Closed A Moment Alone

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx hummed to himself as he came into the park. He'd really enjoyed his school year so far. Good friends, things were great with his sister, classes were decent. He wandered through the trees, staying near the path but not on it. It was quiet times like these when his thoughts drifted to his parents. He wished he'd had a chance to know them. He smiled to himself and started to sing softly as he walked.

"You know I want you, It's not a secret I try to hide.
I know you want me, So don't keep saying our hands are tied.
You claim it's not in the cards, Fate is pulling you miles away.
And out of reach from me, But you're here in my heart.
So who can stop me if I decide, That you're my destiny?

What if we rewrite the stars?
Say you were made to be mine
Nothing could keep us apart
You'd be the one I was meant to find
It's up to you, and it's up to me
No one can say what we get to be
So why don't we rewrite the stars?
Maybe the world could be ours
Tonight."

His voice faded, and he leaned against a nearby tree. He swiped at his eyes, his other hand in his jacket pocket. That song always made him cry. He couldn't wait until he could show Sapphire the video of their parent's proposal. Uncle James and his dad had been in a band once and had played that song for his mother. He smiled sadly. He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't hear anyone approaching.

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

Jacob Kingsley was happy that it was a Brightstone weekend. He enjoyed getting away from the castle, which was much more stifling than it should be considering his size. The third year was walking around with a bag from one of the stores, having just finished shopping for a gift for his friend, Sapphire. Jacob couldn't remember when their relationship had solidified into a friendship, but it had certainly happened by this point. He enjoyed spending time with her even if her taste in friend's, aside from him, was somewhat questionable. He'd managed to befriend both of the Michaels twins, though it was a little easier to understand his friendship with Onyx. They were in the same house and same year so they ended up seeing a lot of each other. Lately though, their relationship had sort of morphed into something Jacob was having trouble nailing down and understanding. Onyx had twice thrown his arms around Jacob's shoulders at different events, which he'd never really done before and that was after he'd called Jacob dreamy. No one had ever called him dreamy, and though Jacob had long thought about bringing that night up again, he wasn't quite sure what to say. These were times he was angry that his brother wasn't around. And he wasn't quite friendly enough with anyone he'd be willing to share this with for feedback. Eventually, Jacob looked around, spotting Onyx from afar. He grinned and gave a shout. "There you are! I was lookin' for you in the village." Heading over to see what his friend was up to, Jacob was still too far to notice Onyx's expression. Hopefully, he'd be up for some fun. Jacob wasn't in the mood to head back to the castle just yet.

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx jumped at the sound of Jacob's voice. He swiped at his eyes roughly in an attempt to hide that he'd been crying. The last thing he needed was for the coolest guy in school to see him being a wimp. He took a few breaths to steady himself before walking towards Jacob. "Hey, Your Majesty. I was just taking the scenic route. What're you up to?" He asked, eyeing the bag. "Oooh, that looks special." Onyx teased the boy as he drew close. Still a bit embarrassed by his slight mix-up at the Halloween feast, he kept his hands in his pockets. Onyx did his best to smile brightly at Jacob, though he was almost certain his smile wobbled a bit. "Off buying me things are you?" He continued the joke, winking playfully. He didn't actually think whatever Jacob had was for him. It was just fun to tease him like he did.

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

Jacob noticed Onyx swipe at his eyes and wondered if he'd missed something, and when he drew closer, Jacob saw his smile wobble. Jacob shook his head, a grin on his face. "Good guess but wrong Michaels" he replied. It was a gift for Onyx's sister. Her birthday was still a way away but he knew he needed to buy the gift now or risk forgetting. "I was hoping you were up to something fun because I don't want to go back to the castle" he explained. "Let's see this scenic route" he reached out and tugged on Onyx's arm so they could begin walking. "Are you feeling ok?" he asked after a moment, letting Onyx know he wasn't completely oblivious.

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx pretended to pout. "Aww give her all the attention. Not that I blame you. We may be twins but she is just a touch, nay, a smidge more fabulous. It's the long hair." He teased, laughing a bit at his own joke. No one ever seemed to think he was funny so he had to do the work of telling and laughing at his own jokes. Onyx nodded as Jacob said he didn't want to go back to the castle. His heart fluttered just a bit as the other boy tugged on his arm.

"Sure, sure," He started off with Jacob. "I need to grab her something, anyway." He fell silent, trying to focus more on the boy next to him than the thoughts in his head. It wasn't really working well, and it didn't help when Jacob asked if he was okay. He froze for a moment, startled. "Huh?" Onyx squeaked before shaking his head quickly. "W-what? Yeah, uh," He cleared his throat. "Peachy. You?" He struggled to save his composure. He didn't really want to embarrass himself in front of Jacob, and he certainly didn't want to drag his issues out into the light.

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

"Riiiight" he continued the joking, nudging Onyx in the arm. Jacob liked how easy this all was with Onyx. They got along fairly easy and just had a lot of fun together. But, everything about Onyx's response to his question suggested to Jacob that things weren't peachy. He turned his head to look directly at his fellow Gryffindor, his gaze narrowing before he reached out a hand to stop Onyx walking on. "You're lying" he accused his friend. Jacob didn't know how else to say it but to say it, and he ignored the question about how he was doing.

He could tell something was bothering Onyx because he was usually more jokey than this and just different in general, but if he truly didn't want to talk about it, Jacob wouldn't force him. All he knew was that sometimes he needed a push to talk and he wondered if Onyx was the same. There was a lot about Onyx he didn't know even if he considered them pretty good friends. But he wanted to help if he could in any way. He wanted to be there for his friend because he hoped if he ever needed someone that Onyx would help him too. "If you don't want to talk about it, it's fine. I get it. But don't lie" he mumbled, a little grumpy. Jacob felt like too many people in his life were lying to him and keeping things from him. He didn't want Onyx to be part of that too.

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx sighed as Jacob confronted him. He looked away, rubbing the back of his neck. "You're right. Sorry." He bit his lip a moment, thinking. "I... I didn't really want to bug you with it," He muttered, "I just..." His shoulders slumped a bit. "I wish I knew them. I wish Sapph knew them. Uncle James is great, I love him, but I keep thinking there's so much my parents don't know. They'll never know..." He felt tears prick his eyes and he swiped at them quickly, rubbing his fist across his face before Jacob could see. "I'm sorry," He whispered, "I'm such a baby. You have enough problems without me being stupid," He let out a choked laugh and started to back up. "I can just... I'll just..." He stumbled a bit and fell back onto his bum. He sat there a moment, stunned, before letting out a surprised laugh.

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

Jacob didn't comment as Onyx spoke. He knew a little bit about the Michaels twins and their situation, just what Onyx and Sapphire had told him in the past. Sometimes, he forgot about it though and he felt embarrassed that he ever did, especially since he sometimes complained to them about his own parents. Jacob felt dumb, knowing that they probably hated when he did. He would, and he thought about his own cousin too and what she must think when he complained.

Jacob looked away pointedly when he noticed Onyx swipe at his eyes. He hated when people saw him cry so he didn't want Onyx to feel any more embarrassed. He was happy that Onyx trusted him enough to speak about all of this even if he didn't really know what to say and how to help. Jacob had never been good at that part, the helping. He would give it his best shot though because Onyx probably needed to hear something from him. Some of it, at least, was easy. "You don't have to be sorry" he replied. He shook his head again as Onyx backed up, his eyes widening as his friend fell over a bit. Jacob rushed forward, glad that Onyx was laughing at least, though he had a feeling it was the kind of laugh you did when you didn't want to cry. He knew it well. Kneeling in front of his friend, letting go of the bag he'd been holding, Jacob reached forward and put his hands on Onyx's shoulders. He looked his friend straight in the eyes before he spoke again. "You're not stupid and you're definitely not a baby. I'm the dummy, always complaining about my parents when you...when you're dealing with your situation." He gave Onyx a small smile. " I think they'd be happy you two are back together...and that you both happen to have the coolest friend in the world" his smile widened to a grin, hoping that joking a little was exactly what Onyx needed.

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx had looked down after he laughed, rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment. Great. Why couldn't he ever just be cool around Jacob? He glanced up, his eyes wide and his cheeks red as Jacob grabbed his shoulders. He listened as the other boy reassured him. He couldn't help but laugh a little. "Yeah, that last bits true," He tried to smile. "And, Jake, I... I don't mind when you complain about your parents. Sapphy either. I... I don't think you get just how much you mean to her. Or... to me."

Onyx blushed more, looking down. "She hasn't had many people in her life that have cared. She would do anything for you. And me? I..." He let out a nervous laugh. "I, um, I wasn't going to tell you. Uh, you... you can ignore this next bit. I just want you around. But, ah, Jake, um, Jacob..." Onyx stuttered, running his hands through his hair. "I... I really like you. Like, really, really, really like you, like, um... as more than friends." He rushed through the last part, bright red and terrified. Sure, they'd hung out before. But he wasn't as confident as he liked to pretend he was. He glanced up at Jacob, his heart pounding in his chest.

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

Jacob gave Onyx a look as if to show how obvious it was that what he'd said about being the coolest was true. He still had the grin on his face though it dimmed as the conversation remained serious. He'd expected the tone to lighten after his joke, but Onyx was still serious and he felt awkward remaining too smiley. Jacob took a moment to consider Onyx's words and what they meant. He was a Gryffindor. Loyalty was important to him. It was why he was so betrayed by his brother having left him behind and his parents divorce. They were supposed to be a family and always stick together and time and again, his family seemed intent on ripping itself apart. It was why he liked the Michaels twins. Because against the odds, they'd found each other.

He looked back at Onyx, a bit of a confused expression on his face as he seemed to struggle with something. He snorted as Onyx called him Jacob, a look of mock annoyance crossing his face. "Am I in trouble or something?" he kidded. He was about to add more when Onyx continued. Jacob blushed too, his ears burning. "Ohhhh" he replied, very aware of his hands on Onyx's shoulder now and how close they sat to each other. Suddenly, the dreamy comment took on a new meaning. Jacob had partially convinced himself it had been a joke. He moved one hand to his glasses, pushing them up and then after a moment's thought, returned it to Onyx's shoulder. "I...I'm" he licked his lips, extremely nervous as the words he wanted to say, planned to say set themselves up in his mind. "I like you too, Onyx" he smiled.

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx could feel the blush on his cheeks intensifying as Jacob stayed where he was. When the boy spoke again, Onyx's sapphire eyes widened. "W-what?" He managed, a smile threatening on the corners of his lips. He had never stopped to think maybe Jacob could like him back. For all Onyx's bluster, he didn't think he was cool enough for the other boy to notice him.

What happened next was unexpected. In a moment of rashness to rival his sister's tendency to never think things through, Onyx leaned forward and kissed Jacob. It was soft and shy, and incredibly hesitant. Unfortunately, Onyx's head caught up with him almost as soon as he'd done it. He pulled back quickly, blushing, eyes wide. "I-I um, uh, I-" He stammered, scooting back and out of Jacob's grasp. "Brightstone, yeah, we, um, presents," He threw together words as he hopped to his feet. He had never felt so flustered before. Jacob had never even liked holding hands and he had just gone and kissed- Onyx bit his lip and turned on his heel, trying to continue the way they were going. "We should- uh, this way, come on," He managed, hands shoved deep in his pockets and his hair falling to cover his eyes as he slumped forward.

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

The kiss was so quick that Jacob wasn't even sure it had actually happened, so soft that he almost hadn't felt any pressure...and drier than he'd expected. He'd only just felt the rake of Onyx's lips before they were gone. As Onyx hopped to his feet, quickly jumping into a conversation, Jacob rushed to follow, wondering what he'd done wrong. He licked his lips nervously and even covertly breathed into his palm, though he hadn't eaten anything weird on this day. He'd never kissed anyone before and, really, Onyx hadn't given him any time to respond. Had he? Jacob didn't know if he'd just been slow on the uptake and missed his opportunity. Jacob brushed his knees off, trying not to look out out. Sure, Onyx had just confessed to liking him and he'd replied similarly but it didn't mean anything, he reminded himself harshly. Jacob picked up his bag and followed, his gaze firmly in another direction. "It's a couple of joke books" he replied to a question that hadn't been asked. Jacob could pretend nothing had happened.

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx could hear his heart pounding in his ears. What should he say? Had he ruined everything? He jumped when Jacob spoke, so lost in his own thoughts he had nearly missed it. He didn't respond, slowing to a stop. He had started this, he couldn't just run away. "Jake," He croaked before shaking his head. "Wait," He whispered.

Onyx stepped over to the other boy and caught his face in his hands. Onyx leaned in close, stopping as their noses touched. He was visibly shaking. He let out a shaky breath. "Jake, I dunno... Would you mind, um..." He kept one hand on Jake's cheek, letting the other fall to his shoulder. "I- if you don't wanna, I'll go, I just, uh..." He trailed off, sure Jake could see the nervousness in his eyes. He had no clue what he was doing and he half expected to be punched in the face.

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

Jacob paused but the expression on his face was wary. When Onyx touched his cheeks, Jacob was torn between pulling away and staying in place. He'd never been this close to another boy before. He could have his second kiss if he wanted, he knew. A mix of nerves, excitement and a tinge of sadness filled him. And that's what caused him to pull back, shrugging Onyx's hand off his shoulder. He felt bad since he'd pretty much done the same to Onyx before and Onyx had let him, but Onyx was much more touchy feely than he was. "I don't want you to go but... you didn't even like the first one. You ran away" he accused, feeling bad about it. It was just too much too soon. Jacob was feeling overwhelmed. Here, he'd just thought Onyx hadn't liked the kiss and he was trying to do it again? Jacob knew he liked Onyx. At least he thought he did, but it was just all too much too soon and maybe he needed time to think. He really didn't want to lose Onyx as a friend and already he could feel that things had changed.

"I'm sorry" he mumbled before beginning to walk again, unsure if Onyx would follow. He stuffed his hands in his pockets, the bag banging into his thigh at every step. It was a minor annoyance though far more manageable than his bruised ego. "I've never done any of this before" he explained after a moment, though it was more to himself, an explanation of why he'd run away and not eagerly spent the day going from his first kiss to his first make out. That's what a normal thirteen year old would have done, he believed. Jacob sighed. Nothing ever seemed to go normally where he was concerned.

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx was startled, a little relieved, and a touch disappointed when Jacob shook him off. He took a second to follow after Jacob, running his hands over his face and trying to calm down. He looked up when Jacob accused him of not liking the first one. "What?" He croaked. He shook his head, hurrying after the other boy. Stupid voice changes. "Not true!" He defended as he started walking with Jacob. "I just... I know you aren't as comfortable with all this as I am. Or as touchy-feely, or something, I've just noticed you don't seem to like it when I get too clingy. Sapph's the same way. Not that I've tried kissing her, but you know what I mean. I think." He winced, rubbing his neck. He was a bit embarrassed by how many times his voice cracked while he was talking to Jake.

"Don't be sorry. I went over the top." He told the other boy, nudging him. "Though if you ever decide to go over the top too, I'm game," He teased. The blush was still on his face, but he felt more comfortable now. He wanted to hold Jake's hand but he'd pushed far enough for one day. "Hey," He nudged Jake again, "Thanks for putting up with my craziness. Honeydukes on me?" He asked, smiling at the other boy. Hopefully, Jake wasn't too put off by Onyx's stupidity.

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

Jacob's eyes were full of confusion for several seconds as he tried to comprehend what Onyx was saying. So he hadn't hated the kiss. Bit was something, at least. Jacob knew he'd ponder it again and again a little later but he was far too distracted by what Onyx was saying as he continued. It was true that he'd never been into public displays of affection. He typically shrugged away from his mother when she tried to kiss him on the cheek in public though he was fine with other things. Lizzie often ruffled his hair and that was fine. But, if Onyx meant something else, Jacob was going to be a little annoyed. As Onyx continued, Jacob relaxed slightly. It seemed to just be about the touching.

Onyx seemed fine with the idea of it happening again, and Jacob rolled his eyes but found himself grinning anyway. It probably wouldn't hurt to try again at some point and maybe practice more. He was pretty sure kissing was supposed to be something more than what had just happened. Noah seemed to enjoy it well enough so he knew it couldn't just be that because it had been a little... underwhelming. He didn't blame Onyx at all since he had a feeling Onyx had done this before. It had to be something he did wrong since this had been his first kiss. "Ok" he added with a shrug. Chocolate did sound good right about now. He continued walking, much slower still a little worried that maybe he was just a bad kisser. "So you really, really, really didn't hate it? You're not just telling me that?"he asked quietly.

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx smiled warmly at Jacob and nudged his arm with his own. "Of course I didn't." He told the boy fondly. "I know I screwed it up pretty royally. Did you not like it?" He asked, biting his lip at the thought. "I was always too busy traveling with Uncle James and working on my killer drum skills to worry much about this kind of thing before... it was my first time," he admitted softly. "I know Uncle James said when you kiss someone for the first time, it's supposed to be magical. I doubt I made that," He joked lightly, rubbing his neck awkwardly. The blush still hadn't faded from his face.

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

Jacob thought about lying for a moment, especially when Onyx said it had been his first kiss too. That surprised him. He'd always thought that Onyx had a lot of experience because he was so gregarious and clingy. Both made him think he'd had a ton of practice with this kind of thing. It felt good to know he wasn't too far behind his friends with this kissing. He'd heard that some people in his year had already kissed. He knew Sapphire had. Diana said she had, but he didn't believe that. Stopping, the Gryffindor turned to his friend. "Ok...I wasn't going to say anything but it was kind of...eh" he waved his hand back and forth a little. Jacob didn't blame Onyx especially now that he knew they were both in the same boat. He pushed on, hoping Onyx wouldn't be mad at him. He didn't think he'd ever had the Gryffindor angry at him before and didn't want that to change. It was bad enough that this very well might have changed everything between them anyway, but he didn't want them mad at each other. "If this was both our first kiss, I think...I think we owe it to ourselves to make it better. Let's pretend that one didn't happen and... try again?" He tried to state this all as matter of fact as possible, but his ears still burned brightly. The idea of rejection at this stage felt like a very real possibility, especially since he'd just turned down Onyx a few moments before. But that was before he knew this was both of their first kisses and before he knew Onyx suspected it wasn't great. Jacob didn't know what he wanted to happen after this but he wanted at least this moment to be one they'd think back on fondly. He'd heard that everyone remembered their first kiss.

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx nodded at Jacob's response. He had suspected as much. He hadn't felt quite right about that attempted kiss either. Not that the idea itself was bad, it's just how he had gone about it. Acting on impulse and then instantly doubting himself and pulling back before Jake could react- not really the most romantic thing in the world. He stuck his hands in his pockets and started to consider ways he could try to make it better next time when Jake spoke again. Onyx slowed, looking to his friend with wide eyes. "W-what?" His voice cracked again, so he cleared his throat. "I-I mean, yeah, s-sure, heh," The unending blush seemed to burn a little hotter on his face. "I, ah, I'm okay with that." Onyx offered a nervous smile to the other boy. He held still, not wanting to push things again. Instead, he looked to Jake to see what he wanted to do.

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

Jacob could see Onyx blushing and knew he had to look pretty similar. He could feel his face burning, the heat in his ears especially. Jacob returned the smile, his a little shy, before cutting his gaze away for a few seconds at the surrounding park. He half expected Onyx to rush in again, but it seemed this time the boy was going to leave things to him. Jacob knew he couldn't just stand there so he placed a hand on Onyx's shoulder and slowly leaned in. He seemed to have misjudged the distance because he kept on and on leaning in until finally their lips met again, his nose a little squished until he adjusted. This time felt different from the beginning. As their lips met, Jacob felt the pressure against his own lips as his hand gripped Onyx's shoulder. There was a lot to think about, he realized, and he pulled back a moment later, taking in a deep breath. He'd not been sure about how to breathe while he was kissing Onyx, and he felt a little winded.

 

[Onyx Derouin]

Onyx bit his lip in the silence that followed. He wasn't sure what to expect. His breath hitched in his throat as Jacob put his hand on his shoulder and started to lean in. Oooohkay, okay okay okay okay, Onyx nearly panicked as Jacob drew closer. He was going to mess it up again, he was sure of it. He stood still, frozen in place, heart thundering in his ears. It wasn't until Jacob's lips pressed against his that Onyx was able to move again. A hand came up to rest gently against the one on his shoulder. His eyes closed and he felt himself kissing Jake back. It felt like his heart was on fire, ready to burst out of his chest.

As Jake pulled away Onyx lowered his head. He was sure he was blushing bright enough to light up his entire body. He couldn't keep the stupid smile off his face as he brought his hand up to his lips. "Yeah," he managed after a moment, "That was a lot better."

 

[Jacob Kingsley]

Jacob chuckled, a little bashful at Onyx's words. He pulled his hand away from the teenager's shoulder, ducking his head. Now he understood the fuss. He could get why couples stole away into corners to do that. Jacob had felt a small flutter in his stomach before and now it had blossomed into a bigger one. "Yeah" he replied, quite pleased that Onyx seemed to have been as affected by the kiss as he had. Jacob took another second to relish in the moment before gathering himself together. "I still get Honeydukes, right?" he joked. He definitely had enough in his pocket to cover his own snack and then some. Mostly, Jacob wanted to make sure they were still good and that even though everything had changed that nothing had changed. Jacob felt different. He couldn't wait to find his cousin later and tell her about this. He told her everything.