Uncharted Territory

[April Ward]

April wasn't feeling her best. First, she had been defeated in the dueling tournament and then she had lost her Quidditch match. Though not much usually phased her, two losses in a row had put a damper on her mood. Then there was something else as well, something that had been on her mind and bugging her ever since Valentine's day. She hadn't known who to talk to about it. Geo probably knew, but it felt a little embarrassing to ask her. Out of everyone, she had decided to go to October. The two didn't always get along the best, but the girl was the closest to a sister she had. She also suspected she probably got a lot of pink roses, being very pretty.

During lunch, she made her way over to the Ravenclaw table. Choosing a meal time had been intentional, as she thought October was probably studying both before and after classes. Knowing her, she might also be studying during meal times but April had to talk to her at some point. She found October and took a seat next to her without asking, leaning her elbows on the table. "Can I talk to you?" She asked her, giving her a sideways glance. "I need advice."

 

[October Alcott]

Although it didn't feel quite as suffocating as last semester, October was beginning to feel the strain of exams looming, and with all the subjects she had taken she was stretched a little thin. She had taken to bringing her notes and textbooks everywhere with her, taking every free moment she could find to get a bit of studying done, poring over her notes while she ate a sandwich with one hand. She wanted to be prepared for her classes in the afternoon, and then spend the evening working on essays in the library. October rarely talked to anyone during meals, focusing on her notes most of the time. It was a surprise then, when April sat next to her. The two were barely on speaking terms as things were, and April approaching her wasn't something October was expecting at all. "Bonjour." She said politely, still a little stung by her stepsister's lack of interest in learning October's language. April needing advice was something she certainly hadn't expected though, and it piqued October's interest. "What do you need advice about?" She asked, thinking quietly that the most likely situation was that April had neglected to study all semester, and wanted October's help last minute. It had never happened before, but April's lack of discipline was bound to catch up to her eventually.

 

[April Ward]

April nodded quickly at her sort-of-sister's greeting. Figuring it might put her in a more helpful mood if she made a show of trying with her French. "Bonjour." She said back. She glanced sideways at the older girl, her expression unreadable. "Boys." She then paused. "Or, people. I guess. I don't know if it's a boy." She sighed deeply. "With Valentine's, I got a pink rose. It had this note." She pulled it out of her bag, though it was heavily crumpled. She placed it in front of October.

April,
Happy Valentine's Day.
Wishing I had the guts to say what I really think about you.
And I think about you a lot.
From your secret admirer.

"I'm sure you've gotten like, a ton of things like these." She said, nodding at October. The only reason the older girl wasn't dating, in April's mind, was because she was too busy with school and things like that. It couldn't be lack of interest. "What do I do with this? I don't like it." She scowled at the note, as if it had bitten her. "Do you think it could be a mistake? Or mean something other than yucky romance things?" She paused. "Or... do you know maybe of a way to find out who wrote this?"

 

[October Alcott]

October was a little surprised to hear April actually greet her back in French, but she didn't let the surprise show. It was just one greeting - she knew for a fact that April still wasn't trying to learn her language. She was distracted from her frustration though, when April said what she was looking for advice about. October didn't exactly have any experience with dating herself - there was no time for other people with the amount of time her studies took up - but it was a little touching that April would look up to her enough to want her help in this area. "Let me see..." October said slowly, tucking a stray curl back as she leaned down to read the message.

It seemed sweet and innocuous enough, and October wasn't sure why April would want her help. She blushed a bit when April said she would have gotten lots of messages like this. She hadn't, and October was fairly sure most people in her year saw her as an undateable nerd due to the amount of time she spent in the library. There was no reason to let April know that though, and she listened to her stepsister's complaints, a little surprised that April found the idea of dating so repulsive. She was still young, October supposed, and April had always been a little immature for her age. "Well..." She said slowly, thinking. "It seems quite definitely to be romantic in nature. I don't think there's a way to find out who sent it, other than asking people, but if they don't have the guts to say anything to you I don't really think you have anything to worry about. If they're too shy to even say what they mean in a message I doubt they're going to approach you. I really wouldn't pay it much thought."

 

[April Ward]

April looked carefully at October's face. The older girl was almost a sister to her, even if they weren't entirely on the best terms. She knew October would at least know what to do better than she did, which really wasn't saying much. April tapped her feet on the ground as she watched October read the note. She chewed her bottom lip as she listened to October. "It's just... it sounds like someone I know." She said, pointing at the note. "Doesn't it? Like, at least a friend, or someone who knows me." She sighed, wondering if she was making any sense at all. "It sounds sad. It makes me sad that someone is sad about me." She ran a hand over her face, frustrated with herself. "I don't know. I wish I hadn't gotten it. I feel like I have to do something with this but I don't know what! I keep wondering who sent it..." She trailed off, unsure. "It's probably silly to you." She then added with a slight frown. At least October hadn't said it herself, but April was aware the older girl valued her time. She held out her hand. "Sorry to bother you."

 

[October Alcott]

Giving advice to April felt both strange and familiar. It was odd to be in the kind of situation a real sister would be in, but at the same time it reminded her of ballet classes together, when they were little, and October had freely offered April guidance. With a pang of nostalgia for when they had been friends, October couldn't help but wonder if April danced at all anymore. Maybe... they could dance together again some time. Trying to shake off her melancholy thoughts, October shook her head slightly. "Well, if it is making them sad that's their decision." She said gently. "You haven't done anything. Rather than give you a real opportunity to make a choice about what you want from them, they've presented their feelings to you in a way you can't possibly respond to. Really, the only outcome of this message would be you either feeling flattered but unbothered with no closure, or frustrated and upset because you can't do anything. They've given you their feelings with no way to respond, positive or negative, and that was their choice. They had the option to sign their name, and either get what they wanted with you, or give you a chance to at least turn them down gracefully, and they chose to simply share their burden without giving you any options instead. That's their fault, not yours." October expected that had she recieved a similar anonymous message, she would have simply been flattered, but April's upset was clear, and considering it from the girl's perspective, it was easy to see why. The message essentially trapped her. "There's unfortunately nothing you can do, so the best thing for it is to simply continue on until the person comes forward or loses interest. It's still their choice whether to be sad or do something about this. You didn't choose to make them sad, you have no obligation to them." When April gestured for the letter back, clear that she intended to leave, October was surprised to actually find herself disappointed. Handing the message back, she hesitated before speaking. "It's fine. How... how have you been otherwise?" She asked slowly, realising with a pang how little she knew about April's life here.

 

[April Ward]

April was glad that October hadn't sent her away or dismissed her, as April had half expected her to do. She bit her lip when October said it was their decision to be sad. That didn't sound completely right to her. "Still..." She muttered. "I don't like that anyone's sad over me." She knew October had a point, that she hadn't done anything to hurt anyone. At least, not knowingly. She sighed deeply, nodding. "You're right though... thank you." October really was very smart, and she had made April feel a little better with this observation. Expecting to be dismissed now, she was surprised that October asked her how she had been. April pondered the question for a moment. "It's been mixed." She said honestly. "I'm... still mad about losing the match." She winced. "Were you watching?" The idea that October had probably seen how badly she had lost somehow made it worse. She had looked up to the older girl in their ballet days, and still looked up to her now in a lot of ways.