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Alex Cullen

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Wand
Rowan Wood 12"1/4 Essence of Silver Thistle
Alex sighed as he jogged to the cliffs. He was sore all over as he thought back to the fight him and James had had a week ago. That guy had strength but he didn't have the agility and speed Alex had. Alex had only just managed to survive with the dodges he could pose. Otherwise, he would of been dead meat. As he got to the bare patch of ground without the grass, he stopped and clutched his side that was proving to be a bad stitch.
Alex pouted before sitting down. The bruises still covered his body and face though they weren't as bad as they were straight after the fight, they still managed to get him the looks from the other guys. The kind of looks when they thought you were a wimp. He hated it and this is why he came here. Quiet. Kiera was so right when she said it was a good place to clear your thoughts.
Alex's thoughts then trailed to Kiera. The one who had started this whole thing. His head rested against his arms that rested against his knees. Maybe he shouldn't have done a two-mile run today. Maybe he had pushed it a bit too much this time.
 
Kiera was out jogging in the autumn air. She had a long-sleeve athletic shirt on with tight leggings. Kiera had been running everyday since the morning after the tower. She tended to over exercise when she was upset and trying to keep her mind off a topic. Kiera needed her daily run to keep her sanity. She hadn't seen Alex since that morning, though she had looked for him several times. Her only thought was that he must be ignoring her, which upset her. Graduation had come and passed and now they only had exams before the school year ended. Kiera did not want to leave school without working things out with Alex.

Kiera tried desperately to keep her thoughts off Alex and James as she ran through the Gardens, around the Lake, and finally towards the Cliffs. As if by fate, Kiera spotted the all too familiar boy on the Cliffs. Alex Cullen. Kiera slowed to a walk as she debated what to do. She wanted to go to him but was unsure of how he would react. Kiera's heart pulled her to him. It was warmed by the sight of his face. Kiera sank down onto the grass beside Alex. She gasped. What had happened to him? He looked as if he had been run over by a tractor truck! Concern lit up her face. "What happened?" as all she could get out of her mouth.
 
Alex had nearly almost fallen asleep when the sound of a voice wok him out of semi-consciousness. He looked up to find Kiera sitting next to him. He smiled, holding his hand up, as if blocking the sun from hitting it but really just to hide the bruises and cuts as much as he could. He felt ashamed to sit there when Kiera could see him like this. After all, he was a wimp. No one could deny that. His old girlfriend had gotten bored of him for a while.
He sighed. 'Nothing much. Just you know, two people having different opinions,' he didn't feel like telling anything to Kiera about James and him fighting. It wasn't really something he felt like doing to be honest. James should be here saying it instead, not him. She would probably guess though.
 
Kiera narrowed her eyes suspiciously at Alex. "Differing opinions?" she asked. She had a feeling she knew who had those differing opinions. Kiera sighed and closed her eyes. This was all her fault. Kiera almost wished the ground would open up and swallow her. She didn't know what to do anymore, but she knew she couldn't stay away from Alex any longer. Kiera opened her eyes and looked at Alex. Her chocolate brown eyes sparkled in the sunlight. "This is all my fault. I know it." she said, voicing her earlier thoughts. Kiera felt horrible at what she had put Alex through. She was slightly surprised he hadn't just got up and left. Kiera did not think Alex could ever forgive her for what she did. No matter how much she wanted him to.
 
Alex sighed. He didn't bother not say it was her fault. But it wasn't all her fault. It was his fault. 'It's not all your fault you know.' he told her soothingly. He didn't want her feeling guilty for his stupid actions. He took one more look at her before looking back over the cliff. His arm was aching from holing up over his face so long, he needed to rest it. He was glad he was wearing a long sleeved top though and jeans. If she saw the bruises that were on his body, and she thought the ones on his face were bad, she'd certaintly be annoyed.
'Listen, Kiera. You've probably guessed what happened already but honestly, I'm sorry I shouted at you before. I should of waited till I spoke to him before accusing anything of you,' he told her, still not facing her though.
 
Kiera looked at him dubiously as he told her in a soothing voice that it wasn't all her fault. Kiera could hardly believe her ears. How could it not be all her fault? He hadn't done anything wrong. Kiera shook her head slightly. "No, it really is." she said softly, looking at the ground. As he lowered his arm, she got a good look at his face. It was not good at all. She wondered how the rest of his body looked if his face was this bad. Her guilt increased, knowing there had to be more bruises.

Alex was too good to be true. Here he was, being perfectly wonderful to the girl that cheated on him. He was apologizing to her! That was completely backwards! Kiera wanted to look Alex in the face. She wanted to see his eyes and read his emotions. She had no idea what he was thinking. "I guess you fought with James." she said knowing her assumption was correct. "Don't be sorry. I deserved it." she said with a sinking feeling in her stomach.
 
Alex tutted once as she guessed he fought with James. 'If you can call him that. More like a lethal machine,' he thought aloud, before realizing he had just done that. He shut his mouth up, wincing as Kiera said she deserved it. He liked her so much still, and for her to say that was like a knife slicing through his heart again.
He shook his head. 'Kiera. He was the one who kissed you first. Any sane person wouldn't try and kiss you once you've told them you have a boyfriend. Geez, even I wouldn't have done that if I was him and he was me,' he replied before sighing. Why was he even bothering with this? It was obvious she didn't want to be with him.
 
Kiera's face turned distrustful as he said that James was a lethal machine. Alex had been hurt more than he let on. "How bad is it really?" she said, the guilt of what she had done to him continuing to wash over her. Kiera wondered why Alex winced when she said it was her fault. Because it was her fault that she caused him pain. Kiera shook her head. Why was he so perfect? Kiera longed to be in Alex's arms, but that was no longer possible. It was only hurting her to imagine it as a possibility. Kiera shook her head at his reply. "I could have left. I should have left. It shouldn't be like this." she said, avoiding his eyes. "Its my fault that we aren't together. I can't change the way it is now, even though I want to." she said softly.
 
Alex laughed. 'Trust me Kiera. It's not as bad as HE is, honestly,' he replied, just stating the truth. It was an even match between them practically, until James got the control with Alex against the corridor wall. He had wondered how he had gotten there to be honest. They had met each other in the class room.
He closed his eyes as he listened to Kiera apologizing. Why did she act so guilty-sounding? Well, maybe she should be feeling that but he was no grudge holder and sighed. 'Mistakes teach lessons and lessons lead lives. And I don't care to be honest anymore Kiera. and I'm actually sorry to be putting you on the guilt trip right now as well. Didn't mean that too happen either,' he replied before resting his forehead against his arms. He was so tired today.
 
Kiera snuck a peek at Alex as he said James was worse off. She was concerned for James but not as much as she was for Alex. She knew James had a good bit of knowledge with healing spells. He would be fine. Alex was the one Kiera was concerned with, though she thought it was better not to voice her opinion. She didn't know how he would react to her feelings. Kiera listened to Alex talk and say he didn't care. Kiera's heart dropped. She took that as a sign he no longer cared for her either. She sat in silence for a moment before responding.

"Well I made a mistake that cost me the best boyfriend and I can't change that. How am I not supposed to feel bad?" Kiera asked, looking out over the cliffs. "You're not putting me on a guilt trip." she told him honestly. "I have been on a guilt trip for the last few weeks." she said quietly.
 
Alex sighed. He couldn't imagine what she was going through tis now. He was feeling horrible and unwanted almost but she was probably ten times worse. He turned his memory back a few months to just before the yule ball. This was the place their relationship started. Right on the cliffs but of course, he hadn't been the sullen one then. She had.
And of course, he had been the one who was complaining about the silence. But now he was welcoming it gladly. Except for one thing. Her voice. He was glad she was here, just so he could hear her voice after so long without hearing it. He pictured her smiling face in his head, not willing to turn to face her just yet. He wouldn't make this any harder than it was already.
He wished she would just ask him to come back though. It was obvious she didn't want him anymore more but he craved for her. To be with her in his arms at this very moment. But that would be stupid, taking in mind the circumstances. He would just have to get over her like he had with Nina.
 
Kiera didn't know what to do in the silence. Alex didn't speak to her and she didn't know if he even wanted to. He wasn't even looking at her. She felt as though her heard had been ripped in two and he carried part of it. She was distraught at what she should do. James was out of the picture now. Kiera and James had agreed to be just friends a few days earlier out on the pitch. He would be in London.

There was only one person she wanted now and he was sitting beside her. Kiera was afraid to look at him. She was afraid she would see an uncaring look in his eyes. She knew she couldn't face that. She remember how happy the two of them had been together, before she threw it all away. This was the place where it had started, their relationship. Kiera wished she could go back to that day. Everything had been so easy and carefree. Kiera knew she had to say something to Alex. Anything. "I miss you." she said, almost a whisper. She didn't know what else to say.
 
Alex was almost begging for her to speak again. He didn't like this silence. It was just uncomfortable and awkward but it just helped to convince himself that Kiera probably didn't want to speak to him in the end. He just rested his head there, not moving much at all until he heard her.
His thoughts poured in at once. In two sides, one saying she was lying and just trying to get sympathy and the other urging him to reply with me too phrase. Alex opened his eyes and stared out of glazed over eyes not sure what to say anymore.
'Is that the truth?' he asked quietly, hoping she wouldn't take it the right way. He was just being careful now. There was no way he was going to open up that fast to her again. Who knew how long it had happened between her and any other boy in the castle? He knew he was bad for thinking that, but it was true. There was always an element of doubt in him now.
 
Kiera waited for his reply, afraid of what he would say to her. She felt sure he would shun her, not matter what her feelings were. Kiera didn't think she would be able to keep it together if he said he no longer cared for her. But what if that was the truth? Kiera glanced at him as he asked her if that was the truth. Kiera's eyes showed confusion. Why would she subject herself to the rejection if it was a lie? Kiera knew as soon as she looked in his eyes that it would be rejection. They were cold to her, something she had never seen in Alex.

Kiera waited a moment before replying. She took in a deep breath, preparing herself for the pain she knew was coming. This would be the final shattering of her heart. "I wouldn't say it if it wasn't true." she said, looking back at him.
 
Alex waited for the reply anxiously. He would accept it if she said it was a lie. That was simple but he didn't want it to be like that. He wanted it to be true. Of course, the whole selfishness of that made him want to but he as allowed some selfishness every once in a while.
A smile broke on his face as she said it was true. He turned to face her not bothering to hide his face this time. He just had to face her again. 'Really?' he asked her, care filling his eyes. 'Coz I missed you too,' he added, in a quieter voice. He hoped for the sake of his heart that she hadn't been joking with him.
 
Kiera waited, holding her breath scorn was surely coming from him. Only, she wouldn't blame him. It would be fair if he did hate her now. Kiera bit her lip as she watching him, trying to guard her heart. When he turned back to her, he had a smile on his face and his eyes were no longer distant to her. Kiera froze as he said he missed her too. The shock of his words was written across her face. Kiera opened her mouth to speak but no words came out. This was impossible! Kiera hoped this wasn't all a mean joke. She couldn't help but smile back at him. "You missed me? Really?" she asked incredulously. "I thought you were avoiding me." she told him, knowing he still could have been avoiding her.
 
Alex waited for her reaction but it was one he wasn't expecting. Shocked was coming to him and he frowned slightly but the smile remained. He squirmed slightly as she said he thought he was avoiding him. In a sense, he had been, but it was mostly for her own good. He didn't want her to see him when he had been worse than he had been now. Not too mention the fact that she probably didn't want to see him in his mind. 'I thought you were avoiding me,' he replied, before sighing. Maybe he was the one who had been stupid now...
 
Kiera notice his squirming. So she was right. He had been avoiding her. Kiera's mouth dropped as he said he thought she had been avoiding him. Why on earth would she want to avoid him? Kiera might have feeling for James but it was Alex who had her heart. He was the one who made her laugh and relax when she was upset.
"I wasn't avoiding you. I could never do that. I like you too much for that." she said honestly. Kiera could feel her heart slowly mending itself.
 
Alex bit his lip. He had been thinking so much and doubting his girlfriend, he had not taken in the basic facts. Now he was taking a trip on the guilt trip. He should never of doubted her so much and blaming her for cheating that made him like that was nonsense. And practically unacceptable in his mind as far as he could see.
'Well...umm...I'm stupid. I thought you didn't anymore. Sorry, really I am. Am I forgiven?' he asked her, wondering if he was now as bad as the guys the girls used to fear. He hoped not.
 
Kiera's jaw dropped once more as he said he was was stupid and then asked to be forgiven. Kiera couldn't believe her ears. What did he have to be forgiven for? Everything was her fault, though none of it seemed to matter anymore. A smile broke across her face. "Really? You're asking me to forgive you?" she said with a laugh at the irony. "I'm the one who needs forgiveness." she mused. Kiera wrapped her arms around Alex in a hug before she thought about what she was doing. He still might not want her that close to him. Kiera pulled back and blushed. "There isn't anything to forgive." she told him honestly.
 
Alex looked at her before grinning wider. 'But you're already forgiven,' he replied sullenly. How could she not noticed that already. He winced slightly in pain as she hugged him though it didn't matter. At least he knew he was forgiven. And the closeness was welcomed greatly by him.
'Hmm, you wish,' he replied to her comments. Girls never thought of anything before they spoke did they. He took her hand and traced it with his hands, not sure if she would want him kissing her yet. As much as he wanted too, he wondered if his heart was ready for it again yet. He smiled at her, just watching her.
 
Kiera was finally hopeful. He had told her she was forgiven. He had to be the best guy in the world to forgive her betrayal. Maybe everything was going to be okay...how could it not be with Alex smiling at her like he was? She smiled back at him. "I know it." she replied simply to his you wish. Kiera's skin prickle as he picked up her hand. She loved the closeness. Kiera had missed him terribly. Only one uncertainty remained. "So where does that leave us?" she asked, wondering.
 
Alex smiled as she said she knew it. He would of laughed but his mood wasn't quite his usual yet. It would still take a while before his pride was mended properly. He wasn't the likely person to be with a lot of friends right now. Losing your girlfriend wasn't the best thing to happen at all. He shrugged as she asked him something though.
He honestly didn't know. 'Friends? Or maybe just taking it back to the start and working it up again. You tell me,' he answered, not sure. The uncertainty was pretty clear in his voice. He didn't know if they would ever get back to what they were like before but he censerely(sp?) hoped they would be able to do that.
 
Kiera held her breath as she waited for his answer. She hoped things could go back to the way they had been but she knew that was not very likely. Kiera could hear the uncertainty in Alex's voice. Kiera couldn't tell which option he preferred. Kiera looked up and into Alex's eyes. She felt peace there. "Can we try again?" she asked him. Now it was her turn to be uncertain. One thing she did know was that she would never cheat on him again.
 
Alex looked into Kiera's eyes. He saw the pleading almost in them and wasn't sure. 'I think we could,' he replied, before giving her a crooked smile. It was almost a laughing matter. Two teenagers talking this out like a pair of old grown-ups. He would never of believed he could be this serious unless he was here right now.
But he was glad he was here. Or else Kiera and him might've not come to this conclusion between them.
 
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