Cause for Celebration

[Monty Pendleton]

When Monty had applied for the Head of House vacancy, he'd had not the slightest idea he would instead become Hogwarts's new Deputy Headmaster. Even later that evening, when he returned home to tell Saveli the news, he still hadn't managed to wrap his head fully around the turn of events. Deputy Head! It was a responsibility he'd neither anticipated nor prepared for, and amid his excitement, there churned a significant amount of nerves. What if he was not cut out for the job? Head of House would have been difficult to adapt to, but this was beyond any challenge he'd imagined. Still, in spite of his apprehension, he was timidly proud, almost afraid to allow himself the sense of achievement, or to dare that he might have done something to warrant it. To have been chosen for the role was a privilege for which he did not know if he was worthy.

It was dark when the Potions professor arrived home, and, with any luck, Ainmere was already sleeping. Monty let himself in and hung his jacket up, venturing into the living room to find Saveli. She had been waiting as anxiously as he to hear who had become Ravenclaw's new Head of House, so he decided to mess around for a moment. "I, uh - I didn't get it," he said, trying to look disappointed, but unable to fight the grin from his face for more than a few seconds. "But I am the new Deputy Head."

 

[Saveli Pendleton]

The evening was long when Monty wasn't home. Ainmere had been colicky the majority of the day, and no matter what Saveli did the poor blonde couldn't quite get her settled. That was until a little later in the evening, around seven in the evening. Saveli had known that Monty's first day back would be nerve wracking. They'd spoken at length about his application for Ravenclaw Head of House, and Saveli had encouraged her father as much as she could to be open and be brave. She knew he was brave deep down - but some decisions were hard. Saveli had begun to sort her wash in the living room, packing maternity clothing as she was doing so hoping she'd not need them again ever - or at least until Ainmere was in school. It was there that Monty found her, Ainmere in her crib upstairs, baby monitor on in case of any disturbances.

When Monty walked into the room Saveli stood, her face split with a large smile, knowing that her father was the best for the position they were offering. However at his first words the Irish woman was shocked and angered. "Are you kidding me? That batty c***..." Saveli trailed off at the end of her sentence though when a smile appeared on Monty's face. He'd been messing with her. In fact, he'd gotten her so well that she was floored with his next statement. Crossing the room quickly she swatted Monty's arm and then wrapped her own around him. "I'm so proud of you dad! i knew you could do it! you're going to be so great! Just don't go bringing back any stray kids unless you want to have to go through this again!" She waved at the boxes with her wand, moving them to the side and gesturing to them at the same time. She had been packing slowly for her move, a little reluctant and nervous of the future.

"I have a surprise!" She said before letting go and bouncing into the kitchen to grab the wine she'd bought for the occasion, considering how much faith she had in Monty. The two bottle of white wine were held up on either side of her head with a grin on her face. "To celebrate!" She insisted.

 

[Monty Pendleton]

Monty recoiled a little at Saveli's aggressive outburst, but soon reduced into laughter. He hugged his daughter back, her words bringing tears to his eyes, though he fought to suppress the sudden flood of emotion. "Well, the house will be awfully quiet when you've gone," he jested, glancing sadly at the boxes stacked up around the room. Though Monty spent much of his time and the castle, and would be spending even more of it there now that he was Deputy, he still couldn't imagine his house without Saveli in it, and the thought of her leaving to live with Reuben nearly threatened the tears to resurface. He was happy for her, of course, and immensely proud, but he hadn't expected her to leave so soon, and the suddenness of it all was jarring.

Raising an eyebrow, Monty followed Saveli into the kitchen, curious to see what sort of surprise she had in store for him. Seeing the bottles of wine, he laughed. He didn't keep any alcohol in the house, which meant Saveli had gone out in advance to the good news to purchase some. She had more faith in him than he'd had in himself. "That is incredibly sweet," he said, "but I don't think I'll make much of an impression on Professor Alicastell if I turn up hungover on my first day." He shook his head. "One glass. Have we anything for dinner, or shall I order in?" The perks of living in a muggle neighbourhood were numerous.

 

[Saveli Pendleton]

When Monty laughed rather than scolding her for her use of foul language, Sav was pleased. She had been very good through most of her time with Monty, not swearing as much as she had wanted to. However being around Roo and having freedom when Monty wasn't in the house had lent to the relearning of bad habits. The blonde heard Monty's jest and her own heart fell slightly. This house was the closest to a home she'd ever had. Monty was the closest to a real dad as well, leaving it behind was going to be a trial. However she knew she had to move into the future at some point. She knew it would be better if she did. She could always return to Monty whenever needed, but she had to be an adult now, she had a baby to think of. "You'll enjoy it most days." She finally responded with a gentle curve of her lips denoting that while it was a hard truth, it was a truth in her mind.

Saveli popped open the first bottle, pouring some into a glass, Monty's more full than hers. Saveli had never drank before, she wasn't sure what to expect when she did either. She then reached behind her for the phone, which she'd left in their earlier after speaking with Viviana, whom was staying with Keeva for a few days. She'd yet to talk to Monty about allowing her time there while she sorted out where to stay next, or her parents came back from vacation. "Listen, hungover-schmongover - I won't get you that drunk." She laughed, before calling a Chinese take out place nearby and ordering in.

When the food arrived and Monty adn Saveli had had their fill, the blonde on her second half glass, she decided to ask her father some questions - now that they'd discussed his position. "So are you excited then? They're moving your office right?" She asked, remembering vaguely that the deputy had an office not in the dungeons.

 

[Monty Pendleton]

Monty wondered if Saveli really thought he would enjoy the house without her. Once upon a time, he'd valued his space and his privacy so highly that he'd scarcely have opened his curtains, let alone invited somebody to live with him. Saveli had changed that. Because of her, he'd realised the importance of family, and learned to share his space and tolerate the invasion of privacy. Now he didn't want her to leave. He had no plans to foster again, though he suspected one day the circumstances might arise that he should want to, but nobody would ever, ever replace Saveli. Still - it wasn't as if they would never see one another again. He would visit, and he hoped that she and Reuben would visit him from time to time, too.

Monty stuck firmly to his word, still only half way through his first and only glass of wine by the time they'd finished dinner. He sipped it slowly as he sat on the sofa, feet tucked up underneath him. "Yes," he said, with a nod. "It's odd; I've always complained about my office in the dungeons, but I think I'll miss spending most of my time there." The professor trailed off, a plaintive look coming over his face. He was excited - there was no doubt about that - which only made the lingering feelings of sadness more confusing. He sighed. "You... you do think I did the right thing, don't you? I mean, in taking the job. I just... I worry that I'm not ready for this sort of responsibility. What if I can't do it? What if I make a fool of myself in front of the Headmistress? Maybe - maybe I should have turned it down. I don't know..."

 

[Saveli Pendleton]

Saveli was not drunk by any sense of the word, but her cheeks were a faint blush color and her nose red as well. She was sat across from him and toyed with the rim of her glass for a moment while he talked. "You sure you don't want another glass?" She asked, swishing the liquid around as if to tempt Monty into loosening up a little. After all, the small buzz Sav had going had completely dispelled her stress from preparing to move out of her home. "I hated your office in the dungeon at first." She spoke, agreeing with him. "But then it was easy to find you when I needed you in school." She remarked with a small smile. It had been close to her house, so when she and Gabriel fought, or when she needed to study away from everywhere else - or even if she wanted tea with Monty, she was able do so on a whim.

At the question posed next to the Slytherin Alumni, Saveli cocked her eyebrow. "Dad." She replied calmly, setting her glass to the side and nearly tipping it over from diminishing depth perception. Catching it she sat it up right and faced him. "You are going to make mistakes, there are going to be things you don't know how to do. But at the end of the day it's okay to make those mistakes and learn. You took a position that could help you help these kids, Monty. They're going to see you when things are hard, and look up to you - and you are perfect for that. You are such a good role model, I mean I turned out way better right?" She laughed. "Dad, you're going to be amazing. You made the right choice. And at the end of the day, you know that ,somewhere deep underneath your worry of not being good enough." Saveli's philosophical speakings were partially from always feeling like she shouldn't give him advice and bottling up the way she felt about Monty - and partially the wine. Regardless she meant every word.

 

[Monty Pendleton]

Monty nodded, setting his glass down on the coffee table and leaning back into the cushions on the sofa. He didn't particularly like to drink at home - and he wasn't far off suggesting Saveli took it easy, either. To hear that Saveli had also appreciated the location of his office made the professor sigh once more. The problem was, he knew he liked his dungeon office for all the wrong reasons: it was isolated, far away from the rest of the school - a place he could escape to when things became overwhelming. As Deputy, that wouldn't be possible any more. He couldn't run away when things got hard. And that was a challenge he didn't know if he was ready to face.

The role model talk was enough to make Monty well up, but it was the bit about his fear of not being good enough that caused those tears to fall. Part of him wanted to believe Saveli was right; the other part couldn't see past his doubt and anxiety. How could running away at the first hint of trouble possibly set a good example to the children? What could they possibly look up to in him? He shook his head, prompting several more tears to slip down his face. "I don't - I can't - I'm not the sort of role model they need," he said, wiping at his cheek. "When I was twenty or so, I started training to become an Auror. I've always said if asked that I quit, but that isn't true - I failed. After two years, I failed, because... I don't know - I panicked. I couldn't perform. I knew I was a good wizard; I practised every day, in my own time, and never had the slightest bit of trouble. But the minute I was put under any sort of pressure, I panicked, and I couldn't do it. Everything I'd learned, just... vanished. So I failed." Monty had never admitted this to anybody before, and he was shaking in fear of judgement. "I felt so awful for so long, I refused to try anything new for fear of repeating myself. I know Deputy Head and Auror are two very different occupations, but I'm still scared, Sav. I don't want to fail again. It breaks me."

 

[Saveli Pendleton]

Saveli hadn't expected to make her father cry, but for a moment a look of horror passed her face when saline drops slid down his cheeks. Saveli stood and moved aver, kneeling next to Montgomery's chair and listening to him talk, concern in her eyes, tears behind them just for the sight of him crying. Saveli supposed it was his turn though - he'd been there through so many of her tears, it was her time to take from him the pain he was bearing. His story of Auror training and failure touched the Slytherin alumni's heart, as she often felt her own failure was overwhelming. At least for once she felt as if she could understand Monty, they were connected by similarities they never could have predicted.

Saveli stood, steadying herself on the arm of the seat he had taken and wrapped her arms around her father, leaning over slightly to do so. She stroked his back for a moment, then squeezed him close to her, trying to find the words to say before pulling back to look him in the eyes. "You are so much braver than you give yourself credit for, dad." She started. "You walked around for hours in the pouring rain when I ran away to find me, you helped put the man that killed Ava's daughter in Azkaban, you face your own personal anxieties every day when you wake up, and you make me so proud to call you my crazy, big eared dad. Failure is required to learn from, you will learn from your time as an Auror in training, and use that knowledge to be a great Deputy and I know it." Saveli sniffed, hoping he'd stop crying before she started with him. "It's okay to be scared, courage isn't lack of fear, courage is having fear and pushing through anyways. You can do this. I'm rooting for you, Roo is rooting for you, and Ainmere will have to follow all the rules with you there." She said with a smile. "You can do this."

 

[Monty Pendleton]

Monty regretted everything he'd said the moment he finished saying it. He knew he couldn't burden Saveli with his own anxieties; she might have been an adult, and capable of comforting him, but that didn't make it her responsibility to do so. For a moment, he felt just like his mother, expecting his child to be able to pick up the broken pieces of his life, and though Saveli was nineteen, not seven, the guilt crushed him. He resisted her hug, and though he didn't pull away, was visibly relieved when she let go. She meant well with her words of encouragement - he knew she meant well - but suddenly the professor was overwhelmed with frustration. Her kindness contradicted the disparaging way with which he spoke to himself, and he did not want to hear it. He allowed her to finish, counting slowly in his head to keep himself calm. Much as he wanted to protest everything she had told him, he knew that it was not toward her his anger needed to be directed, and not her upon whom his problems should be shouldered.

"Thank you," he said, dying his face. "Just - please, stop. I'm fine. You don't have to do this." Monty stood up and crossed the room to stand by the window, needing some space. "Sorry. I know you mean well. I'm not sure what the matter is with me at the moment. I'm just... stressed." He sighed, rubbing his cheek. "But thank you. I'm sorry. I don't want to make you feel guilty about moving. You know I'm happy for you, don't you? I mean - I'm sad, obviously, but this - this, whatever this is - it isn't because of you. It's just my impeccable timing, as ever. As long as you're happy, I'm happy - so please, if you were tempted, don't feel responsible for me. Don't ever feel responsible for me, actually; it isn't your job." He wasn't sure if he was making the situation better or worse any more, but at least he'd managed to get a handle on his emotions. After a pause, he suddenly asked, "Are you happy?"

 

[Saveli Pendleton]

Saveli couldn't help but be confused, but Monty always seemed to do that to the girl when it came to emotional talks. He was either uncomfortable, or slightly less uncomfortable - and judging by how quickly he walked away from her he was the former. Saveli stood, crossing her arms over her chest and watching Monty, worry and caring in her grey orbs. "Dad you aren't making me feel guilty about leaving, and I don't feel responsible for you, I care about you. You're the only family I have left." She urged, her own eyes tearing up slightly. His next question caught the Slytherin Alumni off guard, and she looked at him with obvious shock on her pallid features. Sav looked at the chair beside her for a moment, pondering the question.

A lot had happened to her in the past year, and the last person she'd talked to about anything was Alana Finch - whom seemed in a hurry to escape the conversation after. Sav sighed and finally looked at Monty. "No. Not yet." She said honestly. She hadn't wanted to make the situation about her, but him opening the door allowed her time to think that she hadn't been giving herself. "It doesn't come easy though, to people like us right? People who have been through things like running away, and death." She wiped harshly at her face. "But i will be happy. I'm just not right now." She admitted, though not elaborating for the moment. The thoughts too raw to make an appearance in her vocabulary.

 

[Monty Pendleton]

Monty nodded, a weight lifting from his shoulders as Saveli assured him his worries were irrational. Still, he resolved then and there never to burden her with his problems again. Whether she realised it or not, he had placed the responsibility of comforting him in her hands, and it simply wasn't her job to do so.

Saveli's honesty hit him like a brick. Never would he have preferred her to lie, just to please him, but to know that his daughter was not happy brought the weight momentarily relieved piling straight down again. The worst part was that he understood; happiness was fleeting, undependable, often illusory even when it lingered. He didn't expect her to be happy all the time, but he'd hoped that with Reuben, Ainmere, and his continued support, some small amount of happiness might have subsisted beneath the pain. She was hopeful for the future, at least - or so she said. As Monty watched her, tears quivering in her eyes, he didn't know what to believe. He wiped at his own face again, though no new tears had come. "I'm always here for you," he said. "I will always be here. Even when you've moved - if you need me, just send an owl. You do want to move, don't you? You're not going only to please Reuben?"

 

[Saveli Pendleton]

Saveli didn't dare watch Monty's face and instead gave a dry laugh, something so typical for the blonde in painful or hard to explain situations. She shook her head. "You know tonight was supposed to be about you. What kind of messes are we?" She asked, looking up and meeting her father's eyes. "You're going to get so tired of my owls, and me apparating in at the worst times and scaring you." She said with a half smile before moving to sit down in a chair again, curling her knees up beside her. "I do want to move. It's just hard. I'm packing up all these memories you know. You were the first person who wanted anything to do with me after my parents left, and this was my home, my first warm and inviting home. And then Gabriel..." Saveli took in a breath. "I saw him a couple months before the baby was born, he was at the fashion show. god only knows why that creep was there, but he bumped into me. We didn't speak to each other but I know he knows - what if he comes around asking questions? Though I'm not sure he'd come here, because he's terrified of you I'm sure - especially after proving that the only thing he was after was not my friendship." Saveli sighed, how long had she been thinking about all of these things. "and I'm still confused at how Reuben could forgive me and not think about the fact that i even did that, because I know I haven't forgiven myself." She said, taking up her glass of wine again and finishing it. "And the worst part of all of this, the hardest part, is knowing that Prudence would know what to do. She would know. Also she would have beat Gabriel, but mostly she would know the right answer on how to get past all of this and be happy. But she's not here and now I feel like I have to make all of these decisions, and cope with all these things on my own, because there are just some details I can't tell you." She said finishing and taking a breath. "Although I do feel a little better saying all of this out loud."

 

[Monty Pendleton]

If Monty were entirely truthful, he was glad the evening wasn't about him any more. He didn't want to think about whether he'd made the right decision accepting his new position, or what sort of challenges he would have to face as a result, or whether he could cope with it all. He never liked to think of himself. It was largely why he tried so hard to think of everybody else.

The professor listened quietly as his daughter opened up, afraid to interrupt. When he realised she had more than one thing to say, he came to sit back down on the sofa beside her, though still he remained silent until she indicated she had finished. He wished more than anything to have the answers, so that he could help Saveli make sense of all that was in her head, but he was tired, and could scarcely make sense of it himself. There was a long pause before he found something to say, and it felt pitiful, but it was all he could offer. "Do you think it might help you to talk these things through with some sort of professional? I meant what I said about being here for you, but - well, I appreciate that there are some things you may not feel comfortable talking to me about, and a professional might be able to do more for you than just listen. Perhaps they'll be able to offer advice, or a solution. I just... want you to know that it's an option, if you'd like it. I wish I could do more for you, but I don't have the answers. I can only be here to support you."