoon.

 

[Andromeda Fiorelli]

She didn't know how long she was out for but Andy woke with a slight crick to her neck, otherwise she felt pretty good. Better than she had felt in a long time, looking down she saw a jacket across her legs and slowly raising her head she saw where she was and remembered what had happened. Shyly she turned to look up at Willie.
"Sorry I fell asleep I guess I was pretty beat" she moved the jacket from her and folded it up before handing it back to him.

She got up slowly and stretched out a little, she felt as stiff as a board once up. Still not believing she had managed to sleep and so soundly Andromeda turned to Willie.
"Thank you, for listening and everything" she smiled sheepishly at him, "I guess I should head back before I'm missed at the school".
She moved slowly to the door and then stopped and returned to him. With a big smile now she flung her arms about him in a grateful hug.
"Thanks Willie" she released him after a moment and all but ran to the door, pushing it open and seeing that the rain had finally stopped ran back to the castle. In all that time she didnt once think about the vial, not once wished she had taken the potion. She felt at peace, something she hadn't felt in a long time. A new pack of cards, she smiled the whole way back to the school, she was going to make sure she would play with a whole new deck.

 

[Groundskeeper Willie]

Willie had leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes himself as Andy slumbered, but opened them as soon as he noticed her shifting her position, accepting his jacket back as she got to her feet. He followed suit and muttered a gruff "No problem..." as she thanked him and headed for the door.

Willie was caught a little off guard when she stopped and returned to him for a hug. He patted her on the back awkwardly as he stared over the top of her head, happy to see the smile on her face and thinking that it had brightened his day more effectively than the end of the rain. Willie watched with a grin as the girl sprinted across the grounds and up towards the castle. He hoped that Andy knew, without him having said it, that he would be here for her whenever she might need him in the coming months.