Thinking things over

[Lily Drage]

Lily felt bad. She had been avoiding her boyfriend for a few weeks now. She felt so guilty over what happened between her and Ford in the library that she couldn't stand it. She was sick of being up in the tower where she had holed up for a while now, that she decided to get out and take a walk. Heading up to the cliffs, she found a nice quiet spot and settled down. She needed some time to think and sort herself out, get back on track with her life.

The spot she was in overlooked the drop off. The trees were changing colors and the weather was a bit chilly. Lily had made sure to grab her hoodie, and was happy that she had. She took it out of her messenger bag and put it on, slipping it up over her head and pushing her arms through. She settled back on the ground, leaning against the tree. Closing her eyes, Lily focused on breathing deeply in and out, trying to relax and clear her head.

 

[Blake Zepline]

What was going on? Blake asked himself for what seemed like the trillionth time that day. With his head hanging low, hands deep in his pockets and his footfalls resounding heavily with the crush of autumn leaves, Blake trudge up the slope of the hill that lead to the drop-off. The only conclusion Blake had drawn from Lily's peculiar behavior lately, was that something was terribly wrong. Perchance Lily was losing interest in him? Or rather she was beginning to find interest in someone else? Whatever the more likely explanation, Blake sensed the oncoming slaughter of a break up.
Sending a rock skidding up the hill with his right foot, Blake inhaled deeply. Lily was the only girl he had ever felt so strongly for, and he couldn't imagine not having her as his girlfriend. There was a time when he could never have doubted her feelings for him too, but that felt so long ago, and he felt a different boy now. If there was a way to fix whatever was wrong, Blake would have given his right arm.
"Lily?" Blake blurted as he came to a stop before the tree under which she sat.
He hadn't seen her face in what felt like forever, but she was still as beautiful as he remembered. His heart slammed heavily against his chest, and the rush of fear crashed over him. This was it; she was going to break up with him. For all the life of him, Blake couldn't remember ever feeling as scared and hopeless as he did now...

 

[Lily Drage]

Lily jumped as she heard a voice say her name. Her eyes popped open quickly, taking in the person in front of her. "Blake?" she said, just above a whisper. She was shocked that of all people, her boyfriend was the one that found her out here. She stood quickly, closing the distance that was between them. As she threw her arms around him, she chastised herself in her mind. How could she have been so stupid as to fall for Ford's advances?

The guilt was eating her up inside, but she needed to think this through a bit more before she talked that over with Blake. She never had feelings for anyone the way she did for Blake, seeing him there reminded her of that fact. She loved this man in front of her. Not Ford, not anyone else. Just Blake. She crushed her face into his chest, doing her best to hold back the tears that threatened to spill over. "I've missed you."

 

[Blake Zepline]

Blake had been completely taken aback as Lily rushed into his arms. He had been so prepared for a reaction to the contrary. In confusion, Blake slowly wrapped his arms around Lily and found that he had missed her so much more than he had believed. His insides ached and his heart throbbed in uneven beats, and before he could stop himself, tears were pouring from his dark green eyes. Hearing her say she missed him made him soar, and yet he couldn't ignore the underlying problem that something was still terribly wrong.
But his physical desires seemed to outweigh his emotional ones. Lifting Lily off her feet, Blake held her in his arms and pressed his lips against hers. He had gone so long without this, and was only just beginning to feel the full pain of the past weeks loss. Setting Lily on her feet again, Blake took a step back to try and evaluate the situation.
"Lily... I'm so confused. Lately I've been under the impression that you... that you wanted to break up with me." Blake's voice was uneven, but he tried his best to keep the tears at bay. Turning away from Lily momentarily, Blake let the wind ruffle his long hair as he wiped his face dry. "I just don't understand what's going on with you anymore... what's going on with us..."

 

[Lily Drage]

Lily was elated as Blake picked her up and kissed her on the lips, then felt the misery that had descended upon her as of late return when he turned from her. The tears that had threatened to flow when Blake arrived overflowed her eyes now as she listened to him speak. "You think I want out?" she whispered, just loud enough for Blake to hear. "Blake, I-- I know I have been a bit off lately. That we have been a bit off, but I don't want to lose you." She moved forward to wrap her arms around his waist and bury her face against his back. "I have just been having a really hard time dealing with some stuff lately, stuff that I still am not able to figure out yet." Taking a deep breath, she continued. "I'm sorry, Blake." The tears started to fall harder down her face and she began to come close to sobbing. "I don't want to lose you, but if you don't want-- don't want to be with me---" Her voice trailed off as Lily began to sob. She didn't want to break up with Blake, but she also knew deep down she would have to tell him what she did and she was just not ready for that yet.

 

[Blake Zepline]

Blake heard Lily's voice falter, and within a second, his arms had closed around her again. "Of course I don't want to break up with you..." he replied, as though the idea was as insane as saying pigs fly. "I've missed you more than I can express, and seeing you again has only reminded me of that. If anything, I was prepared for the onslaught of you breaking up with me. But... I'm so glad you aren't." Blake tucked a lose strand of hair behind Lily's ear, wiping her face dry of tears. "Don't cry. I would never leave you," he promised. "Well, not unless you made out with another guy. Or worse; a girl," Blake teased, knowing his Lily would never betray him like that. He loved her so much, and as he began thinking about what he had just said, well... he found that he probably would forgive her for something like that. That was how much he loved her, and how unwilling he was to let her go, even at the expense of his heart unbroken.

 

[Lily Drage]

Lily felt a wave of relief wash over her when Blake said he didn't want to break up. As his arms encircled her once more, she felt another wave of tears flow, tears of joy. Her heart dropped out of her chest when she heard Blake mention kissing another guy. That was exactly what she had done, and now he brought the subject up. She was no where near ready to confess to him what she had done. Not yet anyways. She knew eventually she would have to, but now was not the time.

Flinging her arms up around his neck, she decided to tease him back just a bit. He was the one who brought up the idea of kissing a girl after all. "Well, you know, there was this one crazy night in the girls dorm...." She then stuck her tongue out at her love, hoping that she would be able to move past the incidents of the past and create a future with the man before her.

 

[Blake Zepline]

Blake chuckled. "Now that I'm envisioning it, it might not be something too bad at all, you kissing a girl." Blake paused a second, "Well, actually. If it was Estrella, then I think I would definitely mind. She's practically my sister, come to think of it." Blake grimaced. Last summer Josh had mentioned that his goddaughter was Estrella Drage, the Head Girl at HNZ. It was shocking at first, but after a while it was old news.

 

[Lily Drage]

"Well, you do realize who I share a room with, don't you?" Lily replied, batting her eyes and starting to laugh. She was starting to fall back into the easy conversation that they always had between them. "No, to be honest, I have no desire to kiss a girl when I can kiss the most amazing man in the world." To prove her point, she stood up on her toes, kissing Blake fully on the lips.

 

[Blake Zepline]

Blake kissed Lily back for as long as was allowed by the general school rules. He missed the freedom they had over the Christmas break on the beach. They had almost gone a bit too far but he was more disappointed.
"You'll spend summer with me and Josh, won't you?" Blake asked, a little too eagerly. He loved Lily so much, and she was the only person he ever wanted to do that with, assuming she wanted to with him too. Smiling, Blake lifted Lily off her feet again and began twirling around. Oh how he had missed this.

 

[Lily Drage]

Lily felt like she was in heaven as she kissed Blake. She loved him and no one else. Still mentally kicking herself for what she had done, she soon found herself breathless and unable to think at all. Christmas had been amazing and she was elated when Blake asked her to come home with him again for the summer. "Of course! I love spending my holidays with you and Josh." Kissing him again, she felt Blake lift her off the ground and spin her. All thoughts of Ford were wiped from her mind and replace with thoughts of summer romance and the beach -- and the possibilities that it held.