Why Does My Life Suck?

Kate Archer

Kate Archer

Well-Known Member
Messages
4,117
OOC First Name
Johanna
Wand
Knotted 16 1/2 Inch Sturdy Cherry Wand with Billywig Stinger Core
Age
5/2015
Kate woke up feeling okay.Kate yawned and sat up.She wasn't feeling to bad this morning there was only a slight thumping in her head that she found was there constantly.She sighed and went to the bathroom and splashed cold water on her face to wake her up.She then took a long look at her re flextion.She had small bags under her eyes and there was no shin to her face.There seemed to be more worry lines on her face too.Kate let out a frustrated sigh and stomped out of the bathroom.She got out her make up and went back into the bathroom and attempted to make herself look better.The foundation did cover most of the bags and the mascara made her eyes look bigger and the lip gloss gave her lips a healthy shine.More satisfied this time.She got dressed and walked towards the Great Hall.Kate was scared.She really was she didn't know what was wrong with her.The doctors had told her it should of been over by now but it wasn't.She had tried her tablets the meditation but it never stopped the constant thumping in her head and the over-welming panic she got sometimes.She would also start randomly sweating at times even after she had showered.Kate groaned,her life sucked at the moment.What had she done to deserve this?Kate didn't know but she was calling him/her/it every name under the sun.She walked into the Great Hall and sat down at the middle of the long table.She saw a few people she knew and she smiled pretending that everything was okay.She took some fruit salad and some cereal and two glasses of water.She was often becoming dehydrated lately so she usually took lots of water.After breakfast she walked to the entrance of the Great Hall and contemplated what to do next.The courtyard popped into her mind so she started to make her way there.She breathed in the cool morning fresh air and felt an immediate calm come over her.She walked over to a bench and sat down and closed her eyes.
 
Tara woke up when she heard someone walking around in her dorm, opening her eyes slightly she saw that it was Kate. It was rather early and she was in the middle of a nice dream so she closed her eyes and tried to find it again. unfortunately it seemed to have gone. ten minutes later she woke up again this time most of the dorm was up. she too got up had a quick shower and got dressed. she headed down to the great hall and just as she was entering she saw kate leave. she quickly picked up some pancakes and strawberries and taking her breakfast with her headed out the way she had seen her friend go. she didn't have to go far to find her. as soon as she entered the courtyard she saw her witting alone.
she didn't seem like herself, she hadn't done for a while. so she took a seat next to her and after a moment spoke up "Kate, are you okay" she said. the last time she had properly spoken to her friend she had said that she hadn't been feeling well. she hoped that it wasn't getting any worse.
 
Even though this was one of her good days,Kate felt as if the weight of the world was on her shoulders.She wanted to be a normal healthy person.Not someone who was a witch and had something seriously wrong with her.Kate had been asking herself after the last few days would magic be a part of her life once she left here?Kate liked magic but it was music that she knew was her thing.She didn't think she would be a part of the magical world.Though she doubted that was possible,magic would always be a part of her whether she liked it or not.Kate sighed and fought the urge to scream.Her life was a total mess,it sucked and Kate couldn't wait until everything was back to normal.She felt and saw the outline of someone beside her.For some reason her vision was a bit blurred.It wasn't until she saw a drop appear on the ground that she realized she was crying.Kate heard Tara speak and she looked up.She probably looked terrible.Her mascara must be running from crying. She smiled at Tara "No not really"She said sniffing and wiping her tears away. "I must look terrible"She said a small laugh escaping.Funny how you could be crying one minute and laughing the next.There really must be something wrong with herself.
 
Tara realised that Kate was crying. she put her arm around her friends shoulder to comfort her. she hated seeing people upset. and Kate was one of her closest friends which made it worse. she could tell that her last question was pointless, people usually didn't cry when they were fine, at least not on their own in the empty courtyard in winter. she corected herslef to the question "What's wrong?" she asked letting the girl wipe away her tears. she reached onto her pocket and offered her a couple of tissues. when kate said she must look terrible she shook her head. "No you don't, you are one of the prettiest girls i know but maybe we should get you cleaned up a little, but before we do we may as well got to the root of the problem even if if i cant solve it, sharing it helps" she said, it was true, both aspects, Kate was pretty (both inside and out) and she had always found sharing a problem helped relieve it.
 
Kate put her head on Tara's shoulder and started crying again.She felt comforted by her friends arm around her,she felt as if someone in the world actually cared.Kate sat up after a few minutes "Thanks"She said taking the tissues and wiping away her tears and blowing her nose.She felt a small bit better now that she had let go of some of her frustration.She had been like a coke can ready to explode and she felt a small better after relieving the pressure.Kate smiled.She knew she could always count on Tara. "Well you know before the summer I didn't feel that well"She began fiddiling with her hands "Well over the summer I went to the doctors and they said I had a nervous disorder meaning there was too much adrenelin in my system and it was making my heart pound and it was also the cause to my sleeping problems and the occasional panic attacks,they said if I took it easy and did the meditation and took the right tablets I should be fine within four or five months"She said feeling the tears well up because she was scared of what was happening to her "But its getting worse,I'm getting more and more panic attacks I've had two in the last five days,my head aches are now constant,and even when its a good day there is always a dull pounding. I'm sweating for now reasons and I'm always awoken feeling extremely panicky"Kate said her voice had risen as she had been taking.She took deep breaths knowing she was setting herself up for a panic attack.She closed her eyes and calmed. When she opened her eyes she put her head in her hands "I'm a complete mess"She said wondering why did her life have to suck.
 
Tara could see that Kate was calming down a little. she listened as her friend explained her disorder, she understood what a nervous disorder was, and she had a vague idea what adrenaline was, but she hadn't been trained in anything medical, she only knew that adrenaline was what you got in tricky situation. "well it looks like they know whats going on" she said before realising that there was more. as she listened to her friend, she wished that she could help Kate first hand, but she knew very little about medicine. she wished that she could make Kate feel better. she tried to remember if her friends family were magic or muggle. "did you go to muggle doctors, or healers?" she asked wondering if it was something that maybe healers could find something muggle doctors couldn't because she had heard that some diseases were magic like dragon pocks. she could see her friend starting to get worked up again and she let her go ready to harm her down as she didn't want her to have a panic attack on her. "come on Kate take a few deep breaths and try and relax." she said letting her try and get back to normal. "you are no more of a mess than the rest of us, just a different kind of mess" she said, she hoped that it was true, everyone had their own mess. hers was still having feelings for Dymetris whilst being engaged to Praneil.
 
Kate started thinking about her health.There must of been something they've missed she said to herself.She had a feeling it was something much more dangerous then they thought.Kate decided she would write a letter to her parents and tell them because she couldn't take it anymore.She wanted to see the doctors or the healers of whatever becasue she wasn't going to sit around and fell sorry for herself she had to do something.It was her health she had to fix it. "Muggle doctors but I think they've missed something"She said voicing her thoughts. Or else they knew something and they just weren't telling her,but surely that would be to cruel,or maybe they were unsure of what was wrong with her.Kate's mind was whirling and that wasn't a good thing because she could hear and fell the head ache more clearly now.Kate did as Tara said and took deep breaths and relaxed.She immediately felt bad,she had forgotten about Tara "I'm sorry Tara,how are things going"She said knowing what was happening to Tara was totally unfair.It must be horrible to have feelings for someone but are engadged to someone else,it was almost like a book you would read now days. Kate looked at the two rings on Tara's finger,Kate hoped she would have one two some day when she was a lot older.She knew Tara's family were doing what they thought best. "Tara have you really talked to your family about this arangement"She asked her tone serious.Her family wanted her to be happy and she was sure if they knew how she felt about Dymentris they might change their minds.
 
OOCOut of Character:
sorry if it is a little lame

Tara wanted to do anything to help her friend, If she could she would have find a way to split the problems and take some off her she would but she couldn't. so she would at least try and help her get better. "They may have done, they are human and no one is perfect. Maybe it would be good idea to get another diagnosis" she said agreeing with her friend. If the doctors had said that she would be getting better in a few months and she was getting worse then her treatment didn't seem to be working.
Tara realised that kate had taken something different out of her comment than she meant, or maybe she head unintentionally meant it, either way now was not the right time to talk about herself. "I am fine, there is no need to worry about me" she said, answering the question, "I cant talk to my family, they wont understand. anyway like you said last year is isn't as bad as it could be." she said she had over the break gotten used to the idea, it wasn't a bad pairing, in fact is was a very good pairing for her family but it just wasn't the pairing that she wanted most. and she wasn't sure if it was just her imagination and optimism or if it was real but Praneil hadn't looked particularly happy about the situation either. It was probably just her mind playing tricks on her though so she hadn't mentioned it or even thought about much.
 
Kate nodded cursing the doctors for making a mistake.But as Tara said nobody was perfect,its just they were paid enough money to not make mistakes.Kate was going to write a letter home because she couldn't live with the worry and it was dangerous,she could have cancer for all she knew,but that was very unlikely."I'll write a letter home"She said feeling a small but better.This was just another obstacle in life that she was going to overcome because life was to short to worry about these sorts of things.
Kate wasn't convinced,it might be a better match then others but it was an arranged match none the less."I suppose"Kate said wincing when there was a paticular thump went through her skull. "Whens the wedding?"She asked,it sounded very foreign in her mouth to be saying that to her friend,it wasn't something you got to say everyday.

OOCOut of Character:
I'm sorry its so bad :doh:
 
Tara smiled and nodded in encouragement for kate. it was a good plan and there wasn't any harm in doing it was there, if it meant a proper diagnosis than that was good, if nothing happened it wouldn't be bad.Thats a good plan" she said realising that she should write to her parents soon too, and se how they and her brother were doing, the last she had hers was during the summer break.
She didn't like the conversation being on her, especially the topic but it seemed better for kate than talking about kates illness, and that is all that mattered at the time being. "I actually managed to get my criteria for this through the parent scrutiny. I said I didn't want to marry when i was still at school, Although my family didn't like that thought a first thankfully the patils agreed with me, I think it's because Mrs Patil is a teacher. so it will Probably be the break after we graduate" she said, to her "you will certainly be getting an invite when the time comes" she said smiling at her friend.
Deciding to change the topic again she looked down at her bag. "how are you fining school os far?I think that they seem to bee giving us a lot of work seeing as the OWLs aren't until next year"
OOCOut of Character:
sorry if it is lame, my muse has left me and i need to sleep
 
Kate smiled and felt better.Kate noticed Tara looked a bit uncomfortable and she couldn't blame her really,Kate wasn't planning on talking about her wedding(If she ever has one) for another couple of years.Kate was glad that it would be after school,that gave her another three years.Kate had to say she was looking forward to go to her friends wedding even though it was incrediably selfish.It would hopefully be a nice day and maybe Tara would enjoy herself. Kate sighed,trying to do your homework with a bad headache,not much sleep and sometimes sweaty palms was not very easy especially since they were getting tonnes more "Ugh its okay,though they are giving us a load"Kate said sighing and gently massaging her temples.She would breath a sigh of relief when the holidays came,even if she would scared to see what the doctors would say,she was sick and tired of not knowing what was wrong with her. "What about you?"She asked

OOCOut of Character:
Its okay,I'm not much better either xD
 
Tara looked around the courtyard as there was a slight pause in the conversation, she was happy to see the signs of spring fast approaching. leaves on the trees, and some spring blossom forming in the plant beds. also there was a lot more blue in the sky than there had been recently, which was also a good thing. "I am finding that they are giving us a lot of work, but thankfully it is still bearable, though i am not looking forward to OWLS next year" she said. seeing that kate was massaging her temples she smiled weekly not sure what to say. then remembering her pancakes she picked up the plate. she waved her wand and muttered the charm to reheat it. "do you want some" she asked offering her friend the fork. the picked up a strawberry off the side and ate it.
 
Kate followed Tara's gaze and realized that spring was fast approaching. There was buds on the trees and the days were much brighter and longer.Kate smiled "Nether I am"Kate said. The OWLS was like the Irish version of the Junior Cert that funnily you did in third year. But you were thirteen when you started secondary school there.So her friends in Ireland would be in their third year now. Kate did miss them sometimes and she had kept in contact with one or two but with the move to Hogwarts and then England it had been hard. Also the fact you couldn't use electrical items on the ground meant she couldn't text them and she was hardly going to sent them a letter via owl. They would think she's gone cracked. Kate was surprised when Tara had a plate f pancakes in her hand,Kate hadn't noticed them before and when she reheated them they smelled yummy. "Yes please"She said sitting up straighter and rubbing her rumbling stomach. "What would I do with out you Tara"She said really meaning it. She really had no one else to talk to and Tara was a really close friend,someone she knew she wouldn't be able to survive with out.
 
Tara laughed slightly, as kate said that she too was glad that she didn't want to do her OWLs either. "I don't know how the seventh years do it. At home, most people of my class don't even start secondary school so i am lucky to have the chance to complete schooling" she said. she hadn't told anyone that before but it wasn't a secret at all, it was just how it happened where she was. "there you go, Help yourself." she said, she wasn't too hungry herself, she would get something else when she went back inside. "well you wouldn't be eating pancakes right now, but i am sure you would make do with something else, maybe cornflakes" she said jokingly taking another one of the strawberries "I am sure you would get on fine, you are a lot stronger than you seem" she said seriously. she had an odd knack of reading people, however he always saw the good things in people never the bad. she put her arm around her friends shoulders again ready to comfort her again if she needed to.
 
Kate agreed,she didn't want to even think that far ahead though. "Really? If I had started secondary school in Ireland I'd be in my third year and funnily enough I would be doing an exam just like the OWLs"Kate said wondering how her friends were coping.Kate reached over and picked a strawberry,they were nice and they reminded her of the ones she grew at home. "Yum,thanks"She said before taking a bit of the top pancake and eating it.They were pretty good pancakes and since Kate hadn't had one in a while it made it taste even nicer.Kate laughed "That's right"She said smiling and taking another bit off the pancake.Kate shrugged she wasn't sure about that but then again she had recovered from her last ordeal she was sure she could get through this. Kate hugged Tara "Thanks"She whispered glad to know there was someone looking out for her.
 
Tara nodded, "Seriously thats pretty cool. I would probably have finished school by now, if i wasn't here, thats why i want to stay at school as long as i can." she said not wanting to dwell on the topic. it was just one of the things that was normal where she was but people here found it wrong. but where she lived there was no need for higher education but money was necessary. she watched kate eat a pancake, it looked so good she picked up one of the other ones. "Its okay, i took extra in case you wanted any." she said taking a bite out of hers. "they are pretty good, even reheated" she said taking another bite. "your welcome" she said hugging kate back glad that she wast going to go into another panic attack.
 
Kate nodded,she had heard about the situations with school in India. She understood where they were coming from but maybe if they completed their education they could get better money for the family. Kate wasn't sure and it wasn't exactly her place to comment so she kept quiet.Kate smiled as Tara took a pancake. They were really nice and Kate took another one. "Sure are"She said grinning and taking another bit of her pancake. All she needed was nutella pr golden syrup and she's be perfect. Kate smiled as Tara hugged her back. Again she was comforted by the fact that there was someone there who cared. Kate had only told Tara about her illness though sh had involuntarily showed Jake. She hoped that didn't happen here. So instead she picked another strawberry and ate it. "So any news"She asked not wanting to talk about schools,illnesses or weddings. Some nice small talk was nice every once and a while.
 
Tara was glad that kate didn't talk about school n india, like many things (marriage, festivals, dressing, and other social protocols) it was different there than it was here, and that caused people to see it as wrong, It wasn't, just different. she watched few younger students pass by it felt odd that they were now fourth years, and had made it to the middle of the school. Next year would be fifth year the beginning of being an older student, the owls were n obvious thing that happened then, but also prefects were chosen, she was sure that kate would be the female one from her house but she didn't know who who male one would be. she thought for a second about Kate's question, before shaking her head, "nothing interesting has happened, how about you, have you got any news?" she asked wondering what else was going on in her friends life.
 
Kate watched as students passed and she thought back to when she had been like that. She would be a senior student next year and prefects would be picked OWLS would be starting and it would be a stressful year. She was curious as to who would be their prefects. Kate wasn't sure if there would be any male candidates. Maybe they would pick to females? Kate didn't know but she hoped Tara would be picked because she was so nice and would be a great help the all the younger students. Kate shook her head " Nope,life is rather boring at the moment"She said laughing. For once other than her illness everything was normal and things were like they should be. Things were great with Stefan and things were okay with Sara too. If only she wasn't so sick everything would be perfect.Kate looked up at the sky and the clouds and imagined further on. "I'd love to go into space"She said. It was random but Kate had voiced her thoughts out loud.
 
Tara realised she missed first and second year, she missed how simple it had been. fourth year wasn't so bad but third year had not been kind to her. "well boring is better than drama i guess" she said. she was a very calm person and hated conflict. then two things happened at once, firstly Kate said something about wanting to go into space, and the bell rang. "I guess it could be fun, I don't know if i would like to though, i would rather keep my feet on the earth." she said, before getting up and saying "Is it that time already, am meant to be in herbology". She offered kate a hand up she was pretty sure that her friend was meant to be in the same class as her but she wasn't sure. "scourgify" she said cleaning the now empty plate. and putting it in her bag, she would leave it in the great hall when she returned for lunch.
OOCOut of Character:
i thought we may as well end the thread as it was getting kind of slow
 
Kate nodded,boring was much better than drama. Kate smiled,she would love to go p there and see the world from space or land on the moon it would be unreal but sadly they don't send people up there anymore because its to expensive.Kate sighed when she heard the bell knowing she should be going to class now. "Same"She said taking Tara's hand and standing up. She gave herself a quick brush down before picked up her back "Lets go to herbology?"She said she was almost sure Tara was so Kate started to make her way down.

OOCOut of Character:
yeah I thought so too
 
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