Closed Reforming Connections

[Aisa Hunter]

Aisa had returned to Hogwarts for her fifth year, and while she was interested to see what sort of magic she would learn this year, she felt a strange melancholy as well. It had really hit her during this break that she was missing out on a lot while she was in the wizarding world. Every time she returned home and to her old room, it became more obvious just how much time she was spending away from the world she grew up in. Her room hadn't changed since she was eleven, and there was no point in changing anything now because she wouldn't fully occupy it again until she was eighteen. Her old dreams of playing guitar in a band also seemed more far fetched now than ever. She was keeping up with her practices, but it was hard to improve at Hogwarts without proper equipment and with a lot of her time going to learning spells. Aisa had taken her guitar to the cliffs to do some more practicing without being interrupted, but she had ended up leaving it in the case. She looked over the lake, her thoughts troubling her. Abian knew what he wanted to do after Hogwarts, as he hadn't shut up about wanting to be a healer for a few years now. But what was Aisa going to do? None of the wizarding career paths she had heard about really appealed to her so far, but returning to the non-magical world also seemed like it would be a challenge. It was probably something to talk to her head of house about, or even the school counsellor. But the idea of putting herself in such a vulnerable position scared Aisa. She would keep her doubts and worries to herself for now.

 

[Simon Thorne]

Simon felt strange. He couldn't tell if he felt like he had been punched in the stomach, or maybe it was the chest? No, that wasn't it. He felt like being sick or did he want to scream? His mind was racing and he wasn’t sure he even had total control of his body at that moment. But he could feel the weight of the letter from his father, folded tightly and stuffed into his pocket. It was like a lump of lead weighing him down with each step. Of course his father would wait till he was at school to send an ultimatum like this. Just so he wouldn't be able to argue or defend himself. He was in such a haze he hardly noticed he had made it all the way to the cliffs until he felt a strong breeze cut through his relatively light jacket. The cold air seemed to clear his head a bit and he kept walking. Just until he tripped on something and swore loudly. But he froze when he realized he had tripped on a guitar case, and quickly realized it was Aisa's guitar case as he finally looked at her. He let out a slightly manic laugh and whipped his hands over his face, of course it was just his luck. It seemed fitting he would run into the one person at school who hated him while he was at his worst. "Of course, of course!" he nearly shouted out to the cliffs in frustration before turning back to face her. "What do I owe this pleasure to?" he asked a moment later sounding surprisingly calm in comparison to his outburst.

 

[Aisa Hunter]

Aisa was enjoying her solitude, even if she didn't feel inspired to play guitar. Something about the sight of the lake below was calming, but the girl tensed when she heard someone behind her. She half turned as she heard someone laugh, her eyes widening as she saw Simon Thorne, looking... upset? She wasn't sure what to make of him right now, but he looked different than normal. The laugh wasn't really his usual style either, nor was the shouting. Aisa blinked at his question. "I wanted to be alone." She admitted. "I guess you did too?" She then frowned slightly, searching his face. "Are you alright? You... look upset." She said, not bothering to pretend otherwise. She didn't know much about Simon besides that he had bothered her last year and then apologized for it. She hadn't spoken to him since, but really did appreciate the apology. It had made her realize she had probably judged a little too quickly, assuming the boy had just been joking around and messing with her with everything he said.

 

[Simon Thorne]

Simon really wasn't sure if their was a worse person to run into at this moment. “What gave you that idea? Not many people head to the cliffs to find someone to chat with do they?” he said in a much harsher tone then he needed and he wanted to kick himself. He didn’t want to cause any more tension between them, but at this point it felt like reflex. He knew she hated his guts already, why not add more fuel to that particular fire. Simon sighed and pulled out the letter. He unfolded and folded it several times as he considered if he should tell her about it. Would she laugh at him and tell him it was all his fault? Would she agree with his father and call him a failure too? Or would she surprise him and be sympathetic? He took a deep breath and sighed when he realized he doubted it would be the later of those options. “I’ve had better days.” he said finally, slowly and deliberately. "What about you? Why are you sulking?" he asked bluntly, wanting to divert some of the attention away from him.

 

[Aisa Hunter]

Aisa raised her eyebrows a bit at the boy's tone, but it was clear that he was upset so she decided not to comment on it. "Guess not." She simply said, shrugging. She saw he pulled out a letter, and guessed that he must have gotten some bad news. Aisa waited quietly until he spoke again, not sure what he would need right now. "I kind of figured." She told him when he said he'd had better days. "I could leave you alone if you want. But... I could stay too, if you want to talk to someone." She suggested quietly. "I'm not sulking, just... trying to get myself motivated to practice guitar. It's been a while." She said, glancing down at the case. "But it's not happening, at least today." She muttered, glancing over at the water for a moment before looking back at Simon. "Your call. I can leave, or I can stay." She said simply.

 

[Simon Thorne]

Simon sighed, surprised Aisa hadn’t told him off yet or stormed off to get away from him. Instead she actually seemed to listen, which freaked him out more than anything. He wanted to say something sarcastic or mean just to break the sincerity of the moment but he faltered when she offered to leave him alone. That's what he had wanted right? But the more he thought about it he wasn’t so sure that was the best idea. “You can stay.” he said, his voice sounded more ragged then he had realized it would be and he cleared his throat. “You were here first after all.” he added quickly. “How long have you been playing?” he asked and nodded towards the guitar. While he had no musical talent whatsoever, his siblings had an ear for music he could not begin to try and understand. Delilah had been playing violin and piano for years, and apparently Caleb had been trying to teach himself while they were away at school. “And why is that?” he asked, a bit of his usually teasing tone coming back and he nearly forgot about the piece of paper in his hand. But he was genuinely curious what had sent her all the way out here since he figured it wasn’t just for a quiet place to practice.

 

[Aisa Hunter]

Aisa shrugged when Simon said she could stay. He said the reason was that she was here first, and she accepted that. "I started when I was eight." She told him when he asked how long she had been playing. "I used to think I would become famous with it." She added with a wry smile. "Kids are stupid." She added lightly. She shrugged when he asked her why she couldn't, or wouldn't play. "It's because I'm wondering what the point of it all is, practicing something like this." She said, looking over at the water again. "I grew up in the muggle world, I didn't know anything about magic until I got my letter. And now I'm supposed to know what I want to do after Hogwarts. I know I'm not going to be a famous guitarist, but I don't know what I can be." She told him, glancing at him. "I don't know. It's been making me feel stressed." She admitted, looking away from Simon again. She didn't usually say anything real like this, and she wasn't sure why it was coming out now. "My brother is usually the clueless one, but he's been focused on becoming a healer for years now. And I think he'll actually manage it." She said, some admiration in her voice as she said it. Abian had always been terrible at school, giving up before even trying. She had heard many arguments between him and their mother about his grades over the years. But he'd turned it all around because he had a goal. "I'm just... floating aimlessly. I guess." She said quietly. Then she abruptly changed her tone as she looked at him. "Your turn. I told you something real, you're here for a reason too." She said. "Though you don't have to tell me any details if you don't want to. I didn't say those things to guilt you into talking to me."

 

[Simon Thorne]

Simon found himself smiling as Aisa began to talk about playing guitar and her childhood dreams. “I don’t know if that’s stupid.” he offered. “Optimistic maybe.” he suggested. “Or is that just the same as stupid? I can never tell.” he mused before she continued. The more she spoke about her fears for the future, the more he felt like she was just explaining his own mess of emotions but much more eloquently than he ever could. He couldn’t relate to the specifics but, the fear of the vast and yet limited future in front of them rang true. Simon stayed uncharacteristically silent when she finished until she turned the conversation back to him. “My turn?” he asked before letting out a strangled laugh and he remembered the piece of parchment in his hand. He had almost forgotten. It was impressive that all it took to get his mind off things was for Aisa to actually speak to him. He swallowed hard as his despair and anxiety came rushing back and crashed over him like a tidal wave, soaking him to the bone and ruining his shoes. He realized now that he did want to talk about it even if telling someone would make it a real and tangible thing. But still, the words felt like they were trapped inside him and his jaw clenched keeping them in. “I got a letter from my father today.” he began finally, and it felt like breaking a seal. He held up the already worn piece of paper that looked ancient already after bending it back and forth for hours. “He says...if I don’t get my act together, pull up my grades, and make something out of myself before I graduate-” he trailed off as his throat started to get tight. “If I don’t do that he will cut me off. Financially mostly, and socially I guess.” he finished quickly, glad to have the words finally out. “I don’t think he’ll disown completely, not that he wouldn’t want to but because that might look worse for him. It would be easier for him to brush off questions and just say I wanted to 'make it on my own'. Not that I wouldn’t want that, and honestly it would be a relief to be out from under him finally but-” he stopped abruptly, realizing he was now speaking very quickly and he was runny out of breath. Not to mention rambling and sharing far too much information then he intended. "Sorry." he mumbled, not able to look her in the eyes and he wasn't even entirely sure what he was apologizing for.

 

[Aisa Hunter]

Aisa snorted at Simon's words. "I think optimistic and stupid are pretty much the same thing." She said with a hint of a smile, that turned into a smile as Simon pretty much said the same thing. She hadn't known much about him before, had always just assumed the worst. She still didn't really trust him, but couldn't help appreciating the way he had apologized for his actions and had left her alone. Still, she felt strangely vulnerable after she was done talking about her worries for the future. She never really said this to anyone. Who would she tell? Sully wouldn't get it, he never worried about anything that wasn't in the near future. And it wasn't like she had a lot of other friends. She liked the way things were right now with Adorah, and didn't want to ruin that with her sad thoughts. Apparently they had needed to be let out, though she kind of wished she had just bought a diary rather than spilling it to a boy she didn't entirely trust. But then Simon actually opened up himself, which she hadn't really expected. Aisa listened quietly as he explained about the letter he had gotten from his father, and as he spoke, her stomach sank. Her own problems suddenly seemed small in comparison to this. No matter how little her mother understood of the magical world, Aisa always knew she would be there to support her. "That's terrible." She said earnestly, looking at him with a quiet sadness. "Don't be sorry. That... that really sucks." She said, grimacing a little at how her words sounded, how weak and inadequate after what Simon had said. "Grades aren't everything, you're more than just that." She said quietly. "I hope your dad will see that too, soon." Was all she could offer.

 

[Simon Thorne]

Simon cracked a half hearted grin at Aisa’s comment about optimism. He agreed with the sentiment but he couldn’t help but feel jealous of people who could be optimistic. It seemed like a nice way to be. But now he was feeling deflated. The big emotions were receding and he just felt tired and a little embarrassed about all that he had said. He couldn’t even imagine what Aisa was probably thinking. He wanted to defend his family and explain that they weren’t awful or at least his mother wasn’t as bad or something that would make his face stop burning, but nothing came. “It was supposed to be easy.” he said sighed, feeling defeated. “I was supposed to go to school, make all the right friends. Get a job wherever my father works and go through the motions. Go about and have a silly little life.” he finished and tried not to sound bitter. Saying it now, that future sounded like a nightmare even before the news he had considered it like a death sentence. But Simon couldn’t help the sadness he felt knowing it wasn’t going to happen. He was technically free to make his own way now, but that seemed much more terrifying. “I know they’re not.” he added softly as Aisa tried to reassure him. “I contain value beyond academics.” he said thematically, hoping to earn a smile from her, but it felt hollow and he felt himself deflate again. “I just don’t know what that value is.” he said sadly. "Maybe you can teach me guitar?" he suggested before laughing as Aisa commented about his father coming around. “I don’t think I’d hold my breath waiting for that to happen.” he said dryly. He glanced at her, feeling bad for being such a bummer and feeling embarrassed at his vulnerability. But she hadn’t run off yet to go tell the whole school about how much of a failure he was so, that was a good sign.