Closed Point Of Contact

[October Alcott]

The sights, sounds, even smells of a familiar cafe felt near-overwhelming, in a way October hadn't expected. She had chosen the meeting place so carefully - not her favourite cafe, so as not to taint her memories of the place if this meeting went sideways - but a familiar cafe, nonetheless. A good, public location, so hopefully the conversation wouldn't get too heated, as they would both have to mind their volume for the sake of the muggles around. She had dressed in a classy but flattering outfit, to present the most dignified front she could manage. And if Sia was reminded of what she was missing, that wouldn't be a bad thing. But more importantly, if this was the end of their relationship, she would be the classy one. She wouldn't be humiliated again like Tristan had done so long ago. She did her best to contain the shaking of her hands as she sipped her coffee, waiting for Sia to arrive.

 

[Sia Tofilau]

If Sia thought calling October had been daunting, it had nothing on stepping into the coffee shop to meet her. She was still a mess of emotions; shame, anger, envy, sadness, all tangled up in her gut in a confusing ball. The feeling only multiplied when she saw October already seated, her heart thumping leaden in her chest. It had taken some de-tangling of her complicated feelings and a long, difficult talk with Adelia to get there, but under all her own issues, Sia had truly missed October, and she stalled for a moment at the door just looking at her, taking everything in before she willed herself to move and sit down, aware how fragile everything really was with them all.

"Hey," Sia said, suddenly at a loss for how to even begin this conversation. "I-" Sia took a deep breath, "Thanks. For showing up," she said instead, resting her palms on the tabletop between them, wishing she'd stopped to order something but not trusting herself to get up and do it now.

 

[October Alcott]

October had practiced this conversation in her mind what felt like hundreds of times, but none of it had prepared her for what it would actually feel like to see Sia again. Her stomach twisted tight with nerves and she sat up even straighter, wishing more than ever before that she wasn't so much shorter than the other woman. She gripped her coffee cup tight as Sia sat down, studying the face of the woman she loved, desperate for any hint of how this conversation might go. She was surprised that Sia started off by thanking her, nodding slowly. October had practiced this conversation in her mind so many times, so sure of what to say, how to compose herself, but now it all felt silly in the light of actually seeing Sia. "I... think you owe me an explanation." She said slowly, struggling to keep the tremble out of her voice. "Our last conversation was humiliting."

 

[Sia Tofilau]

Sia bristled at October's comment, the familiar anger and betrayal from before welling back up along with the urge to defend herself. She pushed it back down though, the annoyingly logical part of her brain (a part that sounded suspiciously like Adelia's voice) reminding her that it was true. She hadn't explained really at all what was going to October. And it wasn't fair to her. Instead, Sia took a deep breath, fortifying herself for a moment and trying to focus on that familiar warmth in her chest that she'd felt getting to finally see October again. That feeling she wanted hold onto far more than the hurt and jealousy she'd been stuck with since she'd last seen her girlfriend.

"You're right," she said with a sigh. "I shouldn't have... Blown up at you like that I did. You just caught me by surprise and it was all a bit much," she said grimly, unable to resist the urge to grab a napkin and begin slowly shredding it, just to give herself something to do with her hands. "It's just. I'd just found out my little brother was, y'know, magical too. And it was bad enough finding out my other brother was. I just felt so left out, knowing there was this amazing world I wasn't allowed to be involved with and all. And then I find out you're magic too and I reacted badly." Sia sighed again. "I am sorry, really. I was so proud of what I was doing in school, and having you, and I thought I had my life together, and then all that just. Made me feel so small. I get why you couldn't tell me, but it still. Sucked. It sucked," Sia said, shaking her head as she tried to find the words. She knew October didn't owe her an explanation about magic; her family had had it all explained to them very clearly about who they were allowed to tell, but a part of her still ached to know October had been keeping such a huge secret from her too.

 

[October Alcott]

October had known it was risky, going into this so snippy, but after all the pain of the last few months she knew she had every right to be frustrated. So it was a relief when Sia appeared to agree, and October could feel the tension draining from her shoulders as Sia apologised for the confrontation. Watching her girlfriend's (?) hands slowly reducing one of their napkins down to the atomic level, she had to fight the urge to just take Sia's hands in her own. She had to be strong. They had to discuss this seriously. She looked back up at Sia's face quickly and listened as she explained the situation, letting out a slow breath as she took it all in. It was only once Sia had finished speaking that she finally gave in, letting one of her hands slide slowly across the table, never taking Sia's entirely but giving the smallest nudge of invitation.

"I... see." She said slowly. "It... took me a long time to even... understand why you were angry. You just... blew up at me. Out of nowhere." She took a shaky breath, pushing down the hurt and trying to focus on the now. "I thought maybe you were a squib... a, um, a person with magical parents but no magic of their own... but you're... muggleborn, with two magical brothers?" She asked slowly, trying to confirm what she had gleaned from Sia's explanation. "That's... that's difficult, that's really difficult, but it doesn't... it doesn't take away any of the things you've accomplished, it doesn't... negate who you are. It just means you and your brothers are different. But everything you've accomplished, you've accomplished by your own merits." She hesitated, trying to find the words. "The magical world has... hurt me a lot." She said slowly. "I... left. Almost entirely. I wanted a fresh start, I wanted people who didn't know about all my mistakes. All... all the things that were done to me." She paused again, closing her eyes for a moment to collect her thoughts and find her words. "But I never... wanted to lie to you. It's been hard, not... being able to introduce you to my dads, or... or talk about my old school, or any of it. I never wanted to lie, I just wanted... a fresh start."

 

[Sia Tofilau]

Sia's felt her lips do the smallest of quirks at the edge when October reached out across the table, hands brushing, and she allowed herself a moment to hook their pinkies together, the smallest bridge of contact as they both tried to navigate through what they were doing. The whole situation felt entirely ridiculous and yet incredibly grown up and Sia tried to focus on October's words and not the absurdity of it all.

It was harder when October started to throw around some of the weird words Sully used that she was sure he only brought up to aggravate her. The same out of depth feeling that made her feel so outside of things, though she fiercely reminded herself October was just trying to understand. "Yeah.. I think that's right," she said slowly. "I just, I spent all my life thinking I was going to do great things and be special. It's been hard knowing that it all exists and I'm not invited. That I'm not good enough," she said with a sigh, eyes dropping to their linked pinkies. "That means a lot, coming from you," she said with a small grin. October had always amazed her, her talent, her drive, her intelligence - though an unkind part of her mind wondered if she'd done so well because she was actually a witch, but Sia would never dare voice that. "I can't.. imagine what on Earth would convince you to leave all that behind but. I guess if you ever want to talk about it. I'm here to listen now. When you're ready," she said, heart hurting to imagine something could have happened to October to make her give up such an amazing world, something Sia wanted so badly. Or that something could make October herself feel so small. "Well, I guess there's no more big secrets now so. If you wanted we could. Do all that. If you want?" It was a fragile hope, that they could go back to how things were before. Or something like it. Their relationship was changed, forever now, with all this out in the open, but maybe it was good, to have that wall between them gone, even if it was going to take Sia a while to understand this new side of October.

 

[October Alcott]

As much as she wanted to stand her ground, to be on her own side first no matter what, October felt the faint flutter of her heart as Sia linked their pinkies, the contact almost enough to make her cry. She listened as Sia expressed her feelings, heart breaking slightly for her plight. "That must be horrible." October said softly, finally understanding where the pain of Sia's outburst had come from. It didn't make it okay that that anger had been directed at her, but she understood at last.

October couldn't hold back a small, bitter laugh when Sia said she didn't know why October would leave the magical world behind, shaking her head. "The people. It's like... the entire country is a small town. I never... people didn't... really like me at Hogwarts, I never had friends, really. But I, um... I had a boyfriend, for a while. He... we were bad for each other. We were... we brought out the most toxic parts of each other, and this was right when... I've told you a bit about my dad really pushing me academically, and... that was all going on. And then I had this boyfriend who was so competitive, and we... it was bad. And that's horrible, but we broke up, and I thought I could just get on with my life. But years later I found out he had been cheating on me, the whole time. And it wasn't, like... like... someone just told me, or I found evidence, or something. The guy who he cheated on me with stood up and announced it in front of the whole school. And... he was toxic, but at the time I had really loved him, and then everyone knew he had... knew what he did. I just... I was... nobody liked me but I was so visible, I was Head Girl, I was running a club and captaining a Quidditch team, there... there wasn't anywhere to hide. Everyone knew, and everyone hated me already. I wasn't even enough for the one person who was supposed to have ever liked me. So I just... I decided I needed a fresh start after graduation. Where nobody knew me. I could... fix myself, I could... start over, with people who might actually like me. And it... it pretty much worked, but... I don't ever go back. Everyone still remembers me as... as that pathetic..." She trailed off, only now realising that her hands had clenched, that she was now gripping Sia's pinky what had to be painfully tightly. "Sorry..."

October choked back a small laugh when Sia said there were no more secrets, shaking her head. "Actually, there's one more thing." She laughed nervously, lifting her free hand to wipe her eyes. "I know how this is going to sound, but my dad is a werewolf. It's, um, he's totally safe to be around, he has a potion that lets him... you know, lets him control it when there's a full moon, but, um, you know, that hasn't always been the case. He's got a few scars. That's... part of why I was putting it off, I didn't know how to explain that. Not like he could have been attacked by a regular wolf in New Zealand, and France doesn't have a ton of them either."

 

[Sia Tofilau]

Sia let out a snort, nodding weakly at October's assessment. It was horrible. Had been horrible. Sia was doing her best to get through it, but she just hoped October would let her have her bad days, even if Sia was sure she didn't entirely deserve that level of grace. She the way their hands looked linked together between them, Sia hoped it'd be worth it regardless.

She was quietly surprised that her offer to October to share what had happened to her was taken up immediately, but she supposed October's emotions were probably just as high as her own. It was good to get it all out in the open, like lancing a boil. "Their loss," she said quietly when October mentioned not being liked at school, something she found hard to believe, but she didn't want to interrupt. Sia's face darkened as October's story went on and she understand October's immense desire to escape from it all. "I'm... Sorry that happened, Tobie," she said, chancing it by reaching across the table again and laying her hand over their linked hads. "Guess I should be grateful you just decided to run off to Wellington and not like, Antarctica," she offered with a small smile. It was true that Sia was still bitter, and she'd no doubt hurt October in the process too, but she knew, without a doubt, that pushing past her own spiny emotions was worth it, for someone like October.

Sia's stomach dropped when October mentioned one more thing, bracing for whatever October was about to drop. Everything still felt so fragile between them and she couldn't imagine was October was about to say. 'My Dad's a werewolf' was not it. Sia stared at October mutely for a few seconds, brain trying to process it all before she let out a snort. Quickly followed by a peel of laughter she desperately tried to tamp down until she was guffawing loudly, pulling her hands back to cover her mouth. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, you're being so honest and sweet and serious and GOD my life is so weird," she said, voice muffled around her fingers as she giggled. "I think-" Sia took a deep breath, trying to calm herself, pausing to wipe a tear from her eye, "-You know I think I can handle that. Like, why not, aye?" She said, giving October a fond, exhausted, but loving look as she reached back over the table.

 

[October Alcott]

As soon as her outburst was over, October felt guilty for taking the conversation over so much. She hadn't meant to let everything out at once, but there it was, and now they were here. She smiled slightly when Sia spoke, heart fluttering at the nickname, and she chuckled lightly at Sia's joke. "Oh, I almost went back to France, you got lucky." She teased, relieved beyond words to be able to smile and laugh with Sia again. It had been so long she had almost been numb to the loss, but now that she had this back, she didn't know how she had ever lived without it.

The news about her dad was something October had no idea what to expect in response to. She knew all too well the role werewolves played in Muggle mythology, and though Sia would have no way of knowing the magical prejudices her dad faced, it would likely be plenty to make her scared. So when Sia's response was to laugh instead, October almost didn't know what to do with that. Her mouth dropped open for a moment before she let out a helpless giggle in response, relieved as Sia's words melted the last of the tension. Finally, it was all done. There were no secrets left, they could just... be. She grinned in relief, hands shifting to grip both of Sia's in her own. "I've wanted to tell you all this stuff for so long..." She breathed, unable to help the softness in her voice. "It's... such a relief."