Open Loves Me Not

[Lars van Houten]

Lars had kept the rose Elliot had sent him for a little while. Of course he had. He hadn't known what to do with it, as he had ignored the deliverer's stupid suggestion to give it back to the Wild Patch Club. What he should have done was just throw it away, like Elliot had done with his heart. Lars would have preferred nothing over the rose he had gotten. Sorry. What was sorry going to do for him? Was it going to repair his broken heart? His trust? It wasn't. The longer Lars has kept the rose, the more angry he was getting about it. He'd kept it on his nightstand at first, but it had soon been banished to the windowsill. And now, he knew he had to get rid of it. It was nearly dead anyway, and he couldn't keep it forever. Lars had carried it with him out of the common room, heading over to a nearby window. He leaned out a little, looking down onto the lawn with the rose in his hand. He could just... drop it. It would get trampled by some kids on the lawn soon enough. But somehow, that didn't feel like enough. Lars quietly tore a single petal off the rose, letting it float down onto the ground. "He loves me not." He murmured sadly, plucking a second petal and doing the same. His heart constricted at the truth of the words, Elliot didn't love him, and probably had never loved him the way Lars still did.

 

[Avaria Lockwood]

Ava had had a crazy few days. Her head and heart were in turmoil. So when she walked into the common room to see one of Lily's best friends looking forlorn and leaning out a window, she walked over and cuddled up next to him. "Hi, Lars," She greeted softly, laying her head on her shoulder. "Wanna talk about it?" She questioned, looking to the nearly dead flower.

 

[Lars van Houten]

Lars had just plucked the third petal and was crushing it between his fingers before dropping it, when he felt someone suddenly move close to him and settle against him. Lars jumped, looking at the blond girl in alarm. He had thought it was Lily at first, but it wasn't. He knew this girl was her cousin, but Lars had never really spoken to her. He moved aside a little, staring at her for a moment. "No." He mumbled. "Don't... please don't do that." He added, gesturing vaguely, indicating he hadn't appreciated her cuddling up to him out of the blue. "I'm... fine..."

 

[Avaria Lockwood]

Ava pouted a little but nodded, respecting he had boundaries. "No you're not." She argued softly. "I should know, you have the same look I do." She gave him a soft smile. "Someone break your heart, too?"

 

[Lars van Houten]

Lars turned away from the girl a little to look out the window, plucking the next petal off with a little more force. He sighed. "Lily talked to you." He mumbled, knowing Lily had to have known what had happened. "I don't want to talk about it." He added, crushing the next petal between his fingers before throwing it down angrily, watching it drop down onto the lawn after a few moments.

 

[Avaria Lockwood]

Ava shook her head. "No, Lily doesn't tell me about your personal lives." She sat on the windowsill. "She's been teaching me to bake, and we speculate about my dad and her mom." She tucked her hair behind her ear. "You just look the way I did when I was giving away the roses Philip sent me. He didnt even ask, he broke my heart then just showed up with flowers expecting forgiveness."

 

[Lars van Houten]

Lars frowned a little. "Oh." He said, still not looking at the girl as she sat down. He continued plucking petals off the rose, following their trail downward. He didn't want to look at the girl, though her story was familiar to him. Lars swallowed. "Elliot sent me a rose with an apology." He admitted quietly. "After breaking up with me." He added, wincing at his own words. "It's never going to be okay again." He added, crushing what remained of the flower in his hand. "It's never going to be enough."

 

[Avaria Lockwood]

Ava smiled softly, heart aching a little in her chest. "Its okay that it isn't," she said quietly. "He hurt you. He can say whatever he wants, but you're allowed to feel." She twirled a strand of hair around her finger. "Philip was jealous of my best friend and tried to control me. I stomped on his foot and ran away. He said he loved me but that he wouldnt be my 'second choice'," she sneered. "He thinks he can bring me flowers and pretty words and I'll forgive all the bad things he's done." She shook her head. "Don't let anyone tell you what you're allowed to feel," she told Lars with a smile. "You know... I actually am going to be in the north tower after lunch. Why dont you meet me there? I have something that might help," she offered.

 

[Lars van Houten]

Lars shrugged and looked away. Her words were nice, but he didn't know if he needed to hear it from her right now. Her story was different from him, and it strangely made his heart ache even more. "But he came back." He mumbled. "He came back with flowers. If Elliot did that I would forgive him in a second." He swallowed back a sudden sob building in his throat. "But he won't. He didn't even like me, he just thought he did." He whispered, trying to keep himself from crying. "He never liked me, he's never going to try to get me back." Somehow, her story made him feel worse. He knew that whatever that boy had done wasn't good either, but he'd trade it for being dismissed like he was nothing. At least the boy Ava was talking about clearly wanted to be with her, to the point that he was making her choose between her best friend and him. Elliot had been his best friend, but that was in the past too. He swallowed back his tears shakily. "What do you w-want to do there?" He asked, hating the tremble in his voice. "I don't know..." He added. He kind of wanted to hide in his room and cry. At least he was lucky not to be in the same house as Elliot.

 

[Avaria Lockwood]

Ava winced. "Oh, Lars..." She murmured. "I understand that a little, too. Tyler acted like he liked me but he lied. I've been dismissed too." She held up her arm, an offer for a hug. "I can't understand the way you feel. But you have my support if you want it." She gave him a small smile. "I have a huge poster paper. Some ratty old clothes. I've got ten different shades of paint. Im just going to throw paint at it. Sometimes the best way to vent is to let it out."

 

[Lars van Houten]

Lars looked away, a little frustrated as Avaria talked about her own love life again. He was surprised to hear Tyler's name, and shook his head. "You can't compare Tyler to Elliot." He muttered, as upset as he was with Elliot, it was not a comparison Lars could make even in his mind. "Tyler is a terrible person, and he has been for as long as I've known him. The fact that he doesn't like you just reflects well on you." He told her without looking at her. "Elliot is a... wonderful person, but he can't like me as more than a friend." He mumbled, closing his eyes for a moment. The girl's idea sounded fun, but... also tiring. He looked at her uncertainly. "You're going to do that on the north tower?" He asked her quietly.

 

[Avaria Lockwood]

Ava couldn't really argue with Lars about Tyler being terrible. He was. Really, sometimes she was sure every guy she liked was terrible. How did you comfort people when they were heartbroken? She perked up when he seemed at least a little interested in her idea. "I am!" She chirped. "I've also got snacks that Lily made and some drinks and a blanket fort to relax in after, with books to read if the mood hits." She nodded, confident in her plan to chase Philip out of her head. With any luck, maybe Lars would join her.

 

[Lars van Houten]

Lars frowned a little at Avaria's words. It sounded like she had a ton of stuff prepared. "Why... do you have all of that there?" He asked her quietly. "Were you organizing a party?" It sounded like he would be intruding on something Avaria had already planned. He didn't want to be annoying, nor was he sure he would be good company right now. He looked out of the window again, finally just dropping what remained of the rose. His gaze followed it all the way down to the ground. "Why do you care?" He asked her softly.

 

[Avaria Lockwood]

Ava shook her head. "Nope! I always wear myself out when I throw paint so I wanted to be comfy after. It's really cozy." She watched as he dropped a rose out of it. She didn't hesitate when he asked why she cared. "Because you're good," She told him. "You're a good kid, Lars. Lily talks about you sometimes, when I pester her for muffins. She adores you." She reached out, putting a hand lightly on his shoulder for a minute. "We all need someone sometimes. I'm heading up to the towers. I'd really like you to come, even if you think you won't be good company. But I'll also understand if you don't." She smiled. "If you ever need me, I'm here. If you want to talk or paint, or just hang out without saying anything, I can always find time for you."

 

[Lars van Houten]

Lars nodded as Ava explained why she had all of that. It made sense, though it was more prepared than Lars tended to be. He sometimes got so caught up in his paintings that he lost track of time and forgot to eat or drink. Whenever he came out of that, he was always exhausted, but had to drag himself to the great hall for some food when he really wanted to go to bed. He sighed when Avaria mentioned Lily, tensing a little. "Lily is nice." He said vaguely, though he had the feeling their friendship would change now, even if neither of them wanted it to. "I might." He said after a pause. "Thanks for offering." He didn't know why Avaria was so nice to him, but he could appreciate it. Even if he wasn't sure if he deserved it.