Closed The Stars Are All Exploding

[Odette Madison]

[adminapproval=#30623834]Ever since getting the news about her mother, Odette had felt like she was living in a weird sort of bubble. Nothing really seemed to matter anymore, and the uncertainty of her future was the only thing weighing on her mind. The girl had made a few halfhearted attempts at studying for the OWLs, but was starting to fear this was simply not going to go well. How could she focus on exams when she had no idea where she was going to live during the winter break? The letter she had received had said something about her situation. She had still not read it completely, as she couldn't really bring herself to read every word precisely. Somehow, the half-seen words she hadn't processed yet at the bottom of the letter were a source of comfort. If she didn't know everything it said, maybe some of the things in it were less bad than she expected. From the glance she had given it, it seemed like they were going to search for an appropriate guardian for her within her family members. That probably meant they were going to try to find her dad, which wasn't going to be easy. Not only that, but Odette was pretty sure she wasn't officially on any papers as his child. There was no way he would accept her, or want her. And honestly, she didn't want him to. She had heard what he was like from Matthew, and had seen the sort of daughter he had raised in Charlotte. Matthew was perhaps another option, as he was her half-brother. But as long as her father didn't acknowledge her, she didn't think that would really matter. And more importantly, he wasn't at a point in his life where he should be taking care of a younger sister only three years his junior. He had only graduated last year, and the two of them had only spoken a handful of times and exchanged a few letters since his graduation. She didn't know much about parenting, but it seemed like a guardian needed a bit more than that. Besides, she would hate being a burden to him. From what she'd heard from him, he was still getting on his own two feet after Hogwarts. He was a kind boy, but she was still even getting used to having a brother. Having him be her guardian would be incredibly unsettling.

The feeling of uncertainty and doubt was one that threatened to suffocate her, but she had hope that someone would be able to help her out. There were only a few people in the world Odette trusted, but over the past year she had to admit Maria Madison had been added to that list. The school counsellor had been helping her with many things, and it had really been nice to talk to someone about her problems and hear an outsider's perspective. Especially one as kind and understanding as Maria. But now that this had happened, all her previous problems seemed small. Odette clung to the hope that Maria would know what she should do. That she would help her out somehow, even if it was only by telling her what was going to happen if they couldn't find any family members to take her in. She had taken the letter to the appointment, though she didn't think Maria would need to read it as she assumed the woman knew about the situation. But maybe it would help. Strangely, even though she hadn't really dared to read it properly, she still clung to it as a solid thing in this daze of sadness and fear. She had carried it with her since the day she had heard the news, even though she hadn't opened it since first getting it. Odette now held the letter in her hand as she knocked on Maria's door. As she heard the woman start to open it from the other side, she felt a spark of hope for the first time in days.

 

[Maria Madison]

Before new appointments, Maria always made sure to have a check through a student's file and get a feel for where their life was at, and what their pressing problems were. After seeing someone for a long time though, she often found it helpful to return to those first notes and get an idea for the patient's progress, and anything that still needed addressing. Maria was reading over the first few pages of notes in Odette's file in preparation for their appointment when she heard a knock on her door, looking up quickly. Maria had been incredibly impressed with Odette's emotional progress over the last year, and she looked forward to seeing the kind of woman she would grow into, with the levels of health she had been growing into.

The smile died on Maria's lips the second she opened the door. The pain in Odette's expression was a gut punch, and she knew at once that something very wrong had happened. Odette's recent breakup had already rocked her, but this looked worse, so much worse. "Come in..." Maria said quickly, welcome Odette into her office and closing the door behind the girl. Whatever had happened, Maria had no doubts that Odette would want to discuss it in privacy. Taking the letter Odette held out, a horrible weight of understanding crystallised in Maria's stomach as she read what had happened. Although Maria would be first in line to argue that Odette's mother was a negative influence in her life, losing a parent, even with such a complex relationship, was something no child should go through so young, something Maria knew from experience. "Oh, Odette..." She said softly, guiding the girl to a seat carefully and flicking her wand to get the kettle in the corner of her office boiling. "I'm so sorry. I'm here. Anything you need to talk about, whatever you need to say, you can say it here." She said gently, offering Odette the box of tissues that always sat on her table. "I'm here for you."

 

[Odette Madison]

As soon as the door opened, Odette knew Maria hadn’t heard yet. She suddenly felt very naive, thinking that the woman would somehow know about her situation. Why? Because she always seemed to know what to do? That didn’t mean she knew things before someone told her. Odette was glad for the letter, so she didn’t have to say the words herself. She took her usual seat, trying her best not to watch as the woman read her letter. Dread gathered in her stomach as she waited for her to be done, and when she was finished, the pity in her voice made a flash of annoyance appear unexpectedly. “I just need to know what will happen now.” She said, her voice lacking emotion. “I don’t.. I don’t need tissues.” She pushed them away, shaking her head. “I’m not going to cry- I haven’t… not much.” Admitting that made her nervous, but she needed to hear what Maria had to say about her lack of tears so far. When she had heard the news she had sobbed, but since then her eyes had remained dry. Surely, that wasn’t right. Maybe Maria could tell her what was wrong, though maybe it just meant Odette wasn’t a good daughter. She and her mother had their problems, especially the last few years, but that didn’t mean she shouldn’t cry. It was still her mother. Slumping down in the chair, Odette crossed her arms protectively in front of her, not looking at Maria and trying her best to scowl. “Do you know what will happen when they can’t find my dad?” She asked, her voice coming out soft and unsure despite her angry posture.

 

[Maria Madison]

As Maria listened to Odette, her heart broke all over again. She was very familiar with different ways people processed grief, and Odette's experiences with her mother and difficult relationship with her own emotions were clear in her focus on the practical. She didn't know when Odette would be ready to process how she felt about this, but for the moment Maria knew her most important job was to make sure Odette got to a place where she would be supported when she was ready. "Well, if you don't have any other living relatives on your official records, you'll be moved into the foster system." She said gently, lowering the tissue box back to the table. "Given your age, it's likely that you'll be in foster care until you reach adulthood." In her time as a counselor Maria had seen both the best and the worst of the foster system, and while she had seen many happy homes with genuinely caring people, there was no guarantee that Odette would wind up in one of those, and even if she did, there was no guarantee that she would be able to settle enough to deal with her emotions properly. Maria stayed silent for a long moment, weighing the circumstances, and when she spoke again, she chose her words carefully, already planning ahead for what she would need to do next. "If you wouldn't feel comfortable living with strangers... there's space at my house." She said carefully. "I would be willing to apply to foster you. But only if that's what you want." Maria added quickly, wanting to make that point clear. "I know that you might feel... powerless right now, but I'm here to make sure that your wishes are respected. Whatever you want to do, wherever you want to go, I'll do everything I can to advocate for you, and make sure your wishes are taken into account. But if it is what you want... my home is an option."

 

[Odette Madison]

Odette was glad when Maria put the tissue box away and seemed to get to business. She could take more from Maria than anyone else, but she still hated the idea of being pitied. She still didn’t quite look at the woman as she started to explain, but it was clear from her body language that she was listening closely. The girl visibly winced at the term ‘foster care’, but somehow the idea that she would only be in any sort of care until adulthood scared her even more. She was already sixteen, that was only a year away. What was she going to do after that? Surely some random foster parent wouldn’t want to keep supporting her when she graduated. She had no skills, would probably mess up her OWLs and unless she managed to get on a professional team, who knew what she was even going to do? Panic started to seize her, and Odette’s grip tightened on the armrests of her chair. She wanted to speak her mind and tell Maria about her worries, but the words were all jumbled up in her mind. It took her a moment to realize Maria was speaking again, and another moment to realize what she was saying. Odette blinked at her, not comprehending for a moment. “Your house?” She asked quietly, trying to understand what she was saying. Her mind flashed back to the time she had seen Maria with her children at the beach. It had been clear from a glance the children weren’t biological siblings, and she had realized they had probably been adopted or something. But to think she would offer fostering her like that was… too strange. It definitely seemed too good to be true. Guiltily, Odette recalled how she had felt a sense of longing while looking at Maria's family. She knew it made no logical sense, but it made her feel like she was somehow more responsible for what happened to her mother. As if her wishes for a family like that had caused her to die. Odette quietly worked through some of her feelings, telling herself sternly that that made no sense. It didn’t ease the guilt completely, but it made her able to react to Maria’s words. “Are you sure about that?” She asked quietly. “I… I wouldn’t take up much space, I mean, I’ll be an adult next year so it’s not for very long either.” She decided not to tell Maria she didn't think she would be ready to be on her own as an adult. It would be bad to say anything that would make the woman change her mind about this. Even though she had mixed feelings about this, she knew that it was better than having to live with strangers, so she would try to fight for it. Finally, she looked at Maria, her gaze imploring. “And I can stay at school during the holidays, you wouldn't have to do much.” She knew she hadn’t actually said she wanted to live with Maria, but admitting that in so many words felt wrong. Hopefully, the woman would understand her meaning. Odette just hoped the offer had been genuine, and not one out of a sense of duty or guilt. Or worse, just something to say to calm her down. Odette trusted Maria, but she also knew that sometimes people said things they didn't mean to get a result.

 

[Maria Madison]

Maria didn't know how to expect Odette to react to her offer, but she would have been wracked with guilt if she didn't at least make it. Entering the foster system at such a difficult time would be hard and painful for Odette, and Maria wanted to minimise the upheaval and uncertainty in her future as much as possible. When Odette questioned her offer she nodded slowly, trying to gauge how the girl was feeling. "If you would like that. If you would rather stay somewhere else, I'll do everything I can to make sure it's somewhere good." She stayed silent after that, letting Odette consider her options. It was a difficult decision, Maria knew that much, and though she had been through similar conversations three times now, waiting to hear the answer never got any less nerve-wracking. She sat still though and let Odette think, listening carefully when the girl finally spoke again. "I'm sure." Maria said gently. "We have plenty of space. And you're welcome to stay as long as you like. Including holidays, and after you graduate. I don't want you to think of yourself as imposing in any way. Our home has always been open to whoever needs it."

 

[Odette Madison]

Odette’s heart was pounding in her chest as the possibility of living with Maria was put in front of her. She wondered if she had reacted the right way to the offer. She hadn’t wanted to seem too eager, but as she sat here and thought about it she realized that she wanted this very much. Someone she trusted was infinitely better as a choice than a stranger. Odette shook her head slightly when the woman told her she would ensure it was somewhere good. How was she going to do that? She visibly sagged in relief when Maria assured her she was certain about her decision. Odette looked down, considering her offer. “I would like that.” She said softly, feeling a sense of calm come over her as she admitted it. “I’m not sure how it all works. Can I really just… live with you for a while?” It sounded too good to be true. “I… didn’t read the letter completely.” She admitted with a shrug. “I don’t know how any of this really works.”

 

[Maria Madison]

Seeing the relief in Odette's reaction relieved Maria, and she smiled, listening to the girl. She would certainly have to do some rearranging to make space for Odette, but Maria had always felt a strong drive to do everything she could for children who were going through difficult times, and she hoped she would be able to help get Odette through this difficult time. "Well, I'll need to apply, but I've fostered before and I have a good record, that shouldn't be any issue. The Ministry may try to see if they can find any family members appropriate to look after you, but I know what your family situation is like. Assuming everything goes through, you'll be welcome in my home for as long as you like. You don't have anything to worry about for the future." With the practical future squared away, Maria knew Odette would have more to discuss and she was ready to talk the girl through everything she was going through as their session went on, though she knew that soothing Odette's complicated emotions about her mother was going to be a long ongoing process. Today, at least, she would do everything she could for Odette, and begin planning for the future.

 

[Odette Madison]

While Maria’s words did something to reassure Odette, she was still wary. The woman told her they ministry would be looking into finding her family, which Odette had gathered from the bits and pieces of the letter she had read. But to know that Maria would be willing to let her into her home if they didn’t find anyone was a relief. It just seemed almost too good to be true. Odette was quiet for a long moment, Maria’s last words echoing in her mind. Nothing to worry about, that surely wasn’t true. Odette had to start to be independent soon, she couldn’t rely on the kindness of someone who was essentially a stranger for long, her pride wouldn’t allow it. Maria was one of the people she trusted the most, but that was in the role of a counsellor. She wouldn’t allow herself to get attached in any other way. This was just… a practical solution until she could leave. “Thank you.” She said softly. “I hope… that works out. I promise I won’t be any trouble.” She felt the urge to repeat the last part, just in case Maria was still hesitating a little deep down.