Closed Thought you'd heard the last of me

[Morrie Ayre]

Morrie was cleaning out her trunk when she came across a crumpled piece of parchment. She unfolded it to find the forwarding address for @Aine Thompson. Morrie had completely forgotten that Aine had given this to her before graduating. Smiling to herself, she decided to write a letter in her usual, borderline illegible scrawl and head up to the owlery to send it. Maybe the old head girl would be Morrie's ticket out of here.

Hi Aine, it's Morrie, I lost the address you gave me last year and then I found it again today so now I'm writing to you.

Hogwarts sucks so bad, can I leave Hogwarts and come and live with you? First off, the Slytherins have always been driving me absolutely mad but now it's the Hufflepuffs too. The professors aren't much better, Professor Josephs disqualified me from the dueling tournament for no good reason, and Professor Allcott-Ward called me a bully! A bully! Me?! Do you know there are also two new professors here who have like 18 kids between them? It's mad here. Oh and don't tell anyone, but I set a snake on a first year for calling me and Vanity hags.

Morrie

Second owl arrives shortly after...

Oh yeah - how are you?

 

[Aine Thompson]

Seeing an owl appear at the window of her dingy flat gave Aine something of a fright, as though the magical world was coming to claim her back when she was quite satisfied being normal for the moment, thank you very much. Not to mention it was rather irritating when she was in the middle of writing an essay and didn't need any additional distractions (that she wasn't creating for herself, at any rate). However, Aine's expression softened when she saw who the letter was from, and as difficult as it was to read she felt rather amused by the contents. Picking up some of her spare printer paper, she scrawled out a response.

Hi Morrie, it's good to hear from you!

Sorry Hogwarts continues to suck. Almost wish I was still there to keep the Hufflepuffs in line, I'll bet a few well timed glares would stop the little bastar kids from acting up. (I think Professor Alcott-Ward thought I was kind of a bully too). Though if they're kids of the professors they'll probably think they can do whatever they want. Eighteen kids??? Do they really have nothing better to do? My older sister says pregnancy is an absolute nightmare, those witches must actually be insane.

Girl in my year was pregnant, wonder how ruining her life has turned out for her now that I think about it.

I'm probably supposed to tell you not to set snakes on people but honestly if this little bit girl's going to start calling you a hag she deserves it. I can't use magic at university unfortunately, which is a shame as there's a couple of people in my tutorials I'd like to set a snake on. The type of people who give you looks like you've just farted if you breathe the same air as them, you know, like all those pureblood families do. I have to keep pretending I escaped from a wiccan cult, which isn't even entirely untrue. But it means they think I'm a bit weird. Still, that's not much different to what it was like in the Hogwarts madhouse.

I'd gladly help you escape from Hogwarts, though my landlord has ministry ties so I'm not sure he'd necessarily go for it. I'm sure we could work something out - if you know the cleaning charm you probably know just about all the magic you're actually ever going to use. I'm in the middle of an essay about a snail in a bottle which is as riveting as it sounds so I'll have a think about an escape plan, I'm sure between the two of us we can come up with something. Until then, though, don't let them try and change you because they desperately need people like us to remind them that their wizardly ways of constant breeding and what not is weird and not normal.

- Aine

 

[Morrie Ayre]

Morrie never got mail. Her mum was a muggle, and even if she had known how to send an owl, she wouldn’t bother. Morrie hadn’t seen her dad in over half her life, and there wasn’t really anyone else. It used to bother her, that empty feeling when everyone else would have their letters and gifts and she’d go without. But over the years, she’d convinced herself that she didn’t need mail, that it didn’t matter.

But today, when an owl landed right in front of her with a letter, Morrie squealed with excitement. She felt her fingers tremble as she reached out, recognising Aine’s handwriting even before she opened it. She read the letter over twice then later that day wrote out a reply to send back.

Woohoo you actually replied! That's so cool, so are we like, pen pals 4 lyf now? Or at least until I've escaped Hogwarts and come to live with you. Is the cleaning spell that Soregiffy one? I don't use it, but I'll start practicing in preparation for the great escape. Although this university sounds lame too especially the no magic bit. Ah! Have you considered punching these snooty people in the face? That's how the muggles usually resolve their differences. Or you could catch a real snake to set on them, just don't get bitten because I read somewhere that Australia has poisonous snakes. Something to do when you've finished writing about snails though. That sounds even more boring than the stuff Professor Moncrieffe gets us to write about! She doesn't like it much when I fall asleep her class but it's hard not to when it's soooo boring.

Yeah pretty much half the first year group are related somehow, but you know me, always staying out of everyone's business. Well, until recently anyway, it's harder now I'm writing for the school paper. Castillo has gone a bit crazy because Ravenclaw went ahead of us in the house cup. Hufflepuff are really missing you in that department. You know they're currently fourth and near enough 2000 house points behind third place?! I think Professor Carter is on the verge of a breakdown. Just another day at Hogwarts! Catch you later!

Morrie

 

[Aine Thompson]

Aine had never really received owls in her time at Hogwarts, so the sound of an owl tapping on the window still made her jump. This one came as she was definitely not playing games instead of working on a different assignment, and as ever, she was grateful for the distraction once the initial shock waned. She liked hearing from Morrie - it was nice to know that there were other people who could see all the things that were wrong with Hogwarts. Time away was only making Aine realise all the wrong-ness more.

I've never had a penpal before, that's kind of exciting, isn't it? I guess we are!

That's the one, it's the only spell I use much cause I hate cleaning so at least that makes it much less painful when I have to do it. I liked when they taught us spells that were actually useful but that didn't happen very much. Like, why would you ever want to mess around turning animals into different animals? They didn't do anything wrong. It'd be nice if you could turn those weird first years into animals when they start being annoying but apparently that's illegal and immoral. But they can cast the unforgivable curses on you in fourth year? It makes no sense.

I don't blame you for falling asleep in History - I think that's why they put the really intimidating teachers there to try and not have you fall asleep. I don't think Moncrieffe can do anything worse than glare at you and I don't think Borisyuk actually cares enough to do anything though so you're good. It's good someone that wasn't Slytherin won for a change (sorry) but sorry it's made Castillo kind of insufferable. And poor old Carter - he's nice but very ineffective. Maybe he needs to sit the Hufflepuffs down and tell them to have some pride in themselves because it sounds like they're a bit pathetic. If Moncrieffe ever actually has a breakdown maybe I should come back and teach history instead - but I think I'd probably get kicked out very quickly. And I'm not related to anyone there so it probably doesn't help my case. Seriously, why are they all into intermarrying? It's 2063, like, come on. Good on you for working at the paper though - hopefully they'll let you write what you want. Celia's articles were great, better than stuff about fashion accessories or whatever. At least until we can get you out of there. Do you think they'll even stop you from just not showing up next year? I'd always wondered that, it's not like there's much of an education department. Could just claim to be homeschooling I guess, doubt they'd check.

I'll come up with some official looking documents, sure it'll be good enough.

Aine

 

[Morrie Ayre]

Morrie was meant to be studying for her exams, but she prioritised replying to Aine's latest letter. Once she finished writing her reply, she carefully folded it into an envelope and made her way to the owlery just before curfew to send it. She stayed a bit longer than she should have after some challenges with the owl. She managed to send the owl in the end, and get back to the Slytherin common room without anyone noticing that she was slightly late.

Hi Aine, it's Morrie again. I’ve never had a pen pal either, but I like it.

I’ve been practicing the cleaning charm like you said, and I think I’ve got the hang of it now. Not that it really matters, since I won’t be able to use it until I’m 17, unless underage magic doesn’t apply if I’m not a Hogwarts student because they can’t exactly expel me. I’m only in third year though, which means I still have soo long here if I had to stick it out! I’m tempted to stick around for those Unforgivable Curses in fourth year. They sound interesting. But I do wonder if Professor Waldgrave should be in Azkaban right now for demonstrating them in the first place. I mean, if they’re going to punish the use of Unforgivables with life sentences in Azkaban, there shouldn’t be any exceptions, right? It doesn’t look good if Waldgrave decides to go rogue. Seriously, it’s just more reasons why Hogwarts is completely mad.

I had a good laugh at your comment about Hufflepuffs being a bit pathetic. How did you survive being in that house? I heard a Hufflepuff first year tried to switch houses earlier this year, and even took it to the headmaster, who said no. Honestly, it’s probably the smartest decision Professor Allcott-Ward has ever made, though I am still mad at him for calling me a bully.

I nearly choked when you said you’d come back to teach! I mean, it’d be cool and all, but I’m pretty sure you’d hate it. No offense, of course! Then again, we have some professors here who probably shouldn’t even be allowed to teach either so you might fit right in.

As for the paper, I haven’t been censored yet, but I'll be watching that Miranda like a hawk. If she dares to lay a quill tip on my Quidditch article, we’re going to have words! I mean, it’s totally acceptable to pick on that sniveling seeker, he stole my spot and I will have my revenge.

Morrie