Summer in California.....

[Lily Drage]

Summer in California was always an amazing time. Josh was such a great host, and, well, being able to spend time with Blake like this was just wonderful. This was definitely better than staying at the castle, something that Lily had been used to doing before she began to date Blake just over 4 years ago. Being able to spend the day like they had today was a luxury. Josh was away, saying he had some business to take care of. Lily and Blake knew that Josh's 'business' was rather shady but knew better than to question him when he used that excuse. They had spent most of the day on the beach outside the apartment playing in the sand. There were a few other teens in the area they enjoyed hanging out with, swimming and playing volleyball and just being 'normal' for a bit. Having come in when the others went home, they ate dinner before settling in to watch a movie together on the sofa.

One of Lily's favorite things to do was snuggle up next to Blake. They had pulled out an old movie of Josh's called Little Miss Sunshine to watch. The movie was great, touching and yet funny. The only problem Lily had was with the brother in the movie, who oddly took a vow of silence until he was able to join the Air Force and fly fighter jets. The kid playing him reminded her of someone and it was driving her nuts! She just could not pick out who it was that he reminded her of until suddenly it dawned on her. Ford. The kid looked strikingly like Ford. She had been doing so well not to think of him since she had been there, but suddenly, there he was. Trying not to freak out and alert Blake to her discomfort, she decided that she needed to distract herself from the movie. Sitting up a bit straighter, she turned her head towards Blake, kissing him on his cheek to get his attention.

 

[Blake Zepline]

Blake had been so consumed in the movie Little Miss Sunshine, that Lily's kiss caught him completely off guard. Turning from Josh's flat screen to glance at Lily, Blake beamed. "I'm sorry... Is my presence distracting you from properly watching the movie?" he joked, chuckling. "I could hide behind the sofa, if you want?"
Placing his hand under Lily's chin, Blake inched a little closer to her. "Or... We could just do something else..?" Without waiting for an answer, Blake slowly let his lips touch Lily's.

 

[Lily Drage]

Lily smiled as Blake turned his attention to her. She was really over watching this movie and wanted to do anything else at this point. Kissing seemed to be at the top of her list. When Blake suggested doing 'something else' she felt a familiar warmth flow through her body. Pulling apart from Blake just a bit, she spoke just above a whisper. "I think something else sounds like a plan." Moving quickly, she turned and slid herself onto Blake's lap, pulling his face towards hers gently and placing her lips on his. Her left hand rested on his right cheek and her right arm snaked around his shoulders.

 

[Blake Zepline]

Blake enjoyed how Lily teased him, sitting across his lap as innocently as she did but with evident intentions far from it. Leaning forward to deepen the kiss, Blake couldn't help but tease her back letting his hand slide to the small of her back while letting the other rest on her thigh. At the touch of his skin on hers, his breath caught in his chest as he felt himself react. Even though it was becoming a common natural reaction of his to Lily, he still hadn't quite gotten used to it.

 

[Lily Drage]

Lily leaned into the kiss, deepening it and entangling her hand into his dark hair. The thoughts that she was striving to overcome were but a distant memory now, her focus solely on the boy- no man, whose arms were around her. His hand seemed to burn on her thigh as it rested just below the hem of her shorts. She pressed her body closer to his, not really thinking much about where things would go from here, but simply enjoying the moment that was at hand.

 

[Blake Zepline]

Blake's self-control was already dwindling, and though his sanity urged strongly against it, he lifted Lily's slight figure, his hefty arms laced with rippling toned muscles, and placed her beside him on the sofa. Slowly, Blake leaned closer over Lily, consciously keeping himself fully aware of her reaction and trying not to rush her anymore than he already was. He wanted her to feel comfortable, and especially didn't want her to feel any pressure from him to comply. Holding the back of her head with his hand, fingers entwined in her hair, Blake kissed her again, this time with more than he could control intensity.

 

[Lily Drage]

Lily felt her stomach twist in nervous anticipation as Blake moved her away just a bit, then pulled her even closer to his manly body and took their kissing to another level. It was nervousness in a good way, and she as not quite sure how much further she wanted to take things. They had reached the point in the movie where the boy that looked like Ford started yelling a massive amount of obscenities. The thought of Ford invaded her mind again, as well as the supreme intensity of their short time in the library. The mere thought of Ford made her feel guilty again, and spurred her forward. She responded to Blake where normally she would have stopped things from going too much further. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she pulled him as close as possible to her, returning his kiss at a level that she had not used before...

 

[Blake Zepline]

As Lily pulled him closer, Blake's insides warmed and began melting him to the core. But it was her kiss that caught him completely off-guard having never before experienced it like this. As an inevitable result, his self-control slipped. In a moment too fast, Blake's lips had moved from Lily's mouth, all the way down to her neck, gently tracing an invisible pattern. It was out of respect that he dared not go any farther than that, but still, the thought lingered. Brushing his lips gently against her soft skin, Blake inhaled deeply allowing the scent of her to burn in his nose. Blake had wanted Lily this way for so long that he couldn't even remember a time when he hadn't. But it was never, even now, a mere craving of lust, but a simple tribute of his love.
In the five years they had been together, Blake had never rushed Lily into doing anything more than she was comfortable doing. But for some reason, lost in the moment with the heat from her body so close to his, Blake was seared with a hunger that had never existed before now. But in turn, he was so sure that she wanted him this way too.

 

[Lily Drage]

As Blake's lips trailed down her throat, Lily couldn't help but gasp for air. The sharp intake was not out of shock, well, kind of since this was a new sensation for her, but more from the pleasure that it brought her. They had made out intensely in the past, but never like this. Never was the thought of something else invading her mind, pushing out all other thoughts. At this moment, all that existed was Blake. There was a new urgency that had not been there before, and it was an amazing feeling. The love she felt for Blake was all consuming at that moment. She wanted nothing more than to be as close to him as physically possible.

Without thinking about what she was doing, Lily started to squirm a bit on the sofa. Her arms tightened her hold on Blake and her breathing quickened. Her heart was pounding from the excitement of it all. They had always stopped before getting to this point. Blake was so respectful of her and of not wanting for her to do things that she was not ready for. If Lily could reason at this point, she would realize she was not ready for what was certain to happen tonight. Ready or not, she was so into what was happening that she had no desire to stop. Pulling gently on Blake's face, she pulled his lips back to hers, entangling her left hand in his hair and her right trailing down his spine.

 

[Blake Zepline]

Lily's gasp made Blake feel a little more at ease with the current situation. But it also drove his sanity from him, leaving the hunger to be closer to Lily screaming in his head. And how he wanted to love her that way. To show her how much he loved her. But before he could do anything else, Blake stopped himself, moving as quickly away from her now as he had only moments before moved closer.
Turning his face away from her, Blake held his head in his hands. "Lily..." he began, his voice hoarse with pain, longing and doubt. "I can't do this." In truth, it was not that he could not, but simply that he would not. They were a pair of teenagers, experimenting with things far beyond their maturity level on the sofa in his father's lounge. What they were doing felt demeaning to Blake, and this was not how he wanted his first time and, especially, Lily's to be. But more importantly, he would not do this to her. Not when he wasn't even sure if she knew whether she was ready to make that commitment to him; to give him the one thing that she valued most.
Blake shook his head. No, he wouldn't take take that from her. He loved Lily that much where saying no was easy when it was in her best interest.

 

[Lily Drage]

Blake suddenly pulled himself away from Lily, and she was left panting and wanting for some reason to cry. Had she done something wrong? Did she say something? As her senses started to come back to her, she realized that Blake was just being responsible. It felt odd. Usually she was the one stopping things from going too far. As she sat up, she started to think. Is this what I want? Do I really want to do this? Tonight? They were young, merely teenagers, and completely not ready for the consequences of their actions if things were to not go right. As she moved across the sofa, she did not seem to care. She knew that Blake was ready, had been ready for a while now, to do this. He always held back because she was not there yet. Now, as he pulled away from her she realized she wanted this as much as he did.

She moved across the sofa and wrapped her arms around Blake, resting her cheek on the back of his shoulder. "Blake," she whispered softly, her voice conveying the longing she was feeling, "I- I don't want to stop." She closed her eyes, not sure how he would react, but she decided that at this point, she would leave the next move up to him.

 

[Blake Zepline]

Blake replayed Lily's words over and over in his head. He couldn't quite believe that she was saying what he thought she was saying. But all the same her words seemed to inflate his chest with warmth despite his confusion and disbelief. But the more he contemplated, the more he believed that she really did want this with him.
Still, Blake wanted to be certain. Turning to face his girlfriend again, Blake took her hands into his. "Are you sure this is what you want?" Blake asked Lily very carefully. "I don't want you to feel like you have to do this for me... You don't owe me anything. Least of all this." Pausing, Blake searched Lily's eyes for a trace of some self doubt. For anything that would tell him that this was not what she wanted. "I would wait forever for you. You know I would..."

 

[Lily Drage]

Lily felt more in love with Blake than ever before. He was looking out for her even now when others would have simply jumped at the opportunity. "I know you would wait. That means the world to me." Taking her hands and placing them on his face, she continued. "I want to do this....with you....tonight." Moving forward, she placed her lips on his, kissing him fully. She truly thought she was ready for this step, though deep down she knew that she wasn't. It was a way for her to prove to herself that she loved Blake and only Blake. To prove to herself that Ford meant nothing. Was Ford really nothing? Or was there something there -- always been there since that fateful Yule Ball three years ago -- that Lily just was not willing to admit to.

She deepened the kiss just a bit, then pulled her lips back so they were barely apart. "I am ready for this," she whispered, opening her eyes and looking into the deep green eyes before her. Her right hand stroked his face gently before snaking around to his neck and pulling him forward into another kiss.

 

[Blake Zepline]

Blake inhaled deeply as Lily's kiss unleashed his hunger for her, again. He was ready for this, and he trusted now that Lily was too. And as their lips met for the second time, Blake was suddenly on fire. He could feel his blood racing, causing a rise in him. Lily was all that filled his mind, and though he had seen her half naked before, the thought of seeing her like that again made him more nervous than usual.
This is what she wants, Blake told himself, trying to ease the nerve racking sensation he was feeling that maybe he secretly didn't. But stopping his train of thought, of doubt, Blake scooped Lily's slight figure into his arms, ans carried her from the lounge, all the way to his bedroom. He hated to wait to be with her, but the more pressing inconvenience was the risk of Josh catching them on the sofa, which was agreeably much worse. As he crossed the threshold to his bedroom with Lily still secure in his arms, Blake kicked back his foot sending the door banging shut. Within seconds, he had set Lily down on his bed while managing to never let his skin part from hers. Smiling nervously, Blake felt heat redden his face, and though he quite preferred the lights on, but for once he actually enjoyed the darkness and all that it could hide.

---

A while later...

Blake couldn’t sleep. But who could blame him? What with the beauty lying in his bed, completely bare and less than a few inches away from him? He had to constantly pinch himself for fear of dreaming. Lily was so peaceful in her sleep and Blake couldn’t help but admire how beautiful she was; tracing the lines of her jaw softly with his finger. The one thing that held him breathless was the fact that she was his, and he was hers. They were a perfect match.
Blake had wanted Lily this way for a long time, only he had always been so careful with her; stopping himself and occasionally her when he could feel things going a bit too far. He had promised himself that it would be by her choice and hers alone when they would be ready for that big step, not his. And when Lily had finally gone the full way, he had been unsure of how to respond. But in the full heat of the moment, and after her assurance that she was ready, Blake could resist no longer. For him it was the right moment, and she was definitely the right girl. With the amount of love he had for Lily, it really was more than perfect.
Lily’s hair was sprawled over her pillow so delicately, her pale shoulders almost glistening under the moonlight that had seeped in through the window. To say that he loved her was an understatement. Love felt like such a small word in comparison. Tonight had been so perfect that he had been unwilling to fall asleep when she was by his side. But he could no longer keep his eyes open, finally allowing himself the peace he needed with the image of Lily still imprinted in his mind…

 

[Lily Drage]

Lily slipped out of bed quietly and made her way back to her room. Well, Josh had always said she could treat it like her own room. She was so grateful to Josh for making her feel like a part of the family. It was odd to think about, but she always kinda thought Blake and she would end up married and Josh really would be her family. Now she was not so sure anymore. It wasn’t that she didn’t love Blake, but that she also had feelings for another, for Ford.
Slipping into a pair of jeans and a hoodie, Lily made her way out onto the balcony quietly so she did not wake anyone. Moving quickly down the stairs, she walked to her favorite spot on the beach to sit and think. She had been spending a lot of time there this summer and after what had transpired last night, she really needed to think things over. Settling down onto the sand, she pulled her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Resting her chin on her legs, Lily looked out over the Pacific Ocean, watching the waves crash on the shore. Unwillingly, tears slowly began to form and flow down her cheeks.
Lily should be happy. Last night was amazing. She and Blake had moved their relationship to a new level. She had never been with anyone the way she was with Blake, and he had never been with anyone that way either. They had been close a few times before, but had always stopped because that was a step they just were not ready for. Lily made the final decision last night as to whether they went there or not. Thinking at the time that she was ready, she agreed. Blake was wonderful. He never pressured her to do anything she didn’t want to. If she had said no, he would have understood and not pressed the issue further.
As she sat there on the beach, she realized that she really was not ready for that step of their relationship. Lily loved Blake dearly, and the events of the previous night were unbelievably amazing, but the mere fact that after the night with Blake she still was thinking of Ford made her pause. What had transpired with him in the library, and again at the Three Broomsticks after the visit to the Borely Mansion, made her question her devotion to Blake. If she really, truly was in love with Blake, would she have fallen so easily for what the older Slytherin did? Her feelings for Ford were truly a love/hate situation. She hated his arrogance and his attitude towards her, but yet she felt she could allow herself to love him for those exact same reasons.
Lily wiped the tears from her cheeks. She needed to figure out a way to discuss all of this with Blake without him thinking she didn’t love him. She did. He made her heart fly like no other could. How to talk about all of this without him taking the blame on himself? She knew Blake too well. His first instinct would be to take her problems on his shoulders. This was all her issue and Lily needed to figure out how to get through this before it caused further problems for her and Blake.
Lily stayed on the beach that morning for close to an hour. When she finally felt ready to face Blake again, she headed back to the house. Everyone was still asleep; well she assumed that Josh was still sleeping. It was quite possible that he was not even home. Moving to her room, she quickly disrobed again. She crossed the hallway silently and climbed back into Blake’s bed. She might not know just what it was that she wanted overall, but she knew at that moment she wanted to be in his arms. She just hoped that it would be enough to drive the thoughts invading her mind out.