Sitting Silently

[Makenna Morgan]

Makenna hated the Great hall with the upmost passion. There was just so many people all way too close for her liking. So many people, so much food, and so much noise. The combination made Makenna sick to her stomach. Yet as she wondered down to the kitchens minutes before, it was full of three to four people. Now anyone would think that this young slytherin would choose the four people over the huge great hall, but Makenna knew that in a small group people would talk to her yet in a large group she would easily blend in.

Her stomach growling softly, Makenna walked into the great hall her Slytherin uniform comfortably on as well as her loose black leggings and long sleeved black shirt under. Carefully she walked over to the table, making sure to go towards the area were few people were, sitting by herself as always.

Her brown hair fell covering one of her eyes, her legs crossed carefully under the table as her brown eyes frantically looked around making sure that no one was looking at her or even thinking about coming over to sit by her. Makenna felt comfortable with very few people and meeting new people freaked her out so much more than anyone could understand.

Slowly Makenna placed a few items onto her plate starting with a nice baked potato and then some mash potatoes. With her thin pale hand, Makenna held the fork dipping it into the mash potatoes and taking one bite after another. Concentrating on the environment around her.

 

[Charlie Linus]

Charlie entered the great hall with a scowl. The place was noisy and crowded. Charlie liked the quiet and being alone. It suited him much better. However, the house elves creeped him out, so he wasnt sure he wanted to go to the kitchens when their was lots of them down there all at once. He supressed a shudder at the thought.

Making his way to the Slytherin table, his eyes scanned over the other tables, everyone was laughing and eating with friends. The Slytherin table seemed alot more reserved. That was exactly the way Charlie liked it. He noticed a part of the table with less people on it and took a seat, looking up once to see a girl opposite him, looking like she wanted to be here just as much as Charlie did.

He grabbed a plate and stared at it, not sure he was hungry anymore. The noises and cheerful students putting him off food. "I dont know why I even bother eating." He mumbled, loud enough that the girl opposite him probably heard him, but to be honest he really didnt care. Everyone thought he was weird anyways. Being a 'muggleborn' in Slytherin.

 

[Makenna Morgan]

The noise of the great hall were really making this Slytherin nervous. The cheerful laughter that only confused this girl who seemed never to be happy; the loud talking about things that Makenna would probably never understand about the teenage and child society. Though as she heard a sound coming closer to her, Makenna tensed up. Her brown eyes focused up at the boy who had sat across from her. Be careful watch yourself and don't make eye contact The voice in Makenna's head told this young girl who was more afraid of the boy sitting across from her than he probably understood.

Looking back down on her plate she tried to concentrate on the mash pototoes that were scooped onto her fork. Yet she didn't yet dare put them in her mouth. Her thoughts and her senses were more focused on the closeness of the boy even if he was indeed all the way across the table from this brown eyed child.

When the boy spoke, Makenna looked up not daring to make eye contact but at least enough of a gaze to show she had indeed heard his statement, a statement that seemed to confused Makenna. I don't even know why I bother eating Her thoughts repeated hoping to comprehand the statement. Sure Makenna didn't know too much about the lives of those on what she considered the 'outside world' but she did know the basics and eating was without a doubt a basic.

Say something just don't question The voice in her mind commanded. Rule number two of her father's many rules was never to question. This Makenna broke many times though at this moment she was going to try anything to not break her simple rule. Her eyes looked up once more as the fork in her hand was placed down onto the plate. "You eat because it is needed to survive life" Makenna said her voice soft almost a whisper. Even talking to a person nonetheless a boy was a huge step for Makenna. If the boy expected her voice to be full and normal, he was hopelessly going to be disappointed.

 

[Charlie Linus]

Charlie placed an assortment of things on his plate, just so it was there. He planned on pushing them around a bit and perhaps eating a little. It was- needed to survive life. His thoughts were finished for him as he caught the last of what the girl across from him had said. He looked up, noticing she hadnt made eye contact and her voice was very soft. Charlie furrowed his brow slightly looking down at his plate. "True." He mumbled, picking up a fork and poking his mashed potatoes.

After a long awkward silence, Charlie felt as though he needed to say something, he was just getting used to being around people and making friends, so he believed that was the right thing to do at a time like this. Clearing his throat a little he said. "I hate this hall though. I dont see the point in eating here if the noise puts me off food anyway." He admitted softly. Sure it wasnt a great bit of conversation, but it would do. The girl confused him a little, but Charlie wouldnt say it. He had no right to judge anyone, when he himself felt the weight of judgement on his shoulders so often.

 

[Makenna Morgan]

Makenna felt the silence fill the gap between what some would consider a conversation between herself and the boy whom she did not know. Was he in Slytherin? If not why was he at the Slytherin table? What was his name? Why did he not know that eating was part of everyday life? Was he thick or just tired or neither of the two? All these questions swam in the mind of this young slytherin as she stared down at her mash potatoes her brown eyes full of no curiousity, no happiness, no sadness, no emotion at all. Rarely did her brown eyes fill with any emotion and almost never did they fill with cheerfullness.

Though her eyes did wonder. Once more they wondered up to look at the boy who seemed to be picking at the assortment of foods on his plate. Without much time passing, Makenna picked up her fork once more taking a small scoop of mash pototoes onto the metal. Her shoulders still tense and her posture rather hunched, she carefully put the small amount of potatoes in her mouth not looking up at the boy until she was down with every little mosal that was put into her mouth.

"I dislike the great hall as well" Makenna said softly in response to the boy's statement. That was how a conversation went wasn't it. Statement, reply, statement, reply. Simple enough in thought, but to actually convey such a thing was harder than normal people expected, harder than Makenna expected. "I wanted to eat in the kitchen" She said making her statement after the reply she had just created. "But there were too many people there. Someone would stare or talk to me" She added her voice still barely above a whisper. The silent sound of the fork pushing the mash potatoes around on the plate was almost as loud as this young girl.

"Why aren't you in the kitchen?" She asked the voice in her head yelling at her the moment after the words left her mouth. Question Question. You asked a question. Rule Breaker Rule Breaker. Thank god your father wasn't here to hear that The voice screamed making Makenna even more tense her spine getting a small shiver with the thought of what her father would say to such a question that 'made Makenna's intellegence be put into question.'

 

[Charlie Linus]

Charlie too scooped a small amount of potatoes in his mouth, but he could barely taste them. He's never been a big eater anyway, at home he wasnt given much food, just as much as was neccessary. He would sometimes sneak food, because all the good stuff, his parents would hide. But when they went out, it was too easy to find when you had so much time to do so. No friends, no responsibilities. Heck, his parents didnt even care that he didnt do school work. They just didnt care.

Charlie swallowed down such thoughts as he swallowed the potatoes. He looked up when the girl spoke, straining to hear her quiet voice. He would admit, social interaction was good, but it was new and different. Charlie disliked change, but he had gone through it his whole life. He nodded gently at the girl's words. They made sense, Charlie had only ever been down there once, in the middle of the night and still met someone there.

Her question Charlie wasnt sure he wanted to answer. Would this girl think he was stupid? He hadnt confessed his irrational fear of house elves to anyone, because basically everyone was so used to them, that he would seem like more of an outcast finding something that was like a cat or a dog to wizards scary. But this girl was quiet and reserved, he didnt think her reaction would be too huge. "The house elves creep me out." He said softly, lowering his voice to almost her level. His face turned into a scowl thinking about the weird creatures. He hadnt admitted he was afraid he couldnt do that, he just needed to play it cool.

 

[Makenna Morgan]

Makenna slowly scooped up a bit more mash pototoes into her mouth tasting the butter in them. Rarely had Makenna ever eaten anything that had butter in it. Not because she was worried about her weight. How stupid she found that girl's her age were on diets and cared about how they looked. This Slytherin rarely ate anything with butter for food items with butter required cooking and she didn't cook. Neither did her father or grandfather. Well they didn't cook for her. Which explained this girl's small figure, yet no one realized it under the amount of layers Makenna threw on. Anything to cover up the skin that she found awful to show an ounce of it.

Taking another bite, Makenna's shoulders dare not relax no matter how much this stiff posture was hurting them. It was not worth letting her gaurd down, not in front of a boy, no in front of anyone. It was her own life that she had to watch out for, her own back and no one elses. This was keeping her back safe, so to say.

The boy's words seemed a little strange to Makenna. The world house elf was not one that she had heard many times since her arrival. No this young girl had not even seen a house elf up close. Are they something to be afraid of? Makenna wondered as her mind flashed to the book that was about house elves that she had read in the library. A picture was showing the image of such a creature. "They have big eyes" She said simply and softly not knowing what to say about the house elves for she did not know much about them. Fears she could talk about, if only that wasn't against her rules. Rule number one actually, the rule Makenna dare not break.

It's your turn to have a statement the voice in Makenna's mind reminded her. Not a thing came to mind. Introduce yourself God don't be so stupid The voice yelled. Makenna could only agree that she was rather awful at this almost dumb in this area of life, the social area. "My name's Makenna" She said hating how random that sounded. How come she couldn't master the simple conversation? "Makenna Morgan First Year Slytherin" She continued needed to fill the small space in which her statement was supposed to go. Did an introduction count as a statement? For this case it was going to have to.

 

[Charlie Linus]

Charlie began pushing his food around again. Waiting for the girl to reply to his statement. That is if she made one. Charlie wouldnt be surprised if she just got up and walked out of the Great Hall. Charlie was aware the conversation was slow, but Charlie couldnt complain, it was social interaction. The only thing stopping him from going insane in this place.

Finally there was a reply. 'They have big eyes'. Charlie nodded and held back a shudder. Charlie wasnt afraid of much, just house elves really. "They're just generally weird looking." Charlie stated in return. He then heard the girl say her name was Makenna. Charlie half smiled, his lips twitching up slightly. "Im Charlie, same year and house as you." He said. He realised he was meeting alot of first year Slytherin's but he had never seen them around. Most likely because he kept to himself the majority of the time. He didnt really have a purpose for noticing people.

 

[Makenna Morgan]

Makenna put down her fork not really hungry anymore. It wasn't just the crowds of people or the conversation she was trying to hold or even the combination of both. It was simply too much effort trying to think of normal things to say and trying to eat at the same time. Stopping the conversation was not going to be the choice that Makenna made so instead she stopped eating. Her brown eyes glanced up at the boy for a moment as she reached over slowly making sure not to knock anything over or even make contact with anyone near her. This Slytherin took hold of the pumpkin juice and poured herself a little bit before placing it in front of her not wanting to reach over once more, risking everything.

Taking a sip of pumpkin juice her mind filtered the conversation picking out the bits and pieces of it. Were all conversations to everyone as difficult, as defined. Taylor, Makenna's one and seemed to be only friend, didn't seem to think about what she said or how she smiled. This is what amazed Makenna about that young Gryffindor. This boy in the other hand was different.

"Nice to meet you Charlie" Makenna said finding the name rather common. Her mind flashed back to the cartoon of Snoopy where the second main character was Charlie Brown. Looking up at the boy she noted the differences in her mind from the character to the real person in front of her. Looking back down at the goblet in her hands, Makenna pushed the image of the character out of her mind. It served no use in this conversation, really it served no use at all.

He is in your year and House. The voice reminded Makenna almost as if her memory was trying hard to register the name. Never had she before had to remember names. Never before here had she met many people. Now that part of Makenna's mind was trying it's hardest to get used to facial and name reconizition.

Taking another sip of her pumpkin juice, Makenna's words seemed to fail her. It was her turn to make a statement and nothing came to mind. You are screwing up this conversation. Of course you can't even last one simple conversation. Such a failure The voice rang in her mind as she tried her hardest to tune it out, it never worked. Opening her mouth she hoped words would just spill out, they didn't.

Closing her mouth right away, Makenna turned her focus to her cup hoping that this boy would know what to say, if not he would just walk away from this situation. Actually Makenna was surprised that he stayed this long.

 

[Charlie Linus]

Charlie nodded again when Makenna said it was nice to meet him. "Likewise." He said, although the conversation was so awkward he couldnt be sure his reply was sincere. Charlie kept his eyes on his plate as he continued pushing around his food. As the silence stretched out, Charlie took another spoonful of potatoes and placed it in his mouth. Eating seemed to be the only thing to do for the duration of the silence.

His mind played around for some form of conversation. What had he spoken about with other people? Or maybe he should just let the silence continue and say nothing more? Did he even want that? Why had he begun talking to the girl in the first place? What would he gain from this? His mind asked him so many questions, but he found himself talking regardless, his instincts pushing him to say something. "How are you liking classes and stuff so far?" He asked casually, taking another mouthful of food as a distraction.

 

[Makenna Morgan]

Makenna held the goblet in her hands, her hands luckily not shaking. Sometimes her hands randomly shook, mostly in crowded places. At this moment, even as Makenna was surrounded by people and noise, her hands remained stable. Something that she made a mental note about, but went no more into the thought process of this. The silence for her was not awkward but comforting. Silence was something Makenna loved in the past and still to this day found comfort in. Silence meant safety where loudness meant that people were around, enemies or dangers.

Her brown eyes remained on the goblet as if this simple cup was jeweled and wonderful. It was nothing really except a simple probably fake gold goblet in which was full of a sugary sustance, pumpkin juice in this situation. The comforting silence was soon filled with the need to think and to speak.

This Slytherin carefully brought her eyes up to the boy named Charlie. "Classes are crowded" Makenna said stating the obvious. How she hated to be in that room full of people that were always looking at her or at least Makenna thought they were. "Though I like the educational information learned." She continued knowing she sounded like an intellegent person, maybe even a Ravenclaw. Not that to give that impression at all. "Potions is my favorite so far" She continued finding the words for once flowing out, once in a life time chance probably.

"How are you finding classes?" This young girl wondered her eyes being brought down towards her plate, not wanting to look at the boy too long. It was more than odd for Makenna to hold this conversation for this long nonetheless with one of a male gender.

 

[Charlie Linus]

Charlie listened to Makenna explain what she thought of classes. Charlie had to agree about the crowded part, but even he didnt like what they were learning. He answered her question. "I dont really think much of classes at all. Or this school." He confessed, for probably only the second time. He remembered getting along well with Lucy, because she had the same views as him. He wasnt sure when or if he would ever get used to being a wizard. Overall he didnt want to.

Charlie looked around the Great Hall and noticed a few people leaving. Thankfully. He looked back down at his plate and put his fork down. He wasnt really hungry. He looked back up at the girl and thought about things he could say. He didnt think he had much more to add to the conversation. If you could call it that? He bit his lip, wondering if maybe now was the time to leave.

 

[Makenna Morgan]

Makenna adjusted how she was sitting, now crossing her arms over her stomach. The grip she had tighter slightly as she sat there not knowing what to do exactly or even what to say. Her brown eyes were focused on the almost full plate in front of her. She didn't seem to be hungry, finding this annoying and rather uncomfortable trip to the great hall useless in almost every way. You had a small conversation with a boy One of the voices in her head sounded. Yet the other one soon spoke up just as loud, maybe louder. You had a conversation with a boy who won't remember you moments afterward The voice sounded. Makenna nodded slightly seemly as if she was listening to the boy but instead to her own thoughts.

"This school is one of the best" She said simply as she stood up her arms still safely crossed against her stomach, her head looking up at the boy yet her eyes looking right passed him. "it was nice meeting you but I've socialized too much for one day." She said her voice still soft and barely audible against the sounds of the masses. "Maybe we will meet again" She said before turning her slim body walking out of the great hall. Her thoughts concuring that even if she saw this boy again he would not remember her name, rarely people did.

 

[Charlie Linus]

Charlie looked up to see Makenna standing. "Yeah." He said simply as she said perhaps they would meet again. She must be fairly antisocial if she thinks a few exchanged words were counted as socialising. Charlie thought as he watched Makenna leave. He let out a yawn and felt like planting his face in his mashed potatoes, but knew he would get alot of weird looks if he did that. He wanted out of this school. He didnt care how good it was. He placed some more mashed potatoes in his mouth as a distraction and realised just how not hungry he really was. Resting an elbow on the table, he leant his head on his hand, staring blankly across the hall. How was ever going to survive?