Let Me Forget

[Sapphire Michaels]

At first, Sapphire had been oddly delighted to receive Ava's rose. But the longer she looked at it, the worse she felt. It's silken yellow petals, the deep green stem. It reminded her of one she had received at last years dance. And now she couldn't stop thinking of Oliver, but she couldn't bring herself to throw out the rose either. It had been a few days since this year's deliveries and dance. She wasn't exactly sure where she and Mervyn stood right now, but she didn't really want to bring this to him. Still, there were at least three Gryffindors she hoped to see- any of them would have been a sufficient enough distraction.

That didn't mean she had made it up to the Gryffindor tower- not completely, anyway. She had found a window going up the stairs that just seemed to beg for her to sit down. With a deep sigh, she scooted into the large seat, still thumbing the rose. Her dark hair fell to cover her face as she looked out to the bright, sunny day outside the glass. She needed a distraction, desperately. Something, anything to help her forget the stupid Hufflepuff that had so easily left her behind.

 

[Nixon Mercury]

Constantly in an endeavor to practice his photography, Nixon had ascended the grand staircase throughout the day, gradually making his way up and to the seventh floor corridor. The corridor itself was not unlike many of the other corridors in the school with considerably bland stone walls and floors, but the unique selling point to the seventh floor as a place to take photographs was by far the view, which repeatedly convinced him to head to the higher levels of the castle over and over again. The view of the courtyard and grounds from above were breathtaking in their own way, and for some reason to the hufflepuff he thought those areas photographed better from inside the corridors rather than in places like the north tower or owlery. An added addition to why he spent time there was also the chance to run into his friend Jocelynn who was in Gryffindor house. It wasn't an often occurrence to find her in the corridor but there was a possibility which was another reason Nixon liked to spend time there during breaks in his day.

He walked through the corridor with his camera in his hands, looking down to adjust the settings he had memorized as the best ones for that time of day while he headed to one of the windows. So distracted in adjusting the camera settings, Nixon did not realize someone was sitting at his favourite window when he arrived there, let alone that this person was someone he knew from a few random and fleeting encounters around the castle. Though he did notice when he looked up and smiled politely, greeting Sapphire casually as to not bother her from what she was doing. "Oh hey, Sapphire." He said, looking between her and the view outside the window for a moment. "Is it alright if I take a few photos of the view? I won't be too long, it's just one of my favourite places to take photos of the castle grounds." Nixon explained, hoping she wouldn't mind his presence for a few minutes.​

 

[Sapphire Michaels]

Sapphire glanced up, startled at the sound of a boy's voice. She nodded in response to his question and slipped wordlessly from the window. She leaned against the wall, gesturing for Nixon to continue.

If there was one thing that she regretted about cutting her hair, it was that shorter hair didn't hide her face as well. Though, she had to admit she liked the bangs. She turned her head away from her companion, silently hoping he would be caught up enough in his pictures he wouldn't ask questions about the rose in her hand or notice the sadness in her eyes.

 

[Nixon Mercury]

Nixon smiled politely as Sapphire moved from the window and gestured for him to take his photos, uttering a polite "Thanks," to her although the smile didn't quite reach his eyes and the words felt automatic rather than natural. With the familiar view now in front of him, he brought his camera to his face, beginning to capture the sight with the lens. Regardless of the fact he was feeling rushed because he had interrupted Sapphire, he was sure the images would turn out okay, as they always did. When he felt content the view was captured, he stepped back, looking down to the camera momentarily before turning his attention to Sapphire to let her know she could return to the window. "The window's all your-" He paused his words, noticing she didn't seem the same amount of chipper he usually associated with her. Tilting his head to one side, Nixon asked "Are you alright?", as more of a courtesy than anything. It wasn't that he didn't feel genuine concern over Sapphire's melancholic demeanor, but more that he was unsure of how to express this naturally and he felt obliged to react in some way. He knew sometimes asking direct questions could make a problem worse or seem insensitive but had never been emotionally intuitive enough to know when was the right or wrong time, or if asking at all was appropriate.​

 

[Sapphire Michaels]

Sapphire had been thumbing the rose, not really looking at Nixon. He began to speak to her again and she expected him to leave immediately. When he continued, however, she glanced up at the boy from under her bangs. "Hmmm?" It took a moment for her to register what he had said. "Oh..."

She glanced back down at the rose. "Not really. I'll get over it," She shrugged. "It's just that moment when you realize you care about someone a hell of a lot more than they cared about you. Know what I mean?" She glanced up at him again, giving the boy a sad smile. She was pretty sure it was just her- she had a bad habit of pushing away people she cared about. But it still hurt. Did regular kids have this problem?

 

[Nixon Mercury]

Nixon related to Sapphire's words more than he intended to, and the suddenness of it all caught him off guard. With her demeanor being different than usual he had assumed something was bothering her and asked out of obligation, but the last thing he expected was for what she said to ring true to him. First with his parents, his friends, and then more recently with Liam, caring more about others than they cared about him was what Nixon's life seemed to be characterized by. He felt as if he was always vying for the love and affection of people he cared about, in fact he now realized he craved it, only to be met with his feelings being unrequited and never worthy of being returned. The only conclusion he could make from it all was that there was something wrong with him that made him so inexplicably inferior, though something he couldn't begin to figure out if he tried. "It feels awful, huh." Nixon responded, wanting to show that he knew exactly what Sapphire meant but unsure of how to put his feelings into words. "If it helps, I think you deserve better than this person not caring." He added shortly afterwards, gaze moving back to his camera while he spoke. Sapphire deserving better was something he was certain of, and he was confident in saying that because unlike him, there wasn't anything wrong with her that would keep the person she mentioned from returning her feelings. If anything, it was the person that didn't feel the same who had something wrong with them instead.​

 

[Sapphire Michaels]

Sapph scoffed lightly, a half smile on her face. "I appreciate the thought, even if you are wrong. He was a right ray of sunshine. I knew he was going to run off eventually, just..." She looked back down at the rose, twirling it a bit between her fingers. "I just didn't count on how much I wish he woulda stayed." She shrugged. "I'll turn that sentiment of yours back on ya though. Anyone who don't notice what a guy like you is worth has gotta be right daft," She told him softly, not really thinking about what she was saying. If there was one thing about her, it was that she always meant what she said, even if it was because she never stopped to think about it first. She might change her mind later; hell, half the time she didn't know what she really meant and what she didn't.

Sapphire wasn't expecting to feel so vulnerable right now. Had she really cared so much for Oliver that there would be this... ache without him? Why did it ache? Kira said Sapph had a crush on Mervyn. And yeah, Sapph did really like the bloke. But no matter what she thought of the strange Gryffindor, she couldn't seem to shake the Hufflepuff that had, in all appearances, forgotten her. She wrapped her free arm across her ribs. If there was ever a time she wished Onyx was around, it was now. It wasn't often the Slytherin wanted affection but right now, she felt this odd craving to be touched, and held, and she wanted to feel needed, to feel loved. Even if she knew it would never last.

 

[Nixon Mercury]

Nixon listened to Sapphire, although chose to keep his gaze on the camera in his hands as she returned the sentiment of his words back to him. His first thought was to match her scoff and tell her she was the one who was wrong, that she didn't know him well enough to be able to see the flaws he had which seemed to be invisible to him yet so evident enough to others to keep them away no matter how much he tried and wished to be liked. That it was wrong of her to tell him he had any worth when it was obvious to him that he didn't, and his life would be different if he was as worthy as she seemed to think he was. But instead of voicing this he kept silent, wanting to keep the subject on Sapphire and as far away from him as possible. She was the one with the issue after all, he just happened to be strolling the seventh floor corridor at the right time to discover her in the state she was in. It wouldn't make sense to take over a conversation that involved him only by circumstance.​

​

"Whoever this person is, they don't sound like a ray of sunshine if they've left you like this." He eventually said, breaking a short silence he allowed to fall between them. Still he kept his gaze away from her, looking from his camera and out the window in an effort to remove himself from the vulnerability of the conversation that was happening. "Maybe you could focus on the people that are in your life instead. When you think of the bigger picture one person being absent might not seem so bad." There was such an unexpected heaviness in the air and Nixon did not know how he was supposed to act, other than trying to be supportive in a way he was comfortable with, thus the result of saying positive things to Sapphire while in turn visibly distancing himself from her. A person's emotion's were difficult to predict and navigate and he found that being distanced was an easier option compared to getting involved.​

 

[Sapphire Michaels]

Sapphire twirled the rose in her fingers. Maybe Nixon was right. With a soft sigh, she pushed off the wall. She climbed back up into the window. Resigned, she pushed open the window and tossed the rose out. She watched it fall for a moment before she shut the window again. Sapph turned back to Nixon, scooting a bit so she sat on the edge. She offered him a soft smile. "What can I say? The reporter is right again," She brushed her hair out of her eyes.

 

[Nixon Mercury]

Nixon finally moved his gaze from the view from the window, to Sapphire as she threw away her rose. With her words confirming that her problem seemed to be solved and the symbol she might have let go of her issue, or rather the person that was causing this problem in the form of getting rid of the rose, he felt more comfortable keeping eye contact with her. A small smile appeared on his face as he looked at her, relieved the vulnerable air of the conversation was over with and he no longer needed to worry about helping Sapphire feel better. He could hardly process or deal with his own emotions, thus the idea of helping someone with theirs was not one he considered a possibility, but he was relieved this was no longer being asked of him. "I wouldn't say I'm right. I'm just sure you have lots of people who care about you, and it's those people you should be thinking of, not someone who doesn't give you the time of day. They aren't worth the fuss if they don't care back." He wished he could say the same for himself, but did not want to focus on how hypocritical his words sounded as they left his mouth. At least his issue was that no one cared, and all he did have to focus on was getting someone to love him in return. Whereas he was certain Sapphire's situation was inherently different and there was a long list of friends and family in her life who cared about her.​

Out of Character:

Sorry about the wait on this

 

[Sapphire Michaels]

OOC: No worries, lovie

Sapphire snorted, leaning back and propping herself up with her hands. She raised a brow at Nixon, giving him a sly smile. "Suuure, sure, whatever you say, reporter." She teased. "Do me a favor though, if you manage to figure out who all those people are, let me know, yeah? I'm not seeing any." She retorted flippantly, nudging him with her boot. Oliver and Alkander had forgotten her, Lidiya would probably hate her forever, Kira was too wrapped up in her books, her brother was obnoxious and obsessed with the idea she was something more than she was, and Mervyn was never going to see her as more than an annoying kid. Not that she bothered saying any of that out loud. Nixon was kinda cute when he smiled and far be it from her to mess with it by being down.

 

[Nixon Mercury]

The air of the conversation had definitely changed and Nixon immediately felt more comfortable. Talking about difficult subjects in a light hearted way was definitely preferable for him, keeping him from feeling overwhelmed and concerned he would say the wrong thing at the wrong time, or worrying that if he said anything about his own reality Sapphire would never speak to him again. At least in the process of joking he could brush off a comment if it was taken in the wrong way and save what little dignity he had left. "For my next story, I'll interview your friends and family, just to find out they care even more than you expect." He said, chuckling. The hogwarts monthly would probably never run such a story, but that didn't mean he couldn't pretend as if they would for Sapphire's sake. "If it helps, I'll say I care about you." He added. "Probably doesn't mean much 'cause we don't know much about each other, but if it helps I can tell you that." Nixon shrugged, unsure of this was what he should be saying or if his words in a joking way would come across as insensitive. He and Sapphire did not know each other as well as they probably should have so whatever sense of caring Nixon had wouldn't be comparable to one of Sapphire's family members, and he knew this, but if it kept her from wallowing over someone that did not give her the time of day he was willing to play it up a little.​

 

[Sapphire Michaels]

Sapphire laughed at Nixon's insistence. "Well, that's one obnoxious brother, a reporter that'll dance for a story, and the Ravenclaw that lives in the library." She grinned widely. "If you can convince them to run a two-paragraph story on something as boring as that, tell you what." She winked playfully. "I'll kiss you." She paused a second, realizing that he might not like the idea. "Or," She amended after a split second, "I'll let you have my suckers stash." She decided with a nod. "That's a better prize."

 

[Nixon Mercury]

Nixon knew from the beginning the monthly wouldn't want to run a story like that and that he wouldn't waste his breath suggesting it, so the offer of a kiss if he did manage to get the story published was impossible. He shrugged at Sapphire's words then chose to admit the truth thinking it wouldn't be an issue if he played it off as a joke, and assuming that Sapphire probably would not want a story like that in the paper anyway. If someone wrote a story about him in such a manner he would have buried his head in the sand and insisted on changing schools to get rid of the embarrassment. He couldn't imagine anyone else would act different and want a story about the people that cared about them immortalized in print for everyone to see. "I wont ever get a kiss then, or your sucker stash, because the monthly wouldn't run a story like that, how heartbreaking." Nixon joked, chuckling a little as he looked out the window again. He wondered for a moment if someone had actually managed to run a story on a student in the past that was outside the standard set of interviews in each article. It was weird to imagine, but he was tempted to look up past issues and find out.​

 

[Sapphire Michaels]

Sapphire let out a dramatic sigh. "Well, it looks like my dignity- and my sweet tooth, was saved for another day," She snickered. "That's a relief," She joked, running her hand through her hair. "I don't know what we'll ever do about that broken heart." She teased him, a sly smile on her face. "My suckers aren't good treatment, of course. We'll need something else. What would you like as a consolation prize?" She smiled, her mind racing.