We're A Mess Together

[Phoebe Callwell]

Phoebe Callwell's Decision was rash, stupid even. Her parents had doubted her abilities to make it in a school, but after spending a semester with neither of her best friend Phoebe felt lost. She wasn't a person who was easy to get along with all the time. She was stubborn, and she wouldn't let anyone help her - not even Rudolf. Besides all of that, frankly Phoebe was missing Rudolf. She missed him more than she should have been allowed to. After all she wasn't sure if they were still together he was very far away now after all. After the night at the Yule ball when they'd both said they loved each other, Phoebe thought about him a lot. However she feared bothering him, and hadn't written since he'd started at his new school. After all, what if when he moved away he realized how silly it was to tell a fifteen year old girl that he loved her, and that she was the only girl he'd liked for so long. A new school offered new people - new friends and relationships. However, Phoebe was stubborn, it was the Gryffindor at heart.

The blonde had decided around the end of her first semester at Hogwarts that she wanted to transfer, and applied before telling her parents. Since starting her own form of writing practice Phoebe had gotten fairly good at doing so. The biggest help was placing a finger on the letter she'd written before and placing the quill next to it. It got ink on her hands sometimes, but it was a small price to pay , for through determination some people were more easily able to read what she had to say. She smiled in her own pride, zipping up the sweater she'd chosen. After all, it was cold currently in the america's where she attended school now. The thin teen had asked her mom to put braile on her clothing and help her with learning how to pair colors, she'd even gotten a braille book on how to pair colors. She couldn't go wrong with black and blue.

This was her first day after all, new school, no friends. She wasn't sure that people would help her. She took out her point me cane and walked from her room into a new life. She had one purpose if she was honest, and that was to start by finding one of the Lagowskis (Preferrably Rudolf) - from there she could make friends. The cane tapped on the floor mostly from her being bored, considering it had a charm on it. Listening intently she tried to pick out a familiar voice, in a sea of many.

 

[Rudolf Lagowski]

The holidays never seemed to last very long for Rudolf. Maybe it was because he loved it so much at home, or because he was older now, and time passed more quickly than it had done when he'd been a kid, but whatever the reason, he always felt a little sad for it. Ilvermorny was great, and all, but Rudolf missed James and Phoebe more than he'd ever missed anyone in his whole life. He missed the late-night dormitory chats with his best friend, and he missed staring at Phoebe across the room instead of doing any work. Why hadn't he asked her out? They'd sort of said they loved each other, but nothing had ever been made official. Rudolf had been scared, he guessed, of being rejected again. Phoebe did a lot of rejecting - something he'd learned the hard way, over and over again. Still, Rudolf was nothing if not determined, which was why he hadn't stopped kicking himself since he'd transferred out. Sure, he could still write, but asking someone out from the other side of the world just... didn't have the same kind of feel to it.

Rudolf didn't have any classes for a whole hour, so he was whiling away the time trading chocolate frog cards with Reuben, trying to complete his set. It had only taken seven years! Reuben was just about the only good thing about Ilvermorny. Rudolf regretted the years now he'd spent pushing his twin away - truth be told, he needed him. And now that they were both studying to become Aurors, they shared all of the same classes, which made them a bit more bearable.

"Nah, I've got three of them," he said, sighing. "I can't believe I'm still four short. I'm never gonna-" the Wampus left his sentence hanging. No. Surely it wasn't... He was seeing things. He was definitely seeing things. The stress of being a sixth year had gotten to him, and he was hallucinating, and he would have to go to St. Mungos right away, because that was not Phoebe Callwell. Without a word of explanation to Reuben, Rudolf stood up and started walking towards her, everything but the space between them suddenly disappearing. It was her. He had no idea how or why she'd come here, but it was her. And she was older, even more beautiful - if that were possible. But it was her.

Suddenly he was close enough that if she took another step forward, her cane would hit his ankle. "Phoebe," he said. "What - why - what are you...?" He couldn't think what he wanted to ask, so instead he reached out and touched her arm, giving her a moment's warning before he wrapped his arms around her and squeezed her tightly into a hug.

 

[Phoebe Callwell]

it was odd. It felt hopeless that Phoebe was looking for Rudolf considering she couldn’t see him. Though the ex-Gryffindor was much more accepting of her condition she still felt quite a bit of melencholy when she thought of what she’d never be able to do. Like see the guy she’d said she loved, read anchoring tunes with her eyes, actually be able to sit and read a non Braille book. The blonde sighed and stopped walking for a short moment, adjusting her jeans up a little before she continued a short lived walk.

It took a few moments for a voice to carry into her ears, and only a few seconds for her to be wrapped in a suffocating bear hug. Phoebe wanted to be clever or playfully mean but she was so overjoyed that she leapt up onto him, legs around his torso head buried firmly in his shoulder, nearly crying she was so happy. “I missed you you big idiot.” She said, moving to nuzzle into his collarbone. “Turns out just about any school will accept a blind girl for fear of being told by won’t accept her cause she’s blind.” She hugged him tighter. “I’m sorry I didn’t write.” She apologized, almost feeling too overwhelmed to talk. “But you did not write either. So we’re even...”

 

[Rudolf Lagowski]

Rudolf nearly staggered backwards when Phoebe launched herself into his arms. He laughed into her hair, giddy with happiness. Phoebe had never been so affectionate or excited before, and he hoped the change was permanent. Not that he didn't love her in every mood, but he certainly preferred this to the constant pain of rejection. "You transferred?" he said, in momentary disbelief, until he thought about how she was wandering the corridors of Ilvermorny school and probably wasn't just here on a field trip. He flushed a bit when she pointed out he hadn't written - but as she said, they were pretty much even. "I'm so sorry. I wanted to, I swear. I'm just not that good with words, and I didn't know what to say. Merlin, I missed you so, so much." He hugged her tighter. "I can't believe you're here. This is like, a dream." Carefully he lowered Phoebe back down onto her feet, but his body stayed close to hers, his thumb brushing her cheek. "Can I kiss you?"

 

[Phoebe Callwell]

Phoebe laughed with him. “No I just snuck in for the day.” She sarcastically replied. She was a little sad for lack of contact when Rudolf let her down, but she couldn’t cling like a baby wombat forever and she knew that. “It’s okay. Couldn’t read it anyways.” She joked. Of course someone would have read it to her. She laughed again and looked past him as she always tended to do. He asked permission. He asked if he could kiss her. Did that mean he hadn’t found another girl that was willing to jump all over him like she was? “No new girlfriend then?” She asked before nodding as permission. However before they kissed she made one more sarcastic remark. “Must be ugly, good think I’m blind huh?” She then leaned forward and waited patiently for him to kiss her.

 

[Rudolf Lagowski]

"You're a dork," Rudolf told Phoebe, shaking his head. Man, he loved her. He'd always loved her. From the moment he'd laid eyes on her in his first year, he'd known she was the girl he would marry. Phoebe had taken a while to get onto the same page, but she'd come around eventually - or at least, Rudolf assumed she had. Why else would she have transferred to Ilvermorny? He grinned. "Nowhere near as ugly as you," he said. Then, before she could reply, he leaned in and kissed her on the lips.

 

[Phoebe Callwell]

Phoebe laughed and was about to protest, but instead her mouth was covered by Rudolf’s. She threw arms around his neck and pulled him as close to her as he could get. Absence truly made the heart grow fonder. Phoebe couldn’t get enough of the way Rudolf tasted, smelled, everything about him. The blonde smiled and finally broke the kiss breathlessly. This was what she’d waited for. “You aren’t gonna tell me you’re really Reuben and just takin one for the team are you?” She spoke only half joking. Phoebe was conpletely unaware that Reuben had been her first kiss and that Rudolf knew anything. She had never been told. The petite Wampus toyed with his hair. “You still just as smart here? Or are the other boys racing’s Laps around you, Mr. Future Auror?”

 

[Rudolf Lagowski]

Rudolf could have stood there kissing Phoebe in the middle of the corridor for hours. It was only their second ever kiss, but it was the best yet; Phoebe's lips on his were as oxygen to blood, flooding him with life, restoring strength to his body. He'd never wanted or needed anybody so much - and she was here. She was really here.

After Phoebe pulled away, Rudolf snorted. "You think Reuben can kiss like that?" Actually, seeing as he'd managed to make Saveli his girlfriend, maybe he could, but Rudolf wasn't going to mention that. He smiled as Phoebe played with his hair, admiring the softness of her face and the colour of her lips. She really was the most beautiful girl in the world. "I'm still pretty smart," he said, stroking her hair. It was so weird, being able to stroke her hair. It was like the distance between them had strengthened their feelings for one another, and now they were afraid to let go. "I can't believe you transferred. Why did you do it? Don't you miss HNZ?"

 

[Phoebe Callwell]

Phoebe giggled. “Don’t know if he can or not. I could ask his girlfriend. But frankly I don’t know if I want to know.” She remarked with a strange look that was a mix between being grossed out at the thought, and humor. She felt his hand in her hair and while it was a new kind of tactile attention, she thoroughly enjoyed it. She laughed again, “relatively.” She spoke softly, ever teasing to the boy whom she once thunked with her cane.

Phoebe sighed when he questioned her. It was complicated. She didn’t want to admit she felt lost without him. Hell she always felt a little lost. However it was easier to be honest. “I missed you. A lot. Things weren’t the same. Call me stupid but I transferred because I lost my best friend.” She then nudged him. “Besides you need someone to keep you out of trouble.” She moved forward and hugged the man again, she could get used to being close to him but a professor walked by and cleared their throat at them. Phoebe assumed it wasn’t a student as the voice was much too deep and sounded old. She pulled away. “So how have things been? You, Rueben, the family. How about Saveli and Monty? Tell me all about what’s happened. No girls I need to fend off now?”

 

[Rudolf Lagowski]

Rudolf definitely didn't want to think too long about his brother kissing anybody. He was sure he'd never get over the fact Reuben was dating Saveli. Seriously - how many gallons of Amortentia had he had to slip into her butterbeer to make that happen? Still, Rudolf was happy for Reuben. A little miffed that his brother had gotten a girlfriend before him, but happy.

The Wampus's mouth opened slightly. Phoebe had transferred because she'd missed him? That was, assuming she didn't have some other friend at Ilvermorny he didn't know about. (Rudolf, being arrogant, didn't stop to consider that.) He leaned into the hug, briefly speechless, and then pulled away with a blush as a professor walked by. "Things are... things are fine, everyone's fine. Especially me - I mean, I'm great." He rolled his eyes at her remark. He didn't even want to say something obnoxious, just to impress her. "Come on. You remember that time I asked you out to the Yule Ball in braille? I wouldn't do that for anyone else, you know. And not just 'cus most people can see. Wow, smooth, Rudolf! I did not mean to say that. See, you're the only girl who'll ever put up with me when I am the world's biggest doofus. I mean - uh - you do forgive me, right?" He cleared his throat. "Um, nothing much has happened, to be honest. I missed you, though. How have you been?"

 

[Phoebe Callwell]

Phoebe laughed at Rudolf as he spoke. This was the most ridiculous thing she'd even done for anything. She could have been injured in the new school, denied access. Her parents were worried sick and writing her every day. Was this mildly selfish of Phoebe, of course it was. She couldn't help it though, she cared so much for Rudolf. Her parents understood that when she told them that he was her sun and her moon. She was a teenage girl so of course there was an opportunity for this to fail, but considering when Phoebe was passionate about something she often didn't let go, her parents allowed this change. Besides with the deaths recently at Hogwarts or from Alumni this seemed safer.

"It's in your favor that I can't see." She teased. "Because then I might run away from your ugliness." Of course it was only teasing. Phoebe brought her hand up to his cheek to feel the slope of his cheekbones. He'd obviously lost weight in his face. He was much more like an adult now. "My parents only allowed this because they thought if they didn't I'd run away." She admitted with a small laugh. "They think it's just puppy love." She muttered. "But i know that's not true." Phoebe leaned up and placed a gentle kiss on Rudolf's lips. "I know I'm in love with you. I think I've loved you from the first time I nearly beat you with my cane." Phoebe brought herself as close to him as she could, feeling the warmth of him against her made her feel at home. This was her home. As ridiculous as teen love was, this was all Phoebe could have asked for.

 

[Rudolf Lagowski]

Rudolf snorted, trying to stay still as Phoebe touched his face. "It's in your favour, 'cus the minute you saw me you'd be blinded by my good looks anyways," he said. Then he sobered, his heart turning to goo at her tender words. He no longer cared whether any professors were present when Phoebe leaned in to kiss him - it wasn't as if he was a prefect here at Ilvermorny, anyway. He had no good reputation to uphold. He kissed Phoebe back slowly, reluctant to open his eyes after she pulled away. Sometimes, he liked to keep them closed. But their bodies were close, and he could feel the warmth of her torso against his until he wasn't really sure whose warmth he was feeling any more. Maybe it belonged to the both of them. How long had he waited to hear those words? Truthfully, he'd never expected to actually hear them. He'd made a promise to himself he'd marry Phoebe one day on the very evening he met her, but in spite of his persistence, he'd thought he might eventually have to break it. Now he wasn't so sure. Maybe they would get married, and have children, and live the life together that he'd dreamt of every night. Maybe.

"I love you so much," he whispered, eyes still closed, forehead pressed against hers. He felt a bit like crying, if he were honest. But he controlled it. "You make me the happiest I've ever been in my whole life. I didn't even know I could feel like that, you know?" Especially not since Reagan died. Rudolf wrapped his arms all the way around her and nestled his face in her neck. "Thank you."

 

[Phoebe Callwell]

Phoebe laughed and shook her head. "You continue to say these things." She argued gently, obviously not serious. "But you weren't ever asked out by any other girls." It was all in good fun, Phoebe would never say anything to hurt Rudolf's feelings, not anymore. If she didn't harass him occasionally though were they really in love? The blonde wrapped arms so closely around him she could touch her own elbows practically. The woman couldn't help but think she was so lucky, and kept her milky orbs shut as she stood in the warmth and amazing presence of Rudolf. "This is the dumbest thing I've ever thought to ask." She spoke quietly next to Rudolf. "It's not even a question." She laughed to herself again, standing as closely as she could to the Wampus sixth year. "So we..." She stopped, not quite sure of her words, her voice so silent it was only for the two of them to hear, and that much was obvious. The students passing by, footsteps vibrating the concrete if it were a large group, were barely a distraction, and while Phoebe's world was nearly always black, in this moment entwined with Rudolf she felt as if the room was bursting with all the colors her brain could remember. Reds and pinks and all the colors that love was made of. "We're together now right?" She asked, but she didn't mean it as a question. This was a statement. "Now that we're together, do you want to maybe walk me to classes so I don't need my cane? It'd be nice to go without it for a bit?" She tapped his leg lightly with it, smiling up toward where she believed his head to be according to the breath that tickled her from their close proximity.