My Favourite Reason

[Jennifer Wilkonson]

Jenn was finding it very difficult to sleep, just the thought that Kadie and Matthew had kissed each other good night was one to give her sleepless nightmares. As she was bundled up in her blankets, starring lazily at the ceiling of her room, she felt a tad nauseous and needed some fresh air so she stood up quickly, straightening the sleeves of her deep purple, long sleeved shirt.

Not wishing to disturb anyone, Jenny tiptoed outside of her bedroom and down the stairs. She felt around for the walls and stepped carefully around anything that she could stub her toe on in the darkness. Finding that there was no way she could wake anyone else up now, she slid her fingers along the walls for the light switch which she found and flicked on. It took her a few second of squinting her eyes to adjust them to the bright light.

She walked over to the front door and opened it quietly, she didn't step out but she let the cool night air wisp around her long, thin legs and breeze through her blonde locks.

lame post.

 

[Matthew Reed]

Matthew sighed impatiently as he waited for sleep to take hold of him him but his eyes wouldn't close, instead he stared endlessly at the ceiling. The fact that he was sleeping on the sofa didn't help either, at the time Matt didn't mind that Kadie wanted his room, but now he really could do with his comfortable bed. The thought of Kadie was quickly replaced with the thought of Jenny. Jenny. She had been occupying his mind for most of the night. With Kadie things were so much easier, he didn't think of Jenny at all but now that he had seen her for the first time since their kiss how on earth was he supposed to get her off his mind when he knew she was just up the stairs, when he knew that she would be spending the whole of the holidays here in his home.

Matt tried to reposition himself on the leather sofa which was now sticking to his bare back. But it didn't work. Nothing worked. How does she do this?! Matt thought with great fustration towards Jenny even though he knew that this was not her fault. Matt rolled over onto his side again and reached over to his watch. Two AM. Great. Matt wanted to get up early the next day before Kadie or anybody else, he wanted to try writing again. Since Kadie came along he didn't really get time to write songs anymore which definitely was a downside to dating her. Matt got up from the sofa, he would do what he did everytime he couldn't sleep. It was gauranteed to work. After streching quietly, Matthew put on his t-shirt and left the sitting room. His bare feet slapped loudly against the wooden floorboards but he knew it wouldn't wake anyone. Turning towards the kitchen Matt felt a cold breeze hit his legs, he spun around quickly to see the front door wide open with Jenny standing there. What the hell? He cleared his throat softly, "Jenny?"

 

[Jennifer Wilkonson]

Jenny snapped her neck around when she heard her name being called by Matthew. Her eyes widened in shock and her mouth parted delicately in shock as she starred at him, not a hundred percent sure what to say. "Did I wake you?" she asked softly, hoping that she did not do that because she wasn't sure if she really could be with him right now, not with her mind so scrambled up and her heart hurting from the discovery of his relationship with the ditzy blonde, Kadie.

Her blue eyes flicked over to the door before smiling shyly at Matthew again. "I couldn't sleep," she explained as she stood on the tips of her toes to stretch her ankles and really do anything from looking directly into Matthew's eyes so she wouldn't show what she felt.

 

[Matthew Reed]

Thoughts were swirling around in Matthew's head at that moment. Thoughts that he knew he would have absoulute no control over, not while he was standing right in front of Jenny. "Nah. I was already awake." He told her, his hand doing a lazy indication towards the sitting room. As she informed him that she couldn't sleep, Matt nodded whilst staring at Jenny in silence. He looked away for a couple of seconds before deciding to break the silence, "I couldn't sleep either. I'm actually going to get some warm mil-" Matt said at a quick pace before stopping suddenly. It didn't sound so feminine in his head, but now that he heard it, warm milk wasn't exactly a masculine drink. Sh*t, Matt rubbed the back of his neck out of pure embarassment, "..eh..I mean-" he began but sighed in defeat and a cute smile formed on his lips. "There's no way I can save that is there?" Matthew laughed as he shook his head out of pure embarassment.

 

[Jennifer Wilkonson]

Jenny, fighting with her heart and her mind, smiled at Matthew as he said that he was already awake. It was a bit of a relief but she still wished that he was not with her because she was having thoughts about him abd they were simply too strong to ignore. As he said that he was going to get some warm milk, she giggled a little before smiling with hidden affection for him in her cerulean blue eyes. "No Matthew, there isn't. But don't worry, your secret is safe with me," she said with a playful wink.

"I actually wouldn't mind some myself, come on," Jenn said as she closed the door behind her before skipping towards the kitchen. As she entered she opened the fridge door and bent over, looking for the milk as she thought, Oh goodie, I get to spend time with Matthew without Kadie. She cringed to herself as she remembered that nothing would happen between them, it really wasn't the way she had imagined her arrival at the Reed house.

 

[Matthew Reed]

Matt looked at ground uncomfortably waiting for Jenny to make fun of him but she didn't. It surprised him that she actually wanted to have warm milk with him. "Great!" Matt said looking up at the blonde happily, Dude chill you have a girlfriend! He reminded himself carefully. Jenny was a friend. She practically was family! He had a girlfriend! Why was he getting so excited? It was just Jenny. However, Matthew didn't really believe that 'just' and 'Jenny' should really be allowed in the same sentence. Matt followed Jenny slowly to find her already at the fridge. He took a few steps so that he stood over her and reached in to the top shelf of the fridge where the milk was lying horizontally. "Go sit. I'll make it." He said giving her a nudge on the shoulder with his hand almost as if shooing her away.

Matt still didn't know why he was so excited, if anything this 'milk drinking' should be awkward as hell. This would be the first time they were alone since the kiss. Taking out two mugs from the press he quickly tried to think of conversation starters but all he could think about was her. This is ridiculous! He wanted to yell so loud so badly. He had a girlfriend he shouldn't be thinking of someone other than her like this. Especially not Jenny. Matthew poured even amounts of milk into each mug and took his wand which was coincidently on the countertop and cast a simple spell that was ever so handy, the two mugs of cold milk now became two mugs of piping hot milk. Acting as casual as possible he wrapped his long fingers around the handles of the mugs and cautiously walked around to the otherside of the counter to Jenny making sure not to spill any on his way. Sucessfully, he placed them down and slid a mug over to Jenny, "Careful, its hot."

 

[Jennifer Wilkonson]

Jenn had just spotted the milk laying on it's side when she felt Matthew lean over her. He was so close to her that she could almost feel the warmth that radiated from him, or perhaps that was just blood being rushed about her body. Her breath was caught in her throat as she imagined him kissing her but of course he wouldn't, he had a girlfriend and she was just Jenny to him. "Okay," she whispered quietly as she stood up, watching him for a moment in fondness before she closed the door to the fridge and moving towards the stools where she sat comfortably in.

Jenn tried to come up with something to speak about as Matthew poured the milk so gracefully into each mug but her voice was lost and she could do little else but watch him; watch and yearn. It of course didn't take long for him to make it warm so as he turned towards her, Jenny had to hide all of her thoughts about it all and she rubbed the back ofher neck uncomfortably. "Thanks Matty," she said quietly as she picked up the mug carefully before she brought it up to her lips but didn't take a sip yet, she just watched him with affectionate silence, her awe in him apparent.

 

[Matthew Reed]

Matthew was quite unaware that Jenny was staring at him until he had brought the mug of warm milk to his lips and his eyes wandered over to Jenny who was sitting beside him. He stared back at her waiting for her to say something but when she didn't he quickly looked over his shoulder. Maybe she wasn't staring at him? Was there something else in the room of interest? However when he looked behind his broad shoulder, he didn't see anything that would make Jenny look, the way she was looking at him. Turning back in confusion, Matt stared at Jenny, unable to control taking in every tiny detail of her. "Whats with the face?" He asked, placing his mug down on the countertop which he was sure would leave a stain. He never saw Jenny looking at him like that before, well, maybe he was just only noticing it now? Whatever the reason was, she looked cute when she did it. Or was she aways this cute? His mind wandered off uncontrollably whilst continuing to stare at Jenny, directly in the eye.

 

[Jennifer Wilkonson]

Jenny found herself flustered when Matthew pointed out that she was staring at him. Oh god, what do I say now? she thought nervously as she tried to hide her burning cheeks. "Nothing," she spluttered, knowing that he would pick up the lie, but she couldn't tell him that she wanted so badly to be his, it would ruin everything. "Nothing at all," she sighed softly, wishing that she could tell him the truth and that he would react positively to it but she was just Jennifer Wilkonson and there was simply nothing special about that. "Matty, can I be perfectly honest with you?" she asked, hoping he wouldn't take offense to what she was about to say because she didn't know exactly how fond of the stupid girl he was with.

 

[Matthew Reed]

Matthew raised one of his eyebrows skeptically, it was clear in her tone of voice that she wasn't telling him the truth. Matthew could admit that he knew Jenny pretty well and so he could read her pretty easily, even though reading people wasn't really one of his talents, Jenny was an exception. She always seemed to be an exception. Matthew didn't respond when she said 'Nothing at all', a firm expression remained on his handsome face, he wasn't going to let it slide. Mainly because he was interested but also because he rarely gave up on anything. If he didn't persist as hard as he did, he wouldn't have gotten the record deal. It was down to his persistance that made him the man he was. But it seemed he didn't have to persist, Jenny was ready to spill, "Yeah. Of course." Matt said in one of his more serious tones yet it was welcoming and caring, he tilted his head slightly in interest as he waited for Jenny to explain whatever she had to explain to him.

 

[Jennifer Wilkonson]

"Yeah. Of course." Jenny grinned before rolling her eyes as she began bitterly, "Your girlfriend," before reminding herself that she couldn't and wouldn't let him know about her feelings. "...Is as dumb as a doorknob. I don't know how you are with her or why. You are so much better then she can get." She hadn't meant to slip out the last bit but she nodded her head and stuck with it in the end. "Sorry. No one else was going to say it so I thought I should," Jen excused herself meekly as she went to finally take a sip of her warm milk. As she put the mug down she flashed him a cute smile that he would hopefully accept instead of getting upset with her, which she didn't think he should.

 

[Matthew Reed]

Matthew was taken aback when Jenny burst into this outrage against his girlfriend?! It even took him a couple of seconds to get over the shock and the randomness of the comment. "Hey! How dare you! You have no right to say this when you don't even know her! You don't even know her?!" Matthew found himself getting angrier and a lot more fustrated by the end of the sentence. He shook his head out of pure anger while trying to calm himself at the same time. Matthew looked away from Jenny, in fact he was looking everywhere but Jenny. He knew that him and Kadie weren't exactly perfect for each other but it wasn't like he was planning on marrying the girl. They were just a young couple, having fun? Wasn't that allowed? He couldn't believe Jenny? Why is she so mad? Matthew was still so annoyed that he couldn't bring himself to look at Jenny's eyes, which was odd as literally just a few short minutes ago that was all he could look at.

 

[Jennifer Wilkonson]

Jenny stiffled a laugh at Matthew's over protective stupidity. Kadie was dumb and he was just paying attention to her looks which in her opinion her fake just like the way she had to hide her feelings for Matthew. "Oh Matthew, you're funny," she giggled quietly. "Ask Jess or your parents, they'll tell you the same thing. She isn't the sharpest crayon in the box but what ever, if you like dumb girls who am I to come between that?" she asked rhetorically, knowing that he likely wouldn't understand what she had meant by the last comment because it was simply unexpected. "Matthew, I may not know her but I know you," she added quietly in a more serious tone, hoping that his eyes would return to her gaze.

 

[Matthew Reed]

Matthew looked down at his mug of warm milk and as Jenny continued to speak, his frown turned into a more relaxed and more composed expression. Not reacting until her last comment, Matthew looked up slowly. His gaze struggled to reach her eyes but when it did, he felt calmer as if he couldn't be mad at her for longer then a couple of minutes. Matthew didn't say anything mainly because he had nothing to say. Silence was all that was heard in the kitchen and Matt once more looked away, this time, his diappointed blue eyes stared at the floor. It wasn't that the silence was awkward. It was just empty and Matthew had nothing to fill the spaces with..except, "Why do you care so much?"

 

[Jennifer Wilkonson]

"Why do you care so much?" Jenny looked at Matthew incredulously. Sure he didn't know what she felt for him but he should know that she at least cared for him. "I... I can't tell you," she said defeatedly, then uncomfortably chewed down on her bottom lip. Telling him could have positive sides but she found that her luck with relationships were so horrible and it could bring her to ruin the perfect friendship she had with Matthew.

 

[Matthew Reed]

Matthew waited for Jenny to say something. Something other than, 'I can't tell you'. Did she honestly think that he was going to allow her get away with that? "What is it? Just tell me. You can't just say that and not say anything!" Matthew demanded quickly although his voice was harsh there was a softness in his eyes, that usual glint in his eye sparkled even in the badly lit room. As he waited for her reply, Matthew wondered what it could be that she 'couldn't tell him'? Was it about Kadie? No, she already told you what she thought about her. Matthew reminded himself, still quite bitter over the whole thing. Jess? Why would it be about Jess? The two were best friends, the closest pair of friends he had ever come across. Then...me? Matthew's frantic thoughts came to a direct halt. He couldn't think of a reason why it wouldn't be about him and well, he couldn't really think of any reasons that it would be about him, just the one. Just the very obvious one. Does she have feelings for me?

 

[Jennifer Wilkonson]

Jenny sighed at Matthew's demand and she found it very difficult to respond to it, she most certainly didn't want to because it could ruin everything. But something in his eyes made her realize that he would figure it out one way or another and she might as well tell him herself. "I like you. A lot." Jenn's heart raced and blood rushed to her cheeks as she fiddled with the sleeves of her shirt between her fingers. "But.. You're dating someone else. So it doesn't matter what I feel, right?" she asked rhetorically, hoping that he wouldn't feel uncomfortable about the whole thing because that would just make the rest of this harder then it already was.

 

[Matthew Reed]

Matthew's eyes were fixed on Jenny, his hands rested on his thighs and as he waited for Jenny to tell him what it was, he didn't remember blinking once. However, his still posture changed completely once the words came out from Jenny's mouth. His eyes looked away from hers automatically, his hand moved onto the countertop just for something to do and his mouth formed a small 'o' almost as if to say 'okay?', but he couldn't find his voice. "I like you. A lot." The words repeated in his head over and over again. Matthew didn't know how he felt, what he was feeling. Everything was running riot and he had no control over it. Jenny just confessed that she liked him. Which made perfect sense for a lot of things this night. Being awake at this time, the weird look, the comments about his girlfriend. My girlfriend, Matthew remembered quickly and his heart sunk, guiltily.

Although he didn't do anything or say anything he knew how he really felt. How Jenny seemed to be the only thing he could think of, how conversations were only interesting when she was mentioned in them and how when she was around he did crazily stupid things and said crazily stupid things. And it was because he liked Jenny. Even though he had been trying to convince himself otherwise, the truth remained that he did like her. Maybe even more then she liked him? "Of course it matters! How could it not matter?" Matt blurted out quickly, "I..I mean...you and" Matthew paused out of pure fustration, he couldn't even put a sentence together! ".....since when?" He finally asked her, his great blue eyes seeking hers looking for some sort of answer that would make this situation right.

 

[Jennifer Wilkonson]

Jenny chewed down on her bottom lip anxiously as Matthew silently watched her. Was he going to be disgusted? Oh she didn't want to know, it was all too much. She hated herself for liking Matthew this way, it was just horrible. She felt sick to her stomach, the butterflies she got when she was around him were only intensified and her cheeks were hot and she knew that he could see all this.

"...How could it not matter?" She sighed, Because its me, looking down at the floor, just wishing that it would swallow her up and keep her from hearing any rejection from Matthew. "Since... I don't really know but I guess I figured it out when I was trying to figure out why I kissed you and why I was so offended that you didn't kiss me back," she admitted, looking up into his blue eyes that so so loved. They brought so much comfort to her and she hoped that he would still allow her to be his friend even if he didn't feel the same about her.