Or Not To Be

[Riley Mauven]

continued from this topic

Riley lay curled upon the hospital bed, facing away from the door with her cheeks still damp with sweat and tears. For her own protection the empty cradle had been removed from her room as she fell fast asleep, exhausted both physically and emotionally from what she had just put her body and her heart through. That afternoon when they had arrived at St. Mungo's Kalani had called Will and Frances and Tamas and they had arrived as soon as they could to be there for the birth of their family's next generation, and now they stood in the hall together, each one battling to keep the straighter face, for if any weak emotions were to show through that weakness could be impressed upon their daughter, sister and girlfriend. Leaving Sebastien behind and apparating with her sister to the hospital had been harder than one would have thought for Riley. After nineteen years she had found her father, embraced him with an open heart and mind, she had forgiven him for abandoning her pregnant mother and tried to understand the situation at hand. But after the blow out between Kalani and their birth father it seemed that Frances, their mother was to blame for any and all of the hurt caused by the absence of a father in their lives. Whether the twins chose to believe him or not, Sebastien had told them their mother had lied to them all this time, but worst of all lied to him, told him that the babies she was carrying did not belong to him. The ability for a woman to hold onto such a secret astounded Riley as she thought over it in the seconds she had stepped foot into the hospital, about to have her baby. But now as she lay with her hands around her empty stomach she didn't dream of her past and what could have been, she dreamt of her child, her baby girl growing up to be more beautiful than any of the Alexandra woman, and smarter than her, she would grow into a perfect young woman, one that Riley and Will would forever be proud of. For amidst her dreams Riley's wandering mind refused to believe that her teenage pregnancy would turn out to be just another mistake, baby Connors would be nothing short of perfect, and the best thing that had ever happened to the nineteen year old parents.

Riley awoke with a start, her eyes sticking for a moment to the dampness that surrounded them. She blinked and looked around the room, taking a moment to sit up and take her new surroundings in. After the dream of her daughter's perfect future she had awoken to her worst nightmare, an empty hospital room and her fingers spread across her empty body. Tears broke fresh once more and tumbled across her flushed cheeks as she gasped for the air that her sadness and desperation was robbing her of. Immediately her mother sensed her awakening and rushed to her side, taking her daughter's head into her hands and holding it to her chest, comforting her in the way only a mother could. "I didn't do anything wrong," she begged, clutching onto her mother's arms as she cried into her chest, "The healer said I didn't do anything wrong." she said again, as though if she said it out loud enough times she might start to believe it herself. But she couldn't come to terms with it, not yet. Her baby had died, her beautiful baby girl was gone, just this morning she had been fine, but now she was gone and they could never have her back. Riley didn't want to be seen, she didn't want anybody to know what had happened and what she looked like now. She was ashamed that such a thing could have happened, that she had killed her baby, even if it wasn't her fault, how was she to believe it? She had been carrying the child inside of her, and it hadn't survived, who else's fault could it have been. "She said it's nobody's fault." she spilled as the tears came stronger than ever. Riley had forgotten all about the family drama that had gone down hours previously, right now she needed her mother to hold her and never let her go. ​

 

[Frances Mauven]

The day had started as any other, Frannie had woken late when Tamas had brought her gourmet breakfast in bed. Having a chef and restaurant owner for a husband was something that had come in handy for the thirty seven year old, though she did have a sinking feeling that he constantly cooked for the family and took them out to one of his restaurants because her cooking was so terrible. Though it didn't matter to her now, Wendla and Gwendolyn were a few months old now and they were becoming a handful. Frances had completely forgotten how hard it was to look after twins, it had been nineteen years after all since the birth of her daughters Riley and Kalani. But it was much easier this time around, Tamas had been a wonderful help, and whenever life became overwhelming for her he was right beside her to help out. This was something that often left the mother pondering how Riley and Lani's father could have handled being a father, she had been so quick as a teenager to assume he couldn't have been up to the task and had told him she was pregnant to another man to protect him, and give him the youth he deserved. But now word had gotten to her through Lani that Sebastien was back in the picture, and it was only a matter of time until the truth came out, she could only hope she would be able to handle it calmly and in a sophisticated matter. The fact that Sebastien was rumoured to be supporting Riley through her pregnancy only brought up more anger within Frances though, she was sure he would turn her against her, something she didn't want despite the anger between the mother and daughter. It seemed unbelievable that Frances, pregnant again, was carrying her child at the very same time as her daughter but the Mauvens had had to come to accept the fact that their family, however broken, would come back together somehow in the end. Just as Frances had settled the twins into their cribs though the phone rang loudly through the European home and the cries of the two tiny people tried to match the volume as Frances sighed and answered. She hadn't expected the call from Lani, Riley's baby wasn't due for another few months, yet Lani insisted that the baby was on the way. No matter what their current relationship, Frannie knew she had a duty to be there for her daughter the way that her own mother hadn't been. So she threw on a coat and called for her husband to arrange for his adopted daughter Simone to come and babysit the twins and within the hour they were at St. Mungo's awaiting the news of the newest Mauven.

But by the time they had arrived it seemed grave news was to be delivered, and Tamas, Frances, Kalani and Will found themselves standing outside Riley's room, biting their lips and trading nervous glances through tear glazed eyes. Frances had not wished for her daughter to become pregnant, in fact she had slapped her when she had heard the news, but now this, this she would never wish on anyone. The baby had been lost and the healers had not yet described to the family what had happened, they had only be told they could visit Riley now, though none of them knew what to say to her or what to do. They waited loyally outside her room in the hospital as she slept and as soon as noise or movement was heard Frances rushed to her daughter's side. Sweeping her daughter into her arms and holding her tightly and closely into her chest, cradling her like a child. Frannie began to cry too as her daughter tried to make excuses for herself, when nobody ever expected her to. Stroking her daughter's hair Frannie squeezed her tighter, "I know you didn't do anything wrong, baby, I know," she hushed as her cheeks grew red with the tears that fell against them. "It wasn't your fault." she echoed, at that very point there was nothing she wanted to do more than make her daughter feel better, she would do anything that she could. But when there was nothing more she could do for her, and Riley wanted to be left alone Frances left the room, shutting the door behind her so that her daughter could try and get some more sleep in peace. There was nothing more that the family could do but wait, and the mother felt as though waiting was what they would be doing for a very long time, such a wound would not heal over night. But the small part of the family left deserted in the hall were not alone for long, as excited talking was heard and from around the corner came Amaryllis, Jennifer, Edgar, and then Sam and Indianna followed by friend's of Will's and other people from Riley's quidditch team and even others she had attended Hogwarts New Zealand with. With them they carried pink balloons and comically oversized teddy bears, and in each of their faces was the look of excitement that they would soon have to crush as they all called out to Will in excitement as his back was turned to them, his head in his hands. ​

 

[Kalani Mauven]

Through the arguents, the silence and even the claims of hatred between the twins there was love there so Kalani did all she could to get to Saint Mungo's as safely as possible and quickly got a healer who put her sister in a wheelchair and wheeled her off to the closest delivary room, giving Kalani a moment to let everyone know what was happening as ask Amy and Jenn to set up that cot that Sebastien had no doubt left behind and put up a banner saying some sort of congratulation to the new mother and with all this excitement Kalani had barely noticed that in the hospital room her niece was dying and her sister's heart was unknowingly breaking so she had mentioned Sebastien's statement to her mother only to be cut off by news she never expected she would feel upset about. Kalani felt tears whell in her eyes and was so distracted by grief that she had not thought about letting everyone know that they ought to go home. It was too late for her to do that because just as Kalani was about to join her small family she saw a parade of Will and Riley's friends. The large bears, balloons and smiling faces made her hate that her poor sister, her poor breakable sister, was the one this happened to. Even if Kalani knew it was horrible she did wish that this pain was some other families burden. Kalani turned to Will who seeed to be sprouting fresh tears and sighed, putting her hand supportively on his shoulder as she passed him and walked towards Edgar.

On a normal day Kalani would have hugged or kissed Edgar as a greeting but today it was just the facts in a nearly silent voice, "Edgar... She lost the baby." Tears threatened to spill down Kalani's pale cheeks which was not a sight Edgar was unfamiliar with but she didn't want him to see her like this anymore so she glanced around them before putting a hand on his cheek, silently asking him to send everyone home because none of the family was in a state to do it themselves. Thankfully this seeed to be all he needed to hear because Kalani turned away and walked back to Will and didn't receive any objections or mentions of a hug or a kiss goodbye. The idea of kissing Edgar right now just seemed wrong and unfair because Kalani had expected to kiss the brow of her newborn niece which was not to be. It hadn't been the first time that she had imagined herself in Riley's position because she knew that at that party all those months ago she might have been intimate with Edgar and this horrible loss could have happened to them. Loosing ballet and the child she would have lost it for simply would have killed her but it was not her. Instead it was sweet Riley who did nothing to deserve to abandonment from her family for something that she would have to put to rest. Kalani glanced in Edgar's direction and sighed softly as he came to her rescue once more as she saw him help her by filing people out of the hospital. Looking back towards Riley's room Kalani looked over at Will and offered her hand so they could each go in. When he stood, Kalani held Will's hand firmly as if she was trying to keep them both from collapsing as they both entered the room. The ballerina's legs were shaking and she did her very best to keep her face strong for Riley as she had always tried to in the past but now it seemed ever so impossible. Kalani freed Will's hand and walked towards Riley and her Mom. After so much fighting it might seem hard for Kalani, who was excellent at holding grudges, to find her way back into the small family embraces but it wasn't because all she knew was that Riley needed to be held and even if she wasn't their mother she did so anyway. Kalani wrapped her arms around Riley tightly and mumbled into the blonde's long hair, "I'm sorry." There were a number of things that she felt guilty about when it came to her twin but now she was apologizing for what she felt was the reason the little girl was not an addition to their family - Kalani's apparation.​

 

[Will Connors]

Will could still remember the minute he met his girlfriend, as shallow as it might have seemed he had immediately thought she was hot. The young Daily Prophet intern had come to interview him about his position on his Quidditch team and take his photo, but the eighteen year old had been far too distracted to be of any use to her. Now, he was nineteen and Riley was his girlfriend, and she had the photo she had taken of him for the newspaper framed on her bed side cabinet. But the young Quidditch stars had been through more than just that in the past year, the carefree young man's life had changed the moment that Riley had stepped into his apartment in Paris, followed by her step father Tamas, bringing him the news that she was pregnant, with his child. The months that followed had been tough on the young couple, tougher than they ever could have thought possible. They had loved each other, but Will didn't know if it would be enough to raise a child with her, they were only nineteen. Then the distance had come between them, the press that Will thought he had gotten used to brushing off had covered a story on Riley's dismissal from the Holyhead Harpies, and speculation on whether she really was off for injury, or whether it could have been something more than that. Ever since the escalation of the rumours in the Quidditch world, Will's girlfriend had hid her bump and hid herself in her New York apartment, he had hardly seen her in the past few months because as much as he regretted having to do it, Will worked through her pregnancy, if he were to leave his team it would only damage their relationship and reputation more, and what he needed to do the most was to protect his girlfriend and their unborn child. Many a night had been spent in his Paris apartment slouched against his bedroom wall surrounded by his clothes strewn across the floor with his head in his hands, wondering how everything had all suddenly gotten so tough, begging for somebody to blame in the situation, when really Will and Riley only had themselves to blame when it come down to it all. They should have been more careful, they should have, but they hadn't, it had happened and the repercussions were clear. The minute Will had been called off of the pitch, he knew the news that was to be delivered to him had to be about his girlfriend, Riley. Though the baby wasn't due for a couple of months yet, disturbances were to be expected, and the nineteen year old knew that Riley was meeting with her biological father today to set up the nursery, which Will was ever so grateful for, her father had manned up in Will's absence, and he needed to thank him for it in some way. Though any thought that had been on his mind and he jumped down from his broomstick was lost when the news was delivered to him, Will pulled off his pink uniform jumper and pulled on a tee shirt, immediately apparating to St. Mungo's, his child was about to be born and he prayed to God for it to be the happiest moment of his life, that and that it wouldn't come out with lips as big as his, it was quite the burden.

Standing outside of his girlfriend's room, Will Connors had his head in his hands, tears still pouring as quickly as they had been a few hours before when a healer had approached him quietly, and softly, as if he thought that the blow would be softened if they spoke about it man-to-man. But now Will felt nothing like a man, he felt like a boy, a poor lost boy with tears streaming from his face as he contemplated all that had struck him that day, all that would continue to strike them for the rest of their lives. Riley's mother had held him, and Tamas had placed a strong hand on his back, though nothing, no amount of comfort or touch could pacify the nineteen year old. Just that morning he had been on the pitch, working hard to bring home money to his girlfriend, who he had unexpectedly been starting a family with, they were supposed to have their own small person to care for and to love together, to make all of the pain and heartache they had caused within their families all worth it, but now it seemed as though that heartache and pain was echoing through his body, his limbs were weak and his ears burned from hearing Riley's cries from within the hospital room. He had had to explain the situation to Riley's parents, and as her mother comforted her daughter Will turned to Tamas, sobbing as he had to bring the pain back up into reality, "They let me hold her," he said through the tears that caught in his throat, "and they let Riley hold her, whe-when she woke up" he explained, as he received Tamas' hand sternly on his shoulder once more, another comfort that still didn't seem adequate for the situation at hand. Turned away from the corridor he hoped to shield himself from the world, even if only for a moment, but his hope seemed far as a commotion made it's way towards him, a commotion of his friends, led on by an excited phone call someone had forgotten making about the excitement of the birth of a baby to their friends, that had begun and ended just as quickly. Will turned around slowly to face the party of baby gifts and smiley faces, causing him to burst into a fresh set of tears, bending over as his stomach began to ache. Edgar stepped in front of him, seeing that he was needed and Will watched him keep a stern face as he delivered the news, "Riley is safe, but the baby," he began seriously, "the baby is gone." hearing it repeated made the pain seem fresher each time and Will felt dizzy as he watched Kalani leave to go and comfort her sister and his girlfriend, he leant up against the wall, trying to keep himself upright, but when he couldn't do it he slid down against it, his head falling in between his knees as the image of his perfectly delicate but cold baby daughter had been placed in his hands, a feeling of desperation and failure washed over him, fathers were supposed to protect their daughters, and in that Will had failed, and he would pay for it for the rest of his life. ​